Sam
“I TAKE IT you told them.” Bryce’s unexpected voice was like a needle scratching a record. The happy, harmonious melody surrounding us was cut short by his untimely entrance.
“Hey! You’re here!” London retreated from my arms and ran to him. “Did you hear? Sam’s a match! How soon can we do this?”
He smiled at London’s enthusiasm and pulled her close, eyeing me the whole time like a lion protecting his cub. I didn’t want to break the eye contact because he didn’t intimidate me in the fucking least, but I had to glance over my shoulder to see if Ella was catching this.
Unfortunately, she was wiping her eyes with a tissue and missed the whole thing. I snapped my glare back on Bryce and swallowed my pride. No need to get into a pissing match now. Get things ironed out for Ella’s sake first, worry about this tool later.
“I made an appointment with your receptionist earlier. We meet at three to discuss the ins and outs of the procedure.”
“Oh! Should I be there?” London asked, looking up at Bryce and then at me.
“No, beautiful, that won’t be necessary.” He kissed the top of her head and narrowed his eyes as he addressed me. “In fact, I think we should reschedule.”
“Why?” I barked. What was the hold up? We had our answers. It was time to get the ball rolling.
“Because we still haven’t heard from Memphis, and if he’s a match he’ll be a better candidate.”
“But I’m standing right here and he’s not. Don’t you think it’s a waste of time to wait for him any longer?”
“Bryce, he’s right,” London chimed in. “Maybe we shouldn’t wait if we don’t have to.” She bypassed both of us and walked to her mother’s bedside. “What do you think, Mom? What do you want to do?”
Bryce stepped further into the room and shut the door. Before Ella could answer, he was adjusting the lapels of his white coat and clearing his throat. I was sure he was used to commanding people’s attention because of the get-up and his pretty boy good looks, but that shit didn’t matter to me. I only kept my mouth shut for the sake of the girls. I wanted to hear what he had to say as much as they did. This whole thing seemed like a ploy for London’s affection, but I wasn’t the one who went to medical school, so what did I know?
“There is a greater risk of rejection with an organ from a non-related donor. If Memphis is a match, the chances of Ella accepting the kidney and being completely out of the woods will increase exponentially.”
Fine and dandy, but we were skirting the reality of the situation. “But we don’t even know if he’s a match. I mean, the guy hasn’t answered any of London’s emails or phone calls. She doesn’t need that selfish prick’s kidney. She has mine.”
“Sam!” Ella gasped.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”
“Mom, he’s just being realistic,” London interrupted. “You know better than I do that Memphis isn’t the most reliable person. Who knows if he’d even agree to do it.”
Oh, I knew. He wouldn’t. He had his own shit going on right now. He was in no position to give up anything to anyone.
Ella closed her eyes and swallowed hard. I had to imagine it hurt to not have the support and concern of your own child. She didn’t deserve this. Ella was an amazing mother and Memphis was a thoughtless, messed up dick. If it were me in need of a transplant, I wouldn’t want his shitty kidney, even if he was the perfect match.
“Bryce, how long is too long to wait?” Ella broke the tension with a sensible question.
He walked closer, the heels of his Gucci or Armani or whichever-designer shoes clomping against the tile. “I know you’re tired of being here, but it’s the best place for you right now. I can assure you there is no need to panic and rush into anything just yet. If you want my professional opinion, I think we should wait a little while longer to hear from Memphis and then take it from there.”
I didn’t know if it was an outside-looking-in kind of thing, but it was as if Bryce was a hypnotist dangling a pocket watch in front of their eyes. Both London and Ella stared on with matching engrossed expressions, eating up everything he fed them. I guess society taught us to trust doctors, but my gut had taught me not to trust anyone—especially when jealousy was involved.
I approached Bryce. “Can I talk to you outside for a minute?” Ella and London spoke amongst themselves, lost in contemplation.
“Of course.”
He turned toward the door and I called behind me to the girls. “Excuse us for a second.”
I followed Bryce outside but directed us far enough away from Ella’s room that they wouldn’t overhear anything.
Bryce let out an annoyed huff as he came closer, digging his hands into his pockets.
“Why do you have such a hard-on for finding out whether Memphis is a match? You have me! I’m ready, willing, and able. Is there a fucking problem with that?”
Bryce’s nostrils flared but he remained composed as he answered me. “I already explained this to you inside. Why must I repeat myself?”
“Your professional opinion doesn’t apply in this situation, doc. You don’t know Memphis. I do. He’s selfish and flaky and in no position to help anyone. I can bet my other kidney he won’t pull through, and waiting for something to happen when I’m fucking positive it won’t is basically throwing precious time out the window.”
“She’s not dying anytime soon.” His answer was flippant and I didn’t like it.
I lunged forward and pressed a finger into his pompous chest. “But she is dying and I can stop that from happening, today!”
“Don’t fucking touch me.” His voice was a mere whisper as he looked around to make sure we had no witnesses. He flung my hand out of the way and bared his teeth like a rabid dog. “You think you know what’s best for her but you don’t. You think you can come back and sweep in and save the day. I’m the goddamn doctor here. I call the shots.”
“Huh.” I laughed. “I think you’re confusing things, pal. You’re Ella’s doctor, not London’s. Your main priority is what’s best for her. I got London covered.”
“The fuck you do,” he snarled.
I laughed again, my hands in the air, but I didn’t back down. He’d met his match. Even before the carnival, before I told London how I felt, I knew he sensed it. I knew he knew. I saw it in the way he watched me with her. The way his jaw tensed when I walked into a room, how his eyes narrowed whenever I was close to her. Maybe it was better that it was out in the open. This way there was no question what I expected at the end of this. Maybe it was best if I called him out and showed him it didn’t take a doctor to know shit.
Without thinking, I let the pain speak for me. The agony of missing her while I was gone, of not being with her all these years, of wanting her so fucking badly to be mine. “I knew this was about her! You couldn’t give a flying fuck about the rejection rate—that’s all a load of bullshit. You don’t want what’s best for Ella. You just don’t want this kidney coming from me because you know it’ll bring me and London closer and you’re scared—you’re fucking petrified she’ll choose me over you.”
“Choose you?” He laughed. “I wasn’t aware there was even a choice to make. That alone should tell you London’s not deciding between us because she’s actually with me. She was with me while you were gone, she’s been with me since you’ve been back, and she was with me all last night.”
My blood boiled at the thought of them together, of his hands on her, taking what was mine. All the more now that I knew his deal. He wasn’t an all right guy like I thought. He was an asshole and I wanted to wipe that satisfied smirk right off his smug face. But I knew if I attacked him here, on his turf, I’d be pinned as the bad guy.
“Well, then.” I straightened my gait and slid my hands into my pockets in an effort to control my fists from flying. “Let it be known. I’m not fucking going anywhere, Doc. London knows how I feel about her—that I love her. Right now she needs to focus on Ella—as you should—but soon she’ll realize what you’re really about and the choice will be crystal clear. She will choose me, because she loves me, too. End of story.”
He took a step forward and I braced myself for it. But Bryce wasn’t fighting with his fists. No, he sucker-punched me with his words. “That’s where you’re wrong, Goodwin, because our story has just begun. I asked her to move in with me this morning and she accepted. So, you’re right, the choice is crystal clear. She chose me.”
No fucking way. He had to be lying. This couldn’t be true. Not three days ago I asked her to move in with me and she shot me down faster than I could blink. Maybe I did have my wires crossed. Maybe I was delusional for thinking she loved me back. Maybe I was too late.
I wanted to march back into that hospital room and demand answers from her, but how could I do that? How could I cause a scene when this battle between Bryce and me wasn’t even a blip on London’s radar. She had bigger, more pressing things to deal with and I’d be damned if I made this harder on her.
Instead, I tucked my tail between my legs and decided to do the best thing for everyone involved. I’d get the fuck out of here—but not before telling Bryce how things would go down from here on out. “This isn’t over. The only reason I’m not putting up a fight is because I love that woman in there. I love her so fucking much I can put aside my own feelings, my pride, my jealousy, my goddamn sanity in order to not make this harder on her. But it’s not over and I will find out the truth. About this moving in shit, about the rejection rate nonsense, and about you, you prick!”
I didn’t bother to wait for a reaction, and I didn’t dare look back. Something wasn’t right and for some reason London was blind to all of it. I’d been a patient man my whole life. Years and years of keeping my feelings to myself trained me for that. It was also time to let this shit go for once and for all, but I wasn’t giving up without a fighting chance.