Chapter 47
The weeks crawled by miserably, and the air of gloom that hung around her didn’t lighten.
College and her studies kept her busy, as did her jobs on the side. Savannah had asked her to babysit Jacob a few times lately, which was a good thing because she no longer worked for Xavier anymore.
It had taken one short email to let Xavier know she couldn’t work for him any longer, and to her surprise he had accepted her reason and told her he understood. In the beginning, he had sent her emails and messages, had even left long, rambling voicemails for her when she refused to answer his calls. But she had purposely ignored all his attempts to get in touch.
She didn’t want to hear more excuses and lies. She didn’t want to be duped again.
A consequence of severing all her ties to him was that she missed the extra money, and what she had earned from him was a generous amount. His work had been simple enough to do, and she had been hoping to ditch the online courses guy whose work demands were getting ridiculous. She would go weeks without anything from him, and then he would want a heap of stuff done within a day or two. She’d had to pull all-nighters a few times in order to get his work done. It had been hard, and her studies had suffered, and the man was a pig. Demanding and rude. She’d been hoping to ditch him, but with Xavier’s work gone, her choices were limited.
There were times when she now looked back and examined everything Xavier had given her, and wondered if he had ever really needed any of the reports and charts which she had put together for him. He’d owned up to his little lie about the bar charts, and now she questioned everything he’d ever told her about his VAs. It drove the knife deeper, to know how much he had conned his way into getting her to work for him.
This weekend she was taking Jacob out for the day again. A movie and some pizza, Savannah had said. She made her way to the Upper East Side once more and hoped she wouldn’t run into Xavier.
Everything about looking after Jacob was linked to Xavier in some small way, and it was painful, trying to erase him from her mind when there were snippets of conversation, or reminders of him everywhere. Looking after Jacob meant having a continual link to Xavier.
When she arrived, Tobias told her that Savannah was in the pool. Relieved to not have to wait in the apartment, she made her way downstairs and sat on one of the recliners by the pool.
Savannah finished swimming her length and climbed out of the water, smiling when she saw her. Izzy stared at her curvy figure, and at the baby bump which was now so noticeable.
“I must have been in the water longer than I thought,” said Savannah, grabbing a towel and sitting.
“No, it’s me. I’m early,” Izzy explained. “I had to escape my over-excited roommate.”
Savannah looked at her expectantly. “Escape?”
She explained that Cara was going away with friends to Cancun, and how she didn’t want to.
“Why didn’t you want to go?”
Because she was feeling miserable and preferred not to be surrounded by a group of happy people. It was the weekend she would have been free to go to The Hamptons, with Xavier, only she’d never gotten around to telling him.
“I wanted to stay behind and study,” she told Savannah, instead.
“You’re a bright girl, Izzy. You need to take a break sometimes, have fun, and not be cooped up inside all the time.”
“I’m having a break today,” she replied. “Jacob and I are going to be out all day, and we’re going to have fun.”
“Jacob’s looking forward to it. He said there’s a new Marvel movie out.” She put the towel on her lap. “Is it me, or is there always a new Marvel movie coming out?”
Izzy grinned. “It’s not you. There’s always a Marvel movie coming out.”
“At least it will keep Jacob entertained, and I need him to be busy, especially now that we are finally going to be moving.”
“You’re finally moving?” She’d heard Savannah talking about the new place Tobias had bought, and how he seemed to be getting carried away with its refurbishment.
“It should be done by Easter time, I hope.” Savannah made a groaning sound. “I need it done by then, because…” she rubbed her swollen belly. “I’m going to have to start preparing for the birth.”
“You’ll have your hands doubly full.” The news about the twins had broken recently in the press, angering both Savannah and Tobias in the process.
“And I thought last year was crazy.”
Izzy didn’t want to imagine what sort of a crazy life Savannah now led. “Don’t worry about me,” she said, making herself comfortable on the recliner. “You go ahead and finish off your pool lengths. I’ll wait.” Easier to wait down here, where there was no danger of Xavier turning up.
“I think you might be waiting longer than planned. Tobias called to say they got sidetracked. He took Jacob out on the scooter this morning, but somehow they’ve ended up in a Ferrari showroom.
“I can see how that might happen,” replied Izzy. Knowing Tobias, it was completely understandable.”
“Jacob’s fascinated by Xavier’s car.”
Izzy nodded. Her mouth tightening at the sound of his name.
“Tobias took to heart what you and Xavier had said, about Jacob feeling left out. We’ve both been making a real fuss of him ever since. Has Jacob said anything else to you?” Savannah asked.
“No. He seems pretty happy to me these days.”
“Tobias loves Jacob as his own, even I can see it, but I know my boy, and I know what he’s been through. I know he’s afraid of losing Tobias’s love, and that’s simply not the case, but it can be so hard trying to make a child see that.”
“Yes, it is, but you’ve done all the right things,” Izzy replied, hoping to reassure Savannah.
“Unfortunately, Tobias doesn’t always get things right.”
“No?”
“I mean, with Xavier.”
Another jab at another mention of his name. “No, he doesn’t,” she replied, carefully, forcing herself to think about the topic at hand, and not what had happened between the two of them.
She thought back to the things Xavier had told her, and of the way Tobias often placed the blame on him. “I used to feel sorry for Xavier.”
Savannah peered at her. “Used to?”
She brushed her bangs out of the way. “I—I …”
She wasn’t sure how much Savannah knew. Wasn’t sure how much Xavier would have told them, and wasn’t sure, now that she thought about it, that there had been anything worth telling in the first place. “I don’t work for him anymore.”
“Oh,” said Savannah in a voice which indicated total surprise. “I know he was going to find you some work. I hadn’t realized you were still doing it.”
“I did some work for him, before,” she replied. There had been nothing seedy in it, but it felt suddenly felt clandestine. “He gave me a few hours here and there, but I stopped a few weeks ago.” She turned away, and coughed. She still had his MacBook Pro and had been meaning to drop it back to him.
It was a daily, constant reminder of him, lying in her bedroom, on one of her bookshelves. She no longer used it, and had reverted back to her slow and clunky laptop in the hopes of forgetting him and putting him out of her head, and her heart.
Because she had her weak moments, now that the initial burst of rage had passed. In those moments lay the reminders of what they had once shared, of what she had started to feel for him. It went beyond the lust, and the way he made her feel, physically, and emotionally, and all the other ways in between.
She dared, in those moments, to think that might have been something between them.
“A few weeks ago?” Savannah asked, in a way that indicated there was more to the question.
Izzy nodded.
“This is news to me,” confessed Savannah.
“It’s old news now, and not as exciting as your news. Jacob is so excited, he can’t stop talking about the twins. How are you doing?”
“Nervous, excited, ecstatic.” Savannah’s eyes glistened. “As for Tobias, he’s been more guarded. I would even go so far as to say that’s he’s been more grumpy lately, and that’s because there’s a lot going on that I’m not always privy to. He’s annoyed that the twins news broke before we were ready.”
“I don’t blame him.” Izzy had seen first hand how intensely private Tobias was about personal matters.
“He tries to shield me from most things,” said Savannah, stroking her stomach, “but he also has an annoying tendency to go inward. And while I understand his anger over the news breaking, I think he’s taking the whole argument with Xavier too far.”
“They had another argument?”
Savannah looked puzzled. “Another one? I can’t keep track. They’re talking now, though. They argued recently about the twin’s news being leaked. Xavier owned up and apologized, saying he might have—in his excitement—mentioned something to someone during a meeting, and that was how word got out.”
“That’s what he told you?”
“That’s what he told Tobias, and he apologized and they made up. You know what men are like. They’re hardly going to go out for a coffee and talk things over. I like it when things are calm, when there are no arguments. His parents do as well.”
“His parents got involved?”
“Millicent, his mother, was a mess,” Savannah recalled. “I knew something was wrong when she turned up here not wearing pearls, or a Chanel number.”
Izzy let out a smile. That sounded like Xavier’s mother, from what she remembered of her. She couldn’t imagine what it would be like having someone like Millicent Stone as a mother-in-law.
From what Savannah had told her, she seemed to handle her just fine. “She turned up here because the boys were arguing?” Izzy asked.
“She wanted me to fix it.”
“How?”
“You tell me. I had no idea, especially since, at that time I had no idea that Xavier had accidentally spilled the news about the twins.”
Izzy jolted to attention. This didn’t sound right. This wasn’t what had happened. And Xavier had taken the blame for something he didn’t do, and she couldn’t sit by and say nothing.
“Xavier didn’t tell anyone about the twins.”
Savannah’s eyes narrowed. “How do you know?”
“Because …” Izzy took a deep breath, knowing that what she had were only suspicions. “He’s covering up for someone he wants to protect.”
Savannah let out a choked laugh. “I don’t understand. We only told family, his and mine. I hadn’t even told you.”
“It’s not me he’s protecting.”
Savannah blinked, and those green irises stared back at her, making her hesitate. Some mothers couldn’t take the discovery that their children might have done something wrong, even by accident. Even though Izzy had a feeling that Savannah wasn’t one of those women, it didn’t make telling her any easier.
“Then who?”
“I suspect it might have been Jacob, but I don’t think he would have done it intentionally.”
“Jacob?”
Izzy could tell this was the last thing she’d expected to hear. “Please don’t tell him off,” she urged. “I don’t know what happened when Jacob was growing up, but I can tell that he gets scared easily. He doesn’t like shouting and swearing, and—”
“And any kind of confrontation,” Savannah finished the sentence for her, and nodded her head, agreeing. “I won’t tell him off. I would never, but, I’m surprised.” And then her features relaxed. “Though I should have known better. Keeping this a secret must have been impossible, given how ecstatic he’s been.”
“He didn’t tell us. He let it slip once when we were at the fairground.”
“The fairground?” Savannah asked, “When you and Xavier took him?” She gave Izzy a peculiar look, as if she was slowly piecing things together.
“Then you’ll recall he came home with those two huge plush monkeys?”
Savannah nodded.
“Jacob wanted to win them. He wanted identical cuddly toys, and we didn’t understand it until he let it slip. He didn’t say it outright, but he let it slip and then he stopped himself. I didn’t tell anyone, and I know Xavier wouldn’t have. We barely discussed it in all the time we were together. I mean, in all the time I worked for him.” Heat rushed to her cheeks, and she looked down, making herself focus on her cell phone in order to avoid looking at Savannah.
“I can believe it,” Savannah said, in the silence that followed. “He wouldn’t be able to keep something like that in, at least not with people he felt so comfortable with.”
Izzy lifted her face. “So, you see. I don’t think any of this news being leaked was Xavier’s doing. Xavier looks up to Tobias, he thinks the world of him, at least, that’s the impression I get.”
“I’ve seen that as well.” Savannah rubbed her forehead. “Xavier’s lying to protect Jacob.”
Izzy nodded. “If Jacob let it slip to me and Xavier that easily, he might also have let it slip to one of his friends at school.”
“Lenny,” Savannah murmured, placing her hand flat on her forehead. “Julia mentioned something once, and my bump wasn’t even showing that much. I think you might be right. Once it gets out in the school, I have enough school moms who wouldn’t think twice about letting the news out.”
“We still don’t know for sure, and I would hate for Jacob to get told off.”
“Tobias would never shout at Jacob, but maybe we expected too much, thinking he could keep the secret. I should have known the excitement of twins, and boys at that, would be too much for him to contain.”
“I didn’t want Xavier to get the blame for something he hadn’t done.”
“You still care for him.” Savannah stated, not asking, or probing.
“I believe in doing the right thing.”