I leaned in to kiss him, to reassure him that I didn't blame him. He needed to know that none of this was anyone's fault. Before my lips could touch his, he took a step back, turning his face from mine.

The sickening realization hit me as I dropped my hands. My biggest fear was coming true right in front of me. Telling him who I really was had changed how he felt about me. It'd just taken him a couple minutes to realize it.

My stomach lurched, and I could feel the pain already starting to bubble up. I moved farther away so he could have the space he so clearly wanted. It would kill me to leave, but at least now I knew for certain that I had nothing to stay for. I wouldn't marry Bruce – I couldn't now that I knew what real love felt like – but I would at least have my family.

“Sorry,” I whispered. “I understand if, after everything you’ve just heard, you don’t want me anymore.” My voice faltered on the last word. I couldn’t believe I'd been so stupid. Whether he believed me or not, it was a lot for anyone to handle. Too much apparently. After being honest about everything, I'd lost him anyway.

As I started to turn away, Gracen moved. Except he didn't move away from me. Instead, he closed the distance between us with two long strides and grabbed the tops of my arms, forcing me to face him. His hands rose to my face, and he used his thumbs to brush away the tears that had begun to fall.

“Look at me, Honor.” His voice was earnest, and I raised my eyes. “It does not matter where or what time you are from. I want you, and I love you. Nothing will change that. I swear it on everything I hold dear.”

He kissed me then, pouring more love and passion into it than I'd felt from Bruce in all the years I'd known him. I slid my arms around Gracen's neck, ran my fingers through his hair. His touch was gentle, but I felt the strength in him, the restraint he used not to be rough with me. I leaned closer to him, wanting him to lose control, but he pulled away instead and brushed back a loose strand of hair.

He kissed my forehead, and I took the opportunity to get the air my lungs demanded. I'd experienced fear in various forms in my life, but nothing as intense as what I felt when I finally told Gracen everything. The risk had been worth it, even though I knew there was one more thing I had to say about it.

“Can you forgive me for lying to you?” I asked. He'd asked for my forgiveness, but I needed his as well.

“There is nothing to forgive,” he whispered, resting his forehead against mine. We stood like that for a moment and then he straightened. His expression was tight when he looked down at me. “Do you still want to go back?” he asked. “Back to your own time?”

I opened my mouth, then closed it when I realized I didn't have an answer ready. What did I want?

I felt a twinge of sadness as I thought about my father and the guidance that he gave me, whether I wanted it or not. I considered my loving mother who'd supported me going into the army when she knew the risks. My older brother who'd been equal parts friend and nemesis. I was used to not seeing them for extended periods of time, but the thought of never seeing them again was different.

And it wasn't only my own feelings I had to take into consideration. I didn’t know if I could leave them without answers. Without a goodbye. They were probably worried sick. If time was moving the same here as there, I'd been gone for almost a month. I didn't know what answers they had, but I knew they wouldn't be enough.

The honest answer was that I didn’t know whether I wanted to go home or not, but I did know that I didn't want to lose Gracen. Could I choose him over my parents and brother? Over my military friends Wilkins and Rogers?

“If you wish it,” he said quietly, “I will do everything in my power to see you safely home.”

I could hear the effort it took to speak those words, see the pain in his eyes, and I knew in that moment that he loved me more than Bruce ever had. What I wanted, what I needed, was more important to Gracen than anything else.

“We will explore all possible sources of information,” he continued, clearly taking my hesitation as an answer. The only hint at the inner turmoil he was feeling was how tightly his hands were clenched. “Some of the servants may have mystical knowledge.”

“I spoke to Dye before I left,” I said almost absently, “and she said she didn’t know anything.”

I couldn't waver. Not now. This was the moment where my life would take one path or another. I couldn't say how I knew it, only that I did know, deep in my bones. I could no longer leave it all on chance. I had to decide whether or not to actively pursue finding a way to get back to my time. And I knew that no matter what I chose, I would lose people I loved.

I knew what I truly wanted, even if I hadn't wanted to accept it until now.

“I love my family, and I miss them–” I started.

“Then we will search for a way home for you,” he cut me off. He was all business now, unable to look at me, unwilling to show his pain.

“Let me finish,” I said gently. He nodded, the muscles in his jaw clenching. “I love my family, and I miss them...but I can live without them.” He inhaled sharply but didn't interrupt. “I can't live without you. I don't want to. I don’t understand what happened to me, and I don’t know if it is permanent or temporary, but whatever control I have, I choose you.”

The relief I felt was immense but not enough to completely overshadow my sadness at the loss of those I loved in my own time. I could survive that grief though. I didn't think I could survive leaving Gracen behind. And I knew that my family would understand. They would want me to be happy. And Gracen made me happy.

I apparently made him happy too because the moment the last word left my mouth, he picked me up, swinging me around. His lips were on mine almost instantly, hard and desperate, telling me without words just how badly the thought of losing me had scared him. I met his kiss with equal fervor, determined to make him understand that my need for him was as strong as his for me.

As he set me on my feet, his hands moved to the small of my back, pulling me closer, pressing our bodies together until I could feel him hard against my hip. His fingers moved up my back, over the outline of my tattoo under my shirt, reminding me that there were no more secrets between us. Whatever obstacles remained between now and our happy ending, we would face them together.

He pulled away, and although he was breathing heavily, he was clearly stopping us from going any further. My body was protesting, but my brain knew it was probably a good idea. Getting caught up in things might have felt really good, but we did have some other plans we needed to discuss before things got any more heated.

“What do we do now?” I asked as I clung to him, not trusting my legs to hold me.

“I have an idea.”

“What's that?”

I frowned as he stepped away from me and then gasped when he went down to one knee.

He had to be joking...right?

He took my hand between his and squeezed. “Honor Daviot, would you do me the great honor of agreeing to become my wife?”

Shit. He wasn't kidding.