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Right Under My Nose by Parker, Ali, Parker, Weston (61)

61

Holden

The first day back after spring break, I knew I had to do something to make the transition a little easier for Hunter. So the two of us had come down to the diner not far from the school for some breakfast, and Hunter was happily chatting about how much he had enjoyed his break with Autumn and me.

“I’m so glad everything’s back to normal,” he said as he took a sip of his apple juice. I smiled at him.

“Me, too, son,” I agreed. “Me too.”

“Do you think Autumn’s going to stick around this time?” he asked, the question simple but laced with meaning. I knew he didn’t mean it that way, but it was impossible not to read it as that, as him trying to grope for a sense of security after the mess of everything that had happened.

“I think she will.” I nodded, and he grinned.

“Do you think…?” He swallowed the words before he could say them.

“Do I think what?” I pressed him. I had noticed Hunter opening up a lot more than he usually did since Autumn had come back, and it made me pretty damn happy to see him speaking his mind more clearly than before.

“Do you think Autumn is going to be my mom?” he asked finally, and I smiled at him. That was about the sweetest thing I’d ever heard him come out with.

“You know, I don’t—” Before I could continue, my phone buzzed against my hip, and I pulled it out of my pocket. A text from Autumn. I opened it up, assuming it was just going to be a “good morning” message, but my heart dropped when I saw what it really was.

I scanned the message three times before it really sank in. Karla had come to the school, trying to guilt-trip Autumn into letting her see Hunter. Autumn had turned her away, but Karla had seemed intent on letting her know she wasn’t just going to vanish that easily. I switched off my phone and closed my eyes for a moment. She was getting closer. Had she seen us at the carnival? Had she followed us there?

“Dad?”

I opened my eyes and found my son sitting opposite me, the son I was trying my hardest to protect from all of this. My heart sank as I realized he had to know the truth. I couldn’t keep hiding this from him. If she was moving in on his school, God only knew where else she might try to find him, and I needed him to be able to stand up for himself if she did turn up somewhere when we weren’t expecting it.

“Hunter, there’s something I need to tell you.” I leaned toward him seriously. His eyes widened.

“Is it about Autumn?” he asked, and I shook my head.

“No, no, it’s nothing to do with that,” I assured him. “It’s about… it’s about your mother.”

He sat there for a moment, staring at me. I had never really talked to him about his mother before, and I knew that was my fault. I should have sat him down before this, explained the truth to him instead of trying to duck it every time the question arose. Now I was in a place where I had no choice but to tell him what was going on—and no choice but to scare him with the knowledge that she was back in town.

“What about her?” he asked, his voice tiny. As I sat there opposite him, it struck me how small he was. I suddenly wanted to grab him and hug him close, promise him that nobody was ever going to get near him, promise that I was going to keep him safe from his mother no matter what. But I didn’t know how I could do that. I needed him in on the situation so he could help me in protecting himself.

“When you were just born,” I began, tracing the story all the way back to the start. “Your mother left us.”

“Why?” His face dropped, and I felt instantly guilty for telling him about this. I had to swallow it down and tell him to watch out for Karla, not that she was his mother and that she wanted him back but that he couldn’t be with her. It was too complex. But I had started already, and I was going to finish.

“There were a lot of reasons, son.” I shook my head. “But none of it had to do with you. You understand that, right? She left because she wanted to, not because she didn’t want you or like you.”

“I don’t understand.” He shook his head, and I felt that punch of guilt once more. This was so much to put on him. But he needed to know the truth, or at least as much of it as he could handle, if we were going to keep him safe from Karla. She would use whatever she could to get to him, and the last thing I wanted was for him to believe she really did want him back when he was only another pawn in one of her sick little games.

“I don’t either, Hunter,” I replied. “It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that she left. I never really understood why she did it. But eventually, I realized that it was for the best. She wasn’t a good person, the woman who gave birth to you, and it was better that she was out of our lives. Even though it was hard sometimes, and I know it must have been hard for you, having these questions that never got answered.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Hunter asked, and there was a helpless tone to his voice. I hated that he felt this way, hated that I was even forced to have this conversation with him, but there was no avoiding it. He needed to know what was going on. I couldn’t risk Karla swooping in and exploiting his ignorance about her for her own personal gain. The thought of her getting her claws into him—no, I would never let that happen.

“Because…” I took a long, deep breath before I continued, knowing that I had to tell him the truth but hating that I had to weigh him down with it. “Because your mother came back into my life recently.”

His eyes widened so far, it would have been comical if it hadn’t been for the situation at hand. He stared at me for a long time, as though expecting me to take back what I said and admit it had been a joke. But I didn’t. He looked down at the table, trying to process what he had heard, and then looked back up at me once more.

“What does she want?” he asked quietly. I shook my head.

“I don’t know,” I confessed. “At least, I’m not sure. I have some ideas, but I don’t think she’s back for any—I don’t think it’s good news, Hunter.”

“What do I do?” His eyes widened again, and he looked so nervous, I wanted to drive him back home and lock the doors and spend the whole day making him feel safe again. But I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t let Karla use her influence to scare me into keeping my son on lockdown. I wasn’t going to let her have that much power over either of us.

“If any woman approaches you when you’re at school or you’re out and about, you go to someone you trust right away, okay?” I told him. “Make sure you don’t leave with her. I’m going to get you a phone with my number and Autumn’s number on it, and you can call either of us, and we’ll be there right away to pick you up, all right?”

“All right,” he replied bravely, trying to keep his face set solid, but I could see the waver of panic in his eyes. I felt a swell of anger at Karla, anger at making us go through this, anger that she had forced my son to endure this kind of fear. She was no mother to him. She was using him, moving back into his life because there was some kind of personal gain in it for herself. And now she had made it to the school, to Autumn. She was making his life unsafe, and she probably still thought she was in the right about it.

“You’re being so brave about this,” I told him, reaching across to pat his arm. “But it’s okay if it freaks you out too. Autumn and I are going to take care of you every way we can. You understand that, right?”

“Yes.” He nodded, and I closed my eyes.

“Good,” I replied, and I noticed that he had finished his breakfast. “You want to go to school? Autumn’s going to be there waiting for you.”

“Yeah, I do,” he said, and I paid up and we headed out to the car. I noticed that Hunter was sticking close by my side, looking around as though he expected Karla to leap out from behind a car at any moment. I hated that he had to feel that way, but at least it meant he was going to be alert to the danger now. Better for him to know and have some way to push back against it than it was for him to be innocent of everything that was going on and leave himself vulnerable to her swooping in and sweet-talking him into leaving with her.

I switched the radio to the channel he liked in the car on the way to school, but he kept his gaze fixed out of the window. I wanted to talk to him, to ask what was going through his mind, but I had no idea how to start that conversation. I should have discussed this stuff with him years ago, should have known Karla would find some way to come sliding back into our lives, but I supposed I would have to work with what I had for the time being.

When I got to the school, Autumn was waiting next to the gate for us as she told me she would be in her text. She smiled when she saw us, but her arms were wrapped tight around herself like she was protecting herself from something.

“Hey, Hunter!” she greeted him perkily. “You ready to start classes again?”

“Yeah.” Hunter nodded, subdued, and she shot me a look and a smile.

“I’ll talk to you more later,” I told her quickly. “After school. Thanks for letting me know.”

“Of course,” she said. She touched my arm briefly.

“It’s going to be all right,” she assured me. “We’ll take care of him, I promise. And I’ve told everyone to be on the lookout for her, so she’s not going to be able to make it onto school property again that easily.”

“Thank you.” I sighed, not realizing how much I had needed to hear that. “I’ll see you soon.”

“See you.” She bid me farewell, and she led Hunter back toward the school. I planted my hands on my hips and watched them go. I was scared, really scared, for the first time in a long time. But I also knew Autumn would fight as hard as I would to protect him, and that was something. It was enough. For now. Until I could find a way to get Karla out of our lives for good.

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