Chapter Twenty-Four
Sebastian
When Alrick asked if I would have him, I'd braced myself for his bite, but it didn't come. Instead, he'd held me tenderly, cuddled me close through the day, and, when I tentatively broached the subject the next evening, he'd kissed me breathless and assured me that he wasn't about to let me go, but he still hadn't claimed me.
As the first week passed and Alrick hadn't made any mention of the claim, I tried to ignore the panicked feeling growing in the pit of my stomach, the insecurity that told me that he hadn't really meant it. The second week passed, and I noticed that he wasn't around as much as he had been, that he frequently disappeared for hours on end with no warning or explanation and, when we were together, he wasn't as physical as I'd grown to expect from him. He also hadn't taken me to his bed again.
"Hey, Seb," Colby greeted me, depositing his daughter on the soft grass in front of me and joining me on the step I was lounging on. We watched Leia struggle to get her paws under her and then start sniffing around. "You look down."
"Yeah, a little, I guess," I agreed moodily, watching as the cute little white pup yipped excitedly and took off at as close to a run as her tiny, unsteady legs could manage, hot on the trail of something. "Um, is she okay?"
"Yep," Colby grinned proudly as Leia bumped into a rock, growled at it, and then worked her way past to keep running. "She's tough." He shifted slightly to keep her in sight. "So, what's on your mind?"
I hesitated for a minute and then the words began to tumble free. Colby listened without interrupting as I poured the whole story out.
"Hmm," he muttered under his breath. "Sounds like someone needs to teach that kid how to communicate."
I shrugged. What was I supposed to say to that?
"I'm pretty sure that he didn't mean to make the offer," I admitted. "I think he's a little impulsive sometimes."
Colby harrumphed but didn't comment, so I continued.
"Besides, its not like he lives here," I said with a sigh. "I'm not sure how I thought a claim with a rogue would work, anyway." I tried to smile. "So I guess I really need to find a way to let him know that I understand and we can still be friends."
Colby gave me a strange look. "It almost sounds like you'd rather he didn't claim you after all."
"What? No!" I rushed to disagree. "its just that I know I don't really have all that much to offer and, well, it seems pretty obvious that he lost interest." I tried to laugh it off. "Again. I must be more fun to chase than to catch."
"Well, I guess you ought to talk to him about it," Colby said slowly, turning to watch as Leia worked her way back to where we sat, dragging a gray rabbit almost twice her tiny size by one back leg. "Good job, pipsqueak but it's rude to hunt on Coruscation land without asking Uncle Clint first. You can let the bunny go, now." When she ignored him, he sighed and stood up. "I think I better take care of this."
***
Colby's words were still echoing in my ears when Alrick showed up at my dorm room unexpectedly a few hours later.
"Hi." He pulled me close as soon as the door opened and buried his face in my neck. "God, you smell good." He held me for a long moment and then pulled back. "Are you busy?"
I shook my head. "I think we should talk."
"Okay," Alrick looked at me curiously. "Can I come in?"
"Not here." I sucked in a deep breath. "Some place private."
"Oh." Alrick was starting to look concerned. "Okay. My cabin?"
I thought for a second. The cabin he'd been staying in was an old caretakers cottage that sat at the edge of the Coruscation territory so it wouldn't be too far to travel easily by foot after we talked.
I nodded and followed him out to the truck. At the cabin, Alrick frowned when I sat in the easy chair by the door instead of joining him on the couch. I took a deep breath and threaded my fingers together in my lap, only then noticing that I was shaking.
"What's on your mind?" Alrick asked, his brow creased. "You're scaring me."
"It's okay," I tried to reassure him. "I'm..it's just…"
Alrick's nostrils flared as my distress level spiked. "Seb.."
He stopped when I raised my hand. "Really, I'm fine." A small smile snuck through at the clearly disbelieving look Alrick sent me. " I am. This is just hard for me to say, is all."
Alrick sat back in his seat, and it was obvious that it was taking a lot for him to stay quiet.
"I..I know you changed your mind about…claiming me," I finally managed to get out. "Its okay. You don't have to keep spending time with me." I made myself meet his eyes. "I understand."
Finished speaking, I dropped my eyes again and wondered how long I had to sit in the strained silence before it was okay for me to leave. I didn't have long to wonder before Alrick broke the silence.
"I see." His voice was deceptively calm. "So you didn't actually want to talk, you wanted to break up." His deep, even breaths were the only sign that he was struggling to control himself.
"What? No." I shook my head vehemently. "I don't want that, but it's not about me." I brought my eyes up to his again. "Its not fair to you to be stuck with me just because you made an impulsive declaration about claiming me."
"Right." Alrick drew the word out. "Tell me why you think I'm stuck with you?"