10
“C-Cameron.” I stammer.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” He growls.
I step back, shocked at his venom. “I’m working.” I glance around nervously.
“You work in a brothel?” he yells.
“Is everything okay here?” My boss Eliza interrupts.
Oh no. I’ve hardly seen her out on the floor since I started and she chooses now to show up. She glances between the two of us in question.
Cameron regains his composure. “I was just asking Vivienne to give me a lap dance.” He fakes a smile.
My mouth drops open in horror. What the hell is he doing?
Eliza smiles warmly. “I’m sorry, Vivienne doesn’t work in that part of the club, although I’m trying to persuade her.” She puts her arm around me affectionately.
Cameron narrows his eyes at me in contempt.
“I just work at the bar…” I interrupt.
“I can get someone else to give you a lap dance, sir?” Eliza smiles warmly.
Cameron’s eyes meet mine. “Yeah. That would be fantastic.”
I glare at him.
“I’ll make sure you are well looked after tonight, sir.” Eliza smiles. “Take a seat down in chair two and I will have one of our best girls on your lap in just a moment.”
His eyes hold mine for a moment before he smirks and disappears down the stairs.
My anger starts to boil. So he expects me to watch him get a lap dance from another woman?
Like hell.
“I will do his lap dance, Eliza.”
She frowns. “Are you sure?”
“Yep.”
“Do you know what to do?”
“Yes, I sat in on Ebony’s class the other night before my shift.” Thankfully Ebony teaches lap dancing classes once a month for the new girls, and I just happened to arrive early.
She smiles and grabs my hand in hers. “You’re going to love it. I can’t tell you how excited I am for you.” She glances down at me. “You will have to go and get the correct uniform on.”
I nod. “Okay.” I turn my attention back to Cameron as I watch him down on the level below, talking to a girl as she gets his drink. He listens attentively to something she says and then he smiles sexily before he falls into the large, leather chair and makes himself comfortable as he waits for his private dance.
Asshole.
I’m raging mad. I couldn’t see him tonight, so he comes here to fuck an Escape girl on the sly.
Oh, he’s something else.
He may not survive this. He may bleed to death when I bite off his dick mid dance.
I march to the dressing room where the assistant is folding clothes.
“I need a lap dancing uniform,” I snap.
She frowns.
“Please,” I add. Oh hell, this isn’t her fault. What’s wrong with me? “Sorry for being rude.”
She is in her fifties and kind looking, curvy, with a perfect silver bob hairstyle. She’s also very well dressed. “Are you okay, dear?” she asks.
I nod as I try to calm my anger. “Yes…” I pause. “I’m just having a really shitty night, you know?”
She smiles. “Oh, I know.”
I smile back. She’s nice.
“What size are you?”
I look up to the clothes hanging perfectly on the rack and I blow out a breath. “I don’t know.”
“Undress and put this on.” She hands me the cream, sheer, small organza top, and I stare down at it.
“I don’t think I can do this…” I sigh.
“Sure you can.” She hands me a pair of skimpy leather shorts and I glance around, looking for a change room.
“Just dress here darling, I’ve seen it all.”
Oh man. Okay. I slide my leather skirt down my legs and stand before her in my lace panties before I slide the short hot pants up and into place. I turn and glance at my behind in the mirror. “Oh jeez. These are skimpy.”
“That’s the plan, love.” She laughs. “Take your top off.”
I close my eyes. I can’t believe I’m taking my clothes off in front of this woman. I glance around nervously and slide my leather, lace up top off over my shoulders. I stand before her, topless and vulnerable. No other woman has ever seen my boobs before. Not even my mom, I don’t think.
She smiles. “You are lovely and have nothing to be ashamed of.” She hands the top to me and I take it, sliding it on. It’s so short that the bottom of my breasts are peeking out from underneath it. She straightens my wig and passes me a lip-gloss. I turn to the mirror and reapply.
I blow out a breath.
“Any man would be lucky to lay eyes on you in that,” She says softly.
I smirk.
“Go out there and show him what he can’t have.”
I grin. I needed to hear that. “Wish me luck.”
“Good luck.”
I walk out the door and into the alcove where three bouncers wait. My friend Matt is there and he turns to face me. “Hey.” He smiles as his eyes scan my scantily dressed body. “Look at you.”
I cringe. “Oh God. Do I look okay?” I whisper.
“You look fucking hot.”
I smile, grateful.
“You dancing tonight, babe?” he asks.
I nod. “Just one.”
“Let’s go.” He gestures to the door.
“Huh?” I frown.
“I will come with you. You won’t be anywhere alone out there.”
“Oh.” My eyes widen in horror. Oh no, he can’t watch me. I’ll get stage fright.
“Matt, can you do me a favor?”
“What’s that?”
“Can you just watch me from over near the wall. I won’t be able to do it if I see you right there.”
He smiles and nods before we walk out into the club. The lights are dimmed, and scantily dressed girls weave between the mass of powerful men. The mood in the room is sexy. It’s forbidden desire at its best. How many of these men are married, here to quench their thirst for new flesh?
I look over and I see Cameron. Wearing his expensive suit, he is seated in the large, leather chair, drink in his hand as he waits for his own pound of flesh. His dark hair is wavy on top and he has a growth shadow over his square jaw.
I slowly walk over to stand in front of him. His eyes rise to meet mine and a sexy smile crosses his face.
He won.
“You wanted a lap dance, sir?”
He sits back and readjusts the obvious erection in his pants.
Fuck, he’s hot.
“I did,” he replies as his eyes hold mine and he slowly sips his drink.
I walk toward him and slowly drop to my knees between his legs, he inhales sharply.
“Your wish is my command,” I whisper.
His eyes are locked on mine and his jaw hangs slack. Electricity zaps between us.
“What do you want?” I breathe as my tongue darts out to lick my bottom lip.
His hungry eyes watch me. “You,” he whispers. “I want you.”
The music starts. Rude boy from Rihanna and I smirk. This song is very fitting.
Come here rude boy, boy,
Can you get it up?
Come here rude boy, boy,
Is you big enough?
Take it, take it.
Baby, baby.
I seductively slide my hands up his shins and rest them on his inner thighs to push his legs apart and pull him forward in his chair. He inhales sharply and places his drink down on the side table. His eyes never leave mine. I drop my head between his legs and blow hot air through his pants, onto his thigh. I hear him moan softly and I nip his thigh with my teeth. His hands instinctively go to the back of my head, and he holds me tenderly between his palms. My eyes close in pleasure.
This man…
I move my ass in time to the beat as I focus my attention on his hard cock, placing my mouth over it. His hand tightens on the back of my head.
“Jesus Christ,” he whispers.
I look up at him and smirk from my position between his legs. “My name is Ashley,” I whisper.
His eyes hold mine. His face falls as something changes between us. He brings his hand up and tenderly cups my cheek, and I turn my head to kiss the palm of his hand. Dear God.
What is this? What is this feeling between us?
I remember where I am and continue to move to the beat as I climb onto his lap. My knees rest on either side of his legs, my body only inches above his crotch. I lean closer so that my breasts are only inches away from his mouth, and arch my back.
“Fuck.” He growls as he reaches up and grabs my hips to slam me down onto his hard cock.
My head rolls back in pleasure and Matt suddenly appears out of nowhere. “Hands off,” he orders Cameron.
I put my hand up in a stop signal. “Go away, Matt,” I snap. I need Cameron to touch me.
Hell, I really need him to touch me.
Matt backs off to his corner and my attention goes back to the hard man beneath me. With his hands planted firmly on my hips, he drags me over his hard cock, and my body shudders in approval.
His eyes flicker with a dangerous level of arousal, and it’s all I can do not to slide my shorts to the side and mount him.
Fuck… I need this. He sways my hips and grinds me onto his hard body. His mouth opens and he takes my nipple between his teeth and bites down.
I shudder as an orgasm teeters dangerously close.
Holy fucking hell.
“Ride me,” he whispers. “Ride my cock.”
I circle my hips and begin to rock back and forth, round and round, and he grips my hips with a bruising strength.
His eyes search mine. “Kiss me,” he breathes.
I can’t help it. I know I’m not supposed to do this. Hell, he isn’t even allowed to touch me, but those are rules that I have no chance of obeying when I’m on top of him.
“Cameron,” I breathe as he rocks me back and forth. Holy fuck… I’m going to come.
His lips take mine, aggressively, passionately.
Perfectly.
His eyes are closed, his cock is hard, and this is the most amazing thing I have ever experienced. We lose control and our kiss turns desperate as he grinds me harder and harder and hell... I can’t hold it. I shudder as an orgasm rips through me. Satisfaction flashes across his face, but it’s short lived as he pulls me down with pressure and I feel the telling jerk of his cock. His breath catches as his orgasm steals his ability to speak. We kiss and we pant until, finally, I can’t ignore where we are any longer. As my orgasm fog lifts, I look up to see I am in a club… and he is just another client. As if having the same epiphany as me, he pushes me off his lap and stands abruptly. His haunted eyes hold mine for an extended moment and then he strides toward the door. Oh God.
I hold my hand up to Matt, asking him to give me five minutes before I take off after Cameron. I catch him as he reaches his car in the parking lot, his back to me.
“Cameron.”
He turns. “Go back inside,” he growls.
“Cameron…”
“Get away from me, Ashley, before I fucking lose my shit with you.”
“Don’t be angry with me,” I plead.
“Don’t be angry with you!” he yells, outraged. “I have thought of nothing else but you all week, and then I find you here practically naked for other men after lying to me about where you’re supposed to be!”
“If you have thought of nothing else but me for the week, why are you here, Cameron?” I cry. “Are you here to have sex with somebody else while you think of me? Is that it? Is that how your fucked up, high flying world works?”
He narrows his eyes in contempt.
“You don’t know what it’s like to struggle,” I cry.
“So you work in a brothel?” he yells.
My face falls in disappointment and my tears break free. I swipe them away angrily. “Don’t you dare judge me! I don’t have a castle and a two-hundred-thousand-dollar car like you. I can’t even pay my fucking phone bill this week, Cameron.”
His nostrils flare in anger and he points to his Aston Martin. “Get in the car.”
I frown. “What?” I glance back at the door across the road. “I can’t just leave, I’m in the middle of a shift.” I can’t leave. We’ve only kissed twice, and he may not even be around next week, and I will have no job.
“So help me God, if you don’t get in the fucking car…” he yells so loud that they could probably hear it in the next suburb.
“I will lose my job.”
“You will lose me if you don’t,” he yells.
“Cameron. Please…”
“Last chance.”
“Cameron,” I plead.
With one last look, he gets into his car and starts the engine. I step back as he revs the shit out of it before he tears off down the road.
I stand in the darkness, listening to his tires screeching in the distance.
“You alright, Ash?” Matt voice calls from across the road.
I nod and drop my head as I let the disappointment sink in. Matt walks across the road and stands next to me silently, staring up the road where Cameron has disappeared.
“Was that your boyfriend?” he asks quietly.
I shake my head. “No.”
“Then why was he losing his shit?”
“It’s… complicated.”
“Want to go back inside?”
I blow out a deep breath. “Yeah, I guess.” I frown. “Matt, have you ever had the feeling that you may have just made the biggest mistake of your life?”
He smiles sarcastically. “Every hour, on the hour.”
Timing can make you or break you, and tonight I learned just how true that statement is.
It’s 4am when I slowly pull into my driveway. That was the longest shift in history. I had to stop myself from walking out at least ten times. Why did he have to come tonight, and why couldn’t he have handled it better?
Fuck. I’m so full of regrets right now, I can hardly see straight.
I hate that I need this crappy job, and my mind is weighing heavily on Cameron Stanton. I know I did the right thing by not leaving with him, but it doesn’t make me feel any better about it. The cold, hard truth is… he was there. He was there when he said he had been thinking about me all week, and after we made out yesterday. I know that, even if we did have any chance of working out, a long-term future with him is not on the cards. My first instinct was right. Once a player, always a player. He never lost his fucking phone in Vegas all those years ago and he probably slept with someone he picked up in the casino the very next night. Who was I kidding? I frown as I see the lights in our house are all on. What’s happening? Why is everything lit up? I quickly climb out of the car and head to the front door, but it opens before I put my key in. It’s Jenna. She’s been crying.
My face falls. “What’s wrong?”
She screws up her face. “Mom’s had a heart attack.”
“What? Oh, Jenna.”
She nods, unable to speak through her tears. I wrap her in my arms and hold her as she sobs. “Where is she?” I ask.
“At the hospital.”
“You need to go to her.”
She nods as she wipes her nose with a tissue. “Is that alright?”
“Of course it’s alright.”
“What will you do with Owie?” she whispers.
“It doesn’t matter. I’ll work something out.” I lead her into the kitchen, put the kettle on, and sit her at the table.
“What if she dies?” Jenna whispers.
I take her hand in mine and watch her for a minute. “Everything is going to be okay. Heart attacks aren’t always as bad as they sound.”
She puts her head into her hands and really starts to cry. What can I do to help her? I grab my laptop and go online in search of an airline ticket for her to fly home to Iowa. “There’s one here for tomorrow at ten in the morning. Will that be okay? That’s in about five hours from now.”
She shrugs.
“Let me check the other airlines to see if I can get one cheaper.” I continue to search, but eventually end up going back to the first flight I found.
Jenna finally falls into an exhausted sleep on the sofa, and I sit quietly at the
kitchen table as I try to work out what to do with the disaster that is my life.
I’ve lost Cameron, even though I never had him to begin with.
I now have no babysitter, which means I can’t work, which means I may now lose my internship.
The house is silent and dark, just like my options. I know I got myself into this life, but hell, it doesn’t make it any easier to cope with. It’s 6am and I plan to wait up to call work in an hour to tell them I won’t be in. I guess the worst thing of all is that it looks to Cameron that I am not going into work because of my fight with him last night. This timing sucks so badly.
What the hell am I going to say?
Oh, I can’t come in because I have no babysitter for a child that doesn’t exist. Or how about I can’t come in because I gave my boss a lap dance last night when I told him I was seeing my mother after we dry humped on his washing machine. Or maybe I made my boss blow in his pants last night and I refuse to pay for the dry cleaning bill.
I put my head into my hands. This is a fucking disaster.
“Hey.” Jenna smiles from the door.
I smile back. “There she is.” I stand and wrap her in my arms. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m okay. Thank you for last night.”
“We should go and get you packed.”
She nods. “Did you ring your mom?”
I shake my head. “No.”
“Why not?”
I shrug. “It’s all a bit too hard. I’ll have a couple of days off and then work something out from there.”
She watches me for a moment. “Why don’t you just ring your mom and offer to fly her out here for a week or two. I’m sure I will be back by then.”
I exhale slowly. I want to tell Jenna about Cameron and our fight, but now is not the time.
“Maybe.” I sigh.
“She won’t mind, and she can stay in my room.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
She watches me for a moment. “You okay?”
I smile sadly. “Yes. Of course. I’m just really tired.” I grab her hand in mine and squeeze it. “You should go pack. Owie and I will take you to the airport.”
She smiles, nods, and disappears up the stairs. I pick up the phone and stare at it for a moment. I love my mom with all of my heart. I love my mom, but things are a little strained between us—because of me, not her.
I guess I never got over the disappointment I saw in her eyes when I fell pregnant out of wedlock. She didn’t want me to have the baby and, although she has been amazing since Owen was born, it was like a fire in my belly was lit and I vowed to never rely on her for anything.
I especially don’t want to now.
I put the phone back down onto the kitchen table and head up to shower as I run over my options in my head. I’m so tired that the tears are just running out of my eyes as the hot water runs over my head. I keep seeing Cameron’s beautiful eyes looking up at me as I sat on his lap. The regret runs deep through my soul.
What could we have been if our timing had been different?
If we had met up after that weekend in Vegas five years ago, things could have been so different between us. I put my head in my hands as the tears flow. I need them to stop. I’m a mother now. With that, I lost the right for any romantic notions I ever had for myself.
But I can’t help it.
I feel it. I feel that pull towards him, and I so badly wanted to see where it could go.
I allow myself to cry for ten minutes and then I pick myself up and dust myself off.
That’s it now. Get on with it. I wipe my eyes and mentally prepare myself to toughen up. I need to stop with this sappy shit.
He’s gone.
I shower, dry, dress, and then go downstairs and dial Mom’s number. She answers on the first ring.
“Hello, Ash. What’s wrong?”
I smile and roll my eyes. “Hi, Mom.”
“Is Owie okay?”
“Yes, Owie is fine,” I reply. “Sorry to ring you so early.”
“Oh gosh, Ash, you scared me. I never hear from you at this hour.”
“I know, I’m sorry. Jenna’s mom had a heart attack.”
“Oh no.” She gasps. “Is she okay?”
I nod. “Hopefully.” I shrug. “They are doing more testing to today.”
“Is Jenna going home?”
“Yeah.” I hesitate, this is the part I hate—the asking for help bit.
“What are you going to do with Owie while you work Ash?” she asks.
“I’m kind of stuck, Mom.”
“Oh—”
I cut her off. “I was wondering, if I bought you an airline ticket, would you be able to come over here for a week or two and help me out with Owen?”
“Of course, love.”
I smile. “Really?”
“Of course I can. I would love to get to spend some time with the both of you.”
I close my eyes as they fill with tears again. “Thank you, Mom. It means so much.”
“I’m going to the doctors first thing this morning for my blood tests and then I will call you later and we can arrange flights.”
For the first time in ten hours I feel optimistic. “That’s great. Thanks, Mom. Love you.”
“I love you, too, Ash. Speak soon.”
At 7am sharp, I ring the hospital. I know Cameron does his hospital rounds at seven on the dot and that there is absolutely no chance at all that he will be the one to answer the phone.
“Hello, surgery,” the female voice answers. I frown as I try to remember the girl’s name. Shit, what is it?
“Hello, this is Ashley Tucker. I’m one of Dr. Stanton’s interns.”
“Yes, hello, Ashley,” the kind voice replies.
I scrunch up my face. I really don’t want to do this. “There’s been a family emergency and I won’t be in for a few days.”
“Oh dear. I hope everything is okay.”
I nod. “Me, too.” I pause for a moment. “Would you please be able to give Dr. Stanton a message for me?”
“Yes, of course.”
I think quickly. It’s Wednesday now, so if I fly Mom in on Thursday or Friday, I will be good to go again on Monday. “Can you just tell him that I had an emergency and I won’t be in until Monday?”
“Sure.”
“Can you please tell him that I will be taking the days without pay?”
“Ashley, that won’t be necessary. You’re entitled to sick days.”
“I’m not sick,” I reply. “I’m just unable to help it that’s all, but I want him to know that I am not sick.”
“Okay,” she answers. I know what she’s thinking: This chick is wacko.
“Just… tell him that I will definitely be in on Monday.”
“Okay. Good luck. I hope everything works out well.”
“Thank you.”
I let out a sigh of relief. I did it.
We’ve parked the car at the airport and are walking across the parking lot towards the terminal. Jenna and Owen are in front of me holding hands and I’m dragging the suitcase on wheels. “Look at that big plane, Owie,” I call from behind.
A plane takes off over us and we all stand still as we watch it zoom past.
“Awesome!” he yells, and we all laugh.
My phone rings. It’s Mom. “Hey.” I smile as I struggle with the heavy suitcase.
“Hello, love. We have a problem.”
I freeze. “We do?”
“My bloods came back, and remember how I stopped taking the blood thinners for the thrombosis I had last year?”
“Yes.” I frown.
“The doctor said I am unable to fly for a month.”
“What?” Shit.
“He said I can’t fly until I take another course and it will take a month until my blood is safe enough for me to travel.”
I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose. Fuck’s sake.
“But that’s okay. Why don’t you fly Owen here and he can stay with me for a week or two, and then you can fly back and get him?”
“Oh no. That’s okay. I’ve never been away from him before. I couldn’t do that.”
“Ashley, he will be fine.”
“No, Mom. It’s too long. We’ve never been apart for more than one night. Never mind, I will try and think of something else.”
Jenna has overheard our conversation and is standing watching me with a frown on her face. “What?” she mouths.
I shake my head. This is just my luck.
“Can I speak to Owen for a moment, please?” Mom asks.
“Sure.” I hand the phone to Owen. “Say hello to Grandma.”
He jumps excitedly on the spot and takes the phone from me. “Hello, Grandma.”
“What’s going on?” Jenna frowns.
“Mom can’t fly for a month because of her thrombosis.”
“Shit.”
“I know, bloody hell. She offered for me to fly him there, but that’s impossible.”
Jenna frowns. “Why?”
“I can’t be without him for that long.”
“He’ll be fine.”
“I won’t.”
“Like you have another choice. Do it.”
I shake my head. “Nope, not happening. I would rather lose my job than be without him. I can work it out.”
“It’s his grandmother. He will be safe.”
“I can’t do it.”
Owen holds the phone down. “I want to go to Grandma’s for a vacation.” He beams.
I look at him, deadpan. “We will go later. Give me the phone.”
He gets back on the phone. “I’m coming, Grandma. Mom said it’s okay,” he tells her excitedly, his eyes flickering to mine. “Yes, tomorrow.” He smiles cheekily and nods. “Yes, I will bring my swimming things.”
I roll my eyes and Jenna smiles. I snatch the phone from him. “Hi, Mom.”
“So I will see you tomorrow?” she asks hopefully.
“Mom, I love you, but no. Thanks for the offer, though.”
“Ashley.” She sighs.
“Bye.” I hang up.
Jenna puts her hands on her hips in disgust. “Ashley!”
“What?” I snap as I start to pull the heavy suitcase across the parking lot again.
“You don’t have a choice, Ash, and it will do the two of them good to spend some quality time together.”
I shake my head. “I can’t be away from him for two weeks, Jen. I would die not seeing him for that long.”
She smiles sadly and takes the suitcase from me. “Fine. We will work something else out then.”
Tears fill my eyes as I hold my little boy in my arms at the airport. It’s Friday morning and I am about to fly home to LA without him for the first time. After agonizing over it for a whole eight hours, I had to concede that I had no other choice but to fly Owen to my mom’s. Yesterday we made the trek here, and today I fly home without him. This is my worst nightmare.
“You be a good boy for mommy,” I whisper.
He smiles excitedly and I turn to Mom. “Please ring me the instant he needs anything.”
“I will.”
“I can be on the next flight.”
“I know, darling.”
I bend to Owen. “I will call you every morning and every night, and if you want to speak to me, you just tell Grandma and she will call me straight away.”
He smiles excitedly. He couldn’t care less. He’s just excited to be at Grandma’s.
“You better go, love.” Mom smiles.
I frown and bend to squeeze Owen in my arms. Maybe this isn’t a good idea. I don’t care about work. “Oh, I don’t know,” I whisper to Mom.
“Go,” she mouths. “We are fine.”
I nod, and through tear-filled eyes, I watch her lead my son away as he waves happily. I walk through security on autopilot and take a seat at the bar while I wait for my flight.
This is the worst week of all time. To save my job, I’ve had to leave the most important person in my life. What kind of a parent am I?
“What will it be?” The cute bartender asks.
“Can I have a vodka, lime, and soda, please?”
“Sure.”
My phone dances on the table and I pick it up. “Hello.”
“Hello, Ashley.”
I frown as I try to place the voice. “Hello.”
“This is Eliza from the club.”
My eyes widen. “Oh, h-hey,” I stammer. Shit, am I in trouble?
“Darling, I am just ringing because I have had a special request and I thought you may be interested.”
I frown. “Okay?”
“A gentleman has requested you for an Escape night.”
“Eliza, you know I don’t do that.”
“I know and I told him that, but he was very insistent.”
I shake my head. “I’m not interested, thank you.”
“He said to tell you that it was the man you gave the lap dance to the other night.”
Wait, what?
“Wait a minute.” I pause as my brain tries to catch up. “It was the man I was talking to when I saw you?” I ask.
“Yes.”
I stay silent.
“It’s very weird, actually, because he specifically asked me to tell you his name. Which I have never had before from a client.”
“What is it?” I whisper.
“His name is Cameron Stanton.”
“What does he want?”
“He wants a night with you… alone.”
My heart starts to race. “When?”
“Tonight.”