Hallie
I’d tried to be the polite hostess all through dinner, but now that Chris was in bed, I was done. Hearing why my son was ready to take our relationship to the next level, and before my boyfriend was… that was a kick in the teeth. I felt like Chris was trying to force us on Spencer, and he was pushing back.
“You okay, babe?” Spence asked, scrolling the options on Netflix. “You were kind of quiet at dinner. Are you sure you’re okay with me staying here? I know it was kind of Chris’s idea. Not yours.”
I pulled the wool throw over my bare legs, suddenly feeling chilled. “I’m fine with it… if you are? I wouldn’t want you to do anything you’re not comfortable with just to make my son happy.”
He side-eyed me, frowning. “What’s that about?”
“What?”
“You snapped at me. You pissed about something?”
I stared at the TV screen, my jaw tense. “No, why would I be pissed?” Just because my son wants this more than you seem to?
He tossed the remote aside. “What the fuck, Hallie? You gotta talk to me. I can’t read your mind. Is there a problem here?” He gestured between us. “With us?”
I crossed my arms. “I don’t know. You tell me.”
He tipped his head back, closing his eyes as he covered his face with his hands. “If you don’t want to be with me anymore, just say so.”
“Why would you think that?” Because that’s what you were thinking?
“I just get the feeling something’s wrong.” He finally pulled his hands away from his face and looked at me. “And that scares me.”
I softened immediately. I could see it in his eyes, the genuine fear. He really thought I was going to break up with him. Didn’t he know I’d been happier the past two months with him than I’d ever been before? Our relationship had been amazing the first time around, but we were young then. This time it felt solid… and real. The kind of relationship you could build a future on. If that was what he wanted. I had to know for sure.
“I overheard your talk with Chris. The part where he suggested we all live together.”
He grimaced, swiping a hand over his face. “Yeah, sorry about that. I don’t want you to think I was putting those ideas in his head. I wasn’t.”
I nodded slowly, unsure how to respond. I didn’t want him to think I was trying to rush things, but I wanted him to know that I would be ready to take our relationship to the next level as soon as he was.
“I know you weren’t,” I said finally, when it became obvious he expected a response. “Chris just gets carried away sometimes. He really likes you, and he’s proud that you guys have a relationship.” I smiled. “His friends can’t believe he really knows you.”
“I’m crazy about him,” he said, biting his lip. “He said some things tonight that really got to me.”
Uh oh. I knew my kid. He was sweet and likeable, but he could also be relentless when he had his mind set on something. “Like what?”
He reached for my hand. “He said he wished I could be his dad instead of… him.”
He’d been careful not to bad-mouth Rob in front of Chris, but it was obvious he still had issues with my ex-husband being back in our lives. “I wish that too,” I whispered, squeezing his hand.
“You do?”
It seemed like he was holding his breath, awaiting my response. “How can I not? I’ve seen the way you are with him. Any woman would consider herself lucky to have you father her child, Spence.”
He released a shaky breath. “I want that so much,” his said, his voice faint. “A family… with you.”
“You do?”
“You have to know that.” He looked at me a long time before he said, “How can you not know that? I tell you all the time how much I love you. I think it’s pretty obvious I love your son too. And I want more kids, like we talked about a couple months ago.”
I smiled, my heart swelling at his comment. “You said more kids.”
“Well, yeah, of course.”
I leaned in, kissing him before looking him in the eye. “You didn’t say you wanted kids of our own. You said you wanted more kids, like you already consider Chris to be yours.” He didn’t know it, but that made me love him even more, if that was possible.
“I do.” When I crawled into his lap, straddling him, he settled his hands on my hips. “That’s why this is so goddamn hard for me, Hallie. I’m developing this great relationship with Chris, but there’s this other guy in the picture, ya know? It would be different if he’d been in his life all along, if he’d been a real father to him and Chris loved him. If that were the case, I’d totally understand. But it’s not.”
“No, it’s not,” I agreed, kissing him.
It was hard to be in this position and not think about the fact I’d rather be naked, but I knew that would come in time. Sex with my man was always a given when he spent the night at my place or I spent the night at his when my mom had Chris for a sleepover.
“It’s just…” He grimaced. “It’s not fucking fair.”
I grinned, thinking how adorable he looked when he sulked.
“Don’t smile,” he warned. “I’m serious. I don’t see why he should get another chance. He had more than ten years to get his head out of his ass, and he didn’t. So why now? When you and I finally get our shot. When we’re getting a chance to give Chris a real family, maybe with a little brother or sister someday.”
“You sure you still want that?” I asked, fighting back emotion. God, I wanted that so much, a baby with this man. Someone who knew how to be a real father, even though he had no experience, who would enjoy every single second of my pregnancy and every day that followed, when he got to hold his baby in his arms.
“More than anything.” He rested his forehead against mine. “It may seem weird, but I think about it a lot.”
“You do?” I wanted to hear more. I wanted to know I wasn’t the only one peeking in strollers as I passed and playing the “what if” game.
“Yeah, I do. These parents on my U6 team just had a baby. God, she’s so cute. I hold her, and I fucking melt, babe.”
“I melt when you say stuff like that,” I murmured, holding his gorgeous face in my hands. He had so much scruff it was verging on a beard, but I loved it.
He drew me close, whispering in my ear, “Sometimes when we make love, I imagine I’m trying to get you pregnant.”
Oh God, he was getting hard, and I was getting wet just talking about it. “Tell me more,” I said, locking eyes as I grinded on him.
I was wearing a strapless, cotton maxi dress, sans panties since I didn’t want the lines. But with it hiked up around my thighs the way it was now, it made access so easy I wondered why I didn’t go commando all the time.
He traced the shell of my ear with his tongue, making me whimper. “I can hear you begging me to give you a baby, asking me to fill you, to give you everything you need.”
My breathing was shallow as I tugged his pants and boxers down, fisting his hard length in my hand before climbing back into his lap. He did fill me… first with two fingers, until I was panting and throwing my head back while I braced my hands on his broad shoulders.
He grabbed my hips and eased me down, mesmerized by my reaction as I tried to stifle my cries. We’d never made love with Chris in the house before, and I was painfully aware of the fact we weren’t behind closed doors, but my long dress coupled with the throw would shield us long enough to right our clothes if we heard his bedroom door creak open.
He closed his mouth around my nipple, pulling deep as I tried hard not to moan. It was torture, feeling so good and not being able to release it. I thought of Spencer’s huge house with the master at one end and the other four bedrooms at the opposite end of the hall, obviously designed to maximize privacy.
“Maybe we should have slept at your house tonight,” I said, moaning softly into his mouth when he kissed me.
“Or maybe you should sleep at my house every night from now on.”
I didn’t have time to react before my body clenched and I started riding my release, kissing him hard to smother my pleasure.
“I mean it,” he said, kissing a path from my jaw to my ear. “I want you guys to move in with me.” His pace was slow and controlled, but I wasn’t fooled. I could feel the tension in every taut, rippling muscle. He was putting himself out there, terrified of rejection.
“But you made it sound like…” Oh, he made it so hard to think when he gripped my hips like that, moving me back and forth, the delicious ache building once more. “You weren’t ready when Chris… suggested it.”
I closed my eyes, lost in the sensation. I didn’t know how I’d gone years without sex or without this man. My memories of it and him must have dimmed for the sake of self-preservation. Otherwise I would have been camped out on his doorstep when I’d heard he moved back to town. Begging for this.
“You like the way I make you feel, baby?” His eyes were glazed, and he was obviously as lost in the moment as I was as he kissed my neck when I gripped him tighter.
“I love it.” When he circled my tits with his big hands, licking them, I whispered, “I love you, Spence. So much.” I told him that all the time, but I loved that hearing it made him smile every time.
“Then move in with me.”
“You really want that?”
“You have no idea how much.”
I couldn’t believe we were having this conversation during sex. We never talked during unless it was to whisper naughty things in each other’s ear.
“Say yes.”
I could tell he was struggling to hold back by the way he clenched his jaw and dug his fingers into my hips. I could also see in his eyes that split second when he lost the battle and frustration morphed into gratification.
“Yes,” I whispered when, through his own release, he reached between us to make sure I got mine.
His fingers were strumming my tender flesh as he flooded me, growling deep in his throat when he lost the bid to silence.
It took a few seconds for my answer to sink in before my eruption was overshadowed by the sight before me. The love of my life, the toughest guy I’d ever met, with tears in his eyes.
He pulled me close, holding tight. “You mean it? You guys will move in with me?”
“We’d love to.” I knew I didn’t even have to ask my son. He’d be all over that.
“I love you so much,” he whispered. “Both of you.”