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Strength by Amy Daws (33)

 

STOP WISHING AWAY YOUR PAST, Hayden. Start wishing to make the most of your future.”

Vi’s words are a strike to my heart as I glance down at my watch to see 11:11 approaching. “Fuck,” I mumble, cupping my head in my hands at the head table.

How I thought I could ever survive a world without Vi is beyond me. Kissing her is like breathing. Necessary and rudiment for survival. In the short time I’ve known her, she’s brought so much out in me. I hate myself for not seeing it sooner.

Leslie bustles over in her huge gown, her happy eyes widening as she takes in my pained expression. “What happened?” she asks as she slides into a chair beside me.

“I love her, Leslie. I love, love her,” my voice croaks as I exhale a painful sigh over the fear that it might not be enough. “But I think I’ve ruined it.”

“Nonsense,” she says, yanking my hands away from my head. “You didn’t ruin anything. Hayden, do you have any idea how much it took for me to fall for your brother? He chased me all through London because my outlook on love was terrible. My past saw to that. But look at me right now. Do you see anything in me besides one hundred percent certainty in my feelings for Theo?”

I shake my head incredulously. “You guys make it look easy.”

“Love is never easy. But when it’s right, it’s number one above everything.” She touches my wrist gently, and my brows crumple in silent pain. “If she’s the one, Hayden, you have to show her that you will put her first…above your past.”

“I’ve spent years wishing away my past,” I reply, staring down at her hand cupping my wrist, my eyes nervously flashing to the time on my watch.

“Then start there. Prove it to her somehow. Hell, make a splash, Hayden!” she exclaims and grabs the wireless mic from the table.

I stare at it in horror. “No. Not here. Not now.”

“There’s no better time, baby bro. I don’t know if you noticed, but Theo and I are kind of on your side and stuff.” She winks playfully and offers me a saccharinely sweet smile. “And we want Marisa to have a cousin sooner rather than later.”

I roll my eyes, but the corner of my mouth lifts. I glance down at my watch again. Only a few minutes to go. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Vi striding back to her table. Gareth stands and she gestures to her jacket. He looks confused but hands it to her.

No! She can’t leave. Before I even make a conscious decision to do what I’m about to do, my fingers wrap around the mic. “Just remember you fucking asked for this.”

Leslie giggles with excitement. “Oh my God, this is going to be awesome. Do it to it!”

“I’m doing it,” I growl as I flick the mic on halfway through my sentence. A loud crack and hiss of feedback halts everyone’s conversations. “Uh, sorry. Hiya. Um.” I suck in my cheeks and bite down to stop myself from cursing. “I’m Hayden Clarke, Theo’s brother.”

“And mine,” Leslie chirps quietly from beside me. The crowd looks up at me excitedly. Except Vi.

“I know speeches happened already, but there’s one more speech I need to make.” The background music suddenly cuts off, and I see Jaci no K press through the frozen couples on the dance floor. She is staring at me in horror over messing with her perfectly mapped itinerary. My nerves roll in like a dust storm as I add, “And I’m sorry, but it has nothing to do with the bride and groom.”

I tear my watchful eyes from a furious Jaci and glance pointedly at Vi. Her jaw hangs open as she remains unmoving by the table. She looks so fucking gorgeous, even with her gobsmacked mouth.

“Vi,” I start, looking down awkwardly. “You told me once that I don’t get to keep forever to myself, and I’d like to repeat those words back to you right now.”

A few gasps echo in the room, and I look up to see her bring a hand to her mouth in shock. “Your forever is mine, Vi. Your forever belongs to me whether you’re ready to accept it or not.

“I was afraid there was too much that time could not erase for me.” I peek down at my watch and see there are still two minutes to go. “But when I hold you in my arms, time doesn’t even exist anymore. I feel brand new. I feel happy and healthy. I was so determined to get there on my own that I couldn’t accept all that you were giving me. You listened to every horrid moment of my life and not one of them scared you away.”

My head drops. The feeling in my chest that started as a trickle the first moment I saw her now bursting inside of me like a gushing pipe.

“Vi Harris, falling for you has been a series of single, solitary important moments. That moment I first saw your tears as we sat together in the dog park. That moment Bruce knocked you over on your porch and you just giggled. God that giggle.” I close my eyes against the tears. “That moment when I watched you holding my niece,” I croak and then open my eyes to meet her glossy gaze again. “That moment you kissed my scars.

“Vi, you’re afraid that you’re unlovable? Bunny, I fell in love with you the day we ran in the rain outside your flat. There was a moment when you looked at me and saw into my soul. Christ, Vi, I love you. I’ve never felt more alive than right this moment, loving you.”

A sob erupts from Leslie, but I refuse to look down. I refuse to break my blurred, tunnelled, suspended view of the woman I love.

“It’s 11:11, Vi. And my final wish—my final request to the universe—is that I will save all my wishes for you. Every one of them. Belongs to you.”

Her face crumples as she cups her mouth to hide her sobs. Gareth motions with his head for her to come to me, and my grasp instantly releases the mic. I rush around the table and slip between the couples still frozen in shock on the dance floor. She bustles over to me, her blonde hair and red dress flowing freely behind her.

Just as we connect in the middle…

Just as my trembling hands take hers in mine…

Just before she presses her lips to my mouth…

…I look into her glittering blue eyes and realise that all of those wishes I made before trying to change my past would have kept me from this beautiful reality standing in my arms.

“I love you, Vi. I’ve loved you for so many moments, and I don’t want to waste any more time not telling you.”

She silences me with her lips. Her perfect fucking lips that kiss me harder than I’ve ever been kissed in my entire life. Or maybe it’s just a normal, everyday kiss but feels different now that everything’s changed.

She pulls away, reverently wiping away the tears falling freely down my face. “You could have just said all that earlier, you know. Who knew My Hayden had such a flare for the dramatics?” she giggles.

God, she fucking giggles.

She kisses me once more before pulling back and whispering in my ear the words that I’m finally ready to hear. The words that have the ability to bring me to my knees and raise me right back up.

“I love you, too,” she says with a sigh.

I smirk.

She loves me, too.

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