Chapter 11
Carson
W hen you wait years for something and you finally have it in your grasp, the feelings you get are indescribable. When I finally pull away from Jenny’s lips, my fucking hands are shaking. So much has happened tonight that I’m busy trying to wrap my mind around it. But the only thing I really need to know is Jenny loves me. I thought I had lost her, but she’s given me the words I’ve been dying to hear for years. There’s no way she’s getting away from me now .
I look over at her. Her eyes are wide in surprise and her hand is gently touching her swollen lips .
Lips swollen from my kiss .
“What are you thinking?” I ask her, my voice gruff .
“That this may be the best birthday I’ve ever had in my life,” she whispers and for some reason that makes me smile .
“It’s not your birthday yet, honey .”
“It’s not?” she asks, confused, her eyes still dilated. She’s staring straight at my mouth. My smile broadens. I like knowing my kiss has affected her so much .
“Your birthday is tomorrow,” I tell her .
“Oh,” she whispers. “Will you kiss me for my birthday ?”
I’m pretty sure she doesn’t know what she’s asking .
“You like my kisses ?”
“So much,” she whispers. “I’ve been dreaming of them forever .”
“Do you dream of me doing more than kissing you ?”
“Carson,” she mumbles, her eyes moving to the floor, her face flushing to a deep pink. I take the small step forward, closing the distance between us, and put my finger under her chin to bring her gaze back to my face .
“Answer me, honey,” I order her gently .
“That’s not really fair, Carson .”
“What’s not fair ?”
“You asking me questions and just demanding I answer them. What about you? Do you dream of me ?”
“Every fucking night,” I answer without hesitation .
“See… What?... Oh… You do ?”
Seeing the different emotions flicker over her face is a treat I could watch for days. Yet, when my words finally register, it is the flare of desire I see that captures my attention .
“I live for the night, Jenny. Do you know why?” I ask, letting my finger move from under her chin and trail along the side of her face. I hear her drag a shuddered breath through her lungs and smile because it literally rocks through her body. She wants me, and she’s not adept enough to keep it hidden— thank God .
“Why?” she asks, biting on her lip .
“Because all day long I work like a dog so I’ll come home too tired to miss you .”
“I… You miss me ?”
“So fucking much,” I murmur. “But working my ass off never works, Jenny. So I get in the shower and wash off the dirt and grime, wishing you were with me .”
“ You do ?”
“Fuck yes. Why do you think I had the master bath redone a few years back ?”
“ I — ”
“It was so that when the time came, and I finally claimed you, our bath was ready .”
“Claimed… Our…” she repeats and I know she’s weighing each word and understanding the gravity of them. I want her to. “What would it be ready for, Carson ?”
“For the day I come in from working and you’re in that shower with me .”
“You want me to shower with you?” she asks. Shock is evident on her face, but it can’t overshadow the desire that is there too .
“I more than want it honey, I crave it. I want your hands on me after a long day in the field. I want you touching me, holding me …”
“ Carson — ”
“Most of all I want to push you against the shower wall and fuck you raw,” I tell her and the need in my voice vibrates with hunger .
“Oh, God,” she says, trembling .
I place my hand on her stomach and press it flat .
“I won’t rest until you’re carrying my baby, Jenny. I want your stomach stretched with our child, knowing that a part of each of us is growing inside of you. Am I scaring you, Jenny ?”
“No,” she whispers, surprising me. “I love everything you’re saying .”
“Tell me, Jenny,” I urge, needing her to admit to everything .
“I want all of that, Carson .”
“All—” Before I can finish and tell her exactly what I need from her, Jenny surprises me by doing exactly that .
“I want your baby, Carson,” she whispers and finally it feels like everything I’ve ever wanted is within my reach. “I want you as mine .”