She was still stunned.

Jordan obviously made a point of never—ever—looking at LoneStarStateBaseball.com, but once the news hit the media at large, she was tuned in pretty quick to the fact that Carter Fox had somehow been suspected of steroid abuse.

April had at least had enough tact to leave it alone, though she did give the occasional surreptitious look her way. Thank goodness no one else at school knew about her and Carter, since they’d made a point of keeping it under the radar last semester. She couldn’t take the entire school looking at her that way.

In the safety of her bedroom, she had opened up her laptop to read everything. A syringe with his blood on it?

She felt so hopelessly sorry for him. Sent back to Houston from spring training, with everyone most likely turning on him, thinking him guilty. His teammates. His fans. Based on what little interaction she’d had with his mother, she couldn’t imagine there was much warm solace in those arms.

She felt angry. A surge of fiery protectiveness surged through her veins. This was Carter Fox, her Carter Fox. The man who had lain with her under the stars. The man who had told the world to keep their damn mouth shut when it came to her. The man who told her all about Venus.

The man who was the father of her baby.

Jordan had gone and abandoned him just like everyone else. After a few weeks of blocked calls and texts, he had eventually given up. By the time Jordan knew for sure, she had kept waiting for the right time. Now that she was ready, it most certainly wasn’t the right time for him.

Ben had texted her: Do you believe it?

She had immediately responded. No!

One second later he had replied. Me neither.

So Carter had at least two people in his corner.

He had to know that she was here in Austin, thinking about him, caring about him…loving him?

Her heart stopped. There hadn’t been a day that she didn’t think about him, especially now. Whether it was some new, weird symptom of her pregnancy that made her aware that she was carrying a part of him inside her, or a random thing that brought his face to mind, clear as day: the something in royal blue; a truck that was the same make and model as his; looking up at the night sky.

She remembered how it felt to be in his arms, joking around with him, listening to him tell her some weird fact about space, trying to explain baseball to her, even carrying down the stairs against her will. God, how she missed all of that.

Even if she couldn’t pick up and drive to Houston to be with him, she wanted—needed—to let him know she was his.

So she’d written a simple text:

Carter. I saw the news. I just want you to know that you have at least one person who knows that it’s all lies. I know Ben feels the same way. Call me. I miss you.

* * *

She was in the kitchen later that evening, wearing an old UT t-shirt and Victoria’s Secret pajama shorts washing up the bowl of spaghetti she’d had for dinner.

Carter hadn’t called or responded to her text. She was heartbroken, but she understood. The man probably had a million things on his plate. Playing make-up and break-up with a pigheaded Jordan Douglas was probably not high on the list of things he wanted to deal with right now.

How could she have been so damn stubborn? She’d left in a huff, not even giving him a minute of time. She hadn’t returned any of his desperate phone calls or texts. She’d ignored him for months trying to wrap her head around this pregnancy, recognizing full well that he had every right to be involved so he could make a decision. It had taken a devastating knock to his career, his life, to actually get her to reach out to him again.

No wonder he was ignoring her.

April was in the living room, having taken over the coffee table with highlighters, pens, laptop, casebooks and more. Even over the music blaring from the earbuds, she started with surprise, just as much as Jordan did at the insistent knocking at the door. Since Jordan was the one already standing, she headed over and took a peep through the peephole.

Her heart exploded.

It was Carter.

She pulled back and stared at the door, jumping as he started in on a second round of knocking. She looked through the hole again and saw the angst on his face. It made her heart seize.

By now, April was next to her, curiosity and worry clouding her face. She mouthed the words who is it?

Jordan looked at her friend, bit her lip, then opened the door without responding.

April’s eyes grew wide, blinking rapidly as she saw who it was.

“Carter,” Jordan breathed.

He looked at her, blinked over at April, as if registering the fact that his unannounced visit might be impacting more lives than hers.

“Um, hey,” April said thinking fast, “You know, I was just about to head over to Matt’s tonight if you need the apartment.” Her face went back and forth between the two of them.

Jordan gave her a grateful smile as her roommate turned to go pack up her stuff.

“Sorry,” he said watching her roommate head back toward the living room. “I—I didn’t realize—I just…you’re the only one I could think of to talk—”

“It’s okay Carter,” Jordan shushed him. She grabbed his arm and led him inside.

April was finishing up stuffing everything haphazardly into her bag and watched as Jordan led him to take her place on the sofa. While his back was turned she gave Jordan an are you going to tell him? look.

Jordan quickly shook her head no.

April shrugged and left.

Now was definitely not the time. The last thing he needed was a surprise baby on top of everything else.

She sat on the sofa next to him, pressing her lips together with worry over the state he was in. The man looked a complete mess. Had he just hopped in his car and made the 180-mile trip on the spur of the moment? She supposed she should be glad he had made it in one piece, especially considering the haggard appearance, head in his hands, fingers grabbing his blond locks that looked like they hadn’t been combed at all today. She also suspected there had been more than a bit of alcohol at some point.

He was wearing a flannel shirt, half buttoned. The jeans were loose and comfortable, and the usual, well-worn cowboy boots were on underneath. Every piece of clothing was wrinkled and disheveled as if he’d twisted and turned during his whole drive over.

“I just…I don’t understand how this could be happening,” he groaned with frustration.

She rubbed his back, not knowing what to say, just wanting to be there for him. She had read the original article. It was pretty incriminating. Then, the follow-up articles, where his DNA had matched. Jordan didn’t understand it either. All she knew was there was no way Carter Fox, the man who loved baseball, the man who had so much respect for the game, would ever taint it by taking prohibited drugs.

Having him here like this, in person, for the first time since she’d left Houston made her want to hold him tight and tell him everything was going to be fine. She regretted the way she had left him. She felt a fierce need to comfort him well up inside her. Maybe it was the baby inside of her—his baby. Maybe it was because the hormones were really starting to kick in. Maybe it was because she was the first person he had thought of to come to for comfort.

All she knew was, this was her man and if he needed her to be there for him, she would be. She would shield him against all the negativity and hate being thrown at him. Soothe away all the pain and suffering he was going through. Calm his fears and worries. Just…be there. She would never, ever abandon him again.

Because she loved him.

She didn’t realize it until she saw him at his most vulnerable. As much pain as he was in, her heart ached twice as hard, watching him suffer it.

She leaned over and wrapped her arms around the back that was hunched over on his elbows. Her head rested on his shoulder as she ran her hands soothingly over his hair.

“It’s going to be fine, Carter,” she soothed. “We’ll figure this out together.”

She could feel her body reacting to being in such close proximity to him again. The smell of him was so familiar and arousing. The feel of his hardened muscles, tightly wound under her soft cheek as he sat there, taut with frustration. She wanted to massage every bit of tension away, turn him back into the playful, teasing Carter who was always the one trying to make her let go and unwind.

“April will be gone all night,” She murmured into his back. “Stay with me. Let me help you.”

She felt a shuddering breath go through his body underneath her as he let it out. His muscles relaxed and he turned his face around nuzzling it into her neck. His torso followed as he wrapped his strong arms around her, embracing—absorbing—her into a powerful bear hug.

Her arms went around his neck, cradling the back of his head into her shoulder, kissing his temple, savoring him. Her legs naturally wrapped around him wanting every part of her against every part of him. She pressed herself into his embrace, letting him know that she was all his, in any way he wanted her.

She felt his hands slide up then work their way under the waistband of her shorts, seeking, massaging, grabbing. Squeezing. He groaned into her clavicle and she felt his manhood pressing into her, straining against the zipper of his jeans.

God, how she wanted him.

She leaned down to bite the edge of his ear, wanting nothing more than to taste him. Her fingers grabbed at the wool of his shirt, clawing it up his back. He released her so she could finish the job, helping her rip it off of him and cast it aside.

She sat back on his lap, her hands and eyes exploring every bit of tattoo-covered flesh with a hunger that only starvation could cause. God, how she missed him. His embrace. His mouth, his eyes, his hands, his hair, his everything.

They gradually tore away each other’s clothes until they were both naked.

Carter didn’t even pause; simply fell on top of her and thrust himself inside of her causing her to grunt with pleasure. She met him just as hard, pressing her thighs tightly against his waist, arching her back into him, digging her claws deep into his back, pressing him harder into her.

“That’s right,” she urged, growling in his ear. “Give it to me. Give it all to me.”

The rabid yell of release that escaped his lips as he thrust into her, nearly made her deaf. He went harder, faster. It only made her want more. She bucked up against him, urging him to give it everything he had. He met her with an intensity she hadn’t felt before and she knew he was finally letting go.

It went fast and dirty. The violent current of orgasms that raged through her body were nothing like she’d ever experienced before.

“Oh God, Carter!” she yelled with a primal fervor that harkened back to a distant past where civilities were left behind. This was pure, unadulterated fucking. And she wanted more.

Carter was beyond forming anything resembling coherent phrases, simply grunting and groaning and thrusting on top of her like a caveman.

She welcomed it, embraced it. If this helped him, she was a perfectly willing. She was his woman. He was her man.

She felt him stiffen, the final act commencing. She opened herself up to take it all. He released with a shuddering groan, unleashing inside of her.

When his massive body fell down on top of her, she curled around it, welcoming the familiar build. She stroked his hair and back, smiling into his head as he pressed it to her neck.

“Wow,” he breathed. “That was…intense.”

“Yeah,” she said laughing a little.

He lifted himself onto his hands, looking down at her. “You okay?”

She gave a chuckle and reached up to cup his face. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

After they had dressed again, he sat next to her on the couch.

“Where the hell did that come from?” he pondered. Then he chuckled. “I guess it’s a good thing you’re on the pill. I wasn’t even thinking.”

She gave a sardonic smile.

Oh Carter, you have no idea.

“Yeah,” she said in agreement.

She snuggled in beside him and was pleased to feel the familiar arm go around her body, pressing her closer.

“Thanks for that,” he said softly. “I…I have no idea where that came from…but thanks.”

She could hear the mild self-reproach in his voice and she wasn’t having any of it. She reached up to take his chin in her hand and turn his face toward her.

“Hey,” she said. “This is what you needed. I’m here for you. I’ll always be here for you. Got it?”

He looked at her long and hard. As the impact of her words hit him, she was almost certain tears were about to come to his eyes, as a crease dented his forehead. Instead, he just nodded wordlessly and pulled her in closer until his chin rested on top of her head.

* * *

They had escaped to the comfort of her bed and were now lying together, naked in an embrace that was warm and familiar to Jordan. She rested her head against the firmness of his chest and traced a finger over the tattoos on his body.

She didn’t bring up the steroid accusation at all. If he wanted to talk about it, he would say something. She just wanted to be a comfort to him in his time of need.

“Thanks again for this,” he said, staring at the ceiling. “For once I’m glad you don’t live in Houston. You have no idea how hard it was trying to get rid of the press once I left my house.”

“Well, thanks for not bringing them here,” she laughed into his chest. She lifted her head to look at his face, the stubble on his chin was practically a small beard at this point. His sharp features were both more jagged, and yet softer, most likely due to a lack of food, and too much drink.

“I’m going to make you some spaghetti. You look like you could use something to eat.”

“What I could use is you lying back down against my chest,” he said pulling her down.

She fell back reluctantly but didn’t give in. “I’m serious Carter,” she murmured into his chest. “You need to eat. I think April has some Oreos I could steal. She’ll understand.”

Before he could argue again she jumped out of bed, jogged out to the kitchen, grabbed the Oreos and a large glass of milk.

When Carter saw what was in her hands, the smile that she longed to see graced his face. “Oreos and milk? I can’t tell if you’re my mother or my girlfriend.”

The words made her stop short. Mother. Girlfriend?

Being the overthinking Jordan that she was, she immediately wondered if being pregnant had made her think of milk and cookies. She shook her head of the thought. That was ridiculous. Besides, there was no point going down that mental path. She couldn’t tell Carter about his baby…not yet. Not now.