Chapter 12

Adam

After leaving Rainbow House for the night I find a text from Owen.

 

 

Owen: up for grabbing a drink?

Me: sure, meet at O’Malley’s in fifteen?

Owen: cool

 

 

This is the first time Owen has reached out to me to hang out so I’m not sure what to expect. Is he finally getting comfortable and wants to make friends? Is something bothering him and he needs someone to talk to? Or does he just not like drinking alone?

I point my car in the direction of O’Malley’s so I can find out.

When I walk in I nod a greeting to the ‘hot bartender’ as Dani calls him. I believe his actual name is Beau. But with the way he always flirts with customers, both men and women, I doubt he’d object to being called hot bartender either.              

Then, I spot Owen sitting on the far end of the bar nursing a beer.

Owen walked into Heathens six months ago looking for a job. I hadn’t particularly been looking for someone at the time but when I led him back to my office I could tell he was nervous. Then, he sat down in the chair I offered, looked me right in the eye, and told me he just got out of prison but the charges were trumped up. He said he was desperate for a second chance and would do anything to prove himself.

I couldn’t find it in my heart to turn him away. I can only imagine how difficult it must be to find a job with a criminal conviction on your record. And then he showed me a portfolio of the tattoos he’d done before he was locked up and I couldn’t turn him down.

Owen has remained a bit quiet and reserved, but he’s brought a raw, unique style to Heathens that sets him apart from the other artists and has a line of clients waiting months for an appointment with him.

“Hey man,” I greet him, sliding onto the stool next to his.

“Hey.”

It only takes a minute for my favorite beer to appear in front of me with a smile from Beau.

“You seeing anyone, Beau?” I ask, and then blush when he smiles at me.

“Why? Are you interested?”

“Not me, Dani. She’s the-”

“I know who she is,” Beau assures me. “She’s cute, I’ll have to keep that in mind. Things are kind of complicated with my roommate right now, we’re in a weird friends with benefits place and I’m not sure either of us knows where we want it to go from here. Or, rather, where it should go. He’s a great guy, too good for me...Oh lord, I’m rambling,” Beau puts a hand over his mouth and laughs. I hadn’t noticed the faint southern lilt to his voice before. I’ve gotta give it to Dani, she’s got good taste.

“Good luck with your roommate,” I offer.

“Thanks, darlin’.” Beau winks and then saunters away.

“He’s hot, too bad Dani’s already got dibs,” Owen laments, watching Beau’s ass as he retreats.

“Yeah,” I agree, slightly mesmerized by the sight as well.

When Owen’s eyes cut over to me with surprise I realize my mistake.

“Oh, shit.” I close my eyes and take a deep gulp of my beer.

“I suspected, but I wasn’t sure.”

“You suspected? Damn, maybe I’m worse at hiding it than I thought. First Kira, then Royal, now you. Maybe Gage already knows, too.”

“Nah, Gage is oblivious,” Owen assures me. “Why are you hiding, anyway?”

“It’s complicated. Suffice to say Gage will hate me because I kept it a secret too long so now I can’t see a way out without losing my best friend.”

“Life’s too short not to experience,” Owen says wisely.

“Believe me, I know about how short life is.”

My mind goes immediately to Johnny and all the things he’ll never get to experience. Would he and Gage have gotten married one day? Had a few kids? What career would he have chosen? What kind of a man would Johnny have grown to be?

All these unanswered questions because he chose to take his life instead of talk to one of us. A familiar anger simmers in the pit of my stomach, followed by guilt for feeling anything but love for my dead brother.

“So, not that I’m complaining, but is this just a social hang out or should I be worried about you?” I ask.

“Social,” Owen shrugs. “I’ve been stand-offish since I’ve started at Heathens and that needs to change. I like working for you, and I like everyone at the shop. I’m going to start making more of an effort.”

“That’s awesome, I’m glad to hear that.”

“Now, back to the more interesting subject at hand, are you and Nox hooking-up then or what?”

“What? Where did you even get that idea?”

“He looks at you like you’re his savior. He’s got it bad for you.”

“Wouldn’t it be skeevy for me to fool around with an employee?”

“That depends.”

“On?”

“Whether the employee wants to fool around with you,” Owen says with a laugh.

“We knew each other before,” I admit.

“You did?”
“Yeah, we used to talk online. I didn’t know it when I hired him, he told me a few days later. We always got along so well online, I felt like he really got me.”

“You’ve convinced me, you absolutely have to go for it. It’s too perfect to pass up,” Owen insists.

“You think?”

“I think,” Owen mocks. “Go for it or you might end up regretting it.”

“I’ll consider it, thanks man. So, we’ve dug into my love life, what about yours?”

“Not much going on,” Owen shrugs. “I don’t feel like it’s the right time for me right now. I need a few years to play the field. Believe it or not I’m a big believer in fate and intuition. When the time is right, the person for me will be there.”

“That is surprisingly zen for an ex-con.”

“Hey, you don’t even know what I was in prison for. Maybe I started some hippie cult,” he challenges.

“Did you?”

“No.”

We both laugh and I feel extremely glad Owen decided to reach out to me tonight. This was exactly what I needed and I think Owen is going to become a great friend.

 

When I get home a few hours later Nox is sitting on the couch in the dark watching something on the television.

“Hey,” I whisper in case Gage is asleep.

Nox startles and screeches, clutching his chest like an old lady having a heart attack.

“Jesus fuck, you scared the hell out of me.”

“I’m sorry,” I cover my mouth to suppress my laugh.

“I’m watching some movie on Netflix where this deaf chick doesn’t know there’s a dude in her house, then you sneak up on me like that. I nearly peed myself.”

I plop down on the couch beside him, Owen’s words ringing in my ears.

“You should’ve seen your face when I scared you,” I tease, mimicking his terrified expression for comedic effect.

Nox punches my shoulder and laughs.

“Shut up, you would’ve been scared, too.”

 

 

Nox

The air in the room seems to shift as our laughter fades. I look over at Adam and find him looking back.

His eyes flick over my face like he’s searching for something and the crease between his brows makes me wonder what he’s thinking so hard about. I wonder for the millionth time how he kisses, what his lips taste like. I’ve never been this obsessed with kissing before but my brain is like a broken record lately.

Subconsciously, I feel myself leaning forward, and to my surprise, Adam is leaning forward too.

Our mutual approach is slow and measured, like we’re both afraid to scare the other off if we move too fast.

His breath smells like chocolate as it bathes my face and my hands start to tremble. I mentally send out a prayer to every deity I can think of not to let Adam come to his senses until after I get the chance to kiss him and know what it feels like for just a few seconds.

When his lips finally ghost against mine it’s like an electric jolt to every nerve ending. Then, he lets out a defeated sound and crushes his lips against mine and my heart nearly explodes out of my chest.

The kiss is sweet and exploratory as his tongue sweeps against my lips, seeking access. I open to him without hesitation, looping my arms around the back of his neck and pulling myself flush against him.

My skin feels like it’s the only thing keeping me from bursting into a million beams of light.

Adam’s hands gently roam my body. Not harsh and demanding like I’m used to, but reverently. Each breathy sound that falls from his lips between kisses burrows into my heart to make a permanent home.

Adam pulls his lips from mine and I whimper in protest. He presses his forehead against mine as we both attempt to catch our breath.

“I’m so sorry. God that was so inappropriate,” Adam laments in a pained tone.

“No.” I clutch desperately at the front of his shirt, unwilling to let him pull away. “Please, don’t tell me that the best moment of my life was a mistake.”

“You’re my employee, and you’re going through so much,” Adam argues weakly.

“I don’t care. Please, Adam, give it a chance. Give us a chance?” I don’t know what’s making me so bold, but now that I’ve had a taste of what it can feel like to have someone care about you, I can’t let it go, not without a fight.

“Okay,” Adam breathes after a second and I nearly cry in relief before scrambling into his lap and kissing him again.

More confident now, my tongue sweeps along the inside of Adam’s hot mouth. His hands grip my hips and then wander up my back, underneath my shirt. I shiver at the contact of his rough fingers against my skin.

As our kissing drags on with no attempt on Adam’s part to get my clothes off I start to feel out of my depth. I don’t think he’s been with a guy before so am I supposed to let him set the pace? Or, is he assuming I’ll lead? Then something else occurs to me...it’s only fair for me to tell Adam the full extent of my past before he makes the decision to be in a sexual relationship with me.

I force myself to end the kiss and lean back on his lap.

“Can we talk for a minute?” I ask, putting my hands on his pecs and then running them slowly up to his shoulders before bringing them up to rub his neck. He gives an appreciative moan at the impromptu massage and tilts into my touch like a cat being pet.

“Of course we can talk. You’d better stop that before you put me to sleep, though.”

Adam’s hands slide down to my waist and his thumbs start to trace rhythmic circles against the skin of my hips.

“The thing is...I used to, um, do things for money.” I bite down on my bottom lip as soon as the words are out, heart thundering as I wait for Adam’s reaction.

His eyes fill with pity and concern.

“I kind of figured,” he admits.

“I was tested for STD’s in the hospital after…” I gesture to the scars on my arms instead of saying the words out loud. “And I haven’t been with anyone or shot up since then, so I’m safe and everything. I mean, obviously we should still use condoms. If you even want to fool around with me, of course.”

Adam cuts off my rambling with a quick press of his lips to mine.

“I want you, Nox. I would’ve thought that was pretty obvious,” he teases, pressing his hips up against me so I can feel his erection against my ass. “We don’t need to rush anything. You might’ve guessed that I haven’t been with a guy before but that doesn’t mean I want to jump straight into bed. Can I take you on a date?”

“You want to date me?” My stomach flutters. No one has wanted to date me before. Sure, Harrison took me out to fancy dinners and stuff but that wasn’t the same. That was to soften me up so he could use me. I’d spent a lot of time discussing abusive relationships with my therapist in rehab.

“Yeah, if that’s okay with you.”

“It’s okay with me,” I feel a smile spreading across my lips as I look at Adam with a sudden shyness. Is it possible this is real? Can a man like Adam really want a man like me? “It has to be a secret, doesn’t it?” I ask, realizing what the catch is.

“For now. I’m sorry. Is that okay?”

I think about it for a few seconds. I don’t love the idea of having to sneak around with Adam. But it’s not something I can’t live with.

“It’s okay,” I assure him.

“Tomorrow, I’ll take you on our first date.”

“You’re kind of sweet, has anyone ever told you that?”

“No and you’d better not go spreading that around. I have a reputation to uphold as rugged and masculine.”

“Your secret’s safe with me,” I assure him with feigned solemnity.

Adam pinches my side and I giggle, attempting to wiggle out of his grasp. But Adam wraps his arms around me and covers my lips with his once again. My heart flutters and flips at the playful way he teases and nips at my mouth.

“Are you sure you need to take me on a date first?” I tease, circling my hips to grind my ass against the distinct bulge he’s sporting.

Adam groans quietly and cants his hips up against me.

“Yes, I need to take you on a date first because you deserve it. You’re not just a place to stick my dick, you’re a person who’s important to me. I want to do this right.”

My throat tightens and my eyes feel a little misty. Unable to form words, I wrap my arms around Adam’s neck and pull him in for the tightest hug I can muster.

His arms are strong around my waist as he returns the hug, his hot breath tickling my neck, his touch filling my entire body with a peaceful warmth I’ve never felt before.

“I should go to bed,” I say, pulling away reluctantly.

“Okay. Sleep well.” Adam kisses his index finger and then pressing it to my lips.

My heart gives a little flutter at the adorable gesture from a man who seems so outwardly gruff.

“Dream of me?” I ask hopefully.

“Count on it, Bird.”

“Bird?” I ask, cocking my head to the side.

“You are the phoenix. You’re a bird born out of fire, never destroyed, only ever becoming stronger.”

“You are way too charming, it’s dangerous,” I accuse, narrowing my eyes with playful suspicion. “Good night.”

I hop off his lap and head for my bedroom before I can change my mind.