Chapter 15
Michelle woke up the next morning feeling sick to her stomach, but she wasn’t sure whether it was because she was nervous about what the doctor was going to say or if it was morning sickness. Once she threw up though, she had a pretty clear idea.
Brett was waiting outside, his bright red car parked beside a row of motorcycles. He was staring at his watch and tapping his foot impatiently.
“We’re going to be late if we don’t hurry!” he exclaimed, opening the door for her and then climbing into the driver’s seat.
“Relax, Brett,” Michelle laughed. “It only takes us like 12 minutes to get to town from here.”
Still, Brett’s anxiety didn’t diminish until the second they crossed the threshold into the waiting room. Michelle explained about her appointment and then she was left in the waiting room with Brett, who had visibly relaxed since his white-knuckled drive to the doctor’s office.
“Do you think getting tested for a baby will hurt?” Michelle asked. The truth was that she had never considered any of what having a child might entail. Sure, she had daydreamed about one day having the perfect little family- one where Alan was the kind and doting breadwinner and she was able to stay at home with the little ones and see to it that they had a great upbringing. But needless to say, all of those dreams had gone out the window and they would never come back again.
“I’m sure it won’t hurt,” Brett said quickly. “They’ll probably just have you pee in a cup.”
Michelle sighed and nodded and waited until it was her turn.
“Michelle Warren?”
Michelle’s heart thudded hard in her chest.
Whatever the doctor had to say to her about this would determine the rest of her life. If the pregnancy test was right and she was expecting a child, she would probably have to leave the MC. She wouldn’t force Blade into taking care of a baby that he didn’t want. It was time for her to start thinking about her best plan of action.
Brett had promised to help her go over her options when they found out for sure whether or not she was pregnant, and she suddenly found herself wishing she had had that conversation with him before the appointment. Now, she felt like she was grasping at air with nothing beneath her to catch her in case she fell.
“Yes, that’s me,” Michelle said, standing up awkwardly. Her legs were like jelly, and she stepped forward toward the kind-looking nurse, her heart constricted tightly in her chest.
She would be fine. Even if it meant that she had to find somewhere to live outside of the MC’s protection, she would find a place where Alan couldn’t get to her. Right?
But the uncertainty of the situation made her want to cry and the nurse looked at her with an understanding smile and touched her shoulder kindly.
“Let’s go,” she said.
Michelle nodded and glanced back at Brett as one last tendril of panic fought its way through her.
“Good luck!” he said in a stage whisper. “I’ll be here when you get back.”
Michelle nodded. She would just have to brave this part out by herself. Who knew? Maybe from then on, she would have a baby to take along for the ride.
***
“Michie, are you all right?”
“For the last time, Blade, go away. I don’t want to see you right now.”
“But…”
“I said no!”
“I made you something to eat. You can’t just keep on going without food. Especially not with a baby in you. You’re eating for two now.”
Michelle opened the door and glared Blade in the eye.
“That’s none of your business,” she growled. “After the way you treated the only man who’s been here for me through this, do you think I’d eat anything you made me? I don’t even want to talk to you!”
Blade glared at her.
“Look, me and the little dude are square about that now. You’re the only one here holding a grudge!”
“Yeah! And I’m also the only one carrying a baby,” Michelle retorted.
“Christ! You’re acting like I did something to hurt you. All I’ve ever done is to try to be there for you and you’re treating me like I’m nothing but some common criminal!” Blade exclaimed, his eyes furiously blue as he stared down at her.
“You kind of are, Blade! The MC is under surveillance for a reason!”
Blade scoffed. “Yeah! Because of you. Don’t act like I wasn’t willing to step up for you and the baby, Michelle. You didn’t even tell me about it! You told Brett before I even had any idea! I thought we were closer than that!”
Blade stormed off, letting the door close in Michelle’s face. She stared at his back and felt another surge of anger course through her. Not only was he acting as if he hadn’t been on the same page as she was about being just friends, but now he was practically blaming her for not knowing how to break the news to him. Was it such a crime to want to be sure about something before you turned someone else’s life upside down? Apparently to Blade it was. He was the most stubborn, selfish man she had ever met.
Well, technically that title went to Alan, but still. Blade was a close second.
And for the past month, he had thought that making her food she didn’t want to touch and asking how she was would make up for the fact that he had assaulted one of the gentlest people she’d ever met. She just couldn’t let it go. Not when it meant that she would be agreeing to let him into her life with a baby involved. It was just too risky. She couldn’t let herself be with another man like Alan. To be honest, seeing his temper like that, right there in front of her, had been a terrifying reminder of all the horrible things she had gone through with her soon-to-be ex-husband.
But she couldn’t find a way to tell that to Blade. No matter how hard he tried to make things up to her and take care of Michelle and the baby, there was just nothing he could do to erase that memory of his temper from her mind. She was afraid of him. Plain and simple. But the one thing she had learned from being with Alan was that if a man scared you that way, you would be much, much better off if he didn’t know it.
Michelle sighed. Being cooped up in the MC all the time was starting to drive her crazy. She listened at the door for a few moments to make sure that Blade was nowhere in sight before sneaking downstairs. She took the secret path in the back of the club to escape onto the road, where she was finally able to have a breath by herself.
Well, she wasn’t technically alone. Somewhere in her womb was the beginning of a child, who may look like her, or who could possibly favor Blade. It seemed impossible that Blade would have a child who looked anything less than identical to him. Everything about him was strong and fierce. His genetic code was probably just as headstrong.
Michelle strolled along absently, letting all of her anxieties and worries melt away. It was nice having some time to clear her head. She certainly wasn’t getting any with Blade and she hadn’t been able to call Jo for an escape to her house. If she did, she knew that she would let the pregnancy slip and more importantly, who the father was.
And not only that, but she knew Jo well enough by then to know that there would be a big hullaballoo about how great it was that Blade was a father. Jo would push him to step up and Michelle would feel obligated in a way to accept him. She just wasn’t ready for that level of attention yet. Especially when she was still so angry and afraid of him.
“Well look who I have here,” a familiar, chilling voice said suddenly.
“No,” Michelle whispered, whipping around.
Michelle’s blood turned to ice as she came face to face with her worst nightmare. Alan grinned, looking her up and down with an evil smirk on his face. She should have stayed in the MC. What the hell had she been thinking?
“You look different,” Alan said, peering at her closely. “Did you gain weight or something? I don’t think I like it.”
She wanted to defy him, to take some of the attitude of the bikers she had grown to love and, and tell Alan to go fuck himself. But the words wouldn’t come. When she was alone with him, she was frozen. He had done a number on her, physically and mentally. She wasn’t prepared to face him. Not now. Not alone.
“Well, I’m sure you’ll get back to your old self in no time,” Alan said. “Put you back in one of those pretty little dresses we bought you. Like the ones for the dinners at the department. You always did look sexy in those.”
“What do you want, Alan?” Michelle asked, finally finding her voice.
“I want my wife to come home, where she belongs,” Alan said, his eyes beady and cold.
The idea of going back with Alan terrified her. Michelle looked frantically for an escape route – anything she could do to try to outsmart him and run like hell – but they were on an open dirt road, with a field on one side and forest on the other. Unfortunately, Alan was standing between Michelle and the cover of the trees, so her position wasn’t ideal, to say the least.
Again, she tried to find her voice, but there was nothing she could say to take the sadistic smile off his face, and it would be foolish to even try.
“Please,” she whispered.
“I don’t owe you anything,” Alan said. “You ran away from me like I was some sort of a monster! Do you have any idea how that makes me feel?”
“Alan…”
But there was nothing she could say to reason with him. She already knew that.
“Who’s that biker guy everyone keeps seeing you around with?” Alan asked, his voice suddenly dark.
“I don’t know who you…”
“Don’t play dumb with me!” Alan shouted, stepping toward Michelle and grabbing her arm. “I’ve seen pictures of the two of you! You think the officers on duty here just twiddle their thumbs here?”
“No,” Michelle growled. “They answer to you, don’t they? And the only reason they’re here is because for the first time in my life, I’ve had the courage to do what was best for me!”
“What is best for you is to go home!” Alan roared, shaking Michelle’s arm hard. She grimaced in pain, though she knew that it was only going to get worse.
“What makes you think you know what’s best for everyone?”
Michelle and Alan both froze at the sound of a deep voice to their left and Michelle’s heart soared. Blade was standing there, with an entourage of bikers standing behind him, each of them reaching into their back pockets to pull out their weapons of choice.
“You stay out of this! I know what you’ve been doing with my wife!” Alan screamed, tightening his grip on Michelle’s wrist.
“Oh, so you know she’s pregnant with my kid, then,” Blade said, smiling smugly. This was as much a shock to the other bikers as it was to Alan, and everybody murmured to themselves as Alan’s face went from flesh-toned to deep red.
“You have no idea what you’re talking about!” Alan exclaimed, raising his hand to strike Michelle. “You whore!”
Before Alan had a chance to make contact with Michelle, Blade was in between them, his huge, muscular body creating a barrier between Michelle and Alan. Michelle scrambled to join the protective group of bikers, but before she could, Alan used one of his police moves to roll out of Blade’s way and jump to his feet again. He tore at Michelle with everything he had. Blade whipped around just in time to see Michelle fall to the ground hard.
Pain engulfed her every nerve ending and she writhed on the ground.
“Somebody help her up!” Blade demanded, taking a swing at Alan that missed. “You should not have done that, pigfucker.”
Alan’s eyes narrowed and Michelle suddenly felt her body become weightless as two of the bikers carried her to the side of the road and sat her down gently.
“Are you all right, Michie?” Blade shouted over the sounds of Alan’s growling. Michelle gazed at Blade beating the holy hell out of Alan, her mind in a fog. She nodded dumbly, not sure what else to do.
“I’m going to kill you!” Alan shrieked again, lunging at Blade and growling furiously. Everybody groaned as a sickening thud filled the air and suddenly Alan was lying on the ground, unconscious.
“You stupid shit!” Blade shouted down to him. “You’re lucky I don’t fuckin’ kill you right now!”
But Alan couldn’t hear him and Michelle suddenly felt a shooting pain up her abdomen. She bent over, moaning out loudly.
“Michie!”
She lost consciousness just in time to feel Blade’s strong hands around her shoulders as she slumped lifelessly against his broad chest.
Something was wrong with the baby.