Chapter Six
Lana
“You hit me.” I can hear the disbelief in my own voice, even as my left cheek throbs with pain, my thoughts rebel against the idea.
Rex kicks out with his legs, determined and relentless. Mack steps back and my brother falls, but he recovers quickly, not unhurt though, he grabs for his thigh and he grimaces in pain.
“You ever lay a hand on her again and I promise you, a bullet wound will feel like child’s play,” Mackson’s voice drips with warning.
Corey steps up and tries to help him, but Rex pushes Corey off and sets his angry eyes on Mack, his lip curling in anger, but then he directs that hateful stare at me. “A steel knife in my heart, sis, that’s what you just did.”
“Right back at you, brother,” I say, my chin quivering and in the same moment I can’t hold back my tears any longer. I can’t breathe. Life as I know it is now over but I refuse to give in.
I wipe quickly at my face and watch as Rex flinches.
Finally, a sign, a piece of him is still in there.
“This ends now, Rex. We’re going home and I’m going to get you help, real help this time. I want my big brother back. I should’ve never let you get this bad…” I take a deep breath “…I promise, no more looking the other way.”
He’s obviously been using something behind my back. All this time I blamed grief when it was probably drugs.
“The Kings took another family member from me today,” he seethes. “I promise this is far from over.” Rex walks toward the exit and my heart pounds heavily against my chest. I’m going to lose my brother. I promised I’d fight harder, do better, I can’t let him leave without knowing the truth.
“It was Della.” The words are out before I take my next breath. The world around me turns from gray to color as I envision the future. One which shows me if what I’m about to do will be the right or wrong thing. Every bone in my body is demanding me to wage war, no matter the risks or costs. Isn’t that what you do for family? That’s what the Kings have done, they chose the path, which would protect their sister and by God I will choose the same for my brother.
Rex fights a distorted reality, one where his enemies see clearly. I can’t fail to show him who he’s becoming, and I won’t lose him to those who tell themselves they’re doing what’s right when they are the ones who have filled my brother’s mind with lies.
Rex stops dead. I knew he would. Any mention of her and he can’t help himself. He doesn’t look at me though, he stays silent staring at the ground.
“Lana,” Mack growls, but I don’t look away from my brother. I’m desperate for him to hear me.
“Della killed Jae, she told me herself only moments ago.” Mack curses into the air, but I don’t stop. “He raped her, Rex. He broke her, after everything she’d been through and she snapped.”
Rex turns to me, his eyes desperately hating the words I’m saying, but I know my brother, they’re getting through. “Lies, they convinced her to lie about being raped and now they’ve convinced her to lie about killing him.”
“No!” I move toward my brother and both Mack and Corey step forward to protect me. “I saw the pain on her face, the guilt in her voice, it’s destroyed a piece of her. She’s devastated at hurting us this way.” I straighten my shoulders and in a stern voice I say, “Rex.” When his eyes dart to mine and I know I have his full attention I continue, “I saw the truth in her eyes. She did it to survive and also out of fear. Slater went back after Della told him what happened. What you saw was Slater leaving after finding our father dead, seeing for himself what Della told him.”
“She didn’t,” Rex says repeatedly as his hands run through his short hair in quick succession, to the point he’s tightly gripping at the strands and ripping hair out.
The bathroom door opens and we see Pacer stick his head inside and then glances over his shoulder and says, “Slate.” In no time both are in the bathroom crowding Mackson and me, making sure we’re unharmed.
Slater turns to Rex, shoulders tense. “If you want to talk let’s go somewhere else.”
Rex turns, his eyes darting around the bathroom as if only now realizing Slater arrived.
“It was Della?” Rex chokes out, his words directed at Slater.
Slater’s head jerks back and then his accusing eyes are on me.
“Don’t look at my sister,” Rex roars, his nostrils flaring.
I jump and I sense everyone else in the room tense.
Slater drags his gaze from me to Rex. “No. It was me, you saw me leaving there, I’ve admitted it. Now let’s get on with this shit, but not here.”
Rex doesn’t budge as Slater tries to move him along.
“The knife, my father, blood was everywhere, yet I don’t think I saw any on you.” Rex growls in frustration and then punches himself in the head. “Fucking, remember.”
I gasp, my hand covering my mouth attempting to muffle my shock.
My brother looks to Corey and then to me, his mouth agape, eyes wide. “You lying to me, sis?”
“No.” Fear grips my throat, but I know I must go on, continue down this path, it’s what’s right. “I swear Rex, Della told me herself, they’re trying to protect her from you. I told them you’d never hurt her, but they love their sister.” The last part comes out in a whisper as a jealous pang hits the center of my chest.
Warmth lands on my arm, my head whips up to find Mack. His hand slides down my arm and he threads his fingers through mine, knowing I need the strength. I don’t pull away for that reason, as much as I wish I didn’t need anything from him, right now, I need to be held up.
Rex limps to a stall and rests against it. “Leave,” he says in a hoarse, penetrating tone.
Slater spins toward me, anger beyond any I’ve seen in his eyes that are firmly directed to me.
“Slater,” Mackson growls. “Don’t fucking look at her like that. None of this is her fault.”
“Argh!” Slater’s whole body tenses, his veins popping as he stares at the ceiling for what I’m not sure.
Corey takes a step out of the shadows and toward Rex. “Lana, come on, let’s get Rex out of here.”
I untangle my hand from Mack, he doesn’t resist, but he does grab my hand again and squeeze. My eyes find Mack’s, his are sad and appear resigned. He shakes his head, not for me to stay, it seems more like an apology.
“No one leaves,” Slater exclaims, his voice penetrating the small space.
Pacer moves to stand in front of the bathroom door.
Adrenaline spikes through my body. My eyes dart back to Mackson, looking for an answer, but all he gives me is his back. He places his hands on the basin and lowers his head as if he can’t bear to watch.
Slater cracks his knuckles. “Now we need assurances or things are about to get ugly.”
Assurances?
Rex stands up straight, his eyes piercing Slater’s. “I won’t come after Della or anyone else.” Rex grasps my arm and we walk to the door. “Now fucking move.”
Pacer doesn’t move an inch.
“I’m not worried about you. I never have been. You’re not the only one watching, Rex. We know you’ve been here every night since Della was admitted, paying a nurse for information on her condition.”
I narrow my eyes and glance over my shoulder to find Corey behind me, looking at me with a similar sadness Mack had moments ago.
Rex turns back around, “I get it. And if you know that, you know it will never come from my mouth.”
Slater shakes his head. “She needs to know, Rex. I can’t let you leave until she knows who not to talk to, because, clearly I can’t trust Lana with shit.”
I’m beyond pissed. I yank my arm away from Rex and step up. “Slater, clearly you’re angry with me and really I don’t give a damn, but don’t stand there and pretend that you actually believe I would go to the police about this.”
Slater’s lips tip up into a grin and I lose it.
“Don’t laugh at me,” I hiss.
Everyone in the room freezes and it’s Mack who finally lets me know the truth. “It’s not the police, Lana. It’s the mafia, your mother’s family. They don’t let murders go, ever. They ruthlessly, to the ends of the earth, find out who’s responsible for killing one of their family members and they end them, savagely.”
They’re worried over nothing. We’ve not spoken to our mother since she left us, and never had contact with her family. My father used to, but not me and Rex.
Over the years, my father has drunkenly explained to us about our mother’s mafia family. My dad was married in and he wanted to move back to his hometown, which was Parkland. My mother not so much, but she did what any good Sicilian woman would do, she came with her husband and made a home and popped out two children, but she became depressed, started drinking a lot and then one day she was just gone. I was three and Rex was five. I’ve seen pictures of her–Elena. Rex and I have her chocolate brown eyes.
However, my father couldn’t escape the Lucini’s so easily, he was still left with a debt. My mother’s family bought and funded the first five years of my father’s business. And in return, my father would on occasion, receive drugs and place them in certain ‘customer’s’ cars that came in for servicing. Rex and I have no idea how long this debt took to pay off or when it ended.
After my father’s death, I found his contacts book. I was tempted to locate my estranged family and find out if they knew where my mother was, but how could I ever forgive her? There was one letter from my mother to Rex. However, he threw it away, adamant we have nothing to do with them. So I dumped the book and never thought about it again.
“We don’t see our family or have anything to do with them, we never have.” My eyes search out Mack and I’m close to saying, ‘you know that’ when I catch myself. “And Rex and I wouldn’t ever wish that on Della. I doubt they even remember we’re alive, and I’m sure if Rex was going to reach out to them about my father’s death at all, he would’ve done it long before now.” I glance at Rex as I speak for him and see him staring the other way, seemingly unable to look at me. “Rex… tell them.” Rex doesn’t answer me. Instead, he turns back to Pacer.
“Move before I fucking move you myself.”
Stepping away from my brother I whisper, “Rex?” With his back to me, I watch as Rex’s head falls forward and he sighs. My sanity is at breaking point. Every damn step forward has been riddled with lies. My hands are shaking as I demand loudly, “Somebody tell me something.”
Mack’s the brave one who steps to me and with placating hands in the air, as if he’s trying to corner me or keep me from lashing out, he says, “Rex took over your dad’s work with the family when he died. He’s been working closely with the Lucini’s family ever since.”
I spin to my brother ready to ask him what Mack is talking about, but he’s still standing with his head bowed, looking defeated.
Glancing to Corey, he gives me the same sorrowful expression. He knew this was coming, so did Mackson. Time slows. The drugs. The weekends away. The secret phone calls I thought were girls.
“How was I this blind for so long?”
I rush Corey and grab his shirt, pushing him backward. “How could you let him do this? He’s in for life now, how did you not think to tell me. I’m his family, not you or the guys, me.”
Corey frowns.
Weak. I push him back, my face twisting with a snarl. “All these years I’ve worried and planned with you to help my brother, and all along you knew how bad he was getting on the drugs… and now he’s in the mafia?”
Suddenly memories flood through my mind. I gasp out, “Thomas.” A man in his late thirties, maybe early forties, always wears sunglasses, denim jeans, and a leather jacket. I saw him a few times a year, only when I turned up to the garage unannounced and he happened to be there at the same time. I asked Rex about him once, and he told me Thomas was a guy he’d hired to help him out in the garage when it got busy. I had replied saying he didn’t dress like a mechanic, and Rex laughed my comment off. I didn’t question it; the garage, the business was Rex’s territory. He was vehement that I find something I loved and pursue that and leave the garage to him.
“Thomas Cutillo… AKA Bone. An enforcer for the Sicilian Mafia,” Slater informs me.
“This is none of your business,” Rex sneers toward Slater. “Thomas knows nothing. He arrives and leaves on the same day, and has no idea about my war with you all. The Caporegime, Paulie, he asks questions now and again when I go to meetings, but I’ve never led him to Portland. I’m not a snitch and I can dish out my own payback.”
Rex finally speaks to me and his voice is emotionless. “I had a house and business to pay for, and not to mention I had to keep food on the table and you were in college. This isn’t Corey’s fault. There was a choice to be made and I made it… end of fucking story. My guys were told not to tell you, and they followed my orders. They’re my crew, not yours. Now, I’m leaving, with or without you, Lana.”
Rex’s jaw is ticking, his tight, tense body telling me to shut the hell up and go with him now. But his words feel like knives piercing my heart, they hurt me more than the searing slap across my face. I can’t leave yet. I’ve learned more in this crappy bathroom than I have in the past five years of my life. I need to find out one more thing.
“Since taking over, have you seen her? That letter. You told me you ignored it, you told me to let it go.”
Rex’s expression turns pained. He shakes his head and begs, “Not here.”
Betrayal of the worst kind surges through me, and it’s delivered by my own brother.
How could he talk to her after she abandoned us? He was able to spend time with her? Get to know her and never told me. My own brother didn’t try and connect his mother and sister in five years?
Emotions, so many are struggling for control. I’m trying to pick just one, but I can’t, my throat feels as if it’s being strangled.
I wanted the truth and that’s what I received.
“Leave,” I say to my brother in a soft broken voice.
“Lana,” Corey tries to approach.
This time, I shout at him and Rex, “Leave! ”
I swipe at my tears with the back of my shaking hands.
Rex rubs at his temples as if in pain and says, “Fine. But remember I came for you.”
You came to tell me your plan, not to save me.
“You don’t want to come home, fuck you then. Become a Kings’ whore, but know this, you aren’t welcome back home ever again.” My brother turns his back on me and walks out of the bathroom, never once glancing at me.
The door bangs closed and it’s as if the room shakes from underneath me and causes my knees to give out. I don’t hit hard ground. I’m caught around the middle and land softly against a warm chest. I have no idea who’s holding me and I don’t care. All I can feel is my chest ripping open, a central part of me I thought was destroyed a long time ago. How wrong I was. This is what a real broken heart feels like, an important part of your soul shattering beyond repair.