When it hit me, I woke up with a start.

Shit.

Frantically, I reached over to my nightstand, snatched my phone, and sent out a desperate SOS to the girls.

SASHA: Urgent girls talk. Missy’s. 10 a.m. Cancel work if you have to.

I dropped my phone on the bed beside me, cuddled into my pillow, closed my eyes, and cursed under my breath.

I had unprotected sex with Ben.

Four freaking times.

Four times he came inside me and I did nothing. Zilch. I just kept opening my legs to him and begging for more. What the hell was wrong with me? Since when had I become so reckless? I knew I was protected, but I had no clue where he had been. The first time I’d seen him, he had been with one of his bed buddies. I was crazy. Clearly, having the best sex of my life caused me to lose my mind temporarily. Repeatedly. It also erased the thought of having the most important discussion a man and woman could have before having unprotected sex.

With a groan, I threw back my comforter and climbed out of bed. As soon as I stretched, my body reminded me exactly where Ben had been. The delicious throb between my legs and the hiss of my tight muscles as I walked out of my bedroom brought a blissful smile to my face. He’d been spectacular. I’d never had sex like that before, and I didn’t know if I’d be lucky enough in my life to experience it with another man again. He knew his way around a woman’s body like a skilled explorer, and the way he touched me felt like he’d been exploring me for years.

Then there was our Sunday. We did nothing, but it was everything. But I’d had a complete freak out moment, and all I wanted to do was flee. It had been way too intimate. I started imaging things I shouldn’t. And then he laughed, and it was one of the most beautiful things I’d witnessed, and I wanted more of it. But I couldn’t allow those kinds of thoughts to flash through my head, and I definitely could not let them stick. Protection 101 had kicked in, and I needed to get out of there. Ben wanted none of that though. He turned up his alphaness to maximum and his dirty talking to the extreme, and when he slid inside me, I forgot all my fears. I forgot every damn thing. He successfully became the only thing on my mind. Then I came home and his boots by my front door greeted me with the offer of his protection when he was nowhere near me. I still couldn’t believe he’d done that. I leaned up against the wall and stared at them with a silly smile on my face. It was apparent that not only had he been the only thing on my mind when I was with him, but he was destined to become the only thing on my mind when I was nowhere near him.

And that was why I was in the middle of my current freak out, and had sent an SOS to my girls.

I made my way downstairs, desperate for my first cup of coffee for the day, and mentally began planning my day. Thankfully, I had the day off work because I worked Saturday. I’d be able to catch up on the things I missed doing while I was at Ben’s. When I reached the kitchen, I prepped my coffee, popped a couple of pieces of bread in the toaster for breakfast, and started making a grocery list. As I wrote avocado on my list, my phone buzzed on the counter with an incoming text. After closing the fridge, I tagged my phone, assuming it would be one of my girls, but I was surprised to find a number I didn’t recognize.

UNKNOWN: How are you feeling this morning?

SASHA: Who is this?

UNKNOWN: The giver of your most recent orgasms. How’s your cheek?

SASHA: Are you sure about that? I've been home for at least twelve hours. A lot can happen in that time.

My thumb quickly flew across the screen as I tapped out what I knew I wouldn’t send if I didn’t do it quickly.

SASHA: By the way, we have to talk.

BEN: I don’t know who I like better? The cute or the sassy Sasha. What do we need to talk about?

SASHA: It is not a conversation to have via text.

BEN: I’ll come to Sass.

SASHA: I've got the day off.

BEN: I’ll come to you tonight.

I locked my phone and ignored the rush of warmth that hit me at the thought of him coming to me tonight, and I rushed back upstairs after pouring myself a coffee to start getting ready for the day. By the time I turned on the shower, I’d already sucked back half my cup. I took a long, hot shower and then began my morning routine: slathering my body with coconut cream body butter, cleansing and toning my face, followed my moisturizer and then makeup. Some people were confused about my routine, but my skin was happy that I was a little unusual. As I applied my foundation, I focused on the light bruise on the top of my cheek. Now that I was on my own, I had the chance to really think about what happened at Hamilton’s. I still didn’t understand why the lights went out, and why the generator didn’t kick in. We paid a lot of money for that thing so it should work. Then I thought about Edward O’Leary and a shiver cascaded down my spine. I had to talk to Ben about what would happen now. Especially with him breaking into Sass and taking my personal details. That thought still made me ill to my stomach. I couldn’t understand what he would get out of my documents. He’d known me for over twenty years. And I also couldn’t understand him being in Sass and telling people we were sleeping together. And knowing that Drew had been seen with him confused me. Had Edward told him that he’d seen me? Did Drew know and just not care? Why were they meeting in the first place? There were so many questions that I was desperate to get answers for. I did my make up as best as I could to cover up the bruise. As I touched it, I sucked in a breath as it still hurt like a mother. It is funny how a night and day of sex could distract you from everything else. Now that I didn’t have Ben’s constant distraction, I felt the soft ache. But my epic one-night-slash-day stand was done. Time to move on, after we had the discussion, and time to start feeling reality instead of living in fantasyland.

After I had finished in the bathroom, I dressed quickly in skinny jeans and a light sweater. Then I decorated my outfit with accessories and was out the door

* * *

I arrived at Missy’s, ordered the biggest coffee I could, with a double chocolate muffin, and began my second freak out of the day. Now, Missy sat opposite me, Paige next to me, and Shelley had just arrived—all were looking at me and waiting for me to drop the bombshell that had caused the impromptu girls meeting.

I sucked in a breath, pushed back my shoulders, and unloaded. “I had unprotected sex four times in the last forty-eight hours with the hottest man I’ve ever met, and I’m freaking out.”

“Shit.” That came from Paige.

“Woah.” That came from Shelley.

“What, are we up to twelve orgasms now?” That came from Missy.

I rolled my eyes. “Come on, twelve is an exaggeration.”

“Says Miss I-had-sex-with-a-man-who-gave-me-three-orgasms-in-one-sex-session.”

“Holy shit! Three in one go? God, I miss sex.” Paige sighed and gave me sad eyes. Since she fell pregnant to the jackass of the century and had Lilly, she hadn’t opened herself up to anyone else, and definitely hadn’t had sex. Her life was Lilly.

“Have you spoken to him?” Missy asked softly. “You are usually so careful.”

“I know. That’s what has me freaking out. He just kind of made me forget everything. He was that good.” I lifted my coffee to my lips and took a huge sip, hoping the caffeine would do something about the unease settling in me. It did nothing. I sighed, and whispered, “Four freaking times.”

The girls all stared at me. The silence was not giving me the answers or comfort I desperately needed. I picked at my muffin, the chocolate offering me some comfort, but not enough to stop the freakout.

“Who is this mystery orgasm giver?” Shelley asked, with a wink.

“His name is Ben,” I replied with a soft smile. “I met him a couple of weeks ago, and it just kind of escalated. He was always around, and he is the kind of man that really gets your attention, and keeps it.”

“He is fucking hot, and he is really into Sasha,” Missy said, confidently. “Like really into her.”

“I met him Saturday night. He is intense, but in all the right ways. And yeah, he is really hot.” Paige nodded as if she was agreeing with herself. “Those eyes are like weapons,”

“Shame I missed him.” Shelley sighed. “He seems like someone I need to see.”

“If Sasha’s around, he’ll be around,” Missy stated matter-of-factly, and I rolled my eyes at her. “He works for the Monroe Police. You might have already seen him.”

“He’s a cop?”

“He’s a detective.”

The way Missy said Detective caused me to burst out laughing. God, she could make anything sound sexual.

“So, when are you seeing him next?”

“He is coming to talk tonight, and I’ll talk to him about all this. But, it’s not like that. It was a one time—okay, four-time thing. You know I don’t do all of this.”

I didn’t miss the flash of frustration in Missy’s eyes. She’d had this conversation numerous times over the years. She’d been there through it all. She also knew that I didn’t allow anyone to get close, especially not a man like Ben Hunt. But thinking that made my stomach fall ever so slightly and my heart squeeze just a little. If I could, I knew Ben would be the kind of man that I could give myself to. He was everything I wanted, but nothing I needed. It was confusion at its best. I’d be stupid to say no if he wanted me back in his bed, but I wasn’t sure that was all he wanted, and that was what scared me.

“Oh, and I forgot to tell you something.” I took a breath while looking at Missy. “Ben saw us dancing at Hamilton’s when we were teenagers, when he was nineteen, and he told me he has wanted to kiss me since he was twenty-one.”

Her eyes shot wide, she leaned forward, and I should have realized it was going to happen.

“What!” she shrieked so loud that all of us jumped in our seats, and caused everyone around us to stare.

“That is so romantic.” Paige swooned, and dramatically clutched her heart.

“Babe, we aren’t talking romance here. I don’t do romance. There is nothing romantic about having unprotected sex four freaking times with a man I barely know!”

She shot Missy a she’s-about-to-lose-it look and lifted her coffee to her lips.

“Okay, this is okay. You just need to talk to him. You are both adults. I am sure it’s totally fine,” Missy said with a smile. “No matter what, he broke the drought. But next time, just don’t let him flood you.”

Only my best friend could make a joke about him coming inside of me. The four of us burst out laughing, and it definitely broke my freak out.

Maybe everything would be okay.

It had to be.

* * *

My next stop was Drew. Ten minutes after leaving the girls, I pulled up out front of his condo and switched off the engine. Sadness soared through me as to why he hadn’t reached out to me. Someone would have had to have told him what went on last night. Both Shelley and Andy had been working. I wish I’d asked her before I left. I locked up my car, walked toward the front door, and knocked. After a few breaths, the door opened and Drew appeared.

The moment he saw me, his face went hard and his eyes narrowed in on me.

“What happened to your face?” he asked, grabbing my hand and pulling me inside. After closing the door behind us, he gently grabbed my chin and tilted my face up into the light. “Start talking, Sash. Who did this?”

“I got hit last night. I don’t know who did it.”

“What the fuck?” he exploded, and in the emptiness of his house it sounded even louder. “Where?”

“I was at Hamilton’s for Missy’s birthday. The lights went out as I was trying to leave, and someone hit me.”

He let go of my face, but his gaze zoned in on my cheek, and his voice dropped scary low. “Someone hit you at Hamilton’s? Did you see who it was?”

“It was pitch black so I’ve got no idea what happened or who did it. It was probably just someone who had too much to drink and was stumbling through the dark. I’m surprised Andy or Shelley didn’t tell you. They were both there.”

“No. I just got back to town and haven’t checked in.” His eyes remained hard. “Did you go and get checked out? How do you feel?”

“I’m fine. It only hurts a little.”

He shook his head and then turned to go into the guts of his home. I followed him, noticed his unpacked duffle bag on the couch, and realized his house looked barely lived in these days. “Where have you been?”

“I had some business in Utah to attend to,”

“Everything okay?”

He smiled. “Of course.”

I didn’t want to fight with him today, but I needed to talk to him about Edward.

I silently gave myself a pep talk and then announced, “I need to tell you something.”

He spun around. “What is it?”

I sucked in a breath before unloading. “The other night Sass was broken into, and someone stole my personnel file as well as Hamilton’s contracts. It’s so random because nothing else was taken. Fingerprints came back, and the only prints in my office were from the girls, Anna and me. So, the regular people that would be in there, but Edward O’Leary’s prints were on the door handle. It was the same night that I, uh, went to dinner with him.” Drew’s eyes shot wide, and he took a frustrated deep breath. I had to be quicker. “I wanted to push the point that nothing would ever happen between us, but it . . . uh, backfired, majorly. That was the first time he kissed me. When the police spoke to him about Sass, he told them that we were sleeping together. We are definitely not sleeping together. And, um, last night he was at Hamilton’s, and he kissed me again.”

“What?” His voice was low, scary low, and his eyes were even scarier. “Are you insane?”

“Dre—”

“That motherfucker is bad news Sasha, and you go and have dinner with him?” he hissed, and ripped his hand through his hair. “He’s wanted you since you were sixteen, and I don’t mean in the innocent high school crush kind of way.”

“Why you were having lunch with him then? If you know he is such bad news?” I said, deciding just to get it all out in the open.

His eyes flashed. “What?”

“A friend saw you two having lunch.”

“What friend?”

“Just a friend.” This was certainly not the time to bring up Ben.

His eyes narrowed, and they got scary. “It was nothing important.”

“You need to start talking to me.”

For a moment, his eyes softened. Then his jaw ticked. “There is nothing for you to worry about.”

“You know I love you, right?” I said, desperate for him to hear me, to believe me.

“Are you getting soft on me?” he joked. He took three steps toward me and then pulled me in for a tight hug that only Drew could give me. “I love you too, Squirt.”

My breathing hitched, I froze against him, and my heart swelled.

That was the first time he’d called me Squirt since Dad died.

It felt more amazing than I could have ever imagined.