KIWI

I keep looking over my shoulder as I walk back to my house. I don’t know what possessed me to come over here, but I did and I’m not sure I’m happy about it. I heard a bike fire up close to the house. At first I thought someone was stealing mine. By the time I got to the living room, there wasn’t anything to see. Something about it sent me out the door and down the street.

Those fucktards. “God,” I groan in frustration as I get closer to my house. Tears of frustration well in my eyes, making it hard to see where I’m going. I want to punch something, anything. I don’t care. I’m so fucking pissed off at both of them, when I should be happy.

I got Loki back.

My brother is alive.

And yet I want to shoot both of them.

I open the front door and Piper is sitting on the couch, cartoons on the television. She looks at me and greets, “Hi, mommy.”

All my anger, frustration and the pain I feel at the two idiots down the street melts away. “Hi, baby. Whatcha watchin’?” I ask.

“Cartoons,” she smiles and turns back to the TV.

“Where’s Em?”

“In the shower,” she says without looking away from her show.

I move around the couch and sit next to her. She snuggles into me and we watch the rest of the show, then the next and the next one after that before I finally come out of my haze of disbelief. Piper should have gone to school but she fell asleep in my lap and I let her stay home.

Of all the people in my life I expected to hurt me, Kellen certainly wasn’t one of them. When he died, yes, it hurt, but it was acceptable because it was out of his control. But he’s not dead,. He’s alive and he didn’t trust me with his secret and that hurts almost more than the day he died.

My cell rings in my room. I want to ignore it, but I scoot out from under Piper and jog down the hall. I miss the call, but see that it’s Loni and I rush to call her back.

“Hey, sorry, I didn’t get to it fast enough,” I tell her when she answers.

“No worries,” I hear a lot of bikes revving in the background.

“Where are you?”

“The clubhouse. Listen, there are a lot of people coming into town today, I can really use your help.”

I shudder. “I don’t…”

“No, no, not with that. Um, can you cook?”

I laugh into the phone, “I can.”

“Thank God, I need some help in the kitchen. We’re trying to feed a lot of Angels today and it’s gonna be impossible without some more hands to help.”

I smile into the phone as I walk down the hallway toward the living room. “I can, but I have a problem.”

“Oh, what’s that? The bar’s closed tonight and tomorrow,” she tells me, as if working is the issue.

“No, it’s not that, uh, my daughter.”

“You have a daughter?” she says, her voice raising a couple octaves at the surprise. “Sorry, I just, I had no idea.”

I smile again. “It’s okay. I gave her nanny the day off.”

“Bring her. My kids are here too. It’s not that kind of party. Promise.”

“Okay, how soon you need me?”

“You showered yet?” she laughs.

“I’ll be there in less than sixty,” I tell her.

“Thank you, Skit, you’re the best.”

“I try.”

We hang up. “Where we goin’, mommy?”

“Wanna come to work with me?” I ask her and she flies off the couch, headed for her room hollering, ‘yeah’ as she goes.

Emily comes around the corner. “You didn’t give me the day off?” she raises an eyebrow at me.

“I did now.” I wink and she smiles at me.

“Thanks,” she says and I head for my room.

I trade in my hooker heels for my most comfortable pair of boots, the ones I usually ride in. My short skirts and ripped jeans in favor of more sensible low-rise boot cuts, and my corsets for two, well-fitting tank tops, the top one is black with the Harley logo printed on it.

I do my make-up, though not as hooker-like as I do for work, but still enough to keep the real Lily buried behind the paint. I also put my contacts in and pull my hair back.

Piper comes bounding into my room. “What do you think?” she asks and twirls around.

I kneel. “Well, look at you,” I tell her and she giggles.

She’s wearing her own biker boots, only she has leggings on with a short, ruffled skirt and a t-shirt that says, ‘bad to the bone’ in pink glitter letters. It was the same kind of outfit she wore the first time she stepped foot in Boulder’s clubhouse and all the men melted like butter in her palms. She was two years old.

“What do you want to do with your hair?” I ask her.

“Nothing. I like it like this.” She smiles wide. Her face is framed in blonde ringlet curls.

“Earrings?” I ask and she lifts her hair.

“My pink ones.” She smiles.

“Well, you’re ready to go, aren’t you?”

She jumps up and down before bolting out of my room. Emily moves out of the way with Piper’s bag in her hand. “I put all her stuff in here, her tablet, some snacks and juice boxes.”

“Thank you,” I tell her softly. “I appreciate it.”

“No problem. Day off or not, I need to run some errands today. I’ll be on my cell if you need me to come get her. I’d be more than happy to.”

“Depending on how long this goes, I may have you come pick her up tonight.”

“No worries.” She smiles and turns to leave before turning back. “I hung her dress up, the black one you asked me to. It’s ready to go for tomorrow with her tights and shoes.”

I give her a sad smile. “Thank you.”

She smiles back and leaves my room so I can finish getting ready.

Another fifteen minutes and Piper is in the backseat, buckled in her booster and dancing to the music on the radio. Then when her favorite song comes on, she squeals, “my Adam,” and starts singing.

Most parents would be concerned if their five-year-old was singing ‘Sugar’ by Maroon 5, but not me. I love watching her sing and dance.

We’re both rocking out as we reach the clubhouse. The fun comes to an end as I roll down my window and turn down the volume. The guy at the gate is a prospect I haven’t seen before.

I’m about to say something when Piper lowers her window. “Hi there, handsome,” she says and the guy blushes as red as a cherry.

I bust out laughing. “Sorry,” I say through my giggles. “I’m K…” I stop myself. “Skit, I’m here to see Loni.”

The prospect, recovering from the shock of a five-year-old calling him handsome, waves us through and I park off to the side of the clubhouse.

Loni wasn’t kidding. There are way too many bikes here. One stands out among the rest of them.

I turn around, looking at Piper. “Someone’s here you’re gonna wanna see,” I tell her.

“Yeah,” she leans forward as if it’s a conspiracy, “Who?”

“Well, let’s go find out.”

I made no secret of my biker bartending career. Loni knows I came from the Boulder charter so Piper getting excited over seeing her Uncle Sticks isn’t going to be an issue. “Mommy, my door,” she says and I chuckle as I climb out and reach back, opening her door and she jumps down. “Finally,” she says deadpan as she brushes her hair off her face. I shake my head, laughing and I close our doors. She takes my hand, my eyes go toward the clubhouse and they lock on someone I’m not sure I’m ready to see just yet.

“Who’s that?” Piper asks.

“Go ask him,” I tell her and she looks at me as if I’m crazy. “It’s alright, go ask him.”

I look both ways and release her hand. She goes running toward Loki. His eyes widen momentarily as Piper bolts toward him. I shrug as if to say, you figure it out.

I follow right behind Piper and she looks up at Loki, who’s a good three and half feet taller than she is. “Who are you?” she asks him. He looks at me and I nod.

He kneels to her level. “My name’s Loki, what’s yours?” he asks. His voice is sweet, gentle and nothing like this morning.

“I’m Piper. Do I know you?” she asks him and again, Loki’s eyes meet mine.

“I’m a friend of your mom’s. Is that okay?”

“Yup,” she says then without prompting or preamble, she wraps her arms around his neck and I watch the big cut wearing biker dude turn into a puddle of goo on the ground. He wraps his arms around her and stands. “Whoa,” Piper says. Then she looks down. “That’s a long way down.” She laughs.

Loki and I join her. Loki reaches out for me and he wraps his arm over my shoulders, then kisses my forehead. “Thank you,” he whispers. I nod. I’m still pissed as fuck at him, but Piper doesn’t deserve that.

“I came to help Loni. I gave my babysitter the day off,” I lie. “Loni said to bring her.”

Loki nods in understanding.

“Mom?” I look at Piper.

“What, Pipes?”

“Is this who you said was here that I would want to see?”

I shake my head. “Nope, there’s more,” I tell her and Loki looks at me. I shake my head softly, she’ll hear. He sets her down and she goes for the door.

“Who?” he asks when she’s out of earshot.

“Sticks,” I breathe.

“He’s in the garage,” Loki says quietly

I follow after Piper. She’s trying to open the door. “Not there, baby, come here,” I tell her and she steps aside and takes my hand. I lead her around the side of the clubhouse building and Loki comes with us.

As soon as we round the corner of the building, I can see Sticks and a couple of the other Boulder guys talking to a couple of the local ones over a pretty sweet looking bike.

Piper squeals, and runs straight at Uncle Sticks. “Sticks,” she yells. At least eight pairs of eyes land on Piper and Sticks’ face lights up.

“Pipes,” he says and opens his arms. She jumps straight into them. He stands up, catching me in his line of sight. I walk up to him and wrap his arm around my shoulders the way Loki had. Though it’s not possessive, just what Sticks does.

“How you doin’ kid?” he asks me.

“Good to see you.” I smile at him. He squeezes me harder and then turns his attention to Piper. “I’m gonna go help in the kitchen, can you keep an eye on her?”

“Of course, I’ll bring her in the back door. The guys are itching to see her.” He smiles at me. I nod and ruffle her hair.

I lean down. “Behave. I’m gonna go help Loni, okay?”

“Bye, mom,” she says without even looking at me. I roll my eyes and laugh as I turn toward the kitchen.

Loki grabs my arm and I look up at him. He doesn’t say anything, but I can see the war happening in his eyes. “Keep an eye on her?” I ask and he grunts. I shake my head and he releases me.

I step through the portal on the garage side of the building to find the kitchen and Loni. She puts me to work immediately after introducing me to a couple of the other ladies in the kitchen. I notice immediately that they’re all wearing cuts and Angels’ colors. They’re old ladies. It feels comfortable and normal back here surrounded by them but I can’t help questioning why it is they called me in over any of the other females.

We work in the kitchen for a while before Piper comes bounding in the back door. She has something around her neck and I narrow my eyes, trying to make it out. “What’s that, baby?” I ask her.

“Uncle Sticks gave it to me,” she squeals and lifts it to show me.

My eyes go wide. “Oh shit,” one of the women behind me says.

Then Sticks comes into the kitchen after her. I look at him. “She’s Wicked Angels now, darlin’,” he grins. Following behind him is Big Daddy D and I notice a couple of the girls behind me gasp when he comes into the room.

“You gave her family colors?” I ask him.

It’s Big Daddy who answers me, “All the kids get them.”

“But I’m not Angels,” I remind both of them.

“Not technically,” Loki says as he comes in behind the other two. “Not yet anyway.” There is a gleam in his eyes that sends my heart fluttering in my chest.

“But she is,” one of the old ladies says. I turn to see which one and it’s Kara, she belongs to Opie. She’s pointing at Piper. “Am I the only one that sees it?” she scoffs.

“No, woman, you’re not,” Sticks says.

All the other girls are looking at Piper, then they look at Loki then back to Piper before finally landing on me. “Oops,” is all I can say.

The women laugh. I turn red as a cherry.

“Skit, you crazy ass, why didn’t you tell me?” Loni says as she wraps her arms around me. “She looks just like him,” she whispers in my ear.

I just shrug, unsure of what else to say. “I look like who?” Piper says. “Mom says I look like my daddy.”

“You can say that again,” Sticks grumbles, but I see him elbow Loki who stands there dumbstruck.

We stand around for a few minutes. I never answer Piper’s question and then Loni shows the guys from the kitchen and grabs Piper and puts her up on the counter next to where she’s working.

Loni and Piper carry on a conversation for more than twenty minutes and it warms my heart to watch until Piper says she’s bored. I run out to the car and grab her bag.

There’s a couple of chairs in the kitchen and she makes herself comfortable with her tablet and she curls up with it watching a movie with her headphones on.

There’s a scuffle in the common room and a couple of the old ladies go running in there. I stay behind, not really caring what’s going on out there. There’s alcohol, drugs, sex, who the hell knows. I look over at Piper and she’s fallen asleep. I smile at her as I reach for my phone to call Emily.

Ten minutes later, I’m handing Piper over to Emily outside the gates. Piper doesn’t want to leave, but she’s satisfied when I tell her she can see Sticks tomorrow. “What about Loki? I wanna see him too.”

His name on her lips warms my heart. “Him too,” I tell her.

“Good,” she yawns and off they go.

I turn back toward the clubhouse and Pyro is standing on the other side of the gate. “Hi,” I breathe as I approach him.

“Why did you bring her?” he asks me.

“I didn’t have much of a choice,” I tell him.

“Bullshit,” he snaps.

“She wanted to see Sticks and the rest of the guys.”

“She’s got no business being here.”

“That’s rich,” I snap at him. “She’s been around them ever since she was born. She misses her Uncle Sticks.” I put a little more emphasis on the word uncle and the steely expression on his face fades away.

“Not fair.”

“No, what’s not fair, Pyro,” I sneer his name, “is living in a world where I tell her about her Uncle K, who’s dead.” I drop it after that. I don’t want to say too much. I have my suspicions about Pyro. He obviously knows about Kellen because his attitude toward me speaks volumes.

I go back toward the backdoor of the kitchen. A couple of the guys, Cowboy and someone else, are out back of the kitchen firing up burgers, brats, hot dogs and other shit for dinner. I join them.

Cowboy turns to me. “Hey Skit, this is Opie.”

I look over the man with Cowboy. He’s about Loki’s age, his hair is cropped short, almost military, he’s wide in the shoulders and his arms are completely covered in ink. I hold my hand out to him. “Nice to meet you, Opie. I met Kara, she’s great.”

His face lights up at the mention of his old lady. “She is, isn’t she?”

I laugh, “She is. I gotta get back in there. It was nice meeting you, Opie,” I smile.

“Likewise.”

I reach for the door. “Skit?”

“Yeah,” I turn back to Cowboy.

“Thanks for helping out in there.”

I smile. “Anytime.”

For the first time since I met him, Cowboy gives me a genuine smile that reaches his eyes. They crinkle a little at the corners. He’s probably in his late forties, been riding a long time and he’s called Cowboy because when he doesn’t have a helmet on his head, he wears a cowboy hat. Odd thing for a biker, but the hat has metal medallions that run around it. Giving it a more badass look. I saw his bike once and he has a special saddlebag for it.

I go back inside and get back to work setting out the food along the row of tables pulled from the clubhouse and lined up outside. Plates, silverware, potato salad, fruit salads, all the fixings you could possibly want to go with a cook-out. The guys are busy arranging picnic tables and the sun is on the verge of setting below the horizon when the first pans of burgers and dogs are added to the table.

I’m watching over the food when I feel warm arms wrap around me. His scent assaults my nose and my sex heats.

“She asked about you,” I tell him.

“Yeah?”

I chuckle. “She didn’t want to leave. I told her she could see Sticks tomorrow. That was okay, but then she asked about whether or not she could see you tomorrow. When I told her yes, she got excited.”

I can’t see his face but I hear his breathing shift and change behind me. “She’s a great kid.”

“Yeah, she is,” I add to his sentiment.

“Thank you,” he whispers in my ear.

“How many times you gonna say that today?”

He chuckles, “A few more maybe.”

“For what, this time?” I ask.

“For stepping up and helping the old ladies with this.”

“Why me? Why not one of the other girls?”

“Because none of the other girls will be old ladies one day.” His voice is soft in my ear and I turn around in his arms, hooking mine behind his neck.

“What are you saying?”

He smirks at me then moves to kiss me, I turn my head. He growls.

“Not fair,” he mumbles.

“Totally fair, you’re dodging my question,” I tell him and he leans to look at me.

“Mine,” he growls and presses his lips to mine.

My head swims, my body hums, my sex ignites with desire and lust for the man I’m trying to hate. My body is betraying me and he knows it. His tongue slips into my mouth and I stop breathing.

“About fucking time.” I hear Sticks.

I release Loki’s mouth and turn toward him. “For what?” I ask.

“That he made an honest woman out of you,” Sticks remarks with a chuckle as he walks down the food line.

I look back at Loki, who quickly raises and drops an eyebrow then he smirks, “About time.”