“I seriously have no idea what you’re talking about,” I lie. I glance at Barrett and notice he’s sporting a shit-eating grin, so I quickly look away.

“Oh really? You have no idea, huh?”

“Nope!”

“Uh huh. So, you have no input on why Christine is glowing these days? Even after you were a raging idiot and basically broke up with her.”

I roll my eyes but ignore the second part of his question. “Not a clue.”

“You’re so full of shit.”

“And you’re so damn nosy.”

“I don’t deny that. See how that works? I don’t deny truth… you don’t deny truth…”

“You’re such a pain in my ass.”

“Yet you still love me! Funny. I’m just that much of a likable guy.”

“What are we talking about in here?” Josh, says as he walks into his and Barrett’s joint office.

I groan, knowing that between the two of them, they won’t let up until I start divulging some information they think they’re privy to.

“Ah, just in time. Andy was just going to fill us in on why Christine is so happy and glowing these days. I mean, aside from the fact you pulled your head out of your ass and realized you were being a jackass.”

He just can’t let it go. “Thanks. I appreciate your kind words. And, no, I wasn’t about to say anything.”

“Oh you were? Oh goody. I mean, we have our theories, but we would definitely prefer if you just told us the truth. It’s really an inconvenience, us always having to talk about it behind your back and all.”

They’re both leaning back in their office chairs that face each other in their office, only separated by their desks. Barrett chuckles, and I roll my eyes. The thing is, though, I really need to talk to someone about what’s happening. Because if I don’t, I’m likely to lose my shit, and that’s kind of the purpose of our meeting. I was the one who requested it, after all. But that doesn’t mean I want to give in so quickly. Watching these two squirm is more fun.

“You are hopeless.”

“Full. Hope-full. There’s a difference. We’re hopeful that you finally just tell us that Christine’s pre…”

“Josh! Shut up, man! Let him tell us!”

I stand up from the chair I was sitting in and swipe my Dreamin’ Beans coffee cup off the table, making my way toward the door like I’m going to leave. Before I can make it three steps, they both spring out of their chairs and dart in my direction. Barrett puts his arm in front of the doorway like he’s going to block my exit. Josh moves to stand next to him.

“No. Please. Don’t leave!” Josh’s voice is frighteningly close to whining.

“Yeah — come on, Andy! We’ll be good. And we’re vaults. We promise. Anything you tell us we keep a secret.”

I raise an eyebrow at his blatant lie. They’re the worst secret keepers in the world. “Why do you think there’s anything to even tell you?”

They squint their eyes at me and I sigh, knowing I can’t just leave.

“Okay, fine!” I stomp over and sit down again.

They tap their fists against each other’s in triumph without taking their eyes off me and close the door before they settle back in their chairs, moving them away from their desks and in front of me, leaning over with their elbows on their knees.

Idiots.

“Christine… she might be…”

“Yeah? Yeah?” Josh says, leaning over farther.

“Well, for a couple months now she hasn’t really been feeling the best,” I admit.

“Is she going to be okay? How long do you suppose this strange illness will last?” Barrett asks, thinking he’s sneaky. Spoiler alert: he isn’t.

“I don’t know. I guess it’s different for everyone. Some people are sick for longer, some only a short period of time.”

“What could have possibly caused this bizarre illness?” This from Josh; he winks at Barrett.

“Is she still upset about your moronic behavior? Or was it something else you did?”

I almost roll my eyes at their ridiculousness. Instead, I shrug my shoulders and fain indifference. “Could be anything, really. But my best guess would be that it’s because she’s…” I stop and look around the room.

“Yeah?”

“She’s…”

Josh falls out of his chair, the wheels on the bottom spinning around. He quickly recovers, setting it back up and taking a seat as if nothing happened.

“Out with it, dammit!” Barrett hollers then presses his lips together tightly like he didn’t just have an outburst.

“She’s pregnant, all right?”

The two idiots high five each other without taking their eyes off me. I chuckle, shake my head, and lean up to high-five their now outstretched hands in my direction. Soon they’re pulling me out of my seat and wrapping me up in a Barrett and Josh sandwich. It should be awkward — with any other two people it probably would be. But with them, it’s just what you expect.

Barrett reaches into his desk and pulls out a bottle of whiskey and three shot glasses. Seems odd to me he had those at the ready, but whatever.

“Shots! To the new daddy!”

“Opa!” Josh shouts. I think he secretly wants to be European. He’s always trying out different accents and words, whether they’re British, Italian, or today’s choice, Greek. None of them really work, his British, Irish, and even Australian accents pretty much crossover, but he tries, nonetheless.

Barrett knocks back his shot without even flinching at Josh’s word. I chuckle but do the same. I feel the burn all the way down. How people can do shots without making faces is beyond me.

“You just happened to have that here?”

He shrugs. “I may have brought it in when we started suspecting. And when you asked for the meeting, I had to fight back bringing in cigars, too.”

“Did I miss it?” The door to their office swings open so hard it hits the wall, and James’s voice booms from the doorway. He notices our empty shot glasses and narrows his eyes at Barrett. “Dammit! I did, didn’t I? I told you to hold him off!”

“It’s okay, brother, better luck next time.” Barrett reaches into his drawer and pulls out a fourth shot glass, fills it to the brim, and slides it over to his brother-in-law. James tips it back then lifts his glass in my direction.

“So, is it true?”

“What’s that?” I ask him.

“Don’t play dumb with me, man. Is it true? Are we expecting a little bun in Christine’s oven?”

“We?”

All three men look at me like I’m dumb. “Of course, we!” Josh shouts like he’s offended, and the other two nod their heads in agreement.

“How is this a joint effort with you three assholes?”

“Umm, because we’re going to be the little squirt’s uncles. Duh,” Barrett says as though it’s obvious.

“I’m a little disappointed and hurt that you even had to ask that,” James says, shaking his head.

I pinch the bridge of my nose, praying this whole ordeal is going easier for Christine than it is for me.

“So, what’s the plan?” Barrett asks, pulling me out of my thoughts. What I thought would have been the worst day of my life, turned out to be the best.

“Plan?”

“Man, you’re so out of it. Of course, plan. What’s next?”

“What’s next is we’re having a baby. She’s freaked out, too. It’s not like she’s that young, you know?”

“She looks amazing though. And she’s already got that beautiful glow to her,” Josh says and I growl, causing him to howl in laughter.

“Whoa, man. Calm yourself. I’m a perfectly happy married man. Just stating a fact.”

“Fact or not, keep your eyes to yourself.”

James raises his eyebrows at me and smiles knowingly. His wife is gorgeous, too. Obviously, he knows it, but he isn’t so keen on anyone else knowing it.

“How’s she feeling about all this? What did the boys say? Bri?”

“Bri can’t wait. She’s a little nervous, of course. It’s not like Christine’s twenty-five, but she just wants her mom happy. The boys? They’re almost as excited as we are. They love Christine, want her to stick around. The boys looked a little more than shocked when we told them. It was a humbling experience, for sure. Obviously, we’ve talked about things, but them being aware that their dad had sex with someone he wasn’t married to… yet… was not a fun conversation to have. I think next week I’ll smash my fingers with a hammer and see if it’s as much fun.”

The guys all grin, and Barrett offers up an, “I’ll bet.”

“As for our plans? We’re together. We were before we found out, and I wasn’t planning to let her go. Until I lost my damn mind and blamed her for something she didn’t do, but I have her back and now I need to convince her to put my ring on her finger, take my last name, and life will be good.” I lean back in my chair, hands folded together on the back of my head.

“You’re planning to marry her?” Josh asks.

“That was always the plan. I think I knew it when we first started hanging out, after Heather. It was never awkward. It has always felt right between us.”

“Wow,” Barrett says, picking up his phone, which I yank away quickly.

“Stop it, you news-spreading girl!”

He raises his hands. “I wasn’t doing anything!” He tries to defend himself but we all know he wouldn’t have kept that one a secret.

James shakes his head laughing. “And he wonders why I had to just drop to one knee when he didn’t expect it.”

“I’m hoping to do it in a more romantic setting than immediately after seeing someone get arrested.” James proposed about two minutes after they watched Carly’s ex-husband, Vince, get arrested for assault against James, among other things.

“And I missed it, too. Still not something I’m over,” Barrett grumbles as he shoots daggers in James’s direction.

“Why would you need to be a part of it?”

“Tate and Will both saw it! Pardon me if I think it’s a whole bunch of crap that your gym owner got to see it and not me. Plus, Will got to be there for your first date!”

“He owns the shooting range we went to. It’s not like he was there for the date. And they were there because we were together when we got the call that Vince was at the house!”

“Whatever. Still a bunch of crap. Could have called me,” Barrett grumbles.

“Hello! I did. You just weren’t quick enough.”

Barrett simply narrows his eyes.

“You’re so nosy,” Josh says.

“Hi pot, I’m kettle. Look at that! We’re both black.”

“So…” James says, probably trying to get these two nutjobs back on track. “You’re planning to ask her to marry you? Things are okay between you two again? You squared that away? What do the boys think of that?”

“Any other questions, man?” I tease, but continue. “We’re good. I apologized for being an idiot. She showed me what it means to be an adult. The boys? Well, let’s just say they’re definitely on board the marriage train.”