Chapter Thirteen
Archer
I woke up smiling and rested. The house was silent. When I got up to make my bed, I could see the boys on the TV screen, sleeping soundly. Abel had his face scrunched tight, and he was sucking on his little thumb. Andrew lay splayed out, over half my TV, taking deep breaths. I wanted to run in and grab them from the crib and show them the world, but I had to go to work. We were going to start testing Rick’s sensor prototype this morning, and I wanted to get there early so I could see how things panned out.
Mona was already in the nursery with the boys when I walked downstairs. I peeked my head in. “Good morning,” I whispered.
She walked out silently into the hall. “Did you drug them?” she asked.
“What are you talking about? No.”
“How come they’re not screaming their heads off?”
“Check them for track marks. I gotta go.”
“Do me a favor, will ya?”
“What’s that?” I asked.
“Try and use today to decide how not to be a dick on your second date.”
“Mona…”
“I tried those cookies you left here the other day. That girl has talent.”
“She does. You should’ve seen the people at the office. They’re already hooked.”
“You should get her to bring a box tomorrow, see if I can’t get me some of those almond clusters. Ugh, so good.” She clutched her stomach in mock distress.
“I’ll tell her, but I’m not hitting her up for any free products.”
“All right. Don’t kill yourself working today. Me and the boys will be fine.”
“Thanks.”
The trip to work went by fast. Two of the Navy higher-ups had their assistants call and ask for the details on the sensor test, which meant that they were already starting to show some interest in the project.
When I got to the warehouse, there were already two military vehicles parked out back and three decorated men standing in the corner. Rick was rushing around, telling the techs where to go and what to do. He noticed me walk up and excused himself.
“Did you see?” His enthusiasm was infectious. “They love it. I heard them talking. They’re already planning on making orders.”
“Really?” I was shocked. “They’re usually a lot more cautious about new projects.”
“That’s the thing. This isn’t new at all. We’re just repackaging the sensors, so they already know exactly what they’re going to get before they even test it out.”
“You probably just rose our stock one point with that sentence.”
“Nah, this ain’t shit. It’s just something to do while I’m bored. The real fun’s tomorrow night. Me and some of the guys are heading out to the club. You want to come along, pick up something nice and juicy for later?” He nudged me with his elbow.
“I can’t.”
“Why not? It’s not like you have a life or anything.”
“I have a date with Zoe.”
“The girl from the other night? Come on, man. What are you thinking?”
“I don’t know what to think about all this, and I don’t care, really. I just know I like her, and I want to see her again. I just have to take things slowly and see what happens.”
“That’s how you get hurt.”
“I know. I know.”
“Cancel on her. Come out with us.”
“I can’t. I don’t even think I could if I tried. She’s amazing, Rick.”
“All right. All right. You wanna get all hung up on some chick, it’s your problem.” I followed him back into his office where he’d set up the feed for the sensors so that we could watch as the plane took off and flew over the runway.
As expected, the flight went perfectly. All we had to do now was put the sensor into production. I made a mental note to offer Rick a bonus for what he’d done for the company. Judging by the way the Navy men were watching, it was clear that they would have a full racket of orders set up by the end of the week.
When the test was over, I excused myself so I could walk back to the office. My phone started vibrating halfway there. It was Mona. “Hello?” I tried not to sound panicked.
“Hey, Archer.”
“What’s going on? Is everything okay?”
“It’s Abel.”
“No…”
“He slept most of the day, and now he’s running a fever.”
“How high is it?”
“102.”
“Dammit, Mona. I’m gonna have to head down there, aren’t I?”
“I think it would be best if you came,” she said.
“I’m on my way.” I hung up and called my driver. The old man had been with me for years. He never once showed up for work sober. The second he pulled up to the house, I jumped out and ran inside.
“Mona,” I called from the bottom of the stairs.
“I’m here.” She walked out of the nursery.
“Where is he? Is he all right?” I took the steps two by two until I was standing outside the nursery, where Abel laid in his crib.
“We’re gonna have to take him down to the hospital.”
I pulled out my phone. “I’m calling a chopper.”
She walked back into the room to check on him. I followed. He was lying on his back, squinting his eyes and reaching up into the air. His skin was unnaturally red, like he’d been boiled alive.
“Hello,” a thin husky voice said on the line. I walked out to talk.
“Fred, I need you here now.”
“What’s going on?”
“My kid is sick. We’re gonna airlift him to General. How soon can you get here?”
“I can be there in less than ten minutes if I leave now. Is the boy okay?”
“I don’t know yet. Just get here as soon as you can.” I hung up. “Mona.” I motioned for her to come out and talk to me. “Get him bundled up and ready to fly. I’ll handle Andrew.”
“Okay.” She started packing a diaper bag.
“What’s going to happen?” I asked. “Can they get the fever down?”
“I’m more than certain they can. They can use medicine to bring it down. He’ll be in the perfect place for keeping an eye on it,” she said.
I’d spent every second since the boys were born doing everything I could to ensure that they were safe. I smoothed out all of the issues, made sure that there were no loose ends, and double checked everything to make sure that uncertainties like this didn’t crop up. Now, after everything I’d done, I was staring at my son, the sweetest little man I’d ever met in my entire life, and I couldn’t be sure whether or not he’d last the night.
“All right.” Mona stuffed the bag with enough diapers to last a year. “If you’re just going to stand there worried, you can at least get out of my way.”
“I’m sorry it’s just—ugh,” I raged. My phone was vibrating, so I walked out to answer it. “Hello?”
“Hey.” It was the helicopter pilot. “I’m almost there. Head up to the pad and meet me.”
“We’ll be right there.”
I ducked my head back into the nursery. “Let’s go.”
Mona grabbed Abel and wrapped him up in a layer of blankets so she could carry him while I lifted Andrew into his seat. The helicopter was fast. Almost as soon as we took off, we started landing at the hospital.
I watched helplessly as a team of nurses ran out onto the helipad and took my son into the hospital. When I tried to get out and follow them, Mona pressed a hand against my shoulder to stop me. “Let them work. It won’t do any good to stand around moping and getting in their way.”
“You want me to wait?” I turned on her. “My son is in there. He could be dying, and your advice is to wait and see what happens?”
“That’s all you can do.”
“It’s not enough.” I jumped out to follow them inside, through the maze of corridors into his room, where a young Asian woman wearing a stethoscope was looking him over.
“What’s happening?”
She smiled up at me. “Relax.”
“Woman…”
“Archer.” Mona came up behind me. “Just let her do her job.”
What if she didn’t know what she was doing, or she missed something that ended up killing my son after we brought him home? I couldn’t leave my son’s life in that woman’s hands without making sure that I did everything I could to avoid a disaster.
She reached out to grab Abel.
“Whoa, whoa. What are you doing?”
“I need to take his temperature.”
“Fine.” I watched as she flipped him over, supporting his chest with one hand while she took his temperature with the other. “What does it say?” I asked the second she took the thermometer out. She ignored me and took out a pen to write something down on the clipboard she was holding. I nearly knocked it out of her hand. “How high is it?”
“Archer…”
“Mona.” I turned to face her. “Your services are no longer needed for the moment. Please, go wait outside with Andrew.”
“Gladly.” She walked out.
“How high is it?” I pressed the woman.
“104.”
“Oh, my God.” My head fell into my hands.
“We just need to take some time to treat him and make sure that his fever goes down is all. It’s not the end of the world. This happens to everybody.”
“It what?”
“Children get fevers all the time, and you’re not the first parent I’ve seen freaking out over it. We get three or four a week, though I’ve never seen anyone fly their child in with a helicopter.”
“You’re telling me that this happens to everyone?” I felt like such an idiot.
“Usually when infants get their first fever, yes, and it’s perfectly okay to be worried. This can be dangerous, but we’re going to stay by his side and make sure he gets through to the best of our ability. You’re welcome to sit with him.”
“Something could happen to him?”
“It doesn’t happen very often, but yes. If the infection is bad enough, his temperature might keep rising to dangerous levels.”
“And if that happens?”
“We look for other options, but it’s not an Armageddon scenario by any means.”
“Well, which do you think it is?”
“I’ll have to go get him some medication and find out.” She walked out of the room.
Abel was lying on his back, wrapped in his baby blue blanket, his eyes closed. I reached out to stroke his cheek, and he turned over to get a look at me. It was the first time that he’d done that without shrieking in what seemed like years. I couldn’t let anything happen to that boy.
They said it wasn’t the end of the world, but they couldn’t give me any guarantees, either. Didn’t they know how horrible it was for me to sit there wondering what was going to happen? I didn’t care how many parents that woman saw. She didn’t know me. She didn’t understand what it was like to have to wake up in the middle of the night just to make sure that my son was still breathing. How could they tell me to relax?
The nurse came back shortly with a bottle of red liquid. “Is that ibuprofen?” I asked.
“Yes. Good eye.” She started pouring some out into a cup. She reached out and lifted the cup to his lips. “Here you go.”
He squirmed away. “Here.” I held his head still so he’d take it. Then, when she was finished, she threw the cup away and started to walk out. “Where are you going? Take his temperature.”
“We’re going to have to wait.” I stared her down. “Fine.” She marched up and flipped him over to take his temperature again. “It’s the same.” She reached into her pocket, took a quick look around, and pulled out a blue, pez-shaped pill. “Take this.
“What is it?”
“Something to calm you down”
“No.” I pushed it away.
“Fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. I can’t have you freaking out every time I walk in here. I’ve got two gunshots on my hands and more coming. I promise you things will go more smoothly if you’re not questioning everything I do.”
“Fine.” I threw up my hands. “I’ll stay quiet and wait to see if my son is going to live while you stitch up crack dealers.”
“Thank you.” She walked out.
“I was being sarcastic,” I yelled after her.
“As long as you do it,” she called back.
Something told me that if I didn’t do what she said, she’d have me escorted off the property. The woman was vicious. She didn’t care how hard this was for me. She was a medical professional, as cold and detached as could be. The boy could’ve choked right in front of her, and she wouldn’t have flinched.
Mona and Andrew were out in the waiting room, which meant that Abel and I were in this alone. I was the only person who gave a damn enough to make sure that nothing happened. Wait and see. I shook my head. Mona said he could die.
“I wish your mother was here. She’d know just what to say to calm us both down. You’d probably be laughing right now.” He looked away from me and closed his eyes. I wasn’t sure what to think of that. Was he supposed to be getting tired? Was that a result of his fever? Would falling asleep hurt him? I couldn’t wake him up, though. He seemed peaceful, like he’d just gotten the first bit of peace he’d had all day.
I wish I felt the same way. All I could do was sit and stare at him, watching his chest rise and fall, listening for those little sounds of distress that only a parent could recognize. His breath started to slow, and I started to panic. I jumped up to run out into the hall to find somebody then stopped halfway there. If I ran out there screaming for help, they’d probably have me dragged out of there. It wasn’t fair. If I wanted to make sure my son was all right, I had to stay calm. That didn’t make any sense.
Abel’s doctor passed by the door. “Something’s wrong,” I told her before she could walk away.
“What is it?” she asked, her hands on her hips.
“He’s breathing slower.”
“He’s probably sleeping.”
“Can you at least take his temperature?”
“Fine, but I’m not coming back in there for a half hour after this. I don’t care if his head explodes.”
“Just do it.” I stepped aside to let her in.
She flipped Abel over, and he erupted with a high-pitched wail. “What are you doing? He’s a baby. Be gentle.”
“Listen.” She pulled out her thermometer and stuck it in without a second’s hesitation. “I’ve got two people ready to bleed out on me and a heart patient that needs constant care.”
“And an infant that could be dying.” I stepped closer.
She pulled out the thermometer. “He’s not dying.”
“You don’t know that.” I took another step closer.
“Look.” She reached out to show me the thermometer. His temperature was ninety-eight degrees. “He’s not dying. In fact, he’s ready to go home. So, get to the chopper and get out of my hair.” She rushed out.
“What if the fever comes back?” I yelled.
“Then bring him back. Just please wait until my shift is over.”
I took a look down at Abel. He’d stopped screaming, and now his eyes were starting to droop. I knew that I should probably feel a little ashamed of myself for the way I treated her, but this was my boy. I wasn’t going to let things go to chance.
He was fine. I knew he was, and I knew that I was overreacting, but that didn’t make it any easier to stop. I called Mona.
“How is he?” she answered.
“His temperature’s down. The doctor says that we’re done here, but I don’t want you to let him leave your sight for a second. I can’t have this happening again. I can’t take it.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said a thing to you about babies dying from fevers. It turned into a huge disaster.”
“Now I’m all shaken up, and the way you guys kept telling me to calm down—it just made things worse.”
“It’s okay now, Archer. I’ll be with him all day while you’re at work. I’m not going to let anything happen to him.”
“Don’t. I’m calling a car.”
The whole way home I kept checking on Abel, lifting the blanket away from his carrier, pressing my hands to his cheeks. Once Andrew fell asleep, Mona asked, “Are you okay?”
“No, I’m not okay. He could’ve been hurt. What if this happens, and there’s nothing we can do?”
“Life is fragile and messy, and there’s nothing you can do to prepare for it. That’s not because you’re inadequate or because you can’t handle things. Things just happen.”
“I know that.”
“But you don’t like it. You can’t lie to me. It scares the shit out of you, and if you don’t come to terms with it, you’ll never be happy.”
“These are my children. I can’t sit around wondering whether or not they’re going to survive.”
“Every parent goes through this. It’s about learning to look at things realistically, even when you’re panicking. It’s not easy, but I know you. You can do this.”
I imagined Zoe with her hair tied back in a ponytail, sweating and red in the face with eyes drooping as she ran around, trying to get one twin to sleep and then the other. Then I saw her in the ER, watching me freak out on that lady.
Food service wasn’t easy, especially when you had to make everything from scratch. She worked harder than I did, and it was obviously burning her out. She wasn’t going to stick around and put up with this. She was too busy trying to build her life up. Even if she wanted to, she didn’t have time to take care of two shrieking twins all night or spend her time in the ER. Once she found out what my world was like, she was going to run. I already knew that. I knew how dangerous our relationship was, and I chose to pursue it anyway. I was being selfish.
I wanted to say that she was worth the risk, and part of me felt like she was, but I could see the way things were going. If this continued, we’d have to part ways. It might not happen right away. She might even accept the twins, but eventually, things would go wrong, and she’d walk away. The longer I let this draw out, the more attached we’d get to each other and the harder it would be when she finally left.
Mona must’ve noticed that I was lost in thought because she spoke up. “What’s wrong?”
I stared out the window. “Nothing.” My voice was quieter than I thought it would be.
“This isn’t about Abel and Andrew, is it?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Maybe not.” She moved the blanket covering Abel’s car seat to check on him. He seemed peaceful.
“You’re right, Mona. They need a woman’s touch.”
“They do.” She patted me on the leg and looked out the window.