The feeling of his warmth beside her was so soothing that the fears that had been bubbling in her gut all day eased away. Polly snuggled deeper into his arm. She loved the smoky smell that surrounded him. It was sharper than around Shane or Tyler and smelled so homey. Like Applewood smoked bacon, a treat she still couldn’t resist when it was offered to her.
“What part do you play in your clan?”
She looked up at him to see his gaze distant. “My part? Well… I’m from Belize. My family was adopted into the clan something like a hundred years ago. We originally were Mennonites,” he added. “Not really sure how everything happened, just that my great-great-grandfather shifted when he was a very young boy and the local clan took him in. We’re not sure if his parents were shifters, too, or if his mother had a fling with a dragon. In any case, he was taken in. And me? Well, I was trained from a very young age to be part of the king’s guard.”
“King’s guard?”
“Yeah. We’re a dedicated group meant to protect the king.”
Polly didn’t want to pull away, but she had to in order to get a proper look at his face. She frowned. “If you’re supposed to be protecting the king, what are you doing out here? This is a heck of a long way from Belize.”
Gilbert half-smiled at that, though he looked a little… nervous. “I was sent to research ways to try to save him from a genetic disease.”
Polly nodded. She remembered him telling her about that.
“It’s my job to protect the king by saving him from what we can’t fight. My billions, it was all given to me by the clan to fund my research. And I realized that it wasn’t going to work out like that, it was going to cost a heck of a lot more, so I started building funding as well for the research. Now I wish I had focused just on research… my king is dying, and I don’t have what I need to save him.”
She saw the stress lines on his face and squeezed his hand. It must be horrible, to have something like that hanging over his head constantly. Her gaze sharpened as she considered it. “It’s not your fault.”
“I don’t know if it is or isn’t. But there isn’t anything to be done about it now, unfortunately.” Gilbert’s eyes darkened for a moment.
Seeing his dedication to something so important made Polly’s heart stutter. She had always thought he was handsome, but whenever she considered how patient and gentle he was with people… it made every bit of her ache for him. She looked away—she knew that nothing could happen between them. It didn’t matter if her body was on fire right at this moment, wanting to grab him and roll him back onto the bed. It couldn’t happen.
She wanted her first to be her forever. And that simply wasn’t going to be the case with Gilbert. They were just too different. For one thing, sooner or later he was going to go back to Belize…
“Polly…” Her name was whispered from his tongue like a prayer. When she looked at him again, she was shocked to see the fire in his eyes. So much desire there that it took her breath away.
Something tightened inside of her. She felt everything twist tighter, a heat building in her core. Her heart rate increased as she leaned forward. It was half unconscious, half thinking that a single kiss wasn’t a contract for forever. His hands slipped around her waist as he bent.
Their lips brushed, sending a tingling sensation throughout her mouth. Something fluttered in her chest and she found herself launching herself at him all-out. He apparently hadn’t been expecting the attack, because the next thing she knew they were on the bed. His hands roamed her hungrily, like a starving man finally eating a feast. Their kisses grew deeper; she thrust her tongue into his mouth and he responded. Heat spread through every inch of her body. The tightness inside increased, and she found herself grinding against him. A short laugh of surprise and delight escaped her as she felt him harden against her core.
How easy it would be just to remove this barrier of clothing, to have what they both clearly wanted…
His hands slid under his shirt, cupping her breasts, but he suddenly stopped. He twisted his head breaking the kiss. Polly leaned back enough to put space between their faces. She trembled over him, wanting more, never wanting to stop. But as she stared into his eyes, her convictions came back to her.
Slowly, hating that she had to choose between this moment and the forever she wanted, Polly eased back. She swallowed hard as she looked away.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I didn’t mean to…”
“Don’t be sorry. I’ve been wanting to do that for years.” Gilbert sat up and ran a hand through his hair. He gave her a half-shy, half-apologetic smile. “That and much, much more. It’s just… well, circumstances.”
Most dragons believed that the first person they had sex with was their one true mate, their forever person. And if they weren’t, then having sex with someone who wasn’t their own true mate ruined them for said mate. Polly licked her lips. She knew that Gilbert didn’t believe that, at least not fully, but it was a pretty difficult thing to just ignore.
And besides, they were friends. To take this leap… would it ruin what they had? He’s been after you for years.
No, he hasn’t. He had feelings, she knew that, but he had never acted on them. That meant that he had reservations, too. Ones that weren’t just going to go away because they had kissed once. It wasn’t something that they could just ignore.
Gilbert took her hand, and even that simple act sent shivers up her spine. “Hey, I’m sorry.”
“Sorry?” Polly gave him a startled look. “For what?”
He shrugged, not looking at her now. “I know that you don’t want to get involved with anybody right now. It’s just the circumstances that made you kiss me.”
Wait, what? “Is that why you’ve never asked me out?”
Gilbert gave her a surprised look.
“Despite what Tyler thinks, I know that you’ve been crushing on me. For years,” she added. “And yeah, there were times when I knew that it wasn’t the right time, but I did try to keep that open. I thought that… since you didn’t ask me, there was a reason for that. Something. I don’t know. Just something.”
A deep laugh escaped him. He shook his head. “No. No reason. Other than I was worried about what might happen if I crossed that line. Your friendship is far more important to me than anything else, Polly. I’d rather be your friend and have you in my life than to try something and it not work, and then have to break up. I…”
She eased herself closer. “You what?”
“I know that you want your first to be your only.” His face turned bright red as he looked away. He fidgeted before glancing up at her again. “I overheard you telling somebody once. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but…”
“It’s fine.” She bit her lip as she inched closer again. “But I guess that depends on what you consider losing your virginity. Is it any sexual activity, or is it specifically all-out sex? Does it have to include penetration?”
Gilbert’s eyes darkened with lust again. His hand coasted up the curve of her hip, almost unconsciously. “Well… the dragons I’ve talked with, who believe that mates and sex are interconnected, seem to think that if there is a man involved, it has to include penetration… two women are a different case, but that’s hardly relevant to you and me, is it?”
Her heart started pounding again and this time she slipped through his hands and grasped the front of his jeans. “Oral sex doesn’t count.”
She started to undo his jeans when he caught her lips. Desire was hot in his eyes, but he licked his lips and shook his head.
“Are you certain? I don’t want you to do anything that you will regret in the morning.”
At that moment, she had never been more certain about anything. Maybe it was moving a little fast, but she didn’t care. She wanted him. He wanted her. And who was to say that their friendship couldn’t blossom into forever love?
“I want this,” she whispered. He released her wrists, and she undid his jeans.
He lifted himself up so that she could pull the jeans down to his knees. He sat there half-hard already and Polly had to stifle a moan in her throat. Excitement and desire coursed through her; there was a fire in her core that only flared brighter when she took him in her hand. She stroked him softly and looked up into his eyes to give him a half-smile.
He smiled back at her, and she took him into her mouth. A tremor of nerves went through her as she started to suck gently; she’d never done this before, and didn’t know if he was going to enjoy it… She shouldn’t have worried, though. His head fell back and a deep groan released in a shuddering breath. Polly grinned as she continued what she was doing. His fingers twisted into her tight curls, applying a gentle pressure to the back of her head.
Polly ran her hands over his legs, her fingertips brushing over the tense muscles there. When she got to his thighs, he bucked his hips upwards. The movement pushed him deeper and she jerked back in surprise. She took a break, using her hand on him. He was hard, thick and trembling. When she looked up at him, she saw his eyes dark with lust, jaw clenched as a look of fierce determination twisted his face.
“Do you want me to swallow?” she whispered, remembering that line from one of her favorite romances.
In the book, the hero had groaned, told his lover yes, and had erupted almost at once. Gilbert gave a little whine. He nodded and moved his hands to clench into the bedspread. Words were seemingly beyond him. Polly bent over him again. She continued to work at him until the muscles beneath her hands stiffened. With a little cry, Gilbert fell back, jerking his hips. Polly found it difficult to keep her mouth where it needed to be.
When he was finished, she licked her lips and rubbed her hands on her thighs. Gilbert panted on the bed and she stood. Her clothes were too much, so she removed them before going into the attached en-suite bathroom to rinse out her mouth. When she returned, Gilbert had pulled his underwear back up, but had removed everything else. He smiled at her as he held out his arms. She laid into his embrace, and he kissed her fiercely.
The kiss set everything on fire as he slid a hand between her legs. She parted them on instinct, slinging one over his hips. His free hand pulled her closer, breasts pressed tight against his chest, and kissed her again.
He started to run his fingers over her, exploring gently. When she shivered and let out a soft moan, he repeated the action that had elicited it. She shivered again, eyes rolling to the back of her head.
“You like that, do you?” he whispered.
“Yes.”
He did it again, this time sending a bolt of heat down her legs. She clutched at him tighter. Her fingers dug into the smooth, hard planes of his shoulders. She found his mouth again as he stoked the fire inside of her. She felt like she was about to explode, everything far too tight inside of her.
“Do you want me to do this with my tongue?” he growled into her ear as he moved to start kissing her neck.
“No.”
Gilbert pulled back, surprise on his face.
“I want your body against mine. You kissing me while I…”
She trailed off, not wanting to say the actual word. Gilbert didn’t need her to, though. He kissed over every inch of her body while keeping his fingers moving around their target. Soon there was nothing Polly could do but cling to him and cry out in little gasps. The fire inside consumed her, darkness rolled over her vision and her body writhed as pleasure washed over her. Gilbert held her still, kissing her again and again as she rolled her hips, riding his hand until it was too much and she had to fall still.
They fell back with groans. Polly panted, her fingers still digging into Gilbert’s arms. A small smile broke across her face as she turned to gaze into his eyes. He smiled back at her, arms tight around her waist. She’d never felt so warm and safe before… she snuggled closer into his arms, not wanting to think about anything except how warm he was.