“Do you think maybe that might sound better if it went up at the end?” I flicked my finger ceiling-ward and demonstrated my suggestion, ending lipstick stains on a higher note.

Ian followed along on his guitar, nodding as he went. “I like it.”

The two of us were hunkered down in my creatively named “Music Room.” To the delight of my neighbors (or not, in the case of any loitering super fans) the room was completely soundproof. I couldn’t even start another round of “guess that noise” with Felix even if I’d wanted to.

Ian kept playing into the next verse, adding a little flourish here and there, stopping every once in a while to change a cord. I listened to the notes and tried to let them coax the words out of me, tapping my pen incessantly against the notepad balanced against my knee. Together we co-wrote the majority of the band’s songs, though there were instances where we each came up with something all on our own. Once we had a basic idea down we’d showcase it for the guys, then work altogether from there till we had a finished product.

Normally, the words came pretty easily. My notebook was overflowing with random choruses, full songs that’d never made it past a piece of paper. Today, my mind was on another planet and I had to battle for every word. With the way I’d been struggling for the last two hours it was amazing my fingertips were only stained with ink and not blood.

I glanced over at Ian from where I was lounging on the leather sofa, the soft black fabric sticking to my cheek. “You ever been to a place called Studen’s?”

He let the last series of notes echo around the belly of his guitar before answering. “Never heard of it. Why?”

I twisted my face into the most nonchalant expression I could manage. “No reason. Just having dinner with a friend there tonight and all she gave me was the address.”

He lay his guitar down. “The redhead from the bar?”

“Felix told you.”

“Bianca, actually.”

“Who the hell told her?” I shoved up to sitting and tossed my notebook onto the coffee table. It slapped the shiny surface and slid toward the edge, coming to a stop inches before falling to its doom.

“Rachel, I think.” He shrugged.

If I mentally followed the trail backward I’d have to guess that Jules told Rachel who told Bianca. Those three ladies were wildly different and yet they’d all become close friends somehow. With their combined talents—award-winning actress, super hacker, power attorney—they were a fearsome threesome.

I folded my hands behind my head and leaned back into the cushion. “It’s not a big deal.”

Ian copied my pose in his recliner. “It never is with you.”

“Thank you.” I blew out a breath. “You’re the only one who actually believes it.”

“Well, I believe that you believe it.” The corner of his mouth tipped up. “Then again I convinced myself of the same exact thing when I started things up with Bianca.”

I made a face and pushed off the couch, stalking toward the windows. “C’mon, you can’t actually compare what happened with you and Bianca with this.”

He scratched his fingers along the edge of his jaw. “Guy and girl who are both determined to keep things casual. Girl who doesn’t plan to stick around long. Guy who’s adamant he can ignore his feelings.”

I waved a hand through the air. Okay, so on the surface it maybe sounded a little bit similar. Just a bit. And I wasn’t even going to touch on his flat-out insinuation that such feelings even existed. “With Bianca there was always a certain amount of wiggle room. She was just heading back to Texas for a job. With Dani, it’s not a question, it’s a definite. She is leaving and there’s nothing that’s going to change that. Certainly not me.” I lifted one shoulder in a half shrug. I’d already figured out before that I wasn’t enough to make her stick around. “I’m not expecting any type of fairytale twist here.”

“Expecting and hoping are two different things.”

“Trust me, there’s no hope here.”

And if that wasn’t hellishly depressing I didn’t know what was. I fended off a grimace and didn’t dare glance at Ian to catch whatever pitying look he might be throwing my way. I didn’t need pity. There was nothing to pity. I knew what I was signing up for. Just because the love bug had bitten half of our mighty foursome didn’t mean I was looking to get stung.

Ian stretched his jean-clad legs out, crossing his feet at his ankles. “What’s her deal anyway? The whole moving around thing?”

“No clue.” I slipped my hands into my pockets. “She’s not sharing.”

His eyes narrowed. “You think she’s tangled up in something illegal?”

Hell if I knew. I’d considered about a thousand different scenarios that involved her being constantly on the move, in danger or involved with dangerous things, and locking away secrets tighter than a prisoner in Guantánamo Bay. Needless to say, none of those guesses were anything all that bright and cheery.

I offered him another shrug in answer.

“You know, Rachel could always look into her. I’m sure—”

“No.” I took a step toward him, tried to reel back my knee-jerk reaction. When I pushed her for answers the other day I’d seen that look in her eyes. The one that was basically a neon sign flashing, I’ve gotta get out of here! I wanted answers, but not enough to send her running again. Just because I knew her leaving was inevitable didn’t mean I wanted to speed up her departure date. “It’s not my place to go digging.”

He flicked a hand at me. “Forget I mentioned it.”

I found my way back to the couch and spun the open bag of Doritos back in my direction. “So, now that we’ve covered that, why don’t you tell me what’s going on in the land of Ian? Getting tired of having to put the toilet seat down? Annoyed that Bianca puts the toilet paper roll on upside down?”

He snatched the bag of Doritos off the table. “There’s no right way to put on a roll of toilet paper.”

“Is that what you tell her?”

He shot me a nasty look and I couldn’t help but laugh. Licking cheesy red powder off my thumb I said, “Just wait, another couple months and that newlywed feeling from living together for the first time will completely fade.”

If I hadn’t been looking at him I would have missed the way he tensed at the word “newlywed.” But I was looking, so I didn’t miss it. Part of me wanted to kick myself for so carelessly throwing that word out there, but the other wasn’t above a little prodding.

I picked up my bottle of Poland Spring and rolled it between my palms. “How long have you and B been together now? A year?”

“Almost two.”

The crinkling of the plastic water bottle was the only sound between us now. “You thinking about following in Felix’s footsteps?” I cringed. “Metaphorically speaking?”

Ian’s thumb absentmindedly rubbed over the image of a hummingbird tattooed on his wrist. He probably didn’t even notice he was doing it, but knowing the significance of that particular tattoo, it was impossible to miss.

“Do you ever . . .” His gaze zeroed out into the distance. “Do you think a person can be too happy?”

“Too happy?” I chuckled. “No, sorry. I don’t think we have some cosmic overlord that’s looking down on us, smiting us when we’re happy.”

He shook his head, entirely lost in his thoughts. In fact, I wasn’t quite sure he’d heard me at all. “First my dad, then Maggie.” He scrubbed a hand over his face and finally met my gaze. “I know it sounds fucking ridiculous, but every time I start just letting myself be happy, life sucker punches me. So, obviously, it’s just as fucking stupid for me to think that taking the next step with Bianca will end the same way, but . . .”

He didn’t have to finish the sentence for me to know he was thinking about how things ended with Maggie. Reliving everything that happened all over again. It’d been dark days afterward.

“But.” I clapped a hand on his shoulder. “Then again, what if you don’t do it and bad things happen anyway?” A smile flitted across my face and I swallowed down my laugh. “So, do you want to go to Hogwarts with me, or not?”