He wouldn’t pick up. I’d left voicemails, text messages and he hadn’t returned any of them. I couldn’t let myself worry about that right now, I knew he was busy today he told me so himself, he had meetings all day with my brother. I would have to drop this bomb on him later tonight, although I really wasn’t in the mood to go out. I’d rather curl up in a ball under the covers and go to sleep, but I wouldn’t let my fear of Anton control me. I refused to let him win.

It was funny to think, only a few months ago I was living an ordinary life, going to college, hanging out with my girls, without a care in the world. Now Kaden was back and my whole world had been turned upside down. I wasn’t blaming him because it wasn’t his fault, he told me the truth about himself, he didn’t lie to me. But his life, it was dangerous, he warned me of this, I knew what I was getting myself in to, but that didn’t mean it made it any less frightening.

What was Kaden going to do when I shew him the note, is he going to go after Anton? Would he kill them. God, my head was pounding, this was all too much.

Deciding I needed to get rid of my pent-up frustration, I grabbed my running gear and got changed.

I told mum I was going for a run and I’d be back soon. She didn’t mind, she was too busy unpacking shopping anyway.

Reaching the park, I picked up my pace until my calves and thighs were burning. I ran to the beat of the songs playing through my ear buds, the world and everything that had happened today was drowned out and I felt like I could finally breathe again. The anxiety fell away with every second my foot pounded the ground.

This was why I ran, it made me feel good, it helped me think clearly, it helped with my anxiety that would drag me down some days. It was freeing, I escaped from reality. But what was unfortunate was when I got home, reality would come crashing down on me. In truth, there was no escape other than facing what needed to be done, I couldn’t keep running from my problems, but I’d admit it was much easier when I did.

Reaching my house, I slew down my pace and walked the rest of the way.

Going inside, I kicked off my trainers and headed into the kitchen for some water. “Honey what’s wrong. You ran for hours, you only run for hours when something is bugging you, so tell me what is it?”

I filled up a glass of water at the sink and turned so my back leant against the counter “You should’ve seen the inside of John’s café mum it was ruined, that was all he had and now what’s he is supposed to do with himself, start from scratch, because you know he’s not getting any younger.”

She blew out a breath. “I know Eva and what happened to John is terrible, devastating even, but what matters is he is ok, and he didn’t get hurt. He wouldn’t want you getting yourself all worked up over this now would he, he would want you to be strong for him. And as for his café, he’ll figure something out and if he needs anything we will help him,” she got up from her chair and came to where I was standing, she held my face in the palms of her hands. “You’re a sweet girl Eva, always worrying and caring about others, I’m proud of you,” she pulled my head down and placed a soft sweet kiss on the crown of my head. “I’m popping out now, going to see Mandy for a little while, will you be here later?”

“No, I’m staying at Kaden’s this weekend, but I’ll give you a ring ok.” I pulled her into my arms for a hug. “And thanks mum, you’re the best!”

Tamed was packed tonight. Every corner, every side of the room was filled with people, there was hardly any space to bloody breathe. But lucky for us, we were able to get a private table away from all of the chaos.

I had barely touched my drink, with how nauseated my stomach felt, I wasn’t sure if I would be able to keep it down. Caleb was managing the bar tonight, I asked if I could possibly see Kaden now, but I was told he was busy in a meeting with some associates of his Fathers, which only made my anxiety worsen. Were these good people or were they his enemies. Shit, I was getting paranoid, but after today, I couldn’t help it, I was shook up.

Elaine, Liv and the boys were somewhere on the dance floor, enjoying themselves, as they should. I was sat the table anxiously waiting for Kaden to finish up in his meeting, I needed to get this shit with John off my chest before I exploded. I knew Kaden didn’t know what happened yet, otherwise he would’ve told me.

“What’s a pretty girl like you doing up here all on your own?” a male voice slurred. I looked up at the voice, the man could barely stand, his brown eyes were bloodshot, his clothes were creased and messed. He had clearly gotten himself in a state.

“I’m waiting for my friends.”

“Would you like some company sweet cheeks?” he winked at least that’s what I thought he was trying to do, he could have a twitch maybe.

“Erm no,” I told him, smiling tightly. “I’m ok thanks, I was just going to find them anyway.” I climbed out of the booth and went to head to the dance floor when he grabbed my wrist, arsehole. “Where do you think you’re going?” he slurred, “I wasn’t done talking to you.”

“Get your hands of her,” Ben snarled, coming out of nowhere. Holy shit, he was fuming, his nostrils were flared, his fists were clenched at his sides, his jaw was clenched so tight I thought it might break.

“She your girlfriend?” the drunk man asked.

“No,” Ben gritted out. “She’s my friend, but her fella owns this place. So, if I was you, I would get your fucking hands of her right now.”

“Yeah,” Kaden growled coming into view, looking just as angry as Ben, only difference was with him, I could feel the anger rolling of him in waves, he could barely contain himself. “What he said, get your fucking hands of her before I remove you from her with force and trust me, you won’t fucking like it if I have to do that.”

The drunk man held his hands up in surrender. “Shit alright, don’t want no trouble. Her pussy probably ain’t worth it anyway.”

Oh shit, I thought to myself, that was a mistake. Kaden slammed his fist into the man’s jaw and knocked him on his arse, unconscious. “Ben get Caleb and tell him to remove this man from my club” Ben nodded and wandered off. Kaden and I stood there in what seemed to be a stare of. His gaze was heated. His jaw ticked, and his hair was a mess, making my fingers itch to touch him. His anger had only turned me on that much more, did that make me insane, I didn’t care, this man was mine.

Kaden grabbed my hand and pulled me through the club in the direction of his office. He didn’t say a word; his grip was tight on my wrist. I could feel him losing his self-control. Entering his office, he slammed the door shut and turned the lock. I stood in the centre of his office and watched him pace in front of the door, pulling at the strands of his hair.

“Fuck,” he growled and stalked towards me. He picked me up by my thighs, walked us over to his desk and sat me down on the edge. Kaden stood between my thighs. He was breathing harsher now, I felt my knickers dampening at the sight of this beautifully angry man, who was looking at me like I was his next meal, lust started to fill me, his eyes were pools of desire, I bit my lip and gripped the desk, I could barely contain myself.

He grabbed the back of my head, pulling my head forward. His lips crashed against mine, it was a violent, hot, demanding kiss, our tongues tangled with one another, our hands wandered each other’s bodies with need. We clawed and ripped at each other’s clothes, getting rid of the barriers between us. I felt his anger still, it heightened both of our senses, but in this moment, we needed each-other.

I was fully naked with my arse planted firmly on his desk and in this moment, I felt sexy and wanted, but so damn needy. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled his body closer to mine. “Fuck Eva,” he panted. “You drive me crazy,” his finger slipped between my wet folds and entered me, I gasped at the contact. He began with slow, agonizing circles and then he added a second finger, pumping fast. My juices spilled over his fingers, my head became a fog of lust and love. He pulled down his black suit trousers along with his boxers and freed his erection. “Do you want me?” he whispered huskily in my ear, shoots of electricity shot through my body, my skin was burning hot. “Yes,” I husked, biting my lip. “I want you Kaden.”

He slammed inside of, me, my mouth opened a loud husky moan escaped me. He thrusted inside of me hard and fast, I felt pain mixed with pleasure it was mind blowing. The sounds of skin slapping against each-other filled the room, both of us panted heavily and we moaned in ecstasy.

My orgasm started to build, I was so close. Kaden pushed himself deeper inside of me, I lifted my hips, meeting his thrusts. He fucked me, he didn’t make love, he needed this, he needed it as much as I did. He was still so angry, and I loved it.

We came together, both of our bodies were covered in sweat, our chests were rising and falling fast. My body shook, my legs quivered, my head rested in the crook of his neck fighting of the exhaustion that wanted to take over me.

“Wow,” I breathed. “Hi.”

He chuckled into my hair, “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“No,” I said, “that was, well it was amazing.”

“Good,” I felt him smile.

“As much as I loved it Kaden,” I moved my head and grabbed his jaw making him look into my eyes. “Are you ok? Because you got really angry early.”

“Yeah I’m fine. I just don’t like that he puts his hands on you, I could fucking kill a man for that, but when I saw the way you looked at me after I hit him, man I had to have you, I fucking needed you like you did me.”

“It was pretty hot,” I kissed his smiling lips. “You also need to thank Ben for intervening when he did.”

“Nah I’m good,” he went to kiss me, but I pulled back. “Fine I’ll thank him, but I still haven’t changed my mind about that asshole.”

“Good enough for me,” I kissed him again.

Grabbing our discarded clothes from the floor, we quickly dressed ourselves.

I told him to sit down because we needed to talk, it was a talk I’d been dreading most of today, but I had to do it, I couldn’t live in fear because of Anton, I wouldn’t let that happen I was stronger than that, I needed to get this of my chest. I was scared of Kaden’s reaction, I didn’t want him to push me away.

I grabbed the crumbled note from my pocket and passed it to him over his desk, unfolding the piece of paper he started to read. His features change with each word, they grew angry, his body tensed, he clenched and unclenched his fist, this wasn’t good.

“Where did you get this?” Kaden said through clenched teeth.

“From Johns café,” he gave me a questioning look, I continued. “After me and mum went shopping we thought we would pop in and see John for a coffee. When we arrived, tones of police cars and officers were out the front of his building,” I blew out a breath. “His café got smashed up Kaden. The windows were smashed in, the whole place was destroyed, I panicked I thought John had been hurt, luckily, he is fine just shook up. They left that note and a messaged sprayed in graffiti.”

“What did the graffiti say Eva?”

“It said,” I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “You’re dead.”

“Fuck,” he slammed his fists on his desk, I jumped. “Shit,” he dragged his hands down his face, he breathed heavily. “Shit, wait here ok. I need to get your brother,” I nod.

I sat and waited. My leg bounced anxiously, my head was plagued with many questions. Why was this happening? When would this shit storm end and what did we do next, not me but Kaden and my brother.

Kaden and Caleb finally returned, after what seemed like hours. Kaden told me to go find my friends and wait for him, because he wished to speak privately with my brother. I couldn’t say I was happy with this because I certainly wasn’t. I had every right to be in that office, to hear what he had to say and what he was going to do, I didn’t deserve to be in the dark, I deserved to know, and I would demand those answers later tonight.

I headed back to the private table where I sat before. Elaine, Liv, Ben and Eric are deep in conversation, smiling and joking with each-other. I slid into the booth next to Liv and said hello, they greeted me and carried on talking amongst themselves.

My head was a turmoil of many emotions. I was scared for Kaden, but I was also scared for us, what if this teared us apart. What if it places a strain in our relationship, I knew Kaden to well, breaking up with me would be his first thought, not because he wanted to, but he thought it would be the right thing to do, but it wasn’t, and I couldn’t and wouldn’t allow it, I would fight for us.

The gang ordered some shots and I opted to join in, needing to relieve the tension and forget just for a little while.

“I forgot to ask,” Liv startled me from my thoughts. “Are you ok from earlier? Ben told us about that drunk man, manhandling you. I’m sorry I didn’t ask, it slipped my mind.”

“Hey,” I assured. “It’s fine and yes I’m good. It’s a good job Ben popped up when he did.”

“Yeah,” she nodded. “It is, I heard your man knocked him on his arse,” she wiggled her brow.

I shook my head laughing. “Yep he sure did.”

“Hot,” Liv fanned her face playfully. I nudged her side with my elbow making her laugh.

“Ben,” I called, grabbing his attention. “Thank you for earlier.”

He smiled and nodded, “no problem, glad I could help.”

“Let me buy you a drink,” I suggested.

“Nah. It’s fine, I’ve got one here,” he gestured to a beer in his hand. “Thanks anyway little Eva,” he winked.

“Your welcome Benny.”

“It’s time to go,” Kaden made me jump, whispering in my ear. “Grab your stuff Eva,” I grabbed my jacket and slipped into it. I went around the table giving my friends hugs goodbye and told them I would see them Monday. Ben gave me a look of concern which, confused me. Why would he be concerned when there was no reason for it. Hmm, I’d have to talk to him about that Monday, because that just doesn’t sit well with me.

The journey to Kaden’s flat was silent. He seemed angry, with me? I wasn’t sure. My consciousness kept telling me to ask him what he had been speaking privately about with Caleb and why he couldn’t speak in front of me. If he was angry then I was angry too because, I wanted to know, no, I needed to know. My mind would not be set at ease otherwise.

We entered Kaden’s flat, he disappeared into his room. I followed behind him. As I entered he went straight into the bathroom closed the door and locked it. A few seconds later, the shower water started to run. I was left standing in the middle of his bedroom, alone, with no explanation. Shaking my head. I went into the kitchen, placed my jacket on the barstool, kicked my shoes off and placed them beside the front door. Going back into the bedroom, I stripped my clothes from my body, threw them into a heap on the floor and grabbed Kaden’s t-shirt and pulled it over my head.

In the kitchen, I poured myself a shot of whiskey, needing to take the edge of and hopefully settle my nerves somewhat. I sat down and waited for him return, how long he would be, I didn’t know.

I honestly didn’t get it. He had sex with me, I told him about what I had seen at Johns café and then he discarded me like what happened before I told him was nothing. It made me feel dirty. It made me angry. He wasn’t the only one who was worried about all of this shit, I was worried too, scared even. But if he would just tell me, we could work this out together. Dragging my hands down my face in frustration, I groaned. Picking up the shot of whiskey I threw it back, ignoring the burning sensation I felt in my throat. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and decided to have another. Grabbing the crystal glass bottle that was filled with expensive whisky, I poured another shot into my glass. I threw it back again, the burning sensation had lessened, but felt warm in my stomach.

My head was light headed from the alcohol intake, I wasn’t sure how much I had drunk this evening, it was a reminder that I hadn’t eaten hardly anything today, I think I had a sandwich, but I wasn’t so sure. Damn my eaten habits were not great.

Kaden finally came out of the bedroom, dressed in only a pair of boxers. He didn’t make eye contact with me, just grabbed the bottle filled with whiskey from my hands and poured himself a shot and threw it back, he had a second. Placed his glass next to the sink and disappeared into his bedroom once again.

I followed him, on the verge of losing my cool. “What is your problem?” I demanded.

“Eva,” he breathed sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. “Not tonight.”

“Not tonight,” I snorted. “Are you fucking serious right now. You don’t talk to me on the drive home, you avoid me when we get here by going in the shower and what you’re going to bed.”

“Look,” he sighed heavily. “It’s been a shitty night and I’d rather not talk about it.”

“You don’t think I’ve had a shitty night?” I shook my head. “Christ Kaden, I’ve had a shitty day. Mine started off crap, but you don’t see me brushing you off, do you?”

“Shit I know,” he ran his hands through his damp hair. “Fuck Eva I really thought Anton was dead, he disappeared for years and now he pops up again, it’s not sitting well with me. Look at what he done to John’s café, he’s fucking innocent in all of this and it’s all my fault. He could come after you, because shit Eva you’re my weak spot, I care about you and if he finds that out,” he shook his head. “I couldn’t live with myself if something would happen to you.”

I walked over to where he sat on the edge of the bed and kneeled in front of him. “Nothing will happen to me. Because you’ve got this Kaden, you’ll protect me, and don’t you dare blame yourself for this, Anton is an awful man, but you, your nothing like him. Your honourable, caring and loving. You’re a better man than him and that’s exactly why your leaving this life behind, you never wanted it in the first place.”

“I don’t deserve you,” his beautiful blue eyes found their way to mine. “You deserve better than this. I’m putting you in danger Eva don’t you fucking get that.”

“And I don’t care Kaden, I don’t want to be anywhere else I want to be here.” I breathed “With you,” he grabbed my hands and lifted me on to his lap. He stood up with me in his arms and took us to the top of his bed.

That night we made slow, sensual, meaningful love. We took our time exploring each other’s bodies and getting lost in one another. Then I fell asleep in his arms whispering the words I promised myself to not admit. “I love you Kaden,” but this smile could never be wiped from my face.