CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Sophie
The entire place is absolute chaos. I’ve never seen anything like this. Thousands of people cheer, anxiously awaiting the fight to begin. I sit in the row that’s been reserved for Kolan’s family and friends. The entire gang is here to support him, even Ryder and Emily, who I met for the first time tonight.
I’m trying to absorb it all and join in on the excitement, but I find it incredibly overwhelming, probably because I still feel like a zombie. I told Kolan I was feeling better and I was…up until a few hours before we left then it hit me again. I feel like I haven’t slept in a week, even though that’s all I’ve done. I think Kolan could tell when I saw him in his dressing room, but I did my best to tamp it down. I want to be here for him tonight, and I don’t want him worrying about anything but winning.
“Kate, take it easy, everything is going to be okay. He’s got this.”
I glance over at Katelyn who is sitting next to me, and see her looking as nervous as I feel. Nick has one hand on her leg while the other is draped around her shoulders. I was apprehensive to see everyone tonight, but especially Nick since he knows about my past. However, I had no reason to be. He’s been really kind to me, and it’s clear he has kept the information to himself.
“I know,” she responds quietly. “I don’t know why I’m so nervous. I just…I hate that he’s back here—hate it.”
I do, too. Even though I have no idea what to expect. I think that might be what’s most nerve-racking. I’ve never been to a fight or watched one. Violence terrifies me. But looking around the place, it’s clear this is so much more than that. The chain-link fence surrounding the octagon is even more intimidating, making me fear for Kolan’s life.
“You heard him, Kate. This is the last time. He’s going to put this asshole in his place then he’ll be done,” Nick soothes, kissing her cheek.
My chest swells with adoration at how attentive he is with her. Actually, watching all of these couples together gives me a heavy dose of envy. The guys look rough and tough on the outside but the way they love their wives is admirable. It reminds me of my mom and dad and the love they share… I shove the thought away when pain pricks my heart.
“Well, can I just say for my own selfish reasons that I love what Kolan is doing tonight,” Anna says, speaking up. “The proceeds he’s donating from this fight will benefit the Center a lot.”
“He’s donating all of his proceeds?” Julia asks.
Anna nods with a smile. “All of it.”
“Wow.”
I’m not surprised to hear that. He’s the most amazing man I’ve ever met. It’s impossible not to fall head over heels for him.
“That’s my brother,” Katelyn exclaims proudly.
There’s a shift in the atmosphere, the chaotic energy of the crowd almost palpable as the lights are dimmed, covering the arena in darkness.
“Here we go,” Katelyn says with a big breath, looking over at me with a smile.
Metallica’s “Enter Sandman” blares from the speakers, turning the crowd wild. We all stand as Kolan makes his grand entrance. The music is loud but the chanting is louder.
Dark Warrior.
I lean around Katelyn to get a glimpse of Kolan. His head is down, a hood shielding me from seeing his face as he follows Sarge and another man I don’t recognize to the ring. I smile at the sight of Benny walking with them. He waves to the crowd, arms pumping up in the air; excitement lit all over his little face.
Once Kolan enters into the cage, the hoodie comes off, unveiling his powerful, inked body in loose black board shorts. He looks calm and focused as he rolls his shoulders, every muscle flexing beneath his firm skin. Not even the people’s energy breaks his concentration. He blocks it all out—until he swings his dark eyes to our row, immediately locking with mine. It knocks the breath out of my lungs, the connection so strong we could be the only two people in this place.
The wink he gives me sends a flutter to my tummy and a smile touching my lips. Benny gives me an enthusiastic wave and a thumbs-up, which I return, feeling so excited for him.
“That kid is a total trip,” Sawyer comments with a chuckle. It’s clear he has also taken a liking to Benny. How can you not? He’s one of a kind, and I have a feeling he’s as good for Kolan as Kolan is for him.
Ozzy Osborne’s “Crazy Train” booms from the speakers, signaling the next fighter’s entrance. It’s then that a wave of nausea hurdles through me. Taking a deep breath, I try to tamp it down.
Please let me get through this.
The crowd erupts once again, but it doesn’t hold the same enthusiasm as Kolan’s did. It doesn’t deter Cortez though. He puts on a show as he walks to the ring, a cocky smile on his face as he points at Kolan.
“What an asshole,” Katelyn spits, looking ready to tackle him.
Kolan is unfazed by the challenge. Benny, on the other hand, isn’t so bland about it. He shouts at the top of his lungs and waves a fist at Cortez but it’s too loud to hear what he’s saying. Kolan sends him a light knock in the arm, telling him not to engage.
Once both fighters are in the ring, the announcer begins his introductions, starting with Kolan. The place becomes deafening once again. It’s obvious whom most are rooting for and it seems he has a lot of fans who are happy to have him back. Satisfaction settles over me when Cortez is announced and the cheers dull. There are even some boos as well.
After the announcers leave the ring, the gate to the cage is closed and the fighters are called to the center. It’s then my nerves take a drastic turn. I briefly close my eyes, trying to clear the sudden fuzziness in my head. When the overwhelming sensation passes, I open them to see Cortez lifting his hand to touch gloves, but Kolan doesn’t reciprocate and turns his back to him.
“It’s the first time he’s ever done that,” Katelyn says. “Not that I blame him.”
Rather than be offended, Cortez only seems amused by it. Kolan takes to his corner, eyes hard and determined. Sarge shoves the mouth guard into his mouth and yells something at him. Then Benny gives him a punch in the arm for good luck. When the bell rings, Cortez begins dancing around, but Kolan wastes no time. He moves for him, striking out hard and fast.
I flinch at the hits Cortez takes. He throws a few of his own but misses, Kolan’s reflexes faster than his fists. That’s when he charges at him, wrapping his arms around Kolan’s waist to take him down. But Kolan breaks out of it with ease, sending Cortez to the ground with a sickening blow.
Cheers ripple throughout the crowd, spurring him on. Benny stands in his corner, his little fists punching the air as he mimics Kolan.
Heated words are exchanged as Cortez hurries back onto his feet. He charges at Kolan again, looking furious, and manages to get a couple of shots in that have me wincing. But it doesn’t faze Kolan. It only has him striking out harder.
As I watch the two battle, I suddenly feel in a trance. It’s as if I’m on the outside of my body looking in. My heart begins to pound in my ears and my vision blurs.
Please, God. Not now. Not here.
The wave eventually passes and I’m able to focus once more. Kolan corners Cortez again but this time he doesn’t give him a chance to escape.
“He’s going in for the kill,” I hear Jaxson say.
It all happens in slow motion. Taking a step back, I watch Kolan’s feet leave the floor as he jumps up, his powerful body spinning full circle in the air with grace and agility, bringing his foot around to connect with Cortez’s face. He repeats the move in two consecutive rotations—light on his feet—before he rounds the second kick, landing it at the same time Cortez drops to the ground unconscious.
The entire crowd goes crazy, everyone on their feet, chanting his name.
“The guy is a fucking beast,” Sawyer roars with a fist in the air.
I have to agree. I’ve seen Kolan aggressive. I’ve seen him intense, but I’ve never seen him like this before. Controlled yet lethal. In this moment, with his breathing harsh and body stained with blood and sweat, he looks every bit of the warrior he is.
After the ref lifts his hand for the win, Benny runs at him. Kolan scoops him up and sets him on his shoulders while Sarge does some tackling of his own. The announcer holds the mic up to his mouth, but I miss what he says when I’m hit with another dizzy spell. My head starts to pound, as if someone just took a sledgehammer to it. It mixes with the turbulent storm that’s taken over my body. My hand rests on my stomach as I try to control the overwhelming sensation.
“You okay, Lia?” Kayla asks, placing a hand on my shoulder in concern.
I nod and give her a weak smile, but it’s a lie. I’m not okay. Something feels wrong. I try my best to push it aside as we’re escorted to a private room to wait for Kolan.
With every second that passes, I feel worse. When I break out into a cold sweat, I excuse myself to the bathroom and splash water on my face. It doesn’t help. I inhale deep breaths, my vision blurring as I take in my reflection in the mirror.
“Just breathe, Sophie. Breathe,” I murmur, my fingers gripping the sink to remain upright.
I have no idea how much time has passed when I walk back out to join the group and find Kolan, Benny, and Sarge standing with everyone else.
Benny runs up to me, his eyes dancing with excitement. “Did you see that, Lia? Wasn’t he awesome? He totally kicked ass.” I smile down at him, holding onto his shoulders not only in affection but also for support. His voice becomes distant as I feel my heart race at a frantic pace, thrumming viciously in my ears. “Hey, Lia, you okay?” he asks.
I shake my head then immediately regret it when the ground begins to tilt beneath my feet. As I try to find my balance, I look up to see Kolan racing for me just before my world turns black.
*
Kolan
From the moment she walked in, I knew she wasn’t okay. I could see it in her pale face and glossy eyes. As I stand to see if she’s okay, she succumbs to gravity.
“Shit!” I knock into Jaxson as I rush for her. Nick moves at the same time I do, but I make it first. Alarmed gasps fill the air as I drop to my knees, catching her just before she hits the hard floor. My hand touches the side of her face, caressing her cold, clammy skin. “Sophie, baby, can you hear me?”
Nothing. She’s completely unresponsive.
“What’s wrong with her,” Benny cries, terror gripping his voice. The same fucking one ripping through my chest. “And who’s Sophie?”
Shit.
Ignoring the question, I search for a pulse but only find a faint thrum of life beneath my fingertips. “Call an ambulance.”
“They’re going to take too long to get here,” Cooper says, pocketing his phone. “Let’s go. I’ll drive.”
I cradle her close, pushing to my feet. Just when I’m about to tear out of the room, I twist back to Benny, his wide eyes filled with tears.
Katelyn wraps an arm around his small shoulders and pulls him in next to her. “Go. We’ll take him home.”
“You’ll be okay with my sister,” I assure him. “Keep your phone with you, and I’ll call you as soon as I know anything, okay?”
He nods, wiping his wet cheeks with the back of his small hand.
Cooper sends Kayla home with Jaxson and Julia then we’re in motion, heading out the back way to avoid foot traffic. My chest pulls tight, dread wrapping around my heart like razor wire as I hold her limp body.
On the way to the hospital, Cooper calls it in, weaving in and out of cars with skill and precision. The entire time I hold Sophie close, reassuring her it’s going to be okay, but I have no fucking idea if she can even hear me. Her breaths are shallow and labored. Every minute that passes feels like a fucking eternity, fear swallowing my faith one heartbeat at a time. That’s until she begins to stir in my arms, igniting a spark of hope in my chest.
“Soph, can you hear me?” The only response I get is a deep, agonized moan. Leaning down, I press my lips to her damp forehead. “It’s okay, baby. Hold on. We’re almost there.”
Seconds later, she begins thrashing violently in my arms, bile spilling past her lips.
“Fuck!” I flip her to the side so she doesn’t choke on it and try to keep her still. “Hurry up, she can’t hold on much longer!”
“We’re coming up to it now. They’re waiting for us.”
As Cooper screeches to a halt outside, the emergency doors slide open and three nurses come running out with a bed. I meet them halfway, laying her thrashing body down when it’s the last thing I want to do. Then I’m pushed aside.
The nurses pin her down while running back through the doors. “How long has she been like this?”
“She was unconscious up until a few minutes ago,” I explain, following them inside.
“Did she take anything?”
“What do you mean?” I ask, trying to keep pace with them.
“Any drugs?”
My eyes snap from Sophie to the nurse, my blood heating at the absurd question. “No. She’s sick. She’s had the flu all week.”
The look they all exchange has my back going up.
“Dr. Corrigan, we need you! We have a possible overdose here,” one nurse yells.
What the fuck?
“Listen, lady. She’s not a fucking drug addict. I’m telling you, she’s had the flu all week.”
Before she can respond, a doctor bulldozes past me, following them into a room. I move to enter behind him when one of the nurses stops me with a hand on my chest. “Sorry, sir, you must wait out here.”
I stick my foot in the door before she can close it. “Hold up! What the hell is happening? What are you guys going to do to her?”
“I can’t explain that right now. We’ll fill you in as soon as we can.” Pushing against my chest, she closes the door in my face, leaving me with my world in shambles.
“Fuck!” My fist connects with the hard wall, pain radiating up my arm, but it does nothing to dull the fear hammering through my veins.
“She’ll be all right, Slade. Let them do their job.” Cooper speaks up for the first time, reminding me of his presence.
“Did you hear that shit? They think she’s fucking overdosing.”
He’s quiet for a moment, looking a hell of a lot calmer than I feel. “Are you sure she hasn’t taken too much of something?”
I tense, anger fueling my blood. “What the fuck are you asking? You know she doesn’t do drugs.”
“That’s not what I’m saying.”
“It sure as hell sounds like it.”
“No. But you have to admit, what we just saw is not the flu. Could it be possible she took too much by accident? Or maybe mixed things she shouldn’t have but didn’t realize it?”
I think about it for a moment, trying to remember if she took anything today. “I don’t know. It’s possible I guess, but I doubt it. She was feeling better this morning. At least she said she was.”
She did look better but obviously not well enough. I should have made her stay home, had someone be with her. I should have forced her to see a doctor the other day, like my gut fucking told me.
“Come on.” Cooper claps me on the shoulder. “Let’s go sit down. They’ll come to get us as soon as they can.”
Reluctantly, I follow him to the waiting room. He grabs coffee from the vending machine then hands me one of the steaming mugs. I end up putting it to the side when the first sip settles like lead in my stomach.
“So, Sophie, huh?” he remarks, taking the seat across from me.
“Yeah.” His expression remains impassive but I know better. “Look, I just found out myself. She’s not ready for people to know yet, and I wasn’t going to betray her trust.”
But I went and fucked that up tonight.
“I know who she is. I always have.” His confession doesn’t really surprise me. “I just don’t know the whole story, but I imagine you do now?”
I nod but don’t offer more.
“I’ll need to know about it eventually. Otherwise, I can’t help.”
“She can tell you herself when she’s ready.”
“Fair enough.”
The conversation ceases when other people walk into the waiting room and take seats. Heavy silence fills the air as minutes turn into hours. I do everything to distract myself. From checking in with Benny to texting my sister, but nothing helps. Nothing calms the cold hard fear paralyzing me. Fear that I may never see her again. The only girl who has ever been able to penetrate my walls and breathe life into my dead heart.
Time eventually comes to a standstill, driving me to the brink of fucking insanity. Nurses have come and gone from her room but they won’t tell me a damn thing. If I don’t get answers soon, I’ll tear the place apart. When another nurse walks out, Cooper orders me to stay put while he speaks with her. Only then do we finally get answers.
The nurse glances over at me nervously before talking to Cooper. His expression becomes more somber with every second that passes, his brows drawing together in worry.
Oh shit!
His gaze shifts to mine as he lifts his chin to signal me over.
Dread makes each step heavy and weak. “What’s going on? Is she okay?”
“She’s stable,” the nurse says, sending an explosion of relief through me. “She’s tired and a little disoriented but she’s going to be okay.”
“I want to see her.”
Her eyes dart away. “Usually we only allow family in at a time like this.”
“Well, she doesn’t have any fucking family here. I’m the closest thing she has to one.”
She nods. “That’s what Sheriff McKay has said and she has been asking for you but—”
“She’s been asking for me and no one has come to get me?” A deep-seated anger begins to burn inside of me. Without waiting for a response, I charge for her room.
“Wait. The doctor wants to speak with her in private,” she protests, but I don’t stop and barge through the door.
My swift feet falter at the sight of her. She’s hooked up to a bunch of machines, her delicate body fragile and broken—close to shattering at any given moment. Her sunken eyes swing to mine, the smallest smile touching her dry lips.
“Kolan,” she whispers, her voice shaky and weak.
A painful breath shreds my chest as I move for her. Grabbing her hand with the IV in it, I bend down and press a kiss to her forehead. I notice her scarf is gone but most of her hair surrounds the scars. She wraps an arm around my neck to pull me in close but it lacks strength.
“I’m so sorry I ruined your night,” she says, her voice thick with guilt.
“I’m the one who’s sorry, Soph. I should have made you stay home and rest.”
“No. It’s not your fault. I really was feeling a little better this morning.”
Our exchange comes to an end when someone clears their throat. “If you don’t mind, I was speaking with my patient.”
Standing, I look over at the doctor, wondering what the fuck his problem is when it’s clear he has one.
“I’m sorry, Dr. Corrigan. I tried to stop him,” the nurse apologizes. “Do you want me to call security?”
“Security?” Sophie squeaks in alarm.
“No one’s calling security,” Cooper cuts in, not bothering to hide his annoyance. It matches the burning one inside of me.
Sophie’s hand squeezes mine with a little more strength. “I don’t want him to leave.”
“Don’t worry, baby. I’m not going anywhere.” My eyes narrow at the doctor, daring him to challenge me.
“I think it’s best if I speak to you in private about the results of your blood work,” he says.
“Anything you have to say can be said in front of Kolan and Sheriff McKay. They’re friends of mine.”
Silence fills the room until the asshole finally relents with a tight nod. “Very well. Before we were interrupted, I had asked if you were on any prescription medications and you said no.”
“That’s right. I’m not.”
“Well, the results from your blood work say otherwise. There was a significant amount of DepoDur and Lorazepam found in your blood.”
“What’s that?” she asks the question before I can.
“Lorazepam is mostly found in anti-anxiety medicine such as Ativan and DepoDur in morphine.”
What the fuck?
“That’s impossible. There must be some sort of mistake.”
“I’m afraid it’s not.”
“But I’m not taking any medications. All I’ve had is aspirin this week from being sick. This doesn’t make any sense.”
“Could it be possible someone has been giving it to you without you knowing?”
Uneasiness settles in my gut.
“Of course not. I haven’t even been around anyone this week other than Kolan.”
When his eyes shift to me, rage ignites in my blood. His silence says it all.
A bitter laugh escapes me. “Unfuckingbelievable.”
Sophie looks up at me, confusion marring her pale face before she finally clues in. “Wait. You think Kolan did this?”
“That’s exactly what he thinks,” I grit.
It now makes sense why they didn’t want me near her. It shouldn’t surprise me that the blame is being misplaced once again. I swear, if I could be blamed for global fucking warming I would be.
“I’m only trying to figure out how this ended up in your system if you did not take it. It also wasn’t long ago that Mr. Slade was accused of hurting—”
“I’m going to stop you right there, Doctor,” Cooper says, his interruption stopping me from knocking this asshole out. “Any and all charges Kolan was facing months ago were dropped. Now, I agree that something is obviously going on here, and I will personally be looking into it. But I know whatever it is does not have to do with Kolan.”
I toss him an appreciative glance, a little surprised he had my back but damn thankful for it.
“Exactly,” Sophie bites out, her voice stronger than when I first walked in here. “He would never hurt me.”
A worry I didn’t realize I was carrying eases. Her opinion matters most to me, and obviously, it does look suspicious because I am the only one who has been around her all week.
Jesus, what the fuck is going on?
“Fair enough. I’ll leave this with you then, Sheriff,” the doctor says before looking back at Sophie. “I would like to keep you here overnight for observation. Just to make sure all is good before sending you home.”
She nods, her pale expression troubled. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Take care, Miss Kay.” He leaves without so much of a glance in my direction, a tense silence filling the room.
“This doesn’t make any sense,” Sophie whispers, looking up at me. “I’m still convinced it’s a mistake.”
I sit in the chair next to her bed and clasp her small hand between mine, wishing I had the answers for her, but I’m still trying to wrap my head around it all.
“Why don’t you get some rest, Sophie, and we’ll talk more about this tomorrow when you’re released,” Cooper suggests. She tenses at the use of her name, her eyes snapping to his. He gives her a sympathetic smile. “I’ve always known.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Because I hoped you would tell me when you were ready.”
“I’m sorry, Cooper,” she whispers, her words heavy with guilt.
“Don’t be. I understand why you did it but you don’t have to hide anymore. We’ll figure this out. Okay?”
She nods. “Thank you. For everything.”
“No problem.” His eyes move to me. “You need a ride?”
Sophie’s delicate fingers grip my hand.
“No. I’m staying here tonight.”
“I figured. I’ll see you both tomorrow then.”
After he leaves, I look back at Sophie, her troubled eyes fixated on me. “You didn’t have to stay,” she says. “But I’m really glad you are because I need you right now.”
“I’m here, baby. I’m not going anywhere.”
Her hand moves to the side of my face. “You saved my life.”
“Nah. I didn’t do anything. But thanks to Cooper’s badass driving, we got you here much faster than the ambulance would have.” I pause, the last few hours crashing down on me full force. “You scared the hell out of me, Soph,” I breathe, my heart tearing apart at the thought of how I almost lost her.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault. It’s just…” I shake my head, trying to figure out how to explain to her that I felt like my life was ending with hers. Instead of admitting that, I brush her hair aside and bury my face in her neck, my lips resting on the very place she hates but I admire.
I feel her throat bob as she holds me close. “What’s happening, Kolan?”
I pull back to look at her and see fear shining bright in her eyes.
“It can’t be him,” she whispers. She doesn’t need to elaborate because we both know whom she’s talking about. I can’t deny it’s where my thoughts are right now and it has a dangerous rage brewing inside of me. “I would know if he was near. I would feel him. There’s no way I wouldn’t…right?”
“I don’t know, Soph. I don’t know what the fuck is going on, but I swear to you I’m going to find out. I won’t leave your side until we do.”
If it turns out he’s back and has done this to her, I will take his last fucking breath.