Liv
I was taken to a hospital. I didn’t know this since I’d been forcibly given a sedative back at the house. I had dreamed of Grey over and over, picturing him chasing the ambulance and tearing off the back door and flying away with me in his arms like he’s Superman. My Superman. Only he wouldn’t be dressed in diapers and leggings. He’s wearing all black and covers my body with his cape like it was a blanket as we bounced from cloud to cloud. I felt like I had been living that dream my entire life but found it to be a cruel, cruel lie when I finally woke up.
I awoke in a hospital room, sedatives dripping from an IV that was attached to one of my arms. I was groggy and could barely open my mouth to lick my chapped lips. I was dazed and confused as to how I ended up in the hospital. My mind went wild as I tried to come up with a solid, reasonable explanation why I would be in the hospital.
I hadn’t broken any bones or anything, had I? I tried to move my arms to check for any bruises or a cast, and that’s when I noticed it. My freaking arms were strapped down to the bed. I panicked and felt my head burst from the inside out as I thrashed all around. The sharp leather holding me down cut into my skin, and I began screaming my lungs out. Screaming for help and demanding answers. I freaked out and exerted myself until I fell back asleep.
When I finally came to consciousness again, a young female doctor with big green eyes and soft-looking skin was waiting for me. I felt my heart hammer when my muddled brain reminded me that I was tied down and had no idea how I ended up in the hospital.
“Why am I here?” I asked her.
She smiled at me and told me, “You’re here for your treatment.”
“For what?” I questioned her when two nurses came in, headed toward me. I tried to scoot back, but they grabbed my wrists and pinned me down. “How—why am I here? Please, please—tell me!” I pleaded with wide eyes as she peered over me, clutching a clipboard to her chest.
“You’re here to forget Grey, sweetie…” she said, then broke out into a grin.
Oh God, I thought. She sounds like my mother, which means…oh God.
The sedatives came in waves, knocking me out and pulling me under, pushing me up, and then dragging me back under. I tried to hold my breath and fight against the rough waters, but her soothing words of forgetting the big bad man that has a hold on me kept challenging me. I almost let her overtake me, but the thought of Grey and his soft smile as he watched me run up to him after he’d come home, tired and needy for me, kept me sane. Well, enough for her to stop her “therapist” ways.
After this, I’m not so sure I want to be a psychologist anymore…not if this, trying to convince your patients they should not be with who they love, is what the job entails. And it hurts me deeply to think this way, because I have dreamed of helping others who need it since I was eight years old, since I lost my little brother in a tragic accident that should have never happened. I don’t want her or any other cruel people to deter me from my dream, but it’s incredibly hard when they continuously tell me my thoughts and beliefs are wrong and should be altered.
Hours later and I am huddled in one of the corners of the hospital room. I am tired beyond comprehension and have a hole inside my heart. I want Grey so badly; my heart is literally yearning for him. I have cold sweats and shaking hands. I want to get up and walk out of this dreadful place, but they probably have it surrounded with armed guards, per my mother’s request.
My mother.
I want to say that I can’t believe what she has done, but it would be a total lie. This, what she is doing, is sickening and has put the last straw on the camel’s back, my freaking back. I thought after the slapping incident maybe, maybe we could work out our relationship. I thought maybe she would see me as her daughter and not some clay thing she could mold into the perfect girl with the perfect husband and their perfect kids. I am not, nor will I ever be, that girl! I will be with Grey. We may not have kids or get married, but I will always, and I mean always, love him.
But her sending me to the hospital to be brainwashed and treated like I’m not a human being has broken me as a person, as a daughter. She is unbelievable and underhanded. I don’t think I can ever recover from this treason. Ever.
A tear falls down my cheek, and I rub my lower lip. I press my face into my drawn-up knees and let it all out, sobbing and shaking until I am dried out as a well. At this point, I just want to go home. I want Grey to come rescue me like the knight in shining coal he is. And I want him to shower me with kisses and tell me it’s okay. I need him to come right now, but I can’t—I don’t even know where my phone is. They must have taken it when they changed me into this hospital gown.
I am praying when there is a loud slam. Thinking it’s the nurses to bring me to that room where the doctor tried to scramble my brain, I scream and try to scramble back, only to come up empty, since I’m in the corner, my hands drawn up in fear.