"Happy New Year's Eve. Enjoy your night," the oversized bouncer said, gesturing Allister and me into the packed club.
"Thanks," Allister said with a bright smile. I wasn't able to emit more than a pained grunt. She pushed me through the door, ignoring my withering look.
The Pioneer Square club had been transformed for the night. A gigantic net filled with gold, silver, and red balloons was suspended over the dance floor. Fog filtered through the gyrating mass of people. Flashing lights, timed to the loud music spun by the resident DJ, lit the faces of ecstatic people in the crowd.
It may have been New Year's Eve, but I had nothing to be happy about. Even though she looked great in her leather skirt and corset top, my boss was there as my date. My best friend wasn't speaking to me, and Erica had ignored my calls all week. I knew that I had fucked up, but how was I supposed to apologize if neither of them would speak to me? The only reason I knew that Damian had reserved a VIP table was because Janice had texted me.
Coming to the club to see Erica and Damian suddenly seemed like a huge mistake. Damian and I still hadn't cleared the air. The rift in our friendship had been tearing me up all week and I had no idea how or if I could fix it. My relationship with Erica, or lack thereof, just complicated matters. I might lose the two people who meant more to me than my own family.
"Stop glowering," Allister said as she scanned the crowd. "This is the first time I've gone out for New Year's since Finn was born. I plan on enjoying it."
"They're up there," I said, pointing to the second level, where I spotted Janice in a low-cut red dress. She was dancing in front of Damian, who lounged nearby, watching with half-lidded eyes.
When Damian noticed us walking their direction, he sat up and said something that left a grimace on Janice's face. The dread that had been wallowing in my gut all week knocked on my ribcage.
"Hi, guys," Janice said, bouncing over to greet us. "I'm so glad you could make it."
Janice's best friend Cassie and her boyfriend Talon looked up and waved in greeting. I introduced Allie to everyone while Damian glared a hole through me over the rim of his martini glass. When Allie sat beside Cassie and started chatting, I took the opportunity to search the crowd.
The glow of that sequin dress and Erica's auburn hair drew my gaze from all the way across the room. Holy shit, she looked good. Stunning. She was rocking a layered cut and her distinctive shade, again. Thank God.
Instead of sandals, she wore a pair of fuck-me heels that brought her up to eye level with the impeccably dressed guy who currently had his arm wrapped around her waist.
"Who the fuck is that with Erica?"
Janice stepped closer and followed my gaze. "That's her friend, Jake. He came in from New York a few days ago."
Mine, mine, mine.
It was as if Erica heard my thoughts, because she looked up and locked eyes with me from across the hazy room. When her smile fell, it was like a punch to the stomach. Jake leaned over and whispered something in her ear that made her laugh and then pulled her to the dance floor where the two started rubbing against one another in time with the music.
"Oh, hell, no," I muttered.
"Why the fuck do you care who she dances with?" Damian said with a snort. He had somehow sidled up next to Janice without me noticing.
"What is your problem?" I yelled over the loud music. Everyone at the table exchanged nervous glances.
"I'm going to go grab a drink," Talon told Cassie before sauntering towards the second-floor bar.
"Let's dance, Cassie. You care to join us, Allister?" Janice asked.
Allie eyed me with the perceptiveness of a good friend and an even better mother. Whatever she saw must have convinced her that I could protect myself from Damian's wrath. And possibly my own stupidity. She gave Janice a nod and before long the three were weaving through the crowd to join Erica who was still dancing with that douche bag.
Damian and I glared at each other for a few minutes, the heavy beat of the music pumping in time with the pounding in my head.
"Listen, I'm sorry, man," I said.
"About what exactly? The fact you fucked my little sister even though we had an understanding? Or the fact you discarded her like a piece of trash once you got what you wanted?"
I dragged a hand through my hair and sat down on one of the couches. "Is that what Erica told you?"
"She didn't have to. She's been locked in her room for days, only coming out when Janice and I make her."
The vision he painted with his words made me sick. I knew that I had hurt Erica. That was all I seemed capable of doing. But breaking her heart was not something I ever meant to do. "I can't change the past. All I can do is move forward and try to make it better. Why don't you tell me what's really bothering you about all of this?"
His lip curled up in a snarl before he threw back the rest of his martini, slamming the glass down on the table. "I don't trust you." His words hurt more than the blow to my face. "You don't have the best track record with women. You use them and lose them faster than a new pair of socks."
He was right, and I'd never cared before. But his comment stung. "I've been upfront about my intentions from the start."
"And what are your intentions?"
The million-dollar question I still didn't have an answer to. I'd thought I had made the right decision in Maui, but the last few weeks had been sheer torture. Spending Christmas with Erica had reinforced the fact that I had serious feelings for her that went beyond the physical.
Damian's eyes narrowed the longer it took me to respond. "You don't know, do you? Goddammit, this is my sister. You can't fuck with her emotions."
"I've never been dishonest with her," I said, hating how defensive I sounded.
"Erica deserves more than your honesty. She wants more, no matter what she says to the contrary. God knows why, but Erica always has when it comes to you."
"What's that supposed to mean? You don't think I'm good enough for your sister?"
"No, I don't." I shot out of my seat, ready to pummel my best friend, but his next words stopped me. "But nobody ever will be."
I slumped back down with a sigh. I'd never had a sister, but I could empathize.
"If there were anybody in this world I would entrust with my sister, it would be you. But you have to want it as much as she does. And I'm not sure you do."
I did want Erica. More than I wanted anything else. It had taken ten years to realize it, but it was staring me in the face brighter than the neon sign that said Happy New Year's above the bar.
"I do," I said, so softly I wasn't sure he'd heard me.
"Good," he said with a nod, a smile lighting up his face.
"Where does that leave us?" I asked.
"No matter what happens with you and Erica, you'll always be my best friend. That doesn't mean I won't hesitate to kick the shit out of you again." His smile grew, but I knew he was dead serious.
"That was a cheap shot, by the way." I rubbed my lip that still bore the mark of his anger.
"Not true. You didn't even try to stop me and I know how fast you are."
"Like I said before, I deserved it. Don't think I'll take it sitting still next time."
"There better not be a next time."