Tiffany
Watching Kyle remove his gloves and throw them on the floor, his face turning white, I wondered what the hell was wrong with him. Unable to look at me, he put his drenched t-shirt back on, covering the ballerina tattoo, and rushed out of the gym. He never looked back.
“Shit.” I ran my fingers through my wet hair, picked up his gloves and put them on, and then started hitting the bag as hard as I could. It hurt my knuckles—the gloves were too big and didn’t fit properly—but I hated to be yelled at and ignored. Why had he pushed me away so rudely? All I’d done was dance for two seconds, and he flipped. Out of breath, I got lost in my thoughts wondering how my attempt to become friends with Kyle had been ruined.
Still early in the morning, I walked home and called Nix as soon as I was inside.
“Tiff? Is that you?” Her voice was rough, and I knew I’d woken her up.
“Yeah, it’s me. I’m sorry, mate, it’s too early to ring, but I have to ask you something.”
She sighed into the phone. “Shoot.”
“Has Levi ever mentioned anything about Kyle? Why is he… how he is?”
She didn’t answer my questions. Instead, she handed the phone off to Levi, because he spoke next.
“Tiff? Why are ya calling so early? Did you meet K this morning?”
“I did. Everything was fine until I did some ballet shit, and he flipped out and left.”
Levi muttered something inaudible. “Look, Tiff…” He paused. “It’s obviously not my story to tell, but in our early twenties, Kyle was engaged to a ballerina, and he’s never gotten over her. My only advice would be not to push him too hard on the subject. He doesn’t talk about it.”
“No wonder she left him. He has such a shite attitude.” I crossed my arms over my chest.
“No, Tiff. She didn’t break up with him. She died.”
His words were a blow right to my face. I hadn’t seen that coming.
“Tiff, are you still there?”
“Yeah… um… I’m sorry for waking you guys up. I’ll see you later,” I mumbled then hung up.
As I fell to my knees, everything started to make sense in my head. How he could be outgoing with Bekka or Nix, but never with me. For him, there was no way I could be a friend and his sex buddy. He didn’t treat me the same way, but I couldn’t say he got any better from me. He didn’t. In my experience, men were assholes. Every time I trusted a man, I got hurt or humiliated.
So, why do I care now? Why Kyle? If only I knew.
My dad was the only man I’d trust with my life. My first boyfriend, Pete, had tried to sell me to gang members in exchange for drugs. I’d known he was on drugs, but never imagined him doing something so awful to me. That night forever changed my life. We all knew what kind of men they were. I would’ve probably been beaten and raped for refusing sex, and would’ve been expected to pay Pete’s debt working the streets of London as a prostitute—if I hadn’t managed to run away.
I’d come to Seattle as an exchange student, to hide for a few months, which was when I first met Tyler. He never asked questions, but helped me around town like a big brother would’ve done.
Once I felt safe enough to return to England, I kept my life as low key as possible, and ended up working as a barrister in a small café until I got an offer to work in a pub. Those were the years. The crazy ones. Money flowed and I was in the best shape of my life. I looked good and felt great. It was during one of those endless nights that I met Rob.
Rob had been born in London, was gorgeous and smart, and tattooed. My parents loved him, but I loved him more. Our seemingly perfect relationship lasted for three years. Call me blind, but I never saw the signs or the picked up on the lies. Turned out he had a double life. Rob was dating another girl while I worked my night shift, and the way I found out devastated me. I hadn’t gotten my period, which never happened to me, so during a work break one night, I took a pregnancy test, which showed positive. I told my boss I had a migraine and went to Rob’s place. Scared, but excited and happy at the same time, I couldn’t wait to tell him. When I got there, I could hear a girl moaning in the hall of the apartment building, but thought it was Rob’s roommate. Until I got into his room and saw him with another girl, I never would have believed it. Rob had been the perfect partner, until that night. That night he became the biggest asshole in the world.
“Rob. What..?” Words failed me, and I didn’t know what to say. The panic raised in me so fast, it made me dizzy.
Horror flashed in his eyes as he asked, “Tiffany, what the hell are you doing here?” Of course, he hadn’t wanted me to find out, but every good thing has to end, right?
“Who is she, baby?” the woman asked, flustered, and I hated that she used the word baby. It meant this wasn’t their first time.
“Baby? He’s my boyfriend. We’ve been together for three years. How long have you been cheating on me like this?” I cried while clutching the pregnancy test hiding inside the palm of my hand.
“Adele, shut up. Now isn’t the time.” He pulled away from her and got out of bed. His hand hid his dick, like I’d never seen it before. “It’s not what you think, Tiff.”
“Fuck you, asshole. It is exactly what I think.” I ran out of his apartment, and never saw him again.
I lost the baby three weeks later and promised myself to never date a man again. Whenever I opened my heart to one of them, it got smashed without mercy.
Kyle. Since the first night I met him, I’d known he had a dark past. Something had been different about him. The way he looked at me that night from across the bar, he didn’t quite smile but it wasn’t a frown either. Sexy mixed with mysterious, Kyle had caught my attention. My flight back to Seattle had been long and exhausting, and he appeared to be willing to give me what I wanted and nothing more—sex.
While his face hid his emotions, his actions made me feel comfortable. Like the way his hands danced across my skin with such delicate finesse. There was something vulnerable about him, and no matter how much he tried to hide it behind his cold-as-ice facade or his bad boy tattoos, I could feel it. Which explained why I kept ringing him. That Tyler knew him well helped, too. Somehow, I trusted this man, and up until an hour ago, he hadn’t seemed to mind my company.
Still on the floor lost and confused, the memories of my past culminated with the sadness I felt for K and the death of his fiancée to break my heart. Crying to ease the pain seemed all I could do. When the stiffness in my legs couldn’t be ignored anymore, I hesitated between a bath and my bed, and then picked the bed. It waited for me as I had left it way too early today. Sleep would help me forget the morning I’d had.
Tears rolling down my temples to my pillow, I tried to create a void in my mind. A few hours of sleep before work tonight were much needed. Instead, my mind wandered, wondering if Kyle would show up at the club or not.
But that shouldn’t matter, right? Because he’s just a fuck-buddy. Nothing more.