Chapter 29
‘I swear to God, if they don’t let me pee soon, I’m going to lose my rag!’ Holly said through gritted teeth that evening. It was all very well asking her to drink two whole litres of water before her scan, but the pressure on her bladder was now excruciating and bringing her to the verge of tears.
Taffy quietly and discreetly put down his cup of coffee for fear of making any sloshing noise that would tip Holly over the edge. ‘I could go and ask how long the wait might be?’ he suggested, also clearly out of his comfort zone but for different reasons.
Holly shook her head, attempting a smile that looked more like a grimace, trying to put Taffy at ease. After all, this was a happy day and she may have done the whole pregnancy fandango before, but she had to remind herself that this was an entirely new experience for him, sitting in a roomful of pregnant women, the air thick with pheromones and emotion.
‘They don’t make you wait with a full bladder on purpose,’ Holly reassured him. ‘If they had to rush somebody in ahead of us with an emergency, then we simply have to wait. And a full bladder gives us a much better view, so—’ She squirmed in her seat and pulled at the ever-tightening waistband of her jeans. Well, not technically her jeans, but the pair she’d given in and bought on the cheap in a larger size, when she couldn’t quite bring herself to buy maternity clothes just yet. She saw it with her patients all the time: the first pregnancy, they were into the jersey-panelled jeans almost as soon as the stick turned blue, excited and full of anticipation; the second time around, they clung to their ‘normal’ clothes, their hard-won denim jeans, as long as it was feasible to sit down. By the third pregnancy, she’d noticed without judgement, their ‘normal’ clothes were still maternity clothes. She wondered where she fell on this spectrum, having popped out two bouncing baby boys in one go.
She gave a slight shudder. ‘Popped out’ didn’t really do justice to the marathon labour and paralysing fear of her first delivery that had ended in an emergency C-section. At least that was one decision off the table, she thought with relief; nobody would be pushing her to have a traditional birth after that fiasco. Frankly they’d been lucky to all escape unscathed.
‘Holly? Holly Graham?’
She looked up expectantly, a surge of relief that this discomfort would soon be over and she’d be allowed to have a wee – oh, and she’d get to see her baby too, she corrected herself. But there was no lovely smiling nurse with a clipboard to appease her pain.
Jemima Hallow stood in front of her, her ever-expanding bump encased in a tent of striped linen and a look of embarrassment on her face. ‘Oh God, I’m so sorry, I bet you thought you were being called and the purgatory was almost over.’ Jemima fidgeted from one foot to the other. ‘Nobody warns you, do they?’
Taffy gallantly stood up to offer Jemima his seat in the crowded waiting room. ‘Hi, Mims,’ he said, kissing her on both cheeks. ‘You’re looking well.’
Jemima snorted at the GP’s tact and diplomacy. ‘If by well you mean a chipmunk that swallowed a beach ball, then thank you.’ She turned to Holly, virtually dancing in excitement, although to be fair she was probably just desperate for a wee. ‘Oh, I’m so thrilled to see you here! Don’t worry, my lips are sealed but ooooh—’ She clapped her hands together. ‘I couldn’t be happier. How far along are you? No wonder you were so supportive of our little protest. And you can join us officially now!’ She breathed for a moment. ‘Although obviously you’re keeping it under wraps, or the whole of Larkford would know already.’ Jemima on full excitement was an unstoppable barrage of enthusiasm.
Holly laughed – there was something infectious about Jemima’s bouncy zeal for everything in life. In fact, ever since Mims had married Rupert, their local vet, Holly had been struck by what a lovely couple they made. Seeing them through their battles with infertility had only cemented that opinion. ‘It’s early days for us yet,’ Holly confided, truly delighted to share the news; it was killing her not to be shouting it from the rooftops, but nevertheless caution had prevailed, just in case. ‘We haven’t even got a due date confirmed.’
‘Well, once you’re through the pukey stage, give me a call and we can have a cuppa and a natter one day.’ Jemima stood up, unable to sit still for long. ‘This GP’s a lovely chap, but he doesn’t have a clue about the mood swings.’ She gave Taffy a twinkly smile and patted his arm. ‘Although I imagine that might change soon.’
‘Mood swings?’ Taffy queried, looking sideways at Holly. ‘We’re not going to bother with those, are we, Holls?’
The two women looked at each other and smiled. ‘No, I thought we’d definitely opt out,’ Holly replied reassuringly.
‘We’re ready for you now, Dr Graham,’ the nurse interrupted them, ‘if you’d like to follow me.’
Holly leapt to her feet, amusing Taffy no end with the undignified walk she needed to adopt, simply to avoid weeing herself. Yup, Holly decided, this whole pregnancy was going to be one steep learning curve for her gorgeous fiancé.
Taffy held open the door to the sonography suite, solicitously making sure that Holly was settled. He barely perched on the edge of the seat beside her, fidgeting in anticipation. ‘Why do I feel so nervous?’ he asked Holly in a whisper.
She reached across and squeezed his hand. ‘Because this matters. And it’s exciting. You’re going to be a dad.’ No matter how hard he blinked, Holly could tell that Taffy was already wearing his emotions on his sleeve. She couldn’t wait to see the look on his face when they heard the heartbeat for the first time. In fact – she shifted slightly on the bed, turning to look at him rather than the screen. She wanted to make sure she was fully in the moment herself – no distractions, no squinting at the screen with her doctor’s hat on. She wanted this moment to be etched in her memory for ever.
Holly gave a slight shiver; she would never get used to that first chill of the jelly on her tummy no matter how many scans she had.
‘You okay?’ Taffy asked, gripping her hand a little tighter and not missing a trick.
Holly nodded. ‘I’m nervous now too.’ She turned to smile at the sonographer, who was routinely clicking away at the screen, seemingly oblivious to the momentousness of the occasion for them, as indeed it must be for every couple through her door.
‘And when did you say your last period was?’ the sonographer asked, frowning as she angled the screen slightly away from them, so they couldn’t see the images even if they wanted to.
Holly felt a tiny flicker of alarm, but nevertheless duly ran through the dates yet again in her head, convinced that their treehouse escape had been their only real opportunity for conception.
‘Okay, then just bear with me one moment.’ The sonographer stood up and walked to the door.
‘Quick,’ whispered Holly, a sudden wave of anxiety roiling in her stomach, ‘look at the screen.’ She was lying on her back, with paper sheets tucked into her pants and the conductive jelly glistening on her tummy; she herself was going nowhere fast.
Taffy, though unencumbered, stared at her blankly. Frozen to the spot, he looked from Holly to the machine to the door swinging closed. ‘But I—’ he began, worry darkening his eyes as the possible ramifications of this sudden scuffle sank in.
The door swung open again and Holly’s ob/gyn walked into the room with an easy smile. ‘Well, you two obviously have more restraint than I do. I had a tenner on the table you’d have grabbed a sneaky peek.’ His smooth banter and Irish charm always put Holly at ease and the tiny, protective part of her brain that had switched to high-alert paused for a moment. Would Cormack O’Brien really be this upbeat if there was actually something on that screen to worry about? Nevertheless her grip on Taffy’s hand tightened imperceptibly.
Cormack flipped the tails of his jacket backwards like a concert pianist as he settled on the sonographer’s stool as she herself remained standing, murmuring in a low voice and pointing at the screen. Cormack looked up and gave them both a reassuring smile. ‘Don’t go getting worried, there’s no cause for alarm – we just need to double-check a few measurements. There’s a chance your dates are a little off.’
‘Jesus,’ muttered Taffy, breathing out in a rush and scowling at the sonographer, ‘is that all?’ He stood up and hovered awkwardly.
Cormack clicked so many times on the screen that Holly began to wonder if he was playing Solitaire on there. ‘Cormack?’ she prompted, after a few minutes had passed in silence.
‘Right, yes. Sorry about that. Just wanted to make sure we’d got all the information we needed.’ He swivelled around on his stool and smiled. ‘Grab yourself a seat there, Taffy, and I can talk you through.’ He cleared his throat. ‘Well, firstly, you’re quite a bit further along than we’d originally thought. Not that unusual to have a little breakthrough bleeding and mistake it for your period. Your measurements suggest you’re actually at sixteen weeks already, so no wonder you’ve been feeling so tired and emotional. Obviously that means it’s a bit too late to do some of the pre-natal testing we’d normally do, nuchal folds and suchlike, but from what I can see on the screen there is nothing to worry about unduly.’
Taffy leaned in to kiss Holly lovingly on the forehead as they both exhaled in relief. ‘Not so long to wait after all.’ He swallowed hard. ‘And we can tell people now too, Doc, yes? How great is that, Holls? It’s official – we’re having a baby!’ He batted away the tears that were threatening to spill over onto his cheeks and sniffed. ‘Can we hear the heartbeat, Doc?’ They were both poised for the main event but Cormack hesitated.
‘There is just one other thing I should probably mention . . .’ Cormack said, a nervous smile on his face as he turned the monitor slowly towards them. ‘You’re having twins.’
‘Oh my God!’ gasped Taffy, giving up all pretence of calm. He leapt to his feet and pulled Holly into his arms. ‘You beauty—’
Holly laughed, partly from relief that all was well, partly in shock at this latest bombshell. Hearing those words out loud made her well up, not in fear, or trepidation, or even just excitement, but with a deep-seated feeling that this was all meant to be. Her and Taffy and their four children. Her family would at last feel complete.
‘Taffs—’ she managed, laughter trembling behind her words. ‘We’re having two babies—’ She kissed him gently on the lips, tasting the salt of their tears mingling together.
Cormack chortled happily beside them, swinging from side to side on the sonographer’s stool. ‘Well that does tend to be the definition of twins. But this can’t have come as a complete surprise?’
Holly paused for a moment, still trying to adjust to the seismic shift in her life – you’d think she might have realised. She shook her head. ‘I was utterly convinced this time felt different.’
‘Well, it probably doesn’t help to say that every pregnancy is a little different. Maybe it’s down to how you feel about the pregnancy, or indeed the make and model you’re working on. Shall we take a closer look?’ Cormack was like a kid at Christmas, whizzing through all the fancy toys on his ultrasound machine. To be fair, thought Holly, he probably only got summoned to the sonography suite for the problem cases – it must be quite a pleasant change to be in here for a celebration. Not to mention two parents who were seemingly unfazed by the prospect of a multiple birth.
But then perhaps she’d spoken too soon. She felt rather than saw Taffy sink into his chair, eyes wide and unblinking. ‘There’s two babies in there, Holls,’ he said, staring at the screen. He tilted his head to get a better view and Holly followed suit. The two babies were curled around each other, like a mini yin-yang symbol, and Holly could see their tiny fingers flexing, almost as though waving to her.
With a flick of a switch, fast butterfly beats filled the room in stereo and she was spellbound. ‘They’re so fast,’ she murmured, still somehow surprised.
‘Jesus,’ said Taffy, still entranced by the screen. ‘Two little people in there,’ he repeated. ‘No wonder you’ve been tired.’
Cormack guffawed. ‘Just wait until they get here!’
Holly felt a moment’s unease – how on earth were they going to juggle two newborn babies, two excitable boys and two careers? Something was clearly going to have to give. A twang of elastic as Holly shifted slightly to get a better view of the screen made her laugh out loud – at least it was her knicker-elastic not her sanity. So far anyway.
‘Can you tell what sex they are?’ she asked, feeling a sudden impatience to be holding her babies, to feel those tiny hands clasping around her fingers, and to watch Taffy meet his children. ‘Are they identical or fraternal?’
Cormack clicked the screen again, enlarging parts of the image for them to see. ‘It looks to me as though they each have their own placenta, so it’s more suggestive of fraternal, but as you know, about a third of the time that’s also true for identicals. On the other hand, fraternals do run in your family, do they not?’ He chuckled. ‘I still can’t believe you had no idea! And you a doctor!’ He clicked again. ‘Are you quite sure you want to know the sex?’
‘Yes,’ said Taffy fervently, at least three shades paler than when he’d entered the room. ‘I mean, that might answer the twin question too.’
Cormack pulled up several images from different angles. ‘Well, there’s a possibility of one little girl in there, but it’s far from clear. I certainly wouldn’t bank on it. And I’m afraid her womb-mate is giving nothing away. I guess you’re in for a surprise.’
He clicked ‘print’ and a scroll of photographs began emerging from the top of the machine. He smiled at Holly and Taffy. ‘I’d say congratulations and a few lie-ins are in order. Pop next door with me now and we’ll run a few basic checks and get you booked in for a delivery date.’
Holly took one last look at the screen and slowly sat up, her hand automatically resting on her stomach. Two babies. In only four or five months’ time. The ground seemed to shift beneath her feet as she went to stand up and she sat back heavily. ‘Oh my God, Taffy,’ she said, ‘we’re having twins!’
Cormack shook his head in amusement. ‘I thought you were altogether too cool about this.’
Holly had reached the stage of shock where blinking was a challenge, just as Taffy seemed to be bouncing back.
‘There’ll be four children in our house before Christmas!’ Holly whispered, a ball of excited tears blurring her words.
Taffy stopped, her statement so much more a reality than a grainy image on a screen. His smile lit up the room. ‘Just as well we’re moving house then,’ he said gently, as they walked next door to pick a date that would change the rest of their lives together.