Alex kept taking her eyes off the road, glancing in my direction.

Giving her a weak smile, I turned my attention out my passenger side window, afraid to show her too much of what was actually going on inside my stuffy head.

I never did tell her about my visitor at the diner. She was already too worried about me. And, lucky for me, he was gone by the time she came back from using the toilet.

Alex drove and I retreated into my thoughts as I pinched my bottom lip.

My brain scrambled to find a logical excuse as to why I agreed to keep my promise to Mom. But Alex was cheering me on, encouraging me to finally make my peace. And as much as I didn’t want to listen, she did a damn good job selling her reasons as to why I should.

Plus, she offered to drive me herself—which made the decision that much easier.

I tried to avoid the south side of the city at all costs. It was where I was from, close to family, and, until today, I certainly would have never found myself anywhere near the neighborhood I’d grown up in.

“God, it’s weird to be going home,” I expressed out loud, wishing it felt more like a reunion than something I was forced into doing.

Alex reached her hand over and closed her fingers around mine. She squeezed my bones but it did nothing to settle the nerves quivering my knees. “This isn’t about them. This is for you,” she reminded me.

I nodded, knowing exactly what it was she was saying. And maybe she was right. If I wasn’t going to seek professional help to deal with my triggers, then the least I could do was see if my parents were older and wiser to admit the wrong they committed all those years ago.

Turning my attention back out the window, I kept thinking how it had been years since we’d seen each other. I was a grown woman now. And though I was confident with the decisions I’d made for myself, my only hope was that my parents wouldn’t resent me for leaving them behind.

As we approached my old neighborhood, it was impossible to suppress the old emotions bubbling up inside me.

I was mixed between wanting to sit up, proud of where I came from, and sinking down low into my seat, afraid that I might walk away from this feeling worse than I did now.

Looking over at Alex, I said, “You would have thought I would have come back at least once all these years …”

She took her eyes off the road and glanced at me. “Not all things are easy to move on from.”

Staring straight ahead, I felt numb. “Too many memories that I wanted to forget.”

“But, girl, I believe this is the right decision.” Her foot pressed on the brake pedal.

Slowing to a complete stop, I could see me as a child riding up and down the sidewalks, racing my friends on our bikes.

“What I wouldn’t do to be in your shoes.” Alex’s voice was light but full of absolute truth.

“Really?” I snapped my head over to see if she was for real.

Alex kept the car stopped, not seeming to be in any kind of hurry. And I loved her for that. Even if it wasn’t by design. Anything to delay the inevitable, I was for it.

Nodding, she smiled. “I miss them, Kendra.”

My vision blurred as her face puffed up with extreme sadness. And as if our two energies exploded, we wrapped our arms around each other, hugging the other as if our lives depended on the love we shared.

“Your parents watch over you every day. I know they do,” I said into her ear.

She nodded, and after a minute, Alex pulled back and dabbed her eyes dry.

As soon as we crossed the intersection, I pointed to my parent’s house. “That’s it right there.”

Alex was the one who needed closure. The one who could find peace with what happened to her own parents. She didn’t hide from how she felt, and I knew better than anybody else how badly she wished she could have the chance I was about to have.

“This is where you grew up?” Alex’s eyes widened as she peered out the front windshield.

The moment the wheels stopped and Alex parked, my eyes followed the cracked concrete pathway all the way to the front door. “Yeah.”

“I can stay and wait for you.”

Unable to peel my eyes away from the tiny house I’d grown up in, I began to guess what waited for me on the other side of those walls.

“Kendra, baby, it’s not a problem.”

“No.” I sighed. “You go on ahead. I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

Turning, I nodded and smiled. “Yeah. I’m sure.”

“Call me if you need me.”

Unbuckling myself, I knew that even if things went well with my parents I still had to get on with fulfilling my duties requested by Madam. Alex knew nothing about that, and I wasn’t about to worry her with those details.

“Thanks.” I smiled and we hugged before I opened the car door, taking one step closer to reacquainting myself with the two people who ultimately failed me beyond forgiveness.

Alex leaned over the center. “Love you.”

Latching onto my tote with a white-knuckled grip, I bent down and said, “Love you more.”

Alex smiled, letting me have this one without telling me that it was impossible to love her more than she loved me. We always wanted to outdo each other with expressing how much we loved the other. Today, it was me with the biggest heart.

Closing the door, I watched Alex spin the car around and drive away in the same direction we’d come. Sucking back a deep breath, I let my gaze travel over the desert dry yards. Even that hadn’t changed since I was a kid. And though the buildings were now older and more dilapidated than they once were, the neighborhood was essentially the same.

Turning back to the house, I lifted my chin and rolled my shoulders back.

It was amazing that I’d managed to break free from the continual cycle of poverty and limited opportunity that this neighborhood was notorious for. I could even smell the general loss of hope that reeked of this area.

On my next step, Kelly Black hit my thoughts.

I smiled, thinking how the man managed to open my eyes to what could be possible.

And the world suddenly looked brighter.

Then I stepped again and I could still hear the neighborhood kids screaming and singing from so long ago as I made my way to the front door.

My resolve grew the closer I got, and once I was within reach I didn’t hesitate to jab my finger on the doorbell, alerting my parents to my arrival. With my nerves threatening to get the best of me, Mom answered the door before I could hightail it away from my past.

We both stood there and stared for a minute without saying a word. Then she teared up, extending her arms out to the sides, wrapping me up in the type of all-consuming hug only a mother could give.

Even though I hugged her back, I wasn’t sure I was as ready to embrace her the same way as she was me. I still hadn’t forgiven her for what she didn’t do so long ago. And I wasn’t sure I ever could.

Pulling back, there was immense joy inside those wet eyes of hers. “Come inside, baby. Let me make you some tea.”

Following her inside, I looked around as if the place was foreign to me. Nothing had changed. It was exactly the same as when I left. From the arrangement of the furniture to the blankets that draped over the back of the couch. Even the smell—sourdough and sugar—was the exact same as I remembered. And though all these things should have made me feel comfortable, all I wanted to do was leave.

Mom came out of the kitchen fast enough to make me think that she already had the tea made prior to my arrival. She set the mugs on the coffee table out in front and sat on the far edge of the couch, pouring each of the mugs full.

I followed her lead, taking up residence on the opposite end, quick to reach for my tea. I needed something to do, something to hold on to, to settle my anxiety. I wasn’t good at small talk, didn’t know how to ease into the conversation I really wanted to have with her. So I just sat there staring into her aged eyes, wondering where the years had gone.

“You look beautiful, Kendra.” Mom smiled from behind the rim of her mug.

“I’m a woman now, Mom.”

“Not my little girl anymore.”

Knowing I might regret it, it was the first thought that came to mind so I said it. “I’ll always be your little girl.”

She laughed, sipping her tea. Her movements were fluid and, though she never said it, I knew she was happy to finally be sitting next to me again. “I’ve been thinking about you lots.”

My brows raised as I cast my gaze into my tea.

“Wondering if my little girl was even still alive.”

I swallowed the mint tea. “Not dead yet.”

She laughed but it wasn’t meant to be funny. “I’m so glad you called.”

Lowering my mug to my lap, I kept my eye on Mom. She was older, but I could see she still had her wit about her. Growing up, Mom always was the one to keep us grounded. Never letting our egos get to big or our accomplishments go without recognition. “How is Dad doing?”

Her face tightened. “He’s in the back.”

Nodding, I felt my skin flush.

Out of the corner of her eye she smiled. “He asks about you all the time.”

The muscles in my stomach hardened. “Did you tell him I called?”

She nodded as uncertainty flashed over her eyes.

Straightening my spine, I asked, “What is it, Ma?”

Her eyes rounded and began to water again. Then she covered her mouth, ducked her head, and started crying. “It’s just that I didn’t think you would see him before it was too late.”

Moving over to her, I rubbed her bony shoulders with my hand. She felt so fragile, more delicate than what I remembered. Growing up, she was the first to give my bottom a good whoopin’ when I did something I shouldn’t have done.

Lifting her head, she fixed her gaze with mine. “It’s so exhausting. This disease he has, it’s awful. He can’t do much by himself, barely able to talk. It’s all on me …”

“I read up on it.” I pulled my hand away, blinking the dry out of my eye.

Turning her head, she said, “He would love to see you.”

Scooting away, I mumbled, “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Ma.”

My fist clenched unknowingly on top of my thigh as old feelings of hate quickly drowned me. I was still so angry at Dad for allowing my uncle into my bedroom as a child. He knew what was happening, yet he did nothing. This was all his fault. Not mine. Everything that happened—me getting raped, me running away from home, me choosing not to talk with my parents for all these years—it was all his fault.

“Marvin said you might call—” the joy was back in Mom’s eyes “—if I kept praying.”

My body temperature spiked. I knew Uncle Marvin was behind this. He always was. I had my suspicions as to why, but I bit my tongue hoping Mom would reveal the motive sooner or later.

“Which I did.” Mom nodded. “Everyday. Mmm hmmm.” She smiled, glancing to the ceiling as if speaking to the Lord himself. “You know he’s back in the area?” Mom lowered her hand and let her gaze fall back to me.

She looked happy about my uncle being back. And it made me sick. Feeling used, all I could say was, “I saw him the other day.”

“You did?!” Mom slapped her hand down on her knee. “I didn’t know that.”

“He gave me Grandma’s will, Ma.” My tone was reserved.

Her spine slumped as her eyes blinked.

My brow knitted. “Why would Uncle Marvin reach out to me?”

“I didn’t know he did,” Mom muttered. Then she perked up. “Though he said that if we could find you that you might be able to help.”

I cringed away from her. I didn’t need to ask what she needed help with. I already knew. But I asked anyway, just so I could call her out on her own flaws. “Help with what?”

“The costs of Dad’s care,” she said, matter of fact. “After all, it was his parents who gave you all that money.”

I stared at my mom in utter disbelief. I regretted coming at all. This wasn’t about reuniting, this was about stealing my money in order to save Dad from having to experience a miserable death due to ALS complications.

Standing, I shoved my fingers through my hair feeling like I was about to explode. “Do you even know what happened to me, Ma?”

Frowning, she fumbled over her words.

“Your brother raped me.” A million different emotions hit my heart. In that moment, I felt free, trapped, hurt, sad, angry, and so much more.

Feeling my chest heave up and down, I watched the lines on Mom’s face deepen. She shook her head and said, “No. That’s not true.”

“Dad knew about it,” I growled.

Mom stood and squared her shoulders. “Lies!”

My eyes flooded with tears. Spilling over my cheeks, I started crying. “And neither of you did anything!”

Mom’s mouth snapped shut. But her challenging eyes never left me. “Then that explains it.”

“Explains what?” I yelled.

“Why you’re in your current profession.” She frowned, a look of disgust weighing her cheeks down.

I vacantly stared at her.

“I know what you do, Kendra.”

“Then why did you ask me the other day?”

She gave the same stern look of disappointment she used to give me as a child. “Escorting? The skin trade? I didn’t raise my daughter to be a whore.”

Her words were like a sledgehammer hitting my chest. All the air was knocked out of me. In a split second, she had brought me to my knees. I couldn’t breathe. Didn’t know how to react. If I should fight or just let it go, knowing I would never win with her. She knew about my life secrets even before she knew where I was.

Taking a step back, I started shaking my head.

“I promised not to judge.” Mom’s lips pinched. “The good Lord will be the one to do that.”

Then it hit me.

My uncle told her.

Told her everything he knew about me. I’d let my guard down and he got past my gate. And, because of it, this was what I got. “If Dad wasn’t sick, would you have even wanted to see me?”

“You left the family.” Mom stomped her foot. “That was your choice.”

“I left because I wasn’t safe.” I gritted my teeth and looked around. “I’ve never felt safe in this house.”

Mom’s face softened. “Your father needs you.” She stepped closer to me. “We both need you. Family comes first.” Her lips tugged to her ears as she softened her tone. “Isn’t that right, baby? You understand. I know you do.”

Turning away, I dropped my head into my hands.

“Look, Kendra,” Mom rested her hand on my arm. “I don’t care where your money is coming from.”

Flipping my hair over my shoulder, I bared my teeth. “You just want it?”

“We need it.” She smoothed her clamped fingers down my arm. “We need you to come through for us. You’re all we have.”

Brushing her hand off my arm, I turned to the couch, gathered my things, and marched to the door.

“Where are you going, Kendra?”

“A girl’s gotta work,” I said, grabbing my pussy. Glancing over my shoulder, I narrowed my gaze and hissed, “After all, that’s how I pay the bills, right?”