.
He was going to propose.
Or, at the least, ask to court her, which would have one day led to a proposal if only…
Alex had seen it in his eyes, and her entire body had been wound tightly up as she waited for it, waited for a man as beautiful as he was to finally choose her over all else, over every better option that there was in London and beyond.
She picked up her pace as she walked farther down the road, struggling to breathe around her trembling heart.
She’d not been the idiot Reuben had claimed her to be. Justin felt more than lust for her. He'd been willing to seal his life with hers after knowing one another for less than a day but had changed his mind in the face of what it would mean to be married to her.
She couldn’t even be compromised.
She wasn’t a lady.
Kissing an earl did nothing but make her a lightskirt.
And that was the worst of it. She couldn’t be compromised. She had no value. No worth. She was an orphan. No one wanted her, yet for a moment, Justin had.
She might always hate his sisters for what they’d stolen from her, though she knew it wasn’t truly their fault.
Eventually, probably by the time Alex had been presented to the ton, Justin would have changed his mind. Why he thought he could marry her off, or that any other lord would want her, was beyond her comprehension.
She stopped when she came to the end of a busy street and wondered where to go. There was no place safe for her anymore. Justin knew where she lived. She just wanted to get away.
A hand touched her shoulder. She jumped and spun around, ready to see Justin.
Instead, it was Nash. Both relief and disappointment hit her equally.
Nash looked her over and whatever he saw made his nose flare and forced his lips into a thin line.
She felt her eyes begin to burn with the first stirring of tears.
“Come on,” he whispered and took her arm to lead her down another road. Her feet tripped on the concrete, and she avoided eyes by concentrating on her next steps. She didn’t know where they were going and decided not to use the last of her strength to ask. If she opened her mouth, she would start crying, so she remained silent.
He made it to the next corner and found a hack, giving it directions as they both climbed in.
Alex leaned into a corner and closed her eyes, waiting for yet another series of either questions or comments like Reuben tended to do.
But this was not Reuben.
This was Nash, and Nash rarely spoke about personal issues.
Alex suspected it was because Nash didn’t wish to speak about himself.
He hadn’t always been that way but had become that way around the time his body had started to fill out, his muscles growing to match his height. He’d been a young man when he’d stopped telling Alex about his day. Out of all her brothers Nash had always been the most open, but now, even compared to Chris, he was the most closemouthed.
Still, he smiled and laughed, and Alex decided to accept him for what he’d become.
She opened her eyes and found his crystal blue ones holding steady on her.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“Where do you want to go?” he countered.
She smiled and closed her eyes. “Scotland. I hear it’s lovely during the summer.”
“Scotland it is then.”
She opened her eyes again and found him still staring at her without humor. He was serious. He would take her to Scotland if she truly wanted to go.
She righted herself. “We can’t go to Scotland. I have to work at the store and there is also the children’s musical presentation.”
“Rose can always take over the presentation, and Chris believes it best you stay away from the toy store until this is over.”
She’d feared her brother would say that about her work at the toy store but knew it to be the right thing to do. Her presence would only fill the store with people who had no interest in the merchandise.
“Don’t you have to work?” she asked. “Surely, His Grace will need you as his banker.” Nash worked for His Grace, the Duke of Iverstone at a boxing club on Bond Street, instructing wealthy patrons and others on the skills they would need to become champions. During matches, which were always held outside of London, Nash became the banker, the man who held and counted the money until the end.
Alex had been amazed when she’d discovered just how much money was wagered during a match. Two thousand pounds, which was six times what a gentleman needed to live comfortably.
Alex knew Lord Iverstone, an aging Scottish gentleman with a fair temper, counted on Nash. There were times when Nash was there and then in a blink, he was gone.
He leaned forward, placing his arms on his knees, and Alex’s eyes were drawn to his hands. Small abrasions marred them. The knuckles were red. “I could leave for a few days. Besides, Iverstone might allow us to stay at his estate.”
That made the offer even more tempting. She’d met Iverstone a few times and thought him an exception to the rule of how she saw the other peers. He was friendly and always spoke highly of his homeland, a lush paradise with hills and mountains that had yet to be ruined by man.
“Scotland is a week away.” She pulled her gaze from his hands to his face just as he pulled her mind back from its venture to places unknown.
“I could leave for a few weeks,” he replied with softer eyes.
He was devastatingly handsome and larger than any man she knew except for Lord Iverstone and his sons. Chris was taller, and Reuben matched Nash in height, but where Reuben and Chris’ muscles were lean, Nash’s were not. He was built like a fighter and when people saw him with Lord Iverstone’s son, they assumed Nash held Scottish heritage as well. Alex wondered if that were true.
His hair was an odd color, brown with a hint of red. A dash of freckles had shone themselves one summer years ago. Alex would never forget them, but now they were faint enough that she only noticed them because she knew they were there. He was a great friend to her. Though they thought of one another as family, had she been a lady, she’d not have been allowed to ride in a hack alone with him or her actions would have been considered distasteful.
Nash was not only easy on the eyes but also a criminal who’d spent three years in Newgate for theft until Lord Iverstone had taken him out and given him work. Had Alex been legitimate, the ton would be in unrest for years.
Instead, she was simply a woman alone with a man in a hack and no one cared.
A tear slid down her cheek. She brushed it away, but not before Nash’s gaze followed its trail from her eye. Then his gaze returned to hers. “Are those tears for the earl?” His voice was low and tight.
“No.” She straightened further and shook her head. “No. It was his sisters. They… were not kind to me.” She usually didn’t have to explain herself with Nash but fear prompted her to speak.
The fear of Justin’s legs being broken.
Nash leaned back and crossed his arms. “Don’t believe anything those women said. They’re likely jealous of you.”
Alex blinked. “You were listening?”
He looked offended. “Yes, I heard it all.”
She momentarily wondered if she’d survive jumping from the hack. “His sisters can’t be jealous of me. They are his sisters.”
“Would you like me to tell you what we know about Lord Chantenny?”
She didn’t have to guess who ‘we’ were. It was obviously him, Chris, and Reuben. She shook her head. “I can’t believe you were listening.”
He lifted a dark brow. “Do you truly believe we’d actually leave you alone with him?”
She had. The moment Chris had left the room, she’d thought she and Justin were alone. The knowledge that her brothers thought her worth looking after made her laugh then burst into tears.
Nash crossed to her side of the carriage and pulled Alex into his arms. “You handled Lord Chantenny’s sisters very nicely. I always do enjoy when you put people in their place.”
She laughed at his words. “I lived with Michael in sin,” she eventually managed to whisper. “I’m not a virgin. There’s nothing to protect anymore.” She braved to look in his eyes and was not surprised to see a lack of judgment. Still, it warmed her.
Nash wiped the tears from her cheeks. “You’re worth protecting and so much more. We should have never allowed you to live with a vile man like Michael, but you knew what you wanted, and we didn’t want you resenting us if we stopped you. You were in love.”
She nodded. “I thought he’d marry me.” She’d also believed that Justin would as well. A small part of her had envisioned her life playing out on the grand stage of London like a fairytale.
And then he’d almost asked to court her.
After he’d kissed her.
She stiffened. “Did you see when Lord Chantenny and I…”
“No,” Nash said. “I was simply listening on the other side of the door.”
She sighed with relief.
Nash slid an arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. “Of course, he’ll have to pay a toll before he can even so much as speak to you again.”
Alex had just laid her head down but lifted it back up at those words. “A toll?”
His eyes were fixed on hers. “When I say I heard everything, I mean that I heard everything. I know what he was about to say before his sisters’ untimely arrival.”
She lowered her head as heat stung her cheeks. Hearing him propose would have been one thing. Half a proposal was another.
Nash however, did not allow her to remain in her shame. He was in the mood to speak and lifted her face by the chin until their gazes met once more. “The brothers have decided to look after you more carefully this time. Chantenny will not have another go at hurting you.”
“You’re right,” Alex agreed. “Because after what his sisters so rightly pointed out, I’m beneath him.”
“Not true.” His expression became hard. “You’d make a wonderful countess.”
Alex smiled sadly and whispered, “Well, for that to happen it will most definitely have to be another earl to propose, because surely Justin will not again.”
Nash’s lips twitched before he chuckled. “Alexandra, a man proposed to you after knowing you for less than a day.”
“Half a proposal,” she corrected.
“Still,” he laughed. “How many ladies do you think have waited years to hear the words you heard in a day?”
This time, when her cheeks warmed from embarrassment, she didn’t shy away. She didn’t lower her gaze only so she could comfortably wrap her arms about Nash and give him a hug.
“You never cease to make me feel better,” she told him truthfully. All her brothers tried to make her happy, but Nash brought with him an abundant amount of light. His gift was to make people smile. He’d been doing so since before Alex could remember.
But there was no mistaking the fact that in the presence of his sisters, Justin had let her go. She’d clung to him, even with his sisters there, but he’d let her go.
“He’ll not propose again,” she said plainly.
Nash sighed and stroked her hair. “We shall see. For now, he’ll have to get through me before he can go near you. In the meantime, we’ll prepare you for your debut into Society without his assistance.”
“How so?” She looked up to see his face.
Nash smiled. “I might know a lady or two who’d be willing.”
Actually getting trained by a lady would not change the circumstances of her birth, but they would ensure that Alex didn’t play the part of a fool when Justin finally escorted her to a ball. Meeting Justin’s sisters had been exactly what she’d needed. She’d learned and learned well. That, at least, would limit what the ton could say about her. Eventually, the gossip and Justin would all fade away like a dream.
“So, are we to remain in London?” Nash cupped her shoulder and pulled her closer.
Alex rested her head on his chest and sighed. “I’ve a scandal to live out, don’t I?”