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A Heart of Time by Shari J. Ryan (21)


- ONE YEAR LATER -

 

“If I have to move these boxes one more time—” I jokingly threaten.

Charlotte’s hands sweep up the back of my shirt as she places soft kisses on my chin. “I said, thank you,” she whispers against my lips. “What more do you want from me?” she adds, suggestively.

I scoop her up in my arms and carry her up the steps and into my—our bedroom. “Have I told you how much I love you?” I ask her.

“Only twenty times in the past two hours,” she says with a wry grin. “But in case you plan to show me, we only have an hour before the girls get home from school.”

I yank the sheets down and pull my shirt over my head. “Then don’t waste time,” I say in a low growl. She hops backward into the center of the bed, slipping off her shirt, pants, and everything else beneath. I climb over her, lowering my body onto hers, embracing her warmth and allowing it to soothe my aching muscles.

I take a moment to stare into her eyes, brushing the hair away from her cheeks. “Do you know how lucky we are?”

“Our crazy, screwed up lives brought us here, so yeah,” she laughs softly.

My mind clears as I focus on Charlotte—her heartbeat, her breaths, her skin against mine, the passion I have for only her. I had been holding myself back from these feelings but with Ari’s encouragement, I finally let my guard down. Now there is room in my life and my heart for passion, a second chance at love—a place both Charlotte and I are discovering together, somewhere that is new to each other like a first love. Our first loves can’t be replaced but they are part of who we both are, and they indirectly played a part in bringing us together, giving us both the gift of a second chance at forever. This second time around is not for replacing memories, love, or a past—it’s only for moving forward and building a new life together as a family, allowing our love for each other to heal our brokenness.

I watch the emotion on Charlotte’s face as we move together in a heated motion. With the tips of her fingers pressed into my back, her lips melt against my neck, and soft moans escape her throat. “Don’t stop,” she whimpers.

Her words trigger rougher movement from me, causing her to clutch my arms harder, bringing along an incredibly delicious pain. “Like this?” I growl, teasingly.

She tries to answer but her breaths are too fast and too loud to create intelligible words. Sweat beads between us as I hold her tighter. The pressure builds, our muscles tighten, and then her tremors cease. I unravel as she does, falling a little deeper into a world filled with light and a happiness that I once thought would be impossible to find again.

Unwinding from our tightened grips on each other, I fall heavily beside her, chasing after each one of my missing breaths.

“Are you ready for tomorrow?” I ask her, curling my arm around her neck.

“Tomorrow is just another day,” she says. “I already have everything I want.”

I press my lips against her forehead. “Our little girls will finally be sisters,” I add.

“And they will have everything they want,” Charlotte says with a gorgeous, satisfied smile claiming her flushed cheeks.

My phone buzzes on the nightstand and I reach over Charlotte to grab it. I press it up to my ear, waiting to hear the wrath from AJ.

“Dude, I’m not even halfway through this job. You need to get your ass down here.”

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” I groan.

“You already did,” Charlotte mutters below her breath through a silent chuckle.

“You motherfucker,” AJ says. “You're in bed right now, aren’t you?”

“Um,” I laugh.

“You’re going on your fucking honeymoon in two days. Can’t you keep it in your pants until then?”

“I’d like to say yes but I’m still making up for the lost time of a five-year, self-induced abstinence.” Charlotte runs her hand through my hair and kisses my temple as she rolls out of bed. I stare at her lazily while AJ continues chewing my ear off. The glow of her bare body in the sun is preventing any and all cognitive thoughts. I have no idea what AJ is saying…never mind getting up, getting dressed, and driving two miles to the job site.

“Hunter!” AJ snaps, trying to regain my attention. Ignoring him, I hang up the phone and toss it toward the end of the bed.

“I’ll have dinner ready when you get home,” Charlotte says, pulling her shirt over her head.

“Thank God, my plan worked,” I tell her. “Dinner on the table, waiting for me in my own house.”

Charlotte throws a pillow at my face and slips her jeans on. “I still have fifteen hours to change my mind about this forever thing.”

Whatever,” I say, grinning like a fool.

She bounces back onto the bed and kisses me wildly before leaving me, breathless and naked in the middle of a mess of sheets.

 

AJ follows me home after cleaning up the job site and I’m not sure why. I didn’t invite him back. Maybe he forgot something in my truck? I step out, waiting for him to open his truck door. But as I’m waiting to ask him what he’s doing, Mom and Dad’s car pull up, too.

AJ finally opens the door with a cocky smirk. “Surprise!”

“Surprise for what? What the hell is going on?”

“I don’t know,” he says with a shrug. “Charlotte wanted to have the family together tonight. Something about not needing a rehearsal but just a nice dinner.”

Mom hops out of the car with her hands clasped together and a look I don’t remember seeing on her face in years. She runs up the driveway and plasters her hands on my cheeks, pulling my head down to kiss me. She leans back slightly and looks into my eyes but doesn’t say anything for a long second. “Why are you looking at me like this?” I ask her.

“First, who plans a wedding in three days?” she asks.

“Two people who have already been married once?” I respond through laughter.

“Second, you listen to me—“ she begins in her motherly advice tone. “I can say this because I am your mother, no matter how old you are...” She pauses for a moment as a smile perches over her lips. “I am so proud of you, Hunter. So damn proud of you.”

I don’t need to ask what she means by this. I know what I put my family through over the past six years. They have stuck by my side every day, good and bad. I have yelled at them. I have told them to go away. I have begged them to let me die. Still, they all stuck by my side with understanding and patience. They have all helped me raise Olive while standing far enough away to avoid stepping on my toes. Mom has made it clear over the past few years that I’m too young to call it quits. I now realize that there is life after death and it’s okay. I shooed away her comments and advice, thinking there was no way I could ever come to terms with what she wanted for me. Turns out, she was right.

She presses her fingers to my heart. “This is yours. It matters, as it always has, and I’m so happy you are being true to it now. Ellie would be proud of you, Hunter. I promise you that.” Without the proper words to respond to her statement, I pull her in for a hug, feeling her body shudder slightly as her arms tighten around me.

“I love you, Mom. Thank you for always be being here for me when I need you, even at those times when I don’t know I need you.” She grabs my face and kisses my cheek, sobbing silently under her breath.

As mom takes my hand, we all filter into the house, finding Olive running around like a little crazy person, full of excitement. She’s getting a sister tomorrow and gets to wear a pretty dress—clearly that’s all it takes to make a little girl’s world complete. “Grammy, do you want to meet my new sister?” Olive says through giggles while spinning Lana in circles.

“I’m pretty sure we’ve already met, you silly girl,” Mom says.

“You know what else?” Olive continues. “I get to use my magical key tomorrow.”

Mom looks at me with question, as I’m not sure I ever mentioned this key that Ari gave her. “Oh really?” Mom says.

“Yep, you’ll see,” Olive says with a smile.

“What key?” Mom asks me.

“You’ll see,” I echo Olive, giving her a wink.

Mom rolls her eyes and wanders off into the kitchen to help Charlotte. Dad and AJ fall into the couch, chatting about the job site today and Tori walks through the door. AJ is up and over to her side within a second, ushering his very pregnant wife over to the couch. “Two weddings and a baby this year,” Dad says with a proud glimmer in his eyes. “And the Cole name continues. It’s a good year.”

Throughout the evening, within their happiness, I notice a defined switch in the way my family is acting. It’s something I’ve either been too closed off to notice or something I’ve caused. Regardless, the amount of love in this dining room has brought me a sense of peace, knowing that tomorrow the final piece of my shattered life will fit back together, differently, with some cracks here and there, but together, nonetheless.

Mom has been staring at me all night with this gleam in her eyes. I think seeing me happy again has finally taken away some of her pain. Her elbow is resting on the table and she’s gazing at me. I don’t ask her why she’s looking at me the way she is, but I smile back—a full heart-filled smile. Tears well in her eyes and she looks up toward the ceiling, silently thanking those above.

The house clears out shortly after dinner since we all need to be up rather early tomorrow. The girls are sleeping in their new bunk beds and Charlotte and I are curled up on the couch in front of the TV.

“I never thought I could find something so right,” she says, simply, relaxing her head into my chest. My focus drifts to the picture of Ellie hanging on the wall and I find comfort. My heart beats a little harder and I silently thank her for watching over us, making sure that in the shadow of her life, I’m happy.

“I never thought there was something that could feel right again,” I mutter against her ear, kissing her softly. “But I was wrong.”

 

Regardless of needing a normal night of sleep, Charlotte and I both wake up in each other’s arms on the couch as the sun peeks through the trees outside. Most people spend the night away from each other before their wedding, but I think Charlotte and I spent enough time apart that it feels most appropriate to wake up just like this today.

I find myself standing in the center of the house as the morning creeps by, watching the women in my life run around trying to make sure they look perfect for today. I know it’ll only take me twenty minutes to get dressed, so for now, I’d rather just watch the excitement around me. Or until AJ walks through the door.

He’s beaming and he’s got a bottle of Jack in his hand. “Just one shot since I wasn’t allowed to throw you a bachelor party. It’ll loosen up your nerves.”

“I’m not nervous, though.”

“Oh, well, it’s still necessary,” he says, shoving the bottle into my chest.

“You’re supposed to be my best man, not my worst influence,” I laugh.

“Dude, I’m a master at being both.” This he is. Finally, something we can agree on.

Even though Charlotte was okay with sleeping beside me last night, she isn’t okay with me seeing her before it’s time for the ceremony so AJ and I are taking the girls and heading to the gardens.

“I’ll meet you there,” Charlotte says, leaning around the corner, blowing me a kiss.

“Whatever,” I say, giving her a quick wink.

With laughter floating through the hallway, I hear Mom calling Charlotte so she can help her finish getting ready.

“Ready, ladies?” AJ says to Olive and Lana, who are both draped in white knee-length dresses, complete with flowers in their hair.

They’re spinning around in circles, making their dresses fly high, and the excitement bursting from them is something I will always remember about today.

Giggles fill the truck as we make the short drive over to the gardens, finding the lot empty except for one car. Just how I like it.

AJ and I escort the girls down the steps, making our way up to the tree. Olive runs ahead and wraps her arms around the trunk. “Good morning, Mommy.” She cups her hand around her mouth and presses it against the bark. “Daddy is finally happy and it’s the best day of my life. Thank you for watching over him.”

Her words make my chest shudder so I take a deep breath and look up into the clear blue sky, repeating Olive’s words silently on my own.

We continue walking down an unfamiliar path, one that isn’t marked well, one that looks untraveled, but I was told it leads to the place where Olive’s key works. Ari’s dad shared the big secret with me—what lies on the other side of the gated door—and it’s where Charlotte and I should begin our united lives. So that is what we’re doing.

The path comes to an end and we walk up to a wooden gated door between thickly settled trees. It’s like nothing I’ve ever seen before and it’s amazing.

“Go ahead, Olive. I know you’ve been waiting for this.” Olive takes the key from her little, white clutch purse that Charlotte bought for her and slowly places it into the tarnished lock.

With hemming and hawing, the door creaks open, revealing a large enclosed garden full of blue jasmines and white hydrangeas, with a small, narrow cobblestone path down the center that leads up to a white gazebo. A sign perched in front of the gazebo reads, “Olive’s Secret Garden.” The look on her face is one I wish Ari could see as a thank you for the most incredible gift she could have given.

Olive spins around, looking in every corner before she lies down in a patch of flowers. “It’s like Mom is here, everywhere,” she says. “This is the most amazing place; it must be like heaven.”

I lie down next to her, pulling her into my side. “She’s always around you, Olive. She’s always with us.”

We’re in dress clothes and we’re lying on the ground, and nothing has ever felt so right.

No, wait. Now, nothing has ever felt so right. Charlotte, in her beautiful dress, lies down beside me and Lana joins us, as well. We look ridiculous but I know now, looking back up into the sky, that Ellie and Ari are watching us. I have to believe they planned this.

“Should I just pronounce you husband and wife?” Ari’s dad asks, walking in through the gate. When I told him Charlotte and I had decided to get married, which was more than three days ago, he asked me to give him two months and informed me that he was a wedding officiate. I didn’t know why he needed so long, but a garden isn’t built in a day, I do know that much.

“Please,” Charlotte says, twisting her head, bringing her nose close to mine. Her eyes are glimmering under her lashes and her lips are glossed, reflecting the flowers around us. I’m in love with this woman. I am completely head-over-heels in love with her and it feels right—it feels perfect and complete.

Ari’s dad spouts off a few lines before commencing our marriage and the connection of our new family.

Never in a million years did I foresee my life going in this direction, being with someone other than Ellie, lying in a meadow of blue jasmines while joining my life with Charlotte.

Life is like the center of a blooming flower with each petal lifting over time, slowly exposing our hearts and souls as the motion of life circles around us. I can’t change it and I can’t stop it but I can watch and take in the beauty of it all. I definitely took the road less traveled, and my God, has it made all the difference.

Robert Frost, you are a brilliant man.

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