Chapter 30

Kelsey spent the days that Kurt was away inundating herself with the dogs and an endless list of chores, and enjoying the company of Ida, Tess, and Patrick whenever there was a bit of downtime. The only part of her normal routine that she missed was swinging by the shelter at night to bring home one of the dogs. That didn’t seem like the right thing to do when she was sleeping at Sabrina’s. Bringing another dog through the door could add stress and cause undue excitement for the dogs that were here.

She contented herself at night with cuddling the puppies, which seemed to be getting bigger by the hour, and hanging out with Mr. Longtail, who was decidedly more affectionate in Kurt’s absence.

By the time Kelsey made it to night four, Thursday night, she tucked herself into bed and pulled out her phone for another quick look at Kurt’s most recent text.

I should be home tomorrow midmorning. Can’t wait to see you. It’s been too long.

Home. Like love, it was a simple, often taken for granted word. She knew he could have meant St. Louis—or even Missouri for that matter, and not specifically this house—but she couldn’t help but connect this place with him. She wondered if he had any idea how it fit him so perfectly: beautiful and complex and rugged, and just unpolished enough to have immeasurable character. She also knew he was one of the few people who could love it as much as it was meant to be loved.

She fell asleep listening to the puppies’ soft sounds carrying across the top floor of the house and with her hand a barrier between her face and Mr. Longtail’s. He wouldn’t stop trying to nip her nose as he purred and settled down across two pillows.

Like the other nights she’d spent here, this one passed impossibly fast, and she blinked her eyes open to the first light of dawn. And to the sight of Kurt, asleep but fully clothed, lying atop the covers next to her.

She held her breath and counted out a handful of seconds to be sure it wasn’t a dream. It was real. Kurt was back and in bed beside her. A small, brown paper bag was clutched in one hand by his stomach. The other arm was extended, and his hand rested on her hip. Mr. Longtail was at the top of his pillow, curled around Kurt’s head.

Four long but busy days disappeared into nothingness. It was if he’d never been away a single minute. His chest rose and fell with ease. The tension that sometimes lined his forehead was gone, and he looked like a cross between an angel and a soldier, impossibly tough and vulnerable at the same time.

She studied him as the sun peeked over the horizon, wanting to commit him to memory, but trusting she didn’t have to. He loved her, and he was home.

Then her phone alarm was blaring out Avicii’s “Wake Me Up,” and Kurt was awake and sitting up. Mr. Longtail rose to his feet, arching his back and stretching. Kelsey clicked off the alarm and sat up next to Kurt. Frankie, who’d been sleeping on the rug at the bottom of the bed, stood and dipped into a deep stretch.

“Welcome back, traveler. I didn’t think you’d be here until lunchtime.”

Kurt swiped the sleep from his eyes and grinned. “I ended up driving through last night.” He leaned close and pressed his lips against her temple. “Picking between sleeping another few hours in my car and catching a bit next to you was an easy decision.” He closed one arm around her and swept her hair back with the other, kissing her neck. “Kels, I owe you an apology. A big one. I’ll never leave again without telling you first. Hell, I can’t imagine having anywhere else to go.”

“I was never mad, just worried.”

“I’m sorry,” he repeated. “But I was in good hands. I had Frankie.”

She laughed. “Yes, you were.” She swallowed and thought of telling him that the last time she’d slept with someone, it had led to the end of a several-year friendship, but then decided it was pointless. That was a lifetime ago, and it wasn’t with Kurt.

“What happened to make you take off so quickly?” she asked instead. “Was it seeing the fishing float I put on the kitchen windowsill? Your mom figured out where you went. She explained it to me the best she could, about your grandma.”

Kurt sat straight and stared at her, blinking. “You put that float in the kitchen? I guess there’s an answer for everything in time. But why? How?”

She shrugged and smiled. “Because I found it on the beach when I was a kid. I had it on my desk at the shelter forever. The other day, I decided to bring it here.”

He dragged a hand through his hair, shaking his head. He was still a solid minute, then he started to laugh. It was a hearty, deep laugh of relief. “Of course. Of course you did. It couldn’t have happened any other way.”

He stood up and paced the room, the first light of the day glowing in his hair. Frankie watched him pace without missing a beat on the nylon bone he’d begun to chew.

“Did it help?” she asked finally. “Going there?”

“It did,” he said, taking a seat at the edge of the bed. “Kels, there are things I haven’t told you about my life before, things I may never be able to tell you. Friends, dogs that I didn’t or couldn’t protect. Choices I made. I’m too much like William for words to ever come easy—”

“It’s okay, they don’t have to.”

He held up a hand. “My grandmother used to say that nothing up to today matters unless you choose for it to matter. Sometimes that makes sense, and sometimes it feels impossible. But a part of me has to believe it, because rather than running, I came here. I saw you six weeks ago on that news story, and I made a choice to stop running, stop evading, and I let you in. I let this house in and these dogs. Hell, when the time comes that he goes up for adoption, I’m going to throw my name into the hat for Frankie, even if it means going down to a one-dog house for a while. As long as you agree.”

Kelsey blinked. As long as I agree to what?

Kurt lifted the forgotten bag off the bed and got up, walking around until he was directly at her side. He sank into a squat, resting on his heels.

“This isn’t a proposal, so you can stop looking like a deer in headlights.”

She bit her lip, unable to stop the smile from spreading across her face. “Thank God, because I’d be tempted to kiss you and I definitely have morning breath.”

“If it were, this would be a real kneel and I’d have had the sense to let you get dressed first. What am I saying? No, I wouldn’t. I love the way you look first thing in the morning in your pajamas with your hair all mussed, and when you’re asleep too.”

He smiled and passed her the bag. “It isn’t much, but it stands for something bigger. At least, I’m really hoping it does.”

Kelsey tucked back a strand of hair and sat straighter, folding her legs into a pretzel under the sheets. “Should I open it now?”

He nodded. Frankie had meandered over, and Kurt closed his hand over the top of his head, his nylon bone sticking out of his mouth like a cigar.

It was a plain paper bag stamped with the name of a store in Cannon Beach, Oregon. Kelsey sifted through tissue paper until her fingers closed over a small object. She pulled it out to find that it was a blown-glass Christmas ornament. It was a shiny dog figurine—a tan puppy wearing a Santa hat.

“It’s so cute. I love it.”

Kurt wrapped a hand over her wrist. “I asked her to keep it a surprise, but I spoke with Megan a few times on my way home. You know that things are moving in court. The first round of dogs, Zeus and a few of the others, might be able to head for the shelter in a month or less. Which means we could have a bit of space on the lower floor by Thanksgiving. Enough at least for a Christmas tree. A giant one. And I’m hoping this is the first of a lot of ornaments, Kels. I love you, and I want to make a home with you. This home, actually. I know you weren’t that crazy about it in the beginning, but I’m hoping you’ve changed your mind.”

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I love this house. It took me awhile to realize it, but I do. I love it. I can’t imagine liking a house more than I do this one.”

“I was hoping you’d say that because I’d like to buy it. I’d like to live here, with you.”

“Kurt, I don’t know if that’s possible. For now it is, but the shelter will sell it at auction and probably not for years from now, and if you keep fixing it like you’ve been doing, it’ll go for a lot of money. I’m not sure we’d be able to afford it.”

He rose and pressed his lips against her forehead, then sat beside her. “What if I told you the attorneys reviewed the will and found a stipulation of sale that works in my—in our—favor?”

“What do you mean? I thought Mr. Longtail would have to be gone—”

“Not if Ida consents to an early sale, which she has.”

“How do you know this?”

“Because with a bit of sleep figured in, it’s a two-day drive between here and Cannon Beach. I had time to think. Time to make some calls. I wanted to tell you in person. The house is ours, if we want it. I know I do, and I’m hoping you do too.”

Kelsey sat speechless, taking it all in. “You want to live with me, here, now.”

“Here, yes, and forever. I love you, Kelsey. And I’m not afraid to tell you I want the whole package. I thought you might want to take it slower than a full proposal in less than six weeks, and honestly I wanted to plan it better—”

Kelsey silenced him with a kiss. There was a hint of salt on his lips. She wondered if it was from the ocean or something more recent, like a gas station snack.

She’d gone to the ocean once and found something that she’d been too afraid to admit until now proved she was the luckiest person on earth. She’d just been waiting all this time to let it in.

She ran her hands over the top of his strong shoulders, then his smooth neck, then his silky hair. She had the rest of her life to get used to being with him. As Frankie went back to gnawing on his bone and Mr. Longtail began to knead his front paws into her hip, she knew one thing already. She loved Kurt as much as she’d ever imagined loving anyone.

“Yes,” she said. “Yes to everything.”