I watch as she wraps the towel tight around her and give Grant a glance as we walk to my truck. There are so many things I want to ask her, and so many things I want to tell him. But I can't with either of them when they're both right here.
“Back to my place for drinks?” I ask, nodding to Grant. “Stay in the spare room I'll get ya home in the morning.” He lives on the other end of town and right now I just want to get home.
Grant hops in the backseat and when Affton climbs in I make sure she's in the middle, right next to me. The ride back is quiet and I think Grant's passed out back there until I glance and see him staring out the window. We park at my place and head inside, each of us sighing in relief.
“I'm too old for late night partying anymore,” I say, laughing and grabbing us each a beer. I toss one to Grant and offer Affton one.
“You're a pussy, dude. We used to stay out way later than this.” He relaxes back on the chair in the living room and takes a long swig of his beer.
Affton follows me to the couch and when I sit, she sits and props her legs on my lap, grinning at both of us. “So, Grant.” She takes a drink of her beer. “I hear you've fucked Tommy.”
Grant's snort almost sends beer out his nose. “Damn, Barns, you didn't waste any time, did you?” He laughs then points his beer at Affton. “That word doesn't spread, you hear that? And we never fucked. We just used to fuck the same girls. At the same time. That's all.” He shrugs. “It's not gay, Affton.”
She's laughing so hard she's having a hard time catching her breath. “I'd watch.” She wiggles when I start to tickle her calves. “I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's the alcohol. But honestly.” She looks from him to me with a smile beaming on her face. “I'm not really surprised. But I would love to know how this came about.”
“Well, as you know your boy here happens to be the biggest horn dog this side of the Mississippi,” Grant says and I shake my head.
“Don’t listen to him,” I cut him off and smile at her, praying this doesn’t scare her away but she's the one who brought it up. “Honestly, I think we were drunk the first time it happened. It was so long ago I barely remember it, but there was only one girl at this party we were at that we both wanted, so we approached her and were pretty fuckin' blunt about it.” I laugh.
“I told her I'd stick it in her ass if she let Barns stick it in her pussy.” Grant nods like this is any normal everyday conversation and Affton giggles harder.
“You DP?” she asks in excitement. “God, this just gets better. So then...your balls have probably touched. Right?” She looks between us. “Right?”
“God,” I groan. “It's just best not to think about what parts of us have touched and what parts haven't, Bean.”
Grant starts to laugh which spurs Affton's giggles even more.
“Yes, Affton. Our balls have touched. But it was all for the greater good because once word got out that this small ass town had two hot dudes willing to do that?” He makes this explosion noise and does the hand gesture and everything. “Shit. Went. Down.”
“Oh gross.” She's still laughing but she sits up and scoots away from me. “I can only imagine how many girls in this town have had both of you in them...at once.” Her eye contact is lost to the floor now and she's fiddling with the strap to her bathing suit. I’m not sure if she's turned off or turned on, but the pink flush to her tone makes me believe it's the latter.
“Not everyone could handle both of us. Sometimes we would just be there...” I catch her gaze finally. “Watching.” Her eyes flit to Grant's and I look over at him.
He's wearing a stone faced expression and gripping his beer tight. “All we would do is watch,” he murmurs, bringing his drink to his lips. “You ever done that, Affton? Let someone watch you orgasm at the hands of someone else?”
Her eyes dart to mine and she studies my relaxed expression, probably thinking Grant's about to get his ass stomped, but I smirk. I'm not pissed. I never thought something like this would ever be brought up in casual conversation, but it doesn't piss me off.
“N-no.” She clears her throat and drops her head, adjusting that damn strap again.
“You should try it sometime,” Grant suggests. “It's not as scary as it sounds.”
My eyes flick to Grant’s and he's nodding slightly, his eyes locked on Affton.
“Grant,” I warn, knowing this whole situation isn't something she's ever probably thought of. And definitely not with the two of us.
“I'm just sayin’.” He shrugs. “It's probably better to try it with someone you trust.”
Grant and I haven't done this in a while. Hell, he knows how I feel about Affton. We've never picked girls we had any emotional connections too, so this probably should bother me, but it doesn't. Not at all.
“Trust is key.” I bring my fingertips to her legs, drawing circles on her skin. Her eyes are locked on me and I hear Grant shift across the room. I'll try it, but the minute she shows signs of being uncomfortable, we're done. “You trust me, Bean?” I whisper, tucking her hair behind her ear and watching her slowly nod. “Good,” I murmur then lightly lean in and push my lips to hers, inhaling her sweet scent. I back away, her cheeks flushed and eyes filled with lust. “And you trust him?” I nod across the room where Grant's watching us intently.
She starts to laugh and shoots Grant a doubtful smile. “Hell no. But I trust that you do. No offense.” She winks at him.
“None taken, sweets,” he says, raising his beer before bringing it to his lips.
“So?” I whisper, pushing her to lean back on the couch. “It's like this,” I manage, though I'm a mixture of terrified and turned on. I've never had this type of reaction when we’ve done this before. I push my lips to her skin and she melts into my touch. “Just relax,” I whisper, painfully hard just from the thought that this could actually happen. Her nipples pebble under her swim top and her breathing becomes faster. My hands cup her tits and my thumb flicks over her nipple, making her gasp. “This okay?”
“Yes,” she breathes and nods, keeping her eyes on me. I can feel the slight tremble in her body, but I'm not sure if it’s lust or nerves, but she's not stopping me.
“Just you and me, Beany. I promise. Grant’s pervert hands won’t touch you.”
Grant knows not to touch her and I may kick his ass if he does. Just the fact that she's okay with this tonight is leaps and bounds from where we were a couple days ago. But no one touches my girl before I get to.
“I can hear you, you know. I’m right fucking here.” Grant grumbles and adjusts himself in his chair.
I chuckle and find Affton's gaze again. ”Hey,” I whisper, grinning and letting my fingers dance along the top of her swimsuit bottoms. She shivers slightly and I smirk. “Breathe, Affton.” I slide my hand between her legs, locking my eyes on hers, and feel how wet she already is. I drop to my knees on the floor and watch her eyes start to flutter closed as I slowly push my fingers inside her. “Fuck, Beany,” I huff. “I've always loved this pussy.”
She exhales and her eyes close while her pussy clenches around my fingers. When Grant's shifting makes a noise, her eyes open and land on him, making me worry she's going to end this. She lets out a quiet moan and her eyes focus on me again. Good. Stay focused on me. I push her bottoms down, letting them fall to the floor and moan when I finally get a glimpse of her pussy. I trail my finger down her before dipping it inside.
“You like this, Beany. God, you're already so wet,” I say, my tone thick and full of emotions.
“Sounds like it,” Grant mumbles from behind me and I shake my head slightly.
This went from zero to sixty in ten minutes and I'm terrified something's going to make her run. Scare her away. Affton moans and I smirk. That moan isn't one that says she's about to bolt. I let out a breath, pushing another finger inside her and feel her tighten around me.
“Greedy,” I chuckle, dipping my head and laying kisses from her stomach to her clit before stopping.
Her eyes go wider and she bites her lip, glancing from me to Grant, and I pause, my heart beating out of my chest that she just realized what she's doing. She narrows her eyes at him briefly then looks back at me. “Don't stop,” she whispers and I can feel her pussy throbbing around my fingers.
“I don't plan on it,” I growl, dipping my head again and tasting her.
She tastes so fucking good. My tongue flicks over her clit and she gasps. When I look up at her, she's got her eyes locked on Grant’s across the room and I grin. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought this would happen, but it's too hot to stop now.
I run my tongue over her again and curl my fingers slightly, then latch my mouth around her clit and suck. She whimpers, clamping her lips like she wants to hide the sounds from us, but I want to hear her so I flick my tongue and it brings her eyes to mine as her mouth pops open. I flick then suck and she lets go of the moan she was trying to suppress and her entire body shivers.
“Tommy,” she says, her nails sliding through my hair as her hips lift to push my mouth against her again.
Grant's noise makes her eyes dart to him and when I notice they lock on him and widen, I know he's probably stroking his cock so I don't stop sucking on her clit, flicking my tongue every few seconds.
“Oh my god,” she quietly moans and her eyes bounce from him to me, unable to focus on one of us.
“Let go, Beany,” I whisper, blowing gently on her clit before taking my tongue to her again. “Don't overthink this and just let go.”
Her eyes squeeze shut and she bites her lip as her grip in my hair gets tighter.
Grant’s noises make her eyes pop open. She looks over at him and pushes my face harder between her thighs. He grunts, probably coming, and her hand slaps over her mouth as her thighs start to shake. Pulling her gaze from him, we lock eyes and the torture on her face makes me want to grin, but I don't stop sucking and flicking. Her head drops back as her body bursts into vibrations.
“Fuck!” she screams loud enough it echoes.
I don't let up as her pussy clenches around my fingers. Grant shifting in his chair and his footsteps across the room tell me he's already done. After one more lick I back away and let him watch me pull my fingers out of her, coated with her juices. I lock eyes on her and lick them, then glance up at Grant who's standing next to us now, watching and breathing heavy.
“Damn,” he mutters, shaking his head.
He's lost his shirt since we started this and I can only hope his jizz didn't get on these hardwood floors. I chuckle and shake my head, my dick painfully hard.
“Yeah. Damn.”
Affton stands and moves quickly to pull up her suit bottoms then she looks between us. Now's about the time when I start to regret letting her do that, because the wild look in her eyes and the tremble to her voice scares me half to death.
“Um, night.” She kisses Grant's cheek quickly, then pecks my lips before rushing to the room she was staying in before we decided to be together. Backtracking, she chuckles and shakes her head blurting, “Wrong room,” padding down the hall to my room.
My heart's in my throat when she clicks the door shut and I stare at it, unsure what to do.
“Think we fucked up?” he asks, watching the closed door.
I don't. At least I hope we didn't.
“I haven't even slept with her yet,” I mutter, panic starting to surface.
“No fucking way!” he blurts, laughing and slapping my back. “You two are somethin’ else.”
I rub the back of my neck, her smell all over me.
“Hey, make sure you didn't get shit on my floors, man.” I nod toward the chair he was in and he whines at me like I'm the little bitch for asking him to clean up his mess.
“I got it, fuck,” he says, then throws me a smirk. “But that was pretty fun.”
“Yeah.” I sigh. “I'm going make sure she's okay. You good making yourself at home?”
“I practically lived here before Affton came back. I'm sure I can manage.” He uses his shirt to wipe up the floor. “Hey, if she is in there freaking out right now, apologize for me.”
I wave him off and step toward my bedroom door, taking a deep breath before turning the handle. “Bean?” I whisper, walking into the dark room. “You alright?”
“Hey,” she says groggily. “Yeah. Totally.” That didn't sound convincing at all.
“Alright,” I say, crawling into bed and scooping her into my arms. “Spill it. You've never fallen asleep that fast after an orgasm so I know you weren't in here already asleep.”
“I'm drunk...we're drunk.” She groans and shifts to her back. “What we just did...that was Grant.” I feel her head shaking and chuckle.
“That was me and you, Beany. Sure, Grant was there, but that was all us. And it was hot as hell. I know for a fact you enjoyed it.” I smirk and push her hair from her face. “Talk to me. If it freaked you out it never has to happen again. I promise.”
“I just don't want you to think I want Grant like that.” She quickly turns to face me and pulls me closer. “Because I don't. I want you, and yes I liked it, but not because it was Grant. God, Tommy, we haven't even had sex yet and I just don't want you to think Grant's the reason I did that. It was the whole thing. Me and you, and just someone watching. God,” she mutters into her hands covering her face.
“Hey,” I wrap my arms around her. “I know you don't like him like that, trust me.” I laugh. “Bean, I honestly thought you hated the guy for the longest time. He's my best friend though, so the fact that you two can stand each other enough to do something like that is amazing. I trust him, and I trust you, and I know the emotion of not knowing how to feel after that. The first time we did it I think I stayed piss-roaring drunk for three days because I didn't want to face the truth of what we did.” I chuckle again. “That,” I kiss her nose and lock eyes with her. “Was hot as fuck, Affton.”
Her hand slides down my stomach and her fingertips dip into the front of my boxers while she sucks my bottom lip into her mouth. “I want you,” she whispers, pushing her hand downward to grip my cock.
I groan and push my lips to hers harder, trying to stay as still as possible even though all I want is to fucking rip her clothes off and fuck her senseless. “You sure about this, Bean?” I mumble against her lips. Her fist tightens around me and I groan louder. “God, Affton.” I let out a strangled chuckle before she sucks my lip into her mouth again.
She shifts me to my back and is straddling me before I even realize she's taken her shorts off. She's sinking over me before I'm ready and her moan fills my bedroom, probably alerting Grant to our second round.
“I take it you really fuckin' liked that out there,” I groan, gripping her thighs tight. She’s wet. Incredibly wet, and when she starts rocking her hips I curse. “Fuck, you feel good, Bean.”
Her thrusts become harder and her nails scratch down my chest. “I've needed this for so fucking long, Tommy.” She moans loudly again and she rides me fast and hard.
I'm in fucking heaven. This is heaven.
“I love you, Affton,” I murmur, the words falling so freely from my mouth and the minute they do I panic because they weren't meant for now.
She groans in pleasure and slams her lips to mine, still working my cock. “I need you.” She kisses me. “I need this.” Her pussy's tightening around me and she's starting to move faster. “You're what I've always needed.” Sharp fingernails claw into my shoulders as she comes and I feel her come cover my balls and the sheet. “Fuck, I love you. I love you!” Her mouth covers mine while she whimpers through her orgasm.
I thrust up, holding her tight against me and she moans. I hit her deep and it doesn't take long for my own orgasm to rip through me. I moan into our kiss, never losing our connection and not letting her pull away even after I'm done.
“You love me?” I whisper, pushing my lips to her neck.
“It's hard not to.” She murmurs into my pillow by my ear. “You're what I need.” Her face turns to nuzzle into my beard.
“Well I've known that our whole lives, Beany.” I chuckle and hug her tight against me, still trying to catch my breath. We lay in each other’s arms until she's almost asleep and a knock comes at the door.
“Y’all did it! Fuck yes!” Grant yells from the hallway, then music starts blaring through my house. Celebration music.
“Fuck off, Grant!” We both yell in unison and the music stops abruptly, but Affton and I are both laughing now.
“He means well, most days.” I say, grinning and shifting so we're on our sides and my arms are still around her.
“He's an idiot,” she mutters tiredly and chuckles. “I love you,” whispers from her lips and she kisses me softly.
“I love you, too.” I nuzzle my nose to hers, my chest finally happy, my heart finally light. I got my girl back.
The next week and a half flies by in a blur. Having Affton back is something I've wanted since she left, but a long time ago I settled on it not happening. But she's here, and she seems to like it here. I haven't broached the subject of her phone yet. The day after she came home from her trip I handed it over to her and didn't ask what she was going to do with it. A few hours after I gave it to her she walked in my room, crawled in my bed and cried in my arms for almost an hour until she fell asleep. I know she's read the messages, and my heart hurts for her, but I wouldn't change the situation. Not one fucking bit.
It's been a long day on the ranch today, so I'm ready to be home with my girl. She's been coming with me and hanging out around the farm, helping with things, but today she wanted to stay back. I finally trust her enough not to worry about her leaving anymore. I walk in the house and she's sitting at the table, staring at her phone screen and I immediately worry that I know the real reason she wanted to stay behind today. We're too busy living in the right-now to try and fix the shit storm we caused, but I know it needs to be fixed.
“Hey,” I say, kicking my boots off by the door and walking over to her, wrapping my arms around her from behind while pushing my lips to her neck. “I like coming home to you,” I whisper before standing up and stretching out. “Whatcha doin’?”
She looks from me to her phone then sets it down. “Damage control. I've spoken to my lawyer. LAPD. And Corey's lawyer today.” She stands and slides her fingers through her hair. “He just wants to talk.”
When I look at her, her eyes go to her phone again. “Not happening,” I growl. “Did he sign the papers? He doesn't know where you are, does he? What'd his lawyer say?” I’m fucking shaking now because this is all too damn real. He wants to talk? Fuck no he doesn't. I read those texts he sent her. That's not a mentally stable man.
“His lawyer wants us to sit down with my lawyer, but I have to go back to L.A.” Before I can interrupt her, she puts her hand out. “My lawyer advised against that after I...told him.” She closes her eyes and shakes her head. “Corey does not know where I am. But I had to tell the police because they have video footage of four men abducting me from my home, Tommy. I'm supposed to show my face in the station by Saturday.”
My head won't stop shaking back and forth. “No.” I storm to the kitchen, needing a fucking beer. “No. You're not fucking going back there. I just got you back, I'm not fucking losing you again. Not to him. Not to that city. Can't they video call or some shit?” I’m getting way too worked up and when I look at her she looks too goddamned calm.
“It's in my lawyer's hands now. If I want to file a restraining order, I have to go there and my lawyer said that should have been the first step I took.” She sits back down and grabs her phone.
“Filing a restraining order is like telling a child not to lick the melting ice cream in their hand. That won't do anything for a man like him.”
She looks at me and the look on her face turns from calm to desperation. I don't know how to help her.
“If they force you to come in, I'm going with you. Grant can fly us so we won't have to drive then we'll have more muscle to kill that fucker,” I growl, clenching my fists. “Goddammit.” I pull the chair out and sit next to her, pushing her phone out of her hands and taking them in mine. “Beany, this ain’t over. Your lawyer... He seem pretty smart? Good at his job?”
“Yes, he's extremely intelligent and knows his job so I think I should do what he said. We...w-we can fly to L.A. and I'll file the restraining order.” Her grip tightens. “But you promised, Tommy.” She looks me dead in the eyes. “You promised we'd stop this. Fighting violence with violence isn't going to stop this.”
I pull her hands to my lips, closing my eyes because the rage is burning and I really don't want her to see it. I hate that this makes me angry enough I feel like I can't control it. The last thing she needs is another violent man in her life, but I'd never hurt her. I can't promise the douche that did this is safe if I ever get my hands on him though.
“Just in case, Beany. The minute he gets word that you're there he's...” I clear my throat. “Can we just do it all in a day? In and out in a few hours? Maybe he doesn't even have to know.” Fuck, this is making me uneasy.
“Yes.” She nods and that Affton smile pushes on her face. “Yes, if Grant can do that, that's what we'll do. My lawyer told me not to contact him. He doesn't need to know my whereabouts. Just in and out. We'll file and see my lawyer for the next steps. Just one thing.” She clears her throat and pulls her hands away. “It's against the law in the state of California, what we're doing.”
“Yeah.” I stand and pull her to me, wrapping my arms around her. She’s my girl, but I know we have to keep that under wraps. “I love you, Beany.” I take a deep breath. “Let me call Grant and we'll get this worked out.” I want to talk about what happens next. Now that it's finally out to her lawyer and the police will be called off....what's next? She's not going back to California and she better not be considering working at that company anymore. That shit's not going to fly.
“Okay.” She nods, forcing her smile now. “I love you, Tommy.” Her head's still nodding like she's lost inside it.
“Hey.” I tug at her chin, smirking at her when her eyes hit mine. “This is all going to be fine. I promise you.” I push my lips to hers and drink in her sweet taste.
“I know.” She smiles against my mouth but the second her phone goes off, she jumps with a yelp, quickly covering her mouth and I see her hands trembling. “It's my lawyer,” she says, her eyes on the phone. “You call Grant, I'll take this.” Grabbing the phone, she won't even look at me before she walks out the back door.
I sit at the table and run my hand through my hair. I wish I knew what the hell's going on over there, but I know if she wants to keep me in the loop she will. Later.
I pull my phone out and call Grant.
“Yo,” he answers, the music from the shop almost so loud I can't hear him.
“Hey, can you step out for a minute?”
“Sure thing.” I hear the music disappear and he clears his throat. “So uh...everything alright?”
We haven't talked much since what happened here at the house. Grant's one of those friends that's always there even if he isn't, so it's not unusual for us, but after what happened here that night I'm sure he's waiting to hear how Affton is.
“Not really,” I mutter, my brain too deep in this shit to even start to process what I'm about to ask him. “We need a plane. And a pilot. This week.” I watch Affton put her hand over her face as she listens to whatever her lawyer's telling her.
“We? Why? Where?” Grant blurts, his tone more serious than I'm used to.
“California. Affton's on the phone with her lawyer. There's legal things she's got to get taken care of but, Grant...” I curse under my breath. “We need in and out. Her husband gets wind of this and shit's going down, and I promised her shit wouldn't go down.”
“That's a stupid thing to promise, Barns,” he growls. “That asshole has it coming.”
“Can we focus here?” I blurt. “Will you fly us to California? I’ll pay you of course.”
“Shut the fuck up. You know I will. You pay for the fuel. What day you thinking?”
“I'll text you later and let you know. From the looks of it, probably tomorrow or the next day.”
“Shit,” he huffs. “That's fine. Don't worry, I'm on it. Hit me up as soon as you know something.”
He ends the call and I stare out the window.
She's nodding, saying something and I wish my windows were open so I could hear what's going on out there. When I see her end the call she slowly sets the phone on the table and her eyes hit the horizon. She's got too much going on in that head of hers, and if I know Affton she's out there overthinking everything. I finish my beer and stand, steeling myself for the conversation that's more than likely going to end in us taking a trip to the one state I never wanted either of us to set foot in again.
I walk out to the porch without saying anything, sitting in the chair across from her and reach over the table, taking her hand in mine. We sit here in silence until the sun's completely gone from the sky.
“Did you talk to Grant?” Her thumb mindlessly rubs over the same spot on my finger and it's driving me insane. Her mind isn't here with me right now.
“Yeah, he's good any day this week. We just gotta make the call.”
Watching her, it’s like the person she was when she was with that asshole is resurfacing. The real Affton, the strong Affton is going back into hiding. Just another reason why I can't wait to kick this fucker's ass. I know I promised her I wouldn't seek it out, but he's the type of person that starts his own battles so I know he'll be begging for it when the time comes.
“Just as soon as you can. My lawyer wants me to press charges,” she says in a quiet tone and I can hear the fear. “I don't want to do that. If I press charges, I have to stay, and if I press charges, there's no chance he'll just let this go. I just want to give him the out. I won't tell anyone, you know? I just want him to leave me alone.” She bites her lip to keep from crying.
I stand and pull her out of her seat, bringing her over to me and onto my lap. My arms wrap tightly around her and I hold her, because I have nothing to say that's going to make this better. I want the charges pressed. If I'm not allowed to kick his ass, then let the fucker sit in prison and get that ass handled by his new boyfriends. But...I know that's not how it'll go. He's got too much money; he'd end up buying his way out with money and power and then he'd come after her tenfold. She's right, he just needs to go away.
“I'll text Grant tonight that we need it tomorrow. That way it’s over and done and we can start to move on.” I kiss her head softly. “I'm so ready to move on with you, Beany.”
“That's all I want.” She lays her head on my shoulder. “After I handle this, I'll figure out a job.” Sitting up, she looks me in the eyes. “That's when—” Her phone starts to ring and she reaches for it, when I see his name on the screen I yank the phone out of her hand. “Tommy, don’t!” she blurts, slowly taking it from me like it's a bomb.
We watch it until it stops ringing and minutes later he sends a text. All it says is 'Check your profile’. With a shaking hand, she opens her account and her thumb presses a recently posted video. When the visual of her getting fucked fills the screen and the noises rattle the speakers, she drops the phone and jumps out of my lap. In tears and a trembling mess, she tries to delete the video but she can barely keep herself standing. I take the phone, my own hands shaking but I manage to get it deleted before she has too many views. There were still quite a lot, but maybe we caught it in time.
“Bean,” I whisper, walking over to her. She's frantic, tears streaming down her face and I have to battle just to get my arms around her to try and calm her down. My phone buzzes in my pocket and immediately I groan. I can only fucking imagine who it is.
With an arm still tight around her, I reach into my back pocket and yank out my phone, answering Grant's call.
“Yeah?” I mumble.
“Tommy...” He sounds baffled. “Dude, I was just online...”
“Stop,” I blurt. “Ignore it and stop. That wasn't her,” I say, knowing full well it was my girl on that screen.
“She okay?” He knows, how could he not?
“No.” I end the call and wrap my arm around her again. She's still crying but she's stopped shaking. “Let's get inside, Bean. No more phone for you tonight, alright?”
“He's going to ruin me. I have to go back to him. He's going to ruin my entire career. This will ruin my life. I have to go back,” she keeps rambling and my heart breaks all over again.
“No. Stop and listen to me. He's not going to ruin your career. We're getting these papers filled out and doing whatever the fuck your lawyer thinks we need to tomorrow, then we're coming back here. You're going to find another kickass company to work for and we'll go from there. He's not ruining anything and there's no way in hell I'll let you go back to him.” I know she's panicked and she didn't mean the words she just muttered. Hell, she probably won't remember it tomorrow, but it’s still fucking with me. “Come on, let's take a shower and go to bed.” I need to text Grant still but that can happen later. Right now I need her out of this state she's in.
The minute she steps into the shower my phone starts to ring again and I groan. I'd just ignore it, but it's Brandt and when he calls this late at night it's never anything good.
“Make it quick, Kenshaw,” I answer, kicking my jeans off to join her in the shower.
“Berta's in labor,” he says. “She's not doin' so good, Tommy. You need to get out here.”
Berta's their oldest goat that somehow got herself knocked up. From the looks of how big she is she's either having a massive fucking kid or there are multiples in there. I let out a frustrated groan and my head falls back. I have to go, but I can't leave Affton right now.
“Yeah, I'll be there soon,” I mutter, ending the call and setting the phone on the counter. “Hey, Beany?”
She turns in the shower to look at me, her arms covering her chest. My gaze flits to her shield and I narrow my eyes. She's regressed an entire fucking month with just one act from that bastard.
“Brandt's having issues on the ranch tonight.” God, I feel like an asshole for this. “But I'm going to need to get over there and I need you to come with me.” There's no way I'm leaving her here right now. I know for a fact that in her right mind she wouldn't ever think about going back to that man, but tonight ruined that state of mind.
“I can't stay?” she asks in confusion.
“I may need help,” I lie. “Plus it could be fun.” I push a smile to my lips and pull my jeans back on. “Baby goats.” I wiggle my eyebrows even though I feel anything but playful with her right now. I need to snuggle her. I need my arms around her, in my bed.
For my sake, she smiles and moves slowly to get out of the shower, trying to hide her body from me. I hate when she hides her body from me. Fucking hate it. And I hate the fact that all she's doing is being compliant again. All this time I thought we finally had our girl back, but...fuck! I huff and growl, taking the towel away from her and pushing her hands down, forcing her to look me in the eyes.
“Don't do this, Beany,” I whisper. “Don't go back there. Get out of your head, it's a dangerous place to be right now.”
“Please don't be mad at me,” she says with a tremble to her voice.
“I'm not mad at you, Bean. Jesus.” I pull her in for a hug. “I'm upset at the situation but not at you. Never at you, you hear me?” Leaning back I cup her face in my hands. How one man has that much power over someone is beyond me. “Do you want to come with me tonight?” I'll give her the option and just pray she takes the easy choice. “Because if you want to be here alone, I get it.” I'll have her brother watch the house, but that's another shit storm I'm not sure I'm ready for tonight. Thank god he didn't see the video.
She's staring at the wall a minute before she nods. “What's it mean if I'm afraid I'll do something stupid if you leave me here alone?” she whispers.
“It means he's almost lost his grip on you.” I rest my forehead on hers. “It means...” It means she's starting to use her brain instead of the fight or flight she's so used to. “It means you're more country than you thought you were.” And it means she loves me like she's been saying.
She laughs and grips me tight. “That's over the line.”
“A man can dream.” I push my lips to hers. “It's totally up to you, but I think you'd have fun at the ranch tonight. Who can resist baby goats?” I smirk at her and a slow, small smile spreads on her lips.
“I can't resist the sexy vet.” She leans in for a kiss, slowly coming back to me.
We leave her phone in a drawer on silent in the spare bedroom after she texts her lawyer that she'll be out tomorrow. On the way to the ranch I call Grant and set up the flight and by the time we get there she's been silent the entire drive.
“I haven't been so excited to spend time in a barn overnight as I am right now.” I nudge her as we walk for the barn door.
“I...” She starts to laugh. “Don't share your enthusiasm but I appreciate yours.” Her real smile's back as she looks over at me.
“Ginnie's going to have a new best friend by the end of the night!” I give her a little dance as we walk through the barn to the goat pens in the back and I can't help but laugh.
“What was that!” She laughs. “Do that again.”
I roll my eyes, but because I like my girl's laugh so much I stop and do it again, a little more dramatic this time and she rolls in laughter.
“This ain’t a strip club, Barns!” Brandt yells from the back of the barn. “Get your ass over here. I've never done this before! Whose idea was it for us to get goats anyway?” He curses and pulls off his hat, swiping at his head.
I glance back at Affton and take her hand in mine. “It was mine,” I whisper, making her giggle harder.
“Even Kenshaw can't say no to you.”
“It's the magic dick,” I whisper before stepping around the door and into the goat pens.
She's laughing, but stays on the other side, looking over the wall with a look of excitement on her face.
“What's up?” I walk over to Bertha and kneel down. She's resting her head on Brandt's knee and breathing heavy.
“Something's not right, I don't know. Google didn't teach me how to help pull a kid from a goat, but that thing's stuck and I don't think there's just one in there.” He runs his hand over her head.
I spend an hour on that barn floor with Brandt, making sure this baby goat gets out safe. I've done a ton of kid birthing's but never anything like this one. Maybe it's the unusual amount of stress I'm in tonight with everything else going on that I figured I was bound to fail this. But when that kid comes out and starts breathing on his own I let out a small victory cheer.
“Bean, grab that towel,” I blurt, motioning to the bench on the other side of the pen.
She does what I ask quicker than expected but she's been practically biting her nails the past hour. After tending to the kid, I stand. The mom's still uncomfortable and from the looks of it there's another one on the way. Walking over to Affton, I smile at her and hold the swaddled goat out to her.
“All you gotta do is bounce it. Like... Think of dancing. While holding a baby goat.” I chuckle at the look she's giving me.
“B-bounce it?” She slowly takes the swaddled kid. “Bounce it,” she repeats and glances at Brandt before doing what I asked.
I watch her for a moment and my chest warms seeing her so focused on making sure this kid's healthy, then I move back to the doe for another round. This time isn't as easy as the first, and when we finally can see what's going on we see that the other kid is breech and hasn't made any progress for too long. Brandt's a ball of nerves but I know what the end game is here before it's even official. She's not going to make it. I'll be lucky if the mom makes it through this the way the baby's positioned.
It takes an hour full of curse words and silence, and when it's all over there's a knot in my throat threatening to break free. Brandt's jaw is set as his eyes lock on the mom, trying not to look at the stillborn.
“I'm sorry, Berta,” he whispers, running his hand down her back.
This part of the job is never easy, and it's never fun. Two kids, but only one to raise. I look up at Affton, the pure joy I had completely gone. She's still bouncing the kid and I meant to tell her she only had to do it for a few minutes but I lost track of the last hour or so.
“Baby two didn't make it,” I say, standing up and walking over to Affton.
The look on her face makes my gut twist. I thought bringing her here tonight would be good for her, but it turned to shit like everything else has tonight.
“I'm gonna get things cleaned up. You alright with that one?” Brandt's tone is less enthusiastic than it was earlier. He's been a rancher his entire life. It’s in his blood and animals having a stillborn is just a part of life. Doesn't make it any easier in the moment though.
“Yeah.” She nods, holding the goat closer and glancing toward the stillborn before turning her back. When she nuzzles her face to the kid in her arms, I can't tear my eyes from her.
“What should we name him?” I ask, walking around her and leaning back on the workbench, watching her coddle this goat that needs to get on its feet and start feeding soon. I don't have the heart to tell her she needs to put him down yet though.
“I can name him?” She grins at me.
“Sure.” I shrug. “Why not?”
“S...Sa...mmm...Simon.”
I smile wide, because she looks so proud to name this kid.
“I love it. Simon and Ginnie.” I smirk, walking over to her and pushing my lips to hers before locking our gazes. “We gotta put Simon down now so he can go eat.”
“Oh.” She laughs. “Right.” Her cheeks turn pink as she hands him over to me. “He became my baby for a while there.”
“I think he likes you.” I slowly set him on the ground and it takes him a few failed attempts to figure out how to walk correctly but when he does he makes a beeline for his mom. “Thank you for your help tonight. We couldn’t have done this without you, Bean.” I nudge her. I want to wrap my arms around her but I also need a very hot, very soapy shower.
“I'm not sure about that, but getting a glimpse at your job was exciting.” She's staring at me like earlier tonight didn't happen, but when Brandt clears his throat, she moves away.
Today's been one massive roller coaster ride, and I'll be glad when tomorrow's over.
We head home and I wrap my arms around her in bed, just breathing her in and trying to figure out how to keep her here. Because if after all of this, she still wants to leave? I can't. I can't do that to my dad or to myself, because I know for a fact I won't be happy anywhere else. Call me selfish, but I've seen how happy she's been here when the weight of the world isn't on her shoulders.
I know she can be that happy again.