Chapter Twenty-Five

Seth

It had been perfect. Being with Dante—in Dante—had driven the cloud of hate and self-doubt firmly away. Seth allowed himself to rest in Dante’s arms for a few moments longer, loving the ragged breaths that made his lover’s chest shudder and heave. He had made Dante come wholly undone and knowing that made him feel so happy.

“You need to let me go,” he said, once Dante’s breathing had calmed down. “To recharge,” he added hurriedly, in case Dante got the wrong impression.

“But I don’t want to,” Dante pouted.

Seth chuckled. “I don’t want you to, either. But you’ve held onto me for—” He shook his head. “I don’t know how long. Hours. Longer than last time. You must be exhausted.” He hooked his mouth up into the smile. “And I don’t mean from the sex.”

“The sex was exhausting in the best way,” Dante said, kissing Seth’s neck.

“Thank you for letting me fuck you,” Seth whispered. “And for holding onto me. For saving me. Again.”

He reached for his clothes, without losing contact with Dante. He still didn’t understand how his clothes remained solid and real while he was, even when they weren’t on him. Nor did he understand why they wouldn’t just return to him if Dante let him go. He doubted he ever would. It was all mystic bullshit, and there probably wasn’t any rule book, although having one would have been helpful.

“Just a little longer,” Dante said, pulling him back into an embrace. “I love having you in my arms.”

“Then you’re just going to have to wait until you’ve got your energy back.” Seth got dressed and then pulled away, instantly becoming incorporeal again.

“I like it when you take charge,” Dante purred. “It’s sexy.”

Seth did his best to fold his arms, without his mostly see-through limbs passing through one another. “You do, huh?”

Dante nodded, his eyelids heavy with desire.

Seth sat opposite him, hovering a few millimeters above the dusty floor. He watched as Dante settled back, arms stretched up, hands folded behind his head. He looked happy and content, as his loving stare settled on Seth.

“You said there was a way I could stay with you?” Seth asked, hoping he hadn’t imagined those words.

Dante nodded. “It’s possible you could ascend and become an angel.”

Seth’s eyes popped open wide. “Really? How?” It seemed impossible to him. How could he become something as majestic as Dante?

“You have to perform a task worthy of ascending.” Dante tilted his head a little. “A task that you deem worthy.” He paused, clearly thinking by the way his lips pursed and his brow furrowed. “I think it’s about your sense of self-worth.”

Seth dipped his gaze. That was likely to be a problem. He’d spent most of his life believing he wasn’t good enough. He hadn’t been good enough as a son, to stop his mom from taking drugs or overdosing. He hadn’t been a good enough neighbor to prevent the guy next door from being brutally murdered, nor had he gone to the cops and handed in the evidence that could have put the man’s killer away. He hadn’t been a good enough friend to those he’d slept next to on the streets, to stop them freezing to death over long, cold winters. Heck, he hadn’t even been a good enough photographer to land himself a permanent job. If he had have done, he would have had the money to help more people.

“Killian knows more,” Dante said.

“That’s why you went to speak to him?”

Dante nodded. “Yeah. Not that he was massively helpful. We should talk to him again. Together.”

“Talk to me?”

Seth swung round, slightly disorientated that he hadn’t needed to stand to do so; he’d just pivoted in the air. Killian was standing in the doorway, his arms loosely crossed. He licked his lips as his stare slowly drifted over Dante’s naked body, making Seth shiver with anger.

“Quit staring,” Dante snapped, before grabbing his clothes and pulling them on.

“You always used to like me staring at you,” Killian said. “After you’d fucked me.”

Seth knew he had no right to be jealous. He had no idea how old either angel was, but Dante had had a life long before he’d even existed. And that life would have included sex. But did it have to have been with Killian?

“I want you to help Seth transcend,” Dante said, his voice tight and his words clipped.

“And why should I do that?”

“Because he’s your charge now. It’s your job.”

Killian tutted and wagged his finger. “Actually no, it’s not. It’s my job to lead Seth to where his soul is destined to go and that most assuredly isn’t to transcendence.” Finally, he looked away from Dante to stare at Seth. His blue eyes were cold, his mouth crooked and his nose wrinkled, as though he’d stepped in dog shit. “You’re just not worthy. You’ve done nothing remarkable your whole life.”

Seth glared at him. “Dante just said it was about my own sense of self-worth, which means what you think of me doesn’t matter, does it?” He stood and drifted closer to Killian, fear making him cold. “So it doesn’t matter how jealous you are of me. If I want to transcend, I will, with or without your help.”

“Jealous?” Killian laughed. “Why the fuck would I be jealous of you?” He waved his hand to gesture at Dante. “He might be fucking you now, but soon you’ll be gone. Then he’ll come running back to me like he always does.”

“Actually, Seth fucked me,” Dante said. He was on his feet, hands on his hips.

Killian jerked his head back, his pupils shrinking to tiny pinpricks. He shook his head and then wiped a hand over his face, before turning all his attention back to Seth.

“You do need me,” he hissed. “Because you have no fucking clue what you’re doing. Nor does Dante. It’s not his job to guide the souls of the dead. It’s mine. Has he promised you that you’ll transcend, so you can fuck each other for all of eternity? He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

“So help him,” Dante said.

Killian laughed. “So you can go on damning yourself? So you can screw him and not me? How stupid do you think I am?”

Seth looked at Dante, alarm filling him. “Damning yourself? What’s he talking about, Dante?”

“Nothing. He’s trying to rattle you, that’s all. Ignore him.”

“Liar, liar,” Killian chuckled.

“Dante wouldn’t lie to me.”

“Is that so?”

Seth needed to believe it was. He trusted Dante, had given everything to him. He stared at Dante, eyes wide and silently imploring.

“He’s exaggerating, Seth,” Dante said. “Trying to stir up trouble between us. Don’t let the arrogant jerk get to you.”

“Arrogant?” Killian strode over to Dante and ran his fingertips over the other angel’s cheek. “You used to love my arrogance, especially when we enjoyed one another. My arrogance didn’t bother you all the times I sucked your cock.” He smiled ever so slightly. “Or you sucked mine.”

If Seth still had blood, he was sure it would have boiled. If he could have clenched his teeth, he would. “Don’t touch him.”

Dante grinned at him. Killian turned and snarled at him.

“He’s not your possession, boy.”

“He’s not yours, either,” Seth retorted.

Killian’s already pale lips blanched of all color as he pressed them together.

Seth forced himself to calm down. “Why do I need your help? If it’s as simple as finding a task that makes me worthy of becoming an angel in my own eyes, why would I need you instead of Dante to guide me?”

“Simple?” Killian laughed loudly, clutching his stomach with both hands. “Oh, you stupid little shit. Transcending isn’t simple. It’s hard, and there are consequences if you fail.” He sucked a breath in through his teeth. “You haven’t felt pain until your soul is ripped apart and scattered through the cosmos for eternity.”

Seth felt his form flicker as panic briefly gripped him. But he made himself hold onto Dante’s words: Killian was trying to stir up trouble and scare him. Of course, Killian didn’t want him to transcend; he wanted Dante all to himself. There was no logical reason why failing would destroy his soul. The worst thing that might happen was that he’d damn himself to eternal, mindless wandering as a poltergeist, but he was halfway to doing that already.

“I won’t help you, either of you,” Killian snarled. He grabbed Dante by the collar of his coat. “You’re weak. You need to come home with me to rest.”

“I’m fine,” Dante repeated.

“Angels recharge faster on the angelic plane,” Killian said to Seth. “You want him strong again, don’t you, Seth?” His voice was cold as he said Seth’s name. He hooked his upper lip into an unpleasant snarl.

Seth nodded slowly. Of course he did. But the thought of Dante going anywhere with Killian made him mad. Not the destructive kind of anger he’d felt when he’d tried to scare Nelson, but something more positive, if that were even remotely possible. Could any emotion fueled by love ever be truly bad?

“I don’t need to go anywhere,” Dante said.

“Yes, you do,” Seth muttered. He locked stares with Dante. “Go and get strong again.” A wicked thought occurred to him. He knew he should censor himself because he was only going to piss Killian off, but he couldn’t keep the words inside. “Then you can come back and fuck me again.”

Dante threw his head back and laughed. “And that is why I love you, Seth.”

Killian roared out a growl and gripped Dante’s coat tighter still. There was a rush of air, and then both angels were gone, leaving Seth alone. Now he had two things to focus on, one far more positive than the other: he would find a way to stop the Doctor, and he would find a way to transcend, so he and Dante could be together for eternity.