19
I sit at the kitchen table and blow into my coffee cup, deep in thought.
“What are you going to do?” Jen asks.
I shrug. “Go to work, do my job.” I pause for a moment. “Ring Eliza and beg for my bar job back. Carry on as usual.”
She picks up the letter for the DNA testing and rereads it for the tenth time. “So you have to go to this medical centre tonight?”
I nod. “He’s meeting us there.”
She blows out a deflated breath and shakes her head. “Shit, this is horrible.”
I smirk. “This isn’t horrible. This is a relief. What’s horrible is not being able to tell your son who his father is.” I widen my eyes. “That’s horrible.”
“What’s going to happen when you see him at work today?”
I shrug. “He’ll probably carry on acting like a spoiled brat, as usual.”
“What about you and him?”
I swallow the lump in my throat. “That’s over. He screwed any chance of that last night when I told him I loved him and he threw it back in my face.”
Jen frowns and grabs my hand over the table. “He’s just in shock, Ash.”
“I don’t care.” I sip my coffee. “I may be a lot of things, Jen, but weak isn’t one of them.”
She smiles sadly.
“I didn’t get myself through med school being a single parent just by fluke. I can do this on my own. I don’t want anything from him. He can go fuck himself.”
“Far out, Ash,” she whispers as she runs her hands through her hair.
“Owen starts preschool tomorrow, remember?” I smile. “That means you’ll get some more time to yourself.”
“God, that’s the last thing on my mind,” she mutters into her tea.
“Did you speak to our neighbor while you were away?”
She smiles. “I did actually. We messaged each other every day.”
My eyes widen. “Really?”
She giggles. “Yeah, but he kind of wrecked it last night.”
“Why?”
“He sent me a cock shot. Why do guys assume we want to see their junk?”
I smile broadly. “Because they’re idiots and they think dicks are pretty.” I shake my head. “Can I see it?” I ask.
She widens her eyes. “No. For my eyes only.”
I smirk and raise an eyebrow. “How was it?”
“Fucking awesome,” she whispers and I laugh.
“Why don’t you go over there tonight and get an action shot?” I smile.
She smiles excitedly. “Maybe.” She bites her bottom lip in thought. “I need some serious laser on my bits, though.”
“Try and get an appointment today.”
“Yeah, I will.” She looks over at me and takes my hand again in hers. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
I nod and fake a smile. I’m not. I’m so not okay, but I can’t fall in a heap. This is about Owen now and what he needs.
My needs don’t matter anymore.
I wait in the corridor with the other interns as we wait for Dr. Stanton to arrive. There’s a fire in my belly, a simmering ember that is starting to burn. When he served me with those papers this morning, he lit a match inside of me.
How dare he question me saying he’s the father? Does he really think I’m stupid enough to try and trick him? He obviously thinks I’m loose and fuck around. I’ve slept with two damn men in six years, and then he questions if I’m lying about my own son’s paternity.
He must think I’m stupid.
More fool him.
The only thing questionable here is his character.
He’s a good man, a little voice screams from deep within, and I know it’s true. I just hope that one day we can become amicable, but at the moment I’m just so damn disappointed. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever felt this let down by anyone in my life.
He comes into view around the corner, and I drop my head so I don’t have to look at him.
“Good morning, everyone.” He smiles casually.
“Hello,” I murmur along everyone, without making eye contact.
“I trust you all had a good night?” he asks.
My nostrils flare. Just shut the fuck up and start the rounds, asshole.
“I’m a bit tired from my hot date last night.” Amber smiles stupidly.
Oh God, cringe. Shut up. Her open flirting with Cameron is really grating on my nerves.
A trace of a smile crosses Cameron’s face before he hides it. “Excellent.” He smirks. “At least someone around here is having hot dates,” he adds.
The group laughs.
Don’t look at him. Do not look at him. Don’t fucking look at him.
How about I put a hot poker up your ass, dipshit? Does that count as a hot date?
Because it’s totally doable.
He starts his rounds and I follow at the back of the group. He’s being his usual, witty, fun self, while I’m over here internally drowning in blood from my broken, furious heart.
We get to Gloria’s room and Cameron smiles cheekily. “How is my favorite girl today?” He smiles.
She frowns and fake coughs. “Not too good today, doctor.”
He picks up her chart and reads it as he softly takes her hand in his. Gloria smiles up at him. I snap my eyes away in disgust.
Watching him here being so kind and fun with everyone while he totally ignores me is hard to take. Maybe I should ask for a transfer to Jameson’s team?
Yeah, maybe that’s a good idea. I’m going to have to think on that one. The morning rounds seem to take forever and we stop at the café for the usual midmorning coffee where we all sit together. I glance at the spare tables around us and consider sitting somewhere else, but I know it will stand out to the others that something is wrong.
I stand behind Cameron as he waits in line. Amber is beside him, and if she isn’t careful, I’m going to king hit this bitch.
“Where do you like to go out Dr. Stanton?” She smiles. “I’m new to town and you know… it’s so hard to find descent places to go?”
“Yeah,” he replies, distracted. “I mostly go to friends’ houses and private parties.”
“Oh, really. Are there any parties coming up?” she asks as she runs her fingers through her hair.
The hairs on the back of my neck prickle and I roll my eyes. Please, give me a break.
She’s as subtle as a Mac Truck. I order my coffee and see some of the nurses from reception sitting over in the courtyard. I wave and smile.
Thank God, I’m saved. I’ll go and make conversation with them. I wait for my coffee and head over.
“Hello, Ashley,” they all chirp happily.
“Hi.” I smile. I love these four girls. They’re older, probably mid forties, and really nice. They’re all married with kids and have been around the hospital for years. “How have you all been?” I smile as I take a seat.
“Oh, good,” Tracey replies. “The damn plumbing is playing up, though, and a hot shower is hit and miss.”
“Oh no.” I frown. “That sucks.”
“Did you call that plumber I told you about?” Christine asks her.
I glance over and see Cameron deep in conversation with Amber. I come back to the plumbing conversation.
“He didn’t turn up and he spent all that time quoting. I just found it bizzare.” Tracey shakes her head.
Cameron laughs and I bite my lip so hard I taste blood. I swear to God, I’m going to lose my shit any second.
“Oh, man, will you look at him?” Tracey whispers.
The women all glance over and pretend not to look.
“Who?” I frown.
“Dr. Love.” Christine rolls her eyes and points to Cameron with her chin.
My stomach sinks and I glance back at them only to see Amber throw her had back and release the fakest laugh I’ve ever heard.
“Don’t you ever get involved with him, Ashley. He’s trouble,” Christine tells me.
I fake a smile and sip my coffee. I can’t help myself. I have to ask. “Why is that?”
“He breaks more hearts than he mends.”
“Bit of a player is he?” I ask.
“The worst kind. He sees more nurses in this hospital than patients. Every unmarried nurse in this hospital is in love with him, and he picks and chooses between them to use as his latest play toy.”
My heartbeat thuds.
“He treats them like crap, too,” Tracey whispers. “I don’t know why they put up with it,” she whispers.
I glance back over and right on cue, Amber and he laugh again.
“Treats them like crap?” I frown.
“Yes, tells them straight up that it’s just sex so don’t get any ideas about trying to snag him as their own.”
My heart runs out the bottom of my scrubs and onto the floor in a puddle.
How many women has he slept with?
How many women feel like I do about him?
I was just a number.
I sip my coffee, but I don’t taste it. My taste buds are dying by the second along with my pride.
Oh God, this is a mess. I can’t sit here any longer. I can’t take watching him over there with her, so I stand in a rush. “Catch you later, girls, I have to go make a call.”
I rush out of the cafeteria and down to the courtyard. I need to take back some control. I can feel my life slipping through my fingers. I take out my phone and dial Eliza’s number. She answers on the first ring.
“Hello, Eliza speaking.”
“Hey, Eliza. It’s Ashley.” I quickly correct myself. “I mean Vivienne.”
“Hello, dear.”
“Eliza, I know I left you in the lurch last week, but I was wondering if I could possibly ask for my job back, please?”
She stays silent as she thinks.
“I’m so sorry. I got this new boyfriend and I was trying to please him. I made a stupid decision and now he’s left me anyway,” I blurt out.
“Oh, Ash.” She sighs. “Why on earth would you let a man dictate your job?”
“I don’t know,” I murmur sadly. “Stupidity, I guess.”
She thinks for a moment and I close my eyes. I need this job. “Please...” I beg.
“Alright, come in on Thursday night for your normal shift.”
I smile sadly. “Thank you.”
“Hang on a second, please, Ashley.”
I frown as I wait on.
“Ash, I’ve just checked the roster and we’ve already filled your shift for Thursday night.”
“Oh.” I sigh.
“Maybe you could be on the door or something?”
I bite my bottom lip.
“It’s just one night and then you can go back to the bar.”
I stay silent.
“I really need someone who is flexible, Ashley.”
Shit.
“Can you help me out on Thursday night or not?” she asks.
Fuck, I screw up my face.
“Yeah, that’s fine,” I eventually answer.
“Great, see you at ten.”
I smile. “Thanks, Eliza. I really appreciate it.”
It’s 6.10pm and Owen and I are sitting in waiting room of the medical centre as we wait for Cameron. Of course he’s late. He’s timed it perfectly so he doesn’t have to talk to us.
My heart is in my throat, but Owen is happy enough, playing with his car on the seat.
The door opens and I look up. Cameron’s eyes meet mine and he nods once in acknowledgment. “Hello,” he offers coldly.
“Hello.” I fake a smile and I look to Owen. “Say hello to Cameron, Owie.”
Owen glances up. “Hello, Cameron.” He smiles cheekily.
Pain crosses Cameron’s face as he sees him and forces a smile to his face. “Hello, Owen.”
He sits down opposite us in the waiting room and drops his elbows to his knees, clenching his hands in front of him.
He’s nervous.
I take out my phone and pretend to scroll through it–anything to not see him go through this. Owen drops to his knees and drives his little tuck across the floor as he makes a tractor sound. Cameron’s eyes lift and he watches him in silence. The office door opens and a man comes out in a white coat. “Cameron Stanton?” He smiles.
Cameron stands, fakes a smile, and holds his arm out. “This is Ashley,” he introduces me.
“Hi.” I gesture to Owen. “This is Owen.”
He smiles. “Hello, Owen. That’s a great car you have there.”
Owen smiles. “It’s a truck. Cars don’t have diggers on the front.”
“Oh, yes, I see now.” He chuckles.
“Please, come in.”
The three of us stand and walk awkwardly into the office. Cameron and I sit next to each other. Owen climbs onto my lap and he holds his car up to show Cameron. “It’s blue.”
Cameron smirks. “I can see that.”
“So, we are here today for DNA Paternity testing, yes?” the man asks.
“Yes,” Cameron immediately answers.
“We will need some hair and saliva sample from both of you, and then we will run it through the computer.”
“How long will it take for the results?” Cameron asks.
“We will have the results in a few hours and they will be emailed to you both tonight.”
Cameron frowns and I roll my lips as my eyes find him. He looks like he’s about to vomit.
The doctor hands Cameron a swab. “If you can just brush it around the inside of your mouth, please.”
Cameron nods and takes the swab from him.
“Here, Owen, watch what Cameron does. You’re next,” I tell him.
Owen concentrates as Cameron brushes it around the inside of his mouth and hands it to the technician.
The man smiles and passes me the swab. Owen laughs suddenly aware that everyone is watching him and he is the centre of attention.
“Owen, open your mouth, please,” Cameron says.
My eyes flick to Cameron. Don’t tell my son what to do.
Cut it out, I correct myself. This is hard.
Owen opens his mouth and chuckles loudly and I hold back tears. If only he knew the significance of this test and how it’s going to change everything for him.
“Ahh.” He giggles.
My nerves get the better of me. “Don’t be silly, Owen. I need you to do this, please.”
He lets me swipe the swab around his mouth and I hand it over, watching as the man bags it in a plastic bag.
“Now a snip of hair from you both.”
Cameron rolls his lips as he watches the floor. I watch as the technician snips a piece of hair and then pulls out a few strands and places it in the bag. He then moves on and does the same to Owen as he fiddles with his truck.
Cameron inhales deeply as he watches the man. “How accurate is this testing?” he asks.
“If it’s over a 95% match it is classed as a positive match. If it is over a 80%match it is a family match, but not necessarily a positive match to this member of that family and further testing will be required.”
I nod as nerves begin to flutter deep inside my stomach.
“Is there a chance that this is another family member’s child?” the man asks.
“No,” Cameron snaps, annoyed at the insinuation, and I shake my head immediately.
“It’s a positive match,” I whisper and Cameron frowns as he watches Owen.
“Alright then. It’s all finished. You’ll receive an email in approximately three hours from now.”
Cameron stands immediately and I clutch Owen tight in my arms as I look up at him. He glances down. “Goodbye, Owen,” he pushes out.
“Bye.” Owen smiles happily.
He nods my way and leaves the room in a rush. My eyes tear up. He can’t even look at me, so I glance back at the technician. He smiles sympathetically, knowing exactly what’s going on here. “These situations are never easy.”
I nod and kiss Owen’s forehead. “No,” I murmur sadly.
“Time makes a difference.”
I nod again and stand, placing Owen down on the floor. “Thank you for coming in late for this.” I smile.
He shakes my hand and smiles kindly. “Best of luck.”
Cameron
Joshua fills my glass with Scotch and ice, and then goes on to fill Adrian’s and his own. We’re sitting around my desk in my office. I don’t care for them to be here, but Murph made Joshua come in from Willowvale to wait for the results.
“It’s negative. I know it’s negative,” I murmur, almost to myself.
“It’s positive,” Adrian replies. “She wouldn’t have lied about this.”
Joshua looks at Adrian, deadpan. “At what point did you miss part of this conversation, idiot? Cam knew nothing about this.”
“Not telling is not the same as lying,” Adrian says calmly.
“Bull-fucking-shit,” I snap.
“Agreed,” Joshua adds. “I’m with Cam.”
I refresh my email again. Still nothing. “What’s taking so long?” I snap. “It’s been four hours.”
The email pings and I close my eyes. This is it. My nerves hit an all-time high.
I open the email.
Subject: Results
From: Testing
To: Cameron Stanton
DNA Match results. 99.9% match.
POSITIVE match result.
Owen Jack Tucker is the biological child of Cameron Stanton.
I close my eyes in physical pain.
The room falls silent as we all process the information.
Tears threaten to fall and the lump in my throat hurts. This isn’t how I wanted to become a father. I’m supposed to fall in love, have a wedding and a wife that I love and go through trying to conceive and then the pregnancy… the birth. I’m supposed to know my own child.
Suddenly, what I’ve missed out on becomes unbearable
I stand without saying anything and head to my bedroom, closing the door behind me.
I need to be alone.
Ashley
I walk into Club Exotic just before my shift at ten. This is the longest day in history. I’ve checked my phone every ten minutes since the results came through last night. Cameron hasn’t called. I didn’t see him at all today because he was in his office with appointments. I don’t know what I’m expecting, but it was more than this.
Does he even accept the test results?
This is the last place on Earth I want to be.
“Vivienne,” my friend the bouncer calls. “Where have you been? They told me you left?”
I smile, grateful to see a familiar, friendly face. “Hey.” I roll my eyes. “I wish I left, but I need the damn money.” I sigh.
He frowns. “You okay? You seem on edge.”
I slam my handbag down on the bar. “I’ve had the worst week of my life.”
“What happened?”
“I found the father of my kid and told him he was his, and he’s now my boss and he hates me… and I’m totally, totally fucked,” I blurt out in a rush.
His face falls. “Hell. That’s hectic.”
“I know, right?” I smirk.
“You want me to make you a drink?”
I glance over to the bar. It’s a long shift and I do need to unwind. “Yes, please. Actually, make it a double.”
He smiles brightly. “Coming right up, babe.”
“I’m going to put my stuff out the back. Do you know where I am tonight?”
“I think on the door for a bit and then maybe dancing.”
“What?” I snap as I screw up my face. “I don’t dance, she knows this.” I pick my bag up and throw it over my shoulder. “I swear to God, I do not need this shit job.” I growl.
He laughs. “How about I make you a triple?”
I nod. “How about it.” I walk toward the backroom. “And keep them coming.”
An hour later, I’m greeting men at the door and I’m on my fourth drink. These things are like rocket fuel and I need to stop soon if I plan to drive in eight hours.
“Hello, welcome to Club Exotic.” I smile as the men all start to file in. It’s a busy night and I can hardly keep up with the large groups of men arriving.
The sexy music starts and another girl comes to the doors to greet along with me.
“Why is it so busy?” I call over the music.
“God, I don’t know. Everyone’s horny tonight,” he replies dryly.
My little friend arrives with another two drinks for us and I shake my head. “No more. I’m seriously getting drunk here.”
“But your relaxed, right?” He laughs loudly.
I giggle. “Yes, I do have to admit that I’m relaxed for the first time in a long time.”
He winks. “My job here is done.”
He disappears down to the Escape girls, and Stephanie walks over to us. “Vivienne, I’m going to need you picking up glasses.”
“Sure.” I smile. My favorite job.
“You’re going to have to wear a dancing uniform, though.”
“What?” I ask.
She shrugs. “We don’t have enough staff on to cover all these men. If they see more of us around, they’re less likely to throw a tantrum.”
I glance around at the other girls in their sheer tops and their little hotpants.
“I’m going to get the girls behind the bar to change as well. It just makes it look better if they think there are a lot of dancers on,” she adds.
“I’m not changing.”
“You can go and tell Eliza in the office then because she’s the one who told me to tell you.”
I blow out a breath and roll my eyes. “Fine!” I snap. I swear to God, I’m looking for another job tomorrow.
I storm out the back and change into a skimpy pair of hot pants and remove my leather top, throwing on an organza short top in its place.
I turn and check myself out in the mirror and smirk. I do look better in this uniform, to be honest. My bouncer friend comes out with another two drinks and my eyes nearly pop from their sockets.
“You’re going to have to drive me home.” I laugh.
He smiles cheekily. “Deal.”
I pick up one of my drinks and put it onto my tray and begin to walk around picking up glasses from the club. The music is loud and the women are sexy. With the warmth of the alcohol in my blood, I start to smile as I walk around and get on with my job.
I do like it here.
I bend to pick up a glass from a table, but when I glance up, I freeze on the spot.
Cameron is standing with a large group of men, a drink and cigar in each hand, laughing loudly and having fun.
I stand up as the room begins to spin around me.
He’s in the Escape Lounge, roped off section. Holy shit… and he thinks I left.
I walk back out the back and throw down my sixth drink as my fury begins to rise.
Who the hell does he think he is? He demands I leave this job, yet he’s here to fuck someone else just four days after he left me.
I’m here broken hearted and he’s here to orgasm with some random stranger.
I’ve never been so furious in my life. I storm back out into the club and I feel a hand on my behind. “Hey, Vivienne.”
I slap the hand off my ass and turn like the devil has touched me. “Don’t fucking touch me.” I growl.
“Hey, what’s with you tonight, hell cat?”
It’s the dipshit that tried to tip me the night in the Escape Lounge. “Don’t touch me,” I snap.
“I’ll do more than touch you. I’m going to fuck you hard.” He grabs my hand and tries to pull me down to the Escape Lounge.
I rip my arm from his clutches. “Get your hands off me, asshole!” I snap.
He leans in and tries to bite me, and I slap him hard across the face. He staggers back. I push him hard in the chest. “I wouldn’t have sex with you if you were the last man on this Earth,” I yell.
He lifts his chin in defiance. “Is that so.” He growls.
The bouncers arrive and pull him off me. I weave through the crowd to escape as my heart churns adrenaline through my body at double speed. Shit, I hate that guy.
I pick up my tray and turn just in time to see Cameron take a seat in the lap-dancing bay on a leather couch. He sits back in his expensive suit, drinking his blue label Scotch, waiting for a half-naked girl to rub her body up against his.
Spoiled fucking brat that he is.
Something snaps deep inside. I put my tray down on the nearest table and walk over to stand behind him. I swear to God, I could become Jack the ripper and cut his throat if I had the chance. The song Yeah by Usher comes on, and I don’t know if it’s the alcohol, the adrenaline, or the sheer bad luck from seeing him, but he’s going to pay for hurting me.
I slowly walk around, kneel in front of him, and our eyes lock. His jaw clenches in anger, yet his dark eyes blaze with arousal. He licks his bottom lip and I feel my insides clench.
For five minutes, he’s mine and he’s going pay for the week he’s put me through. I climb up onto is lap and spread my legs over his body, then I lean in and take his ear between my teeth and I bite down hard. He inhales sharply.
His cock hardens instantly underneath me. I reach down and grab it through his suit pants.
Rock hard and ready to fuck.
His jaw clenches again and I bend down to rub my breasts all over his face as I grab his hands and place them on my ass. He grabs me hard as I move my hips to the sexy beat.
“Fucking hell,” he whispers.
I circle my hips and he grabs me, slamming me down onto his cock. I moan and arch my back, and his mouth drops open as he watches me lean back as though I’m coming. His two hands slide underneath my top and he cups my breasts in his hand, lifting my top to take my nipple in his mouth.
I watch him as my sex begins to throb. I need him. I need to fuck him.
I begin to writhe uncontrollably, and he begins to lift his hips to grind me harder.
“Kiss me.” He growls.
I bend down, and as my hair tickles our faces, my tongue slides up against his.
He moans into my mouth and our kiss turns frantic, his hands grabbing my behind with bruising force.
He’s going to come.
No.
I break the kiss and stand immediately, smiling sarcastically as I wipe the hair back from my perspiring face.
“Blow your load on someone else, asshole.” I sneer.
He snaps suddenly and stands to grab me by the arm. He drags me outside, and next thing I know, he is pulling me across the road to his car.
“Get in the car,” he yells. “I told you to leave this fucking place!”
“And you told me you were cancelling your membership.”
“Ashley, get in the fucking car.”
“No! You don’t get to tell me what to do!”
“The hell I don’t,” he yells. “You are the mother of my child. You will do what I fucking say.”
The bouncers come out and run across the road to help me. “Vivienne, come back inside,” one of them calls.
“Get in the fucking car, Ashley, or I swear to God.”
My eyes flicker between the bouncers and Cameron, and I know that if I do what he says now, I will always end up doing what he tells me….and he will treat me like dirt forever.
This is a power play… and Cameron Stanton just lost.
I turn and walk back in the direction of the club.
“Ashley,” he yells.
I turn and give him the bird, and he turns and punches the windshield of his Aston Martin. It crackles as it smashes into a spider web of broken glass art.
I walk through the doors of the club with my adrenaline at an all time high.
Holy fuck.
What just happened?