“Are there any places on your body that Colin and I need to avoid, Kylie?” I asked her as I leaned on the arm of the leather couch.

“No, Sir,” she replied.

“What is your safe word, Kylie?” Colin asked.

“Cotton, Sir.”

Colin and I nodded and repeated her safe word so she felt secure knowing that we had her safe word down.

“Bare handed spankings ok with you, Kylie?” Colin asked her.

“Yes, Sir. I really like those.”

Colin and I shared a glance and smiled. I already knew he wanted Kylie’s ass.

“Very well then. On the couch please, hands and knees,” I instructed.

Kylie quickly moved into position and waited. Colin undressed, rolled a condom on and lubed Kylie’s ass. I moved to the front of the couch, unzipped and pushed my pants down some. Taking a handful of Kylie’s hair in my hand, I tugged it back a bit.

“I love a firm tongue, Kylie,” I advised.

With that, Kylie went to work sucking and licking my cock and balls. I held her hair firmly in my hand. As she worked on me, Colin was spanking her ass cheeks as he fucked her ass. I closed my eyes, tilted my head back and enjoyed Kylie’s mouth.

Kylie’s head began bumping into my abdomen harder now, which told me that Colin was really working her ass over and that he was nearly ready to blow his load.

“Mmm! Fuck!” Colin moaned out.

Yep, he was coming. I was seconds away from coming when Kylie lost her balance and reached up for stability. Her hand grazed my side near my scar, and I jumped.

“Sorry, Master Anthony,” Kylie said.

I had taken a few steps back and out of her reach as she continued to accept Colin’s load. Though he was still buried in her ass, he was looking at me over her head. I had to focus, but my erection was gone. Kylie reached for my cock, but I shook her off.

After I pulled my jeans up, I sat on the arm of the couch and smoothed her hair as she began coming down from her orgasm. I could feel my heart pounding, and despite trying so hard to not think about anything but Kylie, I was struggling. Her fingertips left a hot trail where they had been on my side.

We took Kylie down to the care stations, and Colin rubbed some lotion on her ass cheeks. I was somewhat useless because I kept thinking about my scar and Connor and Bruce. I needed to shake them from my mind.

* * *

I had it all planned out and had rehearsed it over and over last night and while I got ready for school. Today was my birthday, and while I knew my mom and Bruce refused to celebrate it, it was still my birthday. I walked cautiously to the kitchen and set my backpack down and out of Bruce’s way. My mom was already drinking, and there was an empty bottle out on the counter, and she had a glass in her hand. I gathered up my courage and asked.

“Can I have a quarter today, please?”

She whirled around, stumbled and fell against the refrigerator, then fell to the floor. She started yelling at me and blamed me.

“Goddammit, Anthony! You little fuck! Why are you sneaking up on me?”

“I’m sorry, mom,” I said as I rushed over to help.

“Fucking useless little shit.”

I wasn’t useless. I hated it when she called me names.

I offered her my hands to help pull her up, and she accepted them. When she got up off the ground, she slapped me on the side of my head for sneaking up on her. I reached for my ear, and she grabbed me by my shirt and yanked it out of my pants.

“Well aren’t you a handsome little fuck today. Picture day?” she asked.

I shook my head and backed away from her while I tried to straighten my shirt. She forgot it was my birthday. I had put on my nicest shirt today because it was my birthday.

“What’s all the fucking noise!” Bruce yelled as he came into the kitchen.

I backed out of his way and tucked my shirt in.

“He’s got fucking pictures or something today. Little shit even combed his hair,” my mom slurred to Bruce.

I frowned because I always combed my hair. Every morning. Didn’t they ever look at me?

“You gonna smile big for your first grade picture?” Bruce laughed, and I could feel my anger building. “Don’t pee your pants before your picture. It would be really embarrassing because you have tan pants on. Everyone will see what a baby you are.”

I hated him.

“Shit, Bruce can you take him to school? I’ve had a few too many.”

“Fuck, get your ass in the car little shit.”

My quarter…I wanted a quarter for today. My mom was my only chance.

“Now, Anthony!” Bruce yelled and moved toward me, pulling his belt off as he walked.

I raced around the other side of the table, grabbed my backpack and ran to the car. I jumped in the front seat and pulled my seatbelt on. Bruce came outside and got in the car. My heart began to race because I hated being alone with him. I sat still and quietly for the drive and finally, I could see the school in the distance. I was almost there.

“Button up the next button on your shirt. The bruises are showing, Anthony,” Bruce said.

I looked down, and sure enough, the bluish marks were creeping out. I was so angry and said something out loud that I only meant to say in my head.

“I wouldn’t have to button it up if you didn’t hurt me.”

“What did you say, you little fuck?”

“Nothing. I’m sorry.”

Bruce reached over and punched me in the crotch and grabbed everything and squeezed until I cried out and pounded my fist on the door.

“Oh, Anthony. You’re going get it so bad when you get home today. I’d take your ass home right now, but I’m so mad at you I’d probably kill you.”

He squeezed me until we pulled up alongside the playground.

“Have a great day at school today, little fuck. Don’t be surprised if you get called to the principal’s office today. Smile big for your pictures.”

Bruce gave me one last hard squeeze and shoved me in the arm. I got out of the car as calmly as I could, and as he drove away, I doubled over with my hands on my knees. My stomach and balls hurt a lot. I walked through the gates to the playground and carefully moved along the fence of the playground until I got to a corner and sat down.

I pulled my knees close to my chest, set my backpack on my shoes and held my hand over my aching crotch. No one could see though since my backpack blocked it. When the bell rang, I scoured the ground for a quarter on my way to the line but didn’t find one. I stood in line with my head down, and a hand over my stomach.

The doors opened, and the teachers were coming out to greet their students and Connor was with them.

Please, no!

My teacher strolled down our line, and when she got to me, she smiled brightly.

“Happy Birthday, Anthony,” my teacher said and presented me with a birthday sticker.

She peeled it from the paper backing and pressed it onto my shirt. She put it over one of the spots on my chest that hurt. I was almost sure it was on the spot that was black and blue.

I tried to smile, but my stomach hurt so bad. She crouched down in front of me and put her hands on my arms.

“Oh, sweetie, what’s wrong?” she asked. “Is your tummy upset?”

I shook my head, lying. I think she could tell. She felt my head as Connor stood by. I risked glancing up at him, but I couldn’t read his expression.

“Anthony, sweetie you’re shaking,” my teacher said.

“Is he feverish?” Connor asked.

“He doesn’t feel warm, but his skin is clammy. Maybe we should send him to the nurse.”

No! I spoke up because I couldn’t land in the nurse’s office. All I could get out was, “No,” and then it happened; I had an accident. My face was on fire, and I looked down at my shoes when I heard my teacher say, “Oh, sweetie.” Connor laughed and said, “Oops, it’s ok, sport.”

They mumbled to one another, and I quickly pulled my backpack off and held it in front of my pants before any of the other kids saw. Why do I keep doing this? None of the other kids do this.

“Sweetie, the principal will take you up to the nurse’s office to change and then we’ll see you in class.”

Connor put his hands on the back of my neck around the collar of my shirt, and we stood off to the side as my class went inside. Once all the kids had gone inside, he guided me to the door, and we headed inside.

“Did you forget that you had to go to the bathroom, Anthony?” he asked me.

“I guess so. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t forget that the bathrooms by the lunchroom are opened before the bell.”

I nodded and trudged awkwardly down the hall with him and followed him into the nurse’s office.

“We had a little accident this morning,” Connor said to the nurse.

“Good morning, Anthony. I think we have a fresh pair of your pants and clean underwear. Do you need help sweetie?” she asked me.

“I will help him,” Connor told her.

Oh god.

The nurse gestured us to the larger bathroom and handed Connor my clean pants, underwear, and some baby wipes. Clearly, I’m a baby. The bathroom door closed and Connor motioned for me to change out of my wet clothes and then he handed me the baby wipes. My hands shook as I cleaned myself up under Connor’s watchful eyes. I was surprised, but he didn’t touch me, he just watched me.

He put my wet clothes in a few bags and the nurse reminded me to come get my clothes after school today. Then Connor led me to his office and pointed at the chair opposite his desk.

“Sit. Bruce called me this morning. Seems you two had an altercation in the car.”

I nodded. I had to remember I was at school and he’s my principal. I can’t get mouthy here.

“I shouldn’t have said what I said to him in the car.”

I wiped my eyes.

“He said your mother was too drunk to bring you to school.”

I nodded.

“Go back to class, Anthony. Be mindful of your bladder.”

“Yes, sir.”

I struggled to concentrate all morning and was relieved when lunch came. I sat with my classmates at lunch and watched most of them eat and talk.

“Can you pass this down to the trash, Anthony?” Jamie handed me an apple.

“You don’t want this?” I asked her.

“No.”

“Can I have it?” I asked.

She nodded, and I quickly ate the apple. All of the kids were eager to get outside to the playground. Which, if I had my quarter, I would have been happy too. As our table was dismissed, I was in no hurry to go outside. My balls still ached, and it hurt to walk much.

Eventually, I went outside and saw the flurry of kids lined up by tons of tables. It was Bake Sale Day. Normally I don’t care for these things because I never have money. But today was my shot to get a cupcake for my birthday. Lots of parents and teachers were behind the tables and handling the exchange of money.

From the edge of the grass, I lingered, looking at all the treats that lined the tables. Everything was a quarter, and I spotted the cupcakes. I wanted one so bad. Kids always talked about getting cake or cupcakes for their birthday, and many times their parents bring in cupcakes for the class when it was their kids’ birthday. But I’ve never had cake or a cupcake on my birthday. My mom refuses to remember my birthday. I began looking in the grass for a quarter. Maybe I’d get lucky.

“Anthony,” an adult called my name.

I looked around and saw that it was my teacher. She was waving her arm in the air at me, and I hurried over even though it hurt to rush over. She told me to pick out a cupcake. I shook my head.

“You don’t like cupcakes?”

“I do. I didn’t bring any money today. I…forgot it in my room,” I lied.

“It’s your birthday, Anthony. Have a cupcake.”

I stared at them in awe, but then I began worrying that Connor would find out I had a cupcake that I didn’t pay for. Then I’d get it even worse than what was going to happen to me tonight.

“I can’t pay. I can’t have anything I don’t pay for.”

“Anthony, it’s a birthday pass. Since it’s your birthday, you get a cupcake.”

I smiled and picked the biggest chocolate cupcake with vanilla frosting that I could find. It had sprinkles on it too. I thanked my teacher and sat under a tree with it. I hummed the Happy Birthday jingle in my head and ate it in four bites. It was so good.

I dreaded going home and the second I got home, it started. I don’t even remember how I ended up in my bed, but I woke up close to midnight from stomach pain. My stomach and legs had long, thick red lines going in lots of directions. I didn’t understand what they were. I just knew they hurt and when I touched them, they felt really hot.

I woke up from the dream, but I wasn’t startled or panicked like many times. This was just a shitty dream. I glanced at my plush football on the nightstand and sighed as I held my hand over my chest.

Today is my birthday and the first one without my dad. Granted, he wasn’t around for any of them when I was little, but the last few years I had him. Last year we hadn’t spent my actual birthday together because I was out in Vegas at Irons, but the following weekend I flew up to see him, and we went to a Giants baseball game. I still had each of the birthday cards he had given me since 1991. I have a lot of fond memories too.

After having spent two hours walking around the Luxor this morning, playing video poker and watching basketball highlights in the sports book, I had a pancake breakfast in the café. Finally, I made it to work and met Colin in the atrium for coffee. He was already seated and sipping on his coffee when I sat down.

“Hey, man,” he greeted me. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you look like shit.”

“Good. I spent a few extra minutes to make sure I perfected the ‘looking like shit’ look,” I jabbed back sarcastically.

I really was feeling down, and my face probably couldn’t hide it. I needed to keep this under control and not bring Colin down. I decided to let him enjoy the paper and his coffee.

“I’m going to head up to my office and work on the first quarter reports,” I said and stood.

Colin looked surprised and set the paper down.

“I’m sorry about the ‘looking like shit’ comment. You ok?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I didn’t sleep well and just have some stuff on my mind. Getting busy with work will be good for me.”

He nodded, and I grabbed my coffee and headed to my office. Sometimes I forget I’m the CFO now and will go left towards my old cubicle when I get off the elevator instead of veering to the right toward my office. On my way, I was hit by many of the morning greetings that the ladies often throw at me. They feed my ego, but this morning I just didn’t have the energy to flash a smile or wink at them.

“Happy Birthday, Mr. Graves,” Hannah, my secretary said.

I stopped in my tracks. I didn’t want anyone to know it was my birthday.

“How did you know?”

“It’s on the calendar, sir.”

“The calendar?”

“Human Resources sends out a daily birthday email.”

Shit.

“I know, I’ve seen them. I just thought that was for people who volunteered to give out their birthday info,” I said.

I went into my office and shut the door. I’m hoping that with my door being shut it’ll keep birthday well-wishers away. Around 11:30, Colin came in and sat down in front of my desk.

“Let’s go. It’s lunchtime,” he said.

I nodded and grabbed my keys; it was my turn to drive. He talked sports with me on our way, but when we sat down for lunch, the conversation shifted some and I hadn’t been prepared for it.

“Lots of people hate celebrating their birthdays. You know, they’re a whole year older and stuff,” he started.

I nodded and sipped on my Coke. I think Colin was trying to get me to elaborate on why I wasn’t fond of my birthday. I wasn’t going to though. He didn’t need to know what truly had me down.

“It’s your first birthday without your dad,” Colin said quietly.

Fuck me.

I was glad we were sitting outside and I was hiding behind my sunglasses, just in case I wasn’t fully in control of my emotions.

“You’re still very young, so I didn’t think that you were upset over the age thing.” Colin joked, and I smiled even though I felt the ache in my chest gathering strength. Colin leaned back in his chair and sipped from his water glass. “I turned ten for my first birthday without my parents and my brother. Fucking sucked. I hated the world. I didn’t want anyone to say anything to me on my birthday. It had been a tradition in my house that on our birthday, my dad and Matt’s dad would take us and some friends to see a Giants game. I didn’t want to go that year when I turned ten, but Matt’s dad insisted. He said it would be good for me and that my dad and brother would be there in spirit with me.” Colin paused and took another drink from his glass. “I went, and I cried throughout the game and leaned on Matt’s dad’s arm. We went the following year when I turned eleven, and I still cried. I think it wasn’t until my twentieth birthday before I could get through a game without crying or getting watery eyes.”

Colin and I laughed a little.

“The heartache gets better with time, Anth.”

I nodded and took a deep breath. My chest felt like a car was parked on it. It was heavy, and I felt like I could be crushed under it at any given moment. Blake has said this to me as well, though I hadn’t believed him. It wasn’t that I thought he was lying to me, but was skeptical that this ache will ever go away.

“Did you and your dad do fun stuff on your birthday?” he asked.

“Yeah. Well, sort of. I hadn’t seen my dad for my birthdays when I was little. When I moved in with him during my senior year of high school, we did stuff together.”

Colin smiled and nodded along.

“I won’t get all college-girl chatty with you, but I just wanted you to know that I remember what my first birthday was like without them. I know what you’re feeling, and I know you’ve got a rock sitting on your chest today,” he said.

I was quickly losing control of my watery eyes and took another deep breath and looked away before the tears embarrassed me. Colin seemed to understand exactly how I was feeling. It was great that he knew, but I didn’t need to say anything about it.

Colin paid the bill for lunch, and as we got up from the table to head to the parking lot, he flung his arm around my shoulder and squeezed my upper arm.

“Heavy heart day, Anth.”

On our way back, he nonchalantly asked me if I liked cupcakes.

“I do.”

“Good, because there’s a strong chance that the ladies at work have thrown together cupcakes for your birthday.”

“What? They didn’t have to do that.”

“Oh, trust me, they were more than happy to. A slew of them came to me this morning asking if they could organize a quick afternoon gathering. I knew you weren’t feeling too hot today, so I asked them to keep it low key.”

I laughed at the thought of all these women who seem to “love” me. If they only knew I had nothing to give, they’d learn. They’d learn quickly that I’m a shell of a man that would never be able to give any of them anything other than quick, earth-shattering sex.

Around 2:00, Colin came into my office to take me to my little party.

“Come on birthday boy. It’s cupcake time.”

I followed him out into the main area and saw a few balloons and on a large table were cupcakes. The table was surrounded by the several women who put this together. I looked down, and the cupcakes had bear faces on them. Not scary bears but a goofy faced bear grinning. A UCLA Bruin looking bear. I turned and looked at Colin, and he shrugged his shoulders as if he were innocent.

“You ladies came up with these bears on your own?” I playfully asked.

“We had a little help, Mr. Graves,” one of the red-cheeked ladies replied.

Another lady pushed a closed pink bakery box toward me.

“Mr. Everett said for us to get these special for you,” another lady said.

I opened the bakery box and laughed. Inside were six cupcakes and they were decorated with either dark blue frosting or white frosting, and in yellow or blue icing it either said: “Cal” or “Bears” on it.

“Yeah! Now you guys are talking,” I said and pulled out a “Cal” cupcake.

Colin stood next to me and ate his goofy face bear cupcake that was decorated with UCLA colors.

“Thanks, man,” I said as I shoved the cupcake in my mouth.

“You didn’t think I was going to make you eat Bruin decorated cupcakes, did you?” Colin said.

“I wasn’t sure.”

We stood around with the employees and ate cupcakes, and I took the remaining ones to my office. Colin followed me with what appeared to be a ball that was wrapped up, and he tossed it to me after I set the cupcakes down. I tore the paper off and stared at an orange foam ball with “Cal Bears” stamped on it. It was about the size of a basketball, and I tossed it in the air.

“This is great, thank you. You didn’t have to do this though; the cupcakes and ball.”

“Cupcakes were a must. It’s part of the job. The ball, on the other hand, I thought that was right up your alley.”

Colin and I wasted the afternoon away sitting in my office, eating cupcakes, and talking about some of the unattached subs and bottoms at Irons. I never thought I’d have a friend; like a really good friend to laugh or watch a game with. Colin and I were becoming good friends, and I started to feel a little better the longer I sat there laughing with him.

“So, dinner and Irons tonight?” Colin asked.

“You already bought me lunch, cupcakes, and a ball. Now you want to buy me dinner and take me to get my rocks off?” I asked him.

We both burst out laughing. It has to be all the sugar I’ve ingested. Colin threw my foam ball at my chest, which made us laugh harder.

“I’m not buying you dinner; Matt is.”

“Does Matt know he’s buying me dinner?”

“Not yet.”

I was high on sugar. Everything was hilarious to us. Colin looked at his watch, and I apologized for taking up most of the afternoon doing unimportant things.

“This was important, Anth. So, it’s 4:30 now. Go home, change and meet us at Vito’s Restaurant at 7:00. You and I can tie up that little caramel colored hair bottom tonight.”

I laughed at his description of one of the submissives.

“Caramel colored hair,” I tried containing my laughter. “What, are you some hair stylist color expert?”

“Details, my dear Anthony. It’s all in the fine details,” Colin pretended to have a serious tone but failed miserably when he laughed.

As he headed out of my office, I threw the foam ball at his back and hit him square between the shoulder blades. He pointed at me with the ball and lobbed it back to me.

“You started a war there, birthday boy.” I laughed and shook my head. “See you at seven, Anth.”

I nodded and quickly shut down my computer and headed home. I was feeling so much better than I had been today.

By dinner, the sugar had worn off, and I was ready for real food. The three of us took our seats, and Matt asked how the office birthday bash went.

“I was surprised! And he didn’t make me eat one of those UCLA Bruin cupcakes,” I said to Matt.

While I was talking about the cupcakes, Blake approached the table. I had no idea he was going to be here too.

“Good, I didn’t miss dinner,” Blake said as he put his hand on my shoulder before sitting down by Matt. “Happy Birthday, Anthony.”

“Thanks! I didn’t know you were coming tonight,” I said to Blake.

Blake smiled and glanced at Colin before looking at me. He pointed to Colin and said, “Better keep your eye on this one...he’s a sneaky organizer.”

Colin’s a great friend. I now know what it’s like to have a real friend. I didn’t know what to say, so I just smiled and nodded.

“So, what’s the plan tonight, gentlemen?” Blake asked us.

“Anth and I are going to take that little caramel colored hair girl down into the depths of the dungeon tonight,” Colin said.

“She does have a name,” Matt pointed out. “But now that I think about it, I’m not sure what it is.”

The four of us laughed, and Blake said that her name was Ella. I nodded and would try to remember that for tonight. I hope she’s there. I haven’t had my tongue in Ella before, and the thought of it filled my mind during dinner.

An hour later, and after a giant piece of chocolate cake, my tongue was buried in Ella. As Colin and I walked out of the dungeon stall with Ella, Paul was leaning against a stone pillar in the hallway. Our eyes connected as he approached me. Colin and Ella continued to the care stations, but I stopped. Mostly, I stopped so that he wouldn’t follow us to the care stations.

“Master Graves,” Paul sneered. “In need of that beating yet? Maybe a birthday spanking.”

What a fucking dick. I didn’t flinch or show any sign that he was intimidating me. Instead, I wiped my mouth with my hand, making sure he caught my non-verbal reminder that I’m the one negotiating scenes while he’s watching me scene.

“Too bad you’re so caught up in me. You’re missing out on some fantastic pussy,” I said smugly and walked away from him.

“God, you’ve got a mouth on you, Graves. Someone should teach your ass some manners. If you were my slave, I’d beat you daily,” Paul said just loud enough to me to hear as I walked away. I could have kept walking but he threw gas on the fire. “I think the father you ache for should have beat your ass. A fucking spoiled prince is all you are, Graves. Your daddy raised a fucking spoiled prince.”

I turned and walked right up to him. There was barely a foot of space between us. I tried so hard to calm down.

“Don’t say a fucking thing about my father. You don’t know a goddam thing about my dad…or me.”

“I know you’re a spoiled boy who misses his daddy and desperately needs a rough, physical session.”

Stunned, I stood there staring at him. Suddenly, an arm flung around my shoulder. I jumped a little because it surprised me. It was Colin. He tugged me to walk away with him.

As we walked away, Colin shook me a bit as we approached the bench that Ella was sitting on. Paul walked behind us and said, “I see. You submit to the Casino Man.”

Colin turned to face Paul the same time I did.

“I don’t submit to anyone,” I firmly said.

“Please excuse us, Paul. But Anthony and I need to tend to the submissive we scened with tonight.”

I motioned for Ella to stand and the three of us made it to the care stations. I detested Paul. What’s worse, I hate how his words affect me. I need to pay zero attention to him. I didn’t submit to Colin, and I’m certainly not submissive. I can’t tell if Paul is just fucking with me, trying to get me to think I’m submissive…or if he really thought I was submissive.

The fact that I thought of that shit while providing after care bothered me to no end. After Ella went home and Colin and I had our wind-down time at the bar, I went home as well.