(Emma)

Seemed like I would have the house all to my own for the night. I stripped down into just my underwear and a light t-shirt, it was so hot outside that wearing anything more than this even at night felt like too much.

I put my legs up by an open window, rubbing them and letting them breath from the cooler air coming in.

I poured myself a drink from Milly’s secret stash that she kept under the bed.

Well, “secret.” She was really bad at hiding things.

I opened my diary again, it had been so many years since I wrote anything in it. Felt so weird looking back at everything now, I wanted to jump through the pages and go back in time with everything I knew now. I wanted to grab my teenage self firmly by the shoulders and shake her until she made better choices. To think that if I had given it a little bit more effort my life could have been completely different.

I turned the page and saw Sven’s number staring right back at me. Even with the alcohol in my system I was thinking a little more clearly than before. Yeah he saved me but should I really reach out to him? What if I got hurt because I got involved in whatever gang activity he does. I really wanted to try and pretend that wasn’t who he was but deep down I knew that it was the truth.

“Why can’t I let myself have some fun, I’m sure he wouldn’t put me in any danger. Hell he’s already saved me from danger and I’m not even giving him a chance…”

I took out my phone and started putting it in my contacts list. “The least I could do is have that coffee with him I promised.”

Since I had my phone out I decided to do an internet search for the news story I had remembered that involved Sven’s gang. After a few minutes I found it; the “Freedom Riders.” For a gang based in Boston I guess that name would be fitting. A few of their members had gotten caught transporting crystal meth from Boston up t o Maine. Was that really what Sven’s gang did? I guess I shouldn’t be surprised but still.

“Just because his gang does that doesn’t mean that he does. He could just be in it for protection” I said trying to reassure myself as I took another sip of Milly’s vodka. I hated vodka but it was all I really had. Well I had wine but that was my wine, I wasn’t in the mood to break out my wine. I’d make it up to Milly though, I ain’t no thief.

I buried the thoughts about Sven into the back of my mind, I didn’t want to falsely accuse him of something without even knowing who he really was.

I went back to my diary, turning through the pages and stroking my ego with each paragraph that I read.

I turned to a red page, one about John, I knew I shouldn’t read about him but sometimes it was nice to put things into perspective and realize that he was no longer in my life. Even having a quiet house was a nice reminder that he was no longer here, back when I was graduating from high school John and my mom were going through the roughest parts of their relationship. I always tried to keep my head down when they were arguing, it would last for hours and hours, sometimes even throughout the night.

I remember when mom called me at college to cry about John finally leaving. I remember how mad she got at me when the only word I could mutter out was “good.” As if he didn’t cause pain for everyone in this family.

I turned to a random red page, I wrote it the morning after one of the nights John came into my room drunk. How he would wake me up by trying to pull my sweatpants down and I would just barely have the reaction time to kick him off of me.

Sometimes I’d hit him in the face with a hard kick, those were the few times where he’d be one and done, stumbling out of the room holding onto his bleeding nose or cut lip before falling asleep drunk in the hallway. Other times he’d come back and try to angrily take my clothes off of me, times like that was when Milly would come in and help me get him off of me. Despite all the resentment and jealousy I had for her because John never treated his blood daughter the way he treated me I always loved her for risking herself just to help me. Without her John would have succeeded.

I saw a car’s light shining through the front window of the house, I didn’t think much of it until it stayed there for a few minutes. We lived in a rural part of town so we didn’t really have any neighbors, it was very unusual to have a car parked outside of our house unless we had invited someone over.

I walked over to a nearby window, one where the light wasn’t coming in, and opened the blinds to see an all black car with black tinted windows parked outside. My heart started beating a little bit faster as the car just stayed there idling with its lights shining into the house. Maybe it was just Milly getting a ride home from someone?

I stood there for a few minutes, peeking out of the window and hoping that the car didn’t see me. I only had a few lights on inside the house so for the most part it would look like nobody was home if anyone was looking at it.

I took out my phone and was ready to call Milly to see if it was her but then the rear door of the car opened.

A tall man got out, it looked like he turned and said something to someone in the car but I couldn’t tell. It was so late out that I could only make out his outline but he didn’t look like anyone I knew. He walked up to the window that they were shining the light into and tried to peek inside, desperately trying to look around the blinds that we had down. From the light of the car I could see his face, he had long and shaggy hair with a skull tattoo on his forehead. He was wearing a leather jacket, when I squeezed my eyes I could make out one of the letters of the top row of words he had stitched; “E.” That really didn’t help much with figuring out the gang name it’s a goddamn vowel, I couldn’t even tell if it was the first letter of the word..

What the hell was he doing here? First Sven with his Freedom Riders and now this guy who’s gang I couldn’t even figure out? Was he also part of the Freedom Riders? “Freedom Riders” has E in it, several E’s! Several!

What was going on in this town? More importantly what was this guy doing in front of my house.

He walked up to the door and started banging on it. I was all alone with this man at my front door, with at least one other man in the car, and I had no means to protect myself and nobody expected to come home for the night.

I covered my mouth trying not to scream, his banging persisted as he tried again to look through the nearby windows. I was sitting here on the floor in fear in nothing but a pair of panties and a mostly see through t-shirt, I had no protection and no way to defend myself. If he broke inside I was done for.

I couldn’t believe I had to do this, but I was too afraid not to.

I had to call Sven, I needed him.