My phone vibrates on my black nightstand. Naked in bed, blanket up to my waist, I stretch for it. “Hey you.”

She’s got her late-night voice on, just like me. “Sorry, Lexi came home and we had to talk. She disappeared into her room before realizing that Sally was still with me. Now you’re stuck with me, aren’t you, Sals?”

I chuckle, “Lexi’s her favorite.”

“You joke, but trust me, she is.”

“Nah, she likes you just as much.”

“Then why is she pawing the door?”

“Is she?”

With a smile in her tone, Sam confesses, “No.”

Stretching out my toes I grin, “You’re so dumb.”

“You’re dumber.”

“What are you guys doing?”

“Me and Sally?”

“Yeah.”

“Staring at shadows on the ceiling.”

“See anything in particular?” I wait for an answer and when it doesn’t come, I frown, “Sam?”

“Huh?”

“See anything?”

“Sorry. I got lost in my thoughts a second.”

“What were you thinking about?”

“Aren’t girls supposed to ask that?”

“When you’re dating, yeah.”

“True.”

“You’re not going to tell me.”

“There’s a boogeyman top right.”

“Really? I’ve got a warped ice cream cone.”

“Trade you.”

“Done. Wait, I’ll make the boogeyman vanish. Watch this.” I make a bunch of noises like I’m a magician, a healer, or someone who can actually change shadows on a ceiling in another neighborhood, from sheer mind-power and willingness.

“Fail.”

“I’m not done,” I murmur, waving my hands in the air. “He’s very persistent. There. Got him.”

We sit in silence for a bit until I hear Samantha’s breathing change. Stifling a laugh, I listen to her sleeping. I can picture her parted lips, long, light brown eyelashes closed as she cuddles with Sally. I bet the lights are still on in her room — she always does that.

I’ve seen Sam dreaming more times that I could count. When we were little she was just my buddy. But that changed, and I don’t know exactly when. I love watching her sleep. She looks angelic, but I can’t let it last.

“SAM!”

She snorts, “Huh? What?!”

“You passed out. Not cool.”

“Who are you? How did this phone get in my hand?”

“If I didn’t get rid of the boogeyman, just say so. You don’t have to insult me by pretending I bored you unconscious.”

Her tone shifts to curious. “Okay, weird.”

My eyebrows shoot up. “It’s gone?”

“The shadow is different.”

“See? I’m magic.”

“Go to sleep, dork.”

I lose the humor and ask, “What were you thinking about earlier? Something’s bugging you.”

She sighs, “I don’t want to dampen your big day, Logan.”

Adjusting my pillow, I rest on my hand, staring at the dark ice cream cone in the corner. “You upset you didn’t get the part? There’s still a chance.”

“There’s a reason I screwed up my audition.”

“What?”

“Caden got sent to Chicago. We took him to the airport this morning.”

“What?” Bolting upright, I drag a hand through my messy hair. “When did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me? I wish you would’ve told me so I could have helped pack and say goodbye, too.”

With regret in her voice, she says, “It was just family, Logan. He doesn’t have a big house, and everyone…well, it was just a Cocker thing. Sorry.”

Tightness digs into my chest.

Did she even think to call?

Was I on her mind at all?

“Sure, I get it. No big deal.”

She sounds so sleepy as she says, “It was pretty much just us cousins.”

“It’s cool. This isn’t about me.”

“Sweet dreams, Logan.”

“Night,” I frown, staying on the line.

She’s snoring into the receiver within seconds.

Samantha, you just don’t get it, do you? I wanted to be there to say goodbye to him. But more than that, I’d have liked to have been there for you. So that’s the reason for the sadness I saw in your beautiful eyes the day you blew that audition. It wasn’t the shot you lost, it was the brother.

I would have skipped it.

Given up the audition.

If you’d have just told me.

But you didn’t.

You put me first.

And I’m going to lie here listening to you sleep until I fall asleep, too.

Wish I had been there with you.

For you.