“Give me everything?” She frowns then casts her eyes down. “I’m not what you think I am, Thorne. I’m not normal. I’m damaged. Maybe I’m even a bit insane like my mother. When I was nine, I started having fantasies of killing my grandfather.”

“That doesn’t make you insane. Fuck, Chelsea, I wanted to kill him with my bare hands this afternoon.”

She leans forward until her forehead is resting against my stomach, and I hold her tight. “There was one time he came into my bedroom. I was doing my homework and holding a pencil, and I just wanted to drive it through his eye. I could actually see myself lunging forward and stabbing it so hard that I damaged his brain. I could imagine the jelly of his eye rupturing, splattering on my face and clothes. It was so real.” Her voice is low, but I can feel the vibration of her words and the intensity of her memories.

“The difference between you and me is that I would have driven that pencil into his damn head.” My voice is cold and hard.

“I had so many fantasies, Thorne. I used to dream of such violent things. They were extreme. I was afraid of myself.”

Chelsea begins to tell me the stories about the things she wanted to do to her grandfather given the chance. I listen intently and as she pours her heart out I become enraged. It is shocking to imagine people who are the caregivers of helpless children subjecting them to such heinous abuse.

Her wanting revenge is more than justified. Fuck, I want revenge on her behalf.

“Before I left,” she continues, wiping her nose with the back of her hand. “I even considered burning down the house with both of my grandparents inside. I almost did it, too. I got so far as to wait outside with a canister of gasoline, but then I froze. It’s like there’s a force field around that house that makes me too terrified to do anything. All I could do was run away.”

She clenches her jaw. “Oh, how many times I wished that I could do something, anything to stop him hurting me. I used to get so angry at myself because I knew there was something I could do, but I chose not to do it. I think I was always afraid I would be taken away, and never see my mother again.” She utters a harsh bark of laughter. “And all that time she hated my guts. What a mess my life has been.”

“Hey, it’s not up to the child to do something. The adult should know better than to be so disgusting and abusive. Your grandmother should have done something. Nothing that happened was ever your fault.”

She pulls away from me and looks into my eyes. “I’m afraid that he could be doing it to other children. That fear has never gone away. Do you think he could be? I don’t know. Nowadays you hear about pedophiles meeting other pedophiles on the net and stuff. It’s a compulsive sickness, after all.”

“You won’t ever have to worry about your grandfather, Chelsea. He’s not going to get the opportunity to hurt you or anyone else ever again.” I have enough money and influence to make a promise like that and mean it.

She hangs her head. “You don’t have to protect me, Thorne. You owe me nothing. Our agreement will end soon. After that I won’t be around to disturb you, or bring drama into your life,” she sniffles.

“Chelsea.” I put my forefinger under her chin and tip her face up until we are looking deeply into each other’s eyes. “You’re not disturbing me. Our agreement doesn’t mean shit to me. It never really did. I was pretending even to myself that I was furious about the money. I was just hurt because you didn’t trust me enough to ask me for it. Now, I just want you safe. I can’t let anything else happen to you because … well … I fucking love you.” It is my turn to be vulnerable and exposed. My secret about Chelsea has been revealed, and I don’t know how she will react to the information.

She freezes. Then blinks. “You what?”

“You heard me. I love you, Chelsea Appleby.”

“You love me?” Chelsea whispers, disbelief in her voice.

I nod. “The truth is I think I was half in love with you even before you left London two years ago. It’s something that I’ve always known deep inside, but have never been able to acknowledge or express. You’ve met my parents, so you know I’ve been brought up to be cold and aloof, but the more time I’ve spent with you the more you turned me inside out.”

“What about the debt though?”

“There isn’t any debt to pay. Nothing. As you said yourself, what is three hundred thousand to me? I’ve earned more from the stock market in the last five minutes. I was not interested in the money. All I ever wanted was you. I can’t be too sorry for blackmailing you into coming to live with me because it was the best fucking thing I did in my life.”

She smiles weakly. “I thought I was just a sex object to you.”

“Do you really think I would have sex with a woman without taking any precautions if she meant nothing to me? I was always secretly hoping you’d get pregnant.”

“I am on the pill,” she says softly. “But I don’t have to be.”

I smile slowly “Good. Because I would love to see you round with my child.”

She swallows hard. “Thorne … I … love you too,” she stammers suddenly, looking right into my eyes.

It is like being on a roller coaster. Today I have felt the gamut of human emotions. From hatred to rage to love to pure elation. I want to whoop with joy. “When did you know?” I ask with a wide grin.

“I was crazy about you from the day you interviewed me. I couldn’t even focus I was so freaking attracted to you.”

I grin. “Really?”

“Couldn’t you tell? I thought you were going to fire me. I kept looking at your mouth.”

I reach down and kiss her. “What, this mouth?”

“Mmmm … yeah, that mouth.”

“Tell me more,” I encourage.

“You were just such a powerhouse. So confident. So successful. So handsome. I mean, most of the women in the office were masturbating to fantasies of you.”

“Bullshit.”

“No, I’m serious.”

“Did you?”

She blushes. “I might have. Once or twice.”

I thought I wouldn’t get a hard on after what we’ve been through today, but just like that. I’m hard as a rock.