Chapter Eleven

 

Getting back into the swing of things at Immunity was easier than I expected. I poured margarita mix over tequila and shook it up, smiling at the young men who sat at the bar and watched me. I was dressed in a super-tight shimmery black tee shirt and tight jeans, but I felt comfortable in this environment, happy to be out of that wood nymph costume. Dance music pumped through the sound system, and I swayed my hips as I poured the drinks.

There were a lot of fresh young faces, but also a lot of people who recognized me, happy to see I’d returned. Sweaty men danced on the lighted floor, then poured up to the bar, thirsty and waving their cash. The tips had been piling up faster than I could count them, and once again I had that comfortable feeling, that I would be okay. I was a survivor.

I hadn’t heard from Duncan all day, and my heart hurt because of it. Surely he’d heard by now that I quit. I’d spent all afternoon pondering if he was mad at me or if he just didn’t give a shit. I honestly didn’t know. I’d expected a phone call, even if he was pissed. Especially if he was pissed, wanting an explanation. But I’d gotten nothing. Which reinforced the theory I’d been leaning toward for a while now—that Duncan sincerely did not give a shit about me.

But once I got to work, the lights and the laughter and the music brought me out of it. I was too busy to agonize over the gorgeous older man who’d lured me in with his charm and blown my mind in bed. The Other Stengel was apparently out of my life now, and I’d just have to push through my feelings until I made it out the other side.

As the night grew later, several customers propositioned me. I declined, but it didn’t bother me the way it used to. It didn’t matter what they thought of me. I knew who I was now, and I would decide my value.

At the end of the night I counted my tips, and was flabbergasted. I’d never made money like this at Immunity when I worked here a couple years ago. Were young gay men getting more generous? Maybe it was my confidence. I hadn’t possessed any back then. But tonight I was on, smiling and flashing my moves, feeling in my element again. I was a bartender in a dance club pickup joint, and that was okay for now. I was making a living, and I would not be ashamed.

I was on an independence high as I walked home from the club, proud of myself for getting out of that bad situation at Mythic. And it was bad, emotionally and professionally. But I’d recognized that I was getting down on myself, that I’d made a mistake. And I’d rectified it. Might not sound like much, but to me it was a big deal. In the past, I would let bad situations go on and on, putting my own feelings last.

Another plus was that Immunity was in my neighborhood, so I could walk back and forth to work, get drunk after my shift if I wanted, leave the house only fifteen minutes before I started. I felt light, at ease, and in control.

Until I approached the door to my building, and a voice behind me said, “What exactly do you think you’re doing?”

I whirled around. Duncan stood on the sidewalk, hands in his pockets. He looked gorgeous in brown dress pants and a black silk shirt, open at the collar, that silver chain glinting under the streetlight. A warm night breeze ruffled his brown hair, his sparkling eyes narrowed. I felt that gaze like an electric jolt run through me. I hadn’t seen him since the night we spent together, and in my reprieve, had vastly underestimated the effect he had on me. And I couldn’t believe he was outside my apartment building at this ungodly hour.

“Duncan.” I walked toward him, my keys jangling in my hand. “What are you doing?”

“Me? What are you doing? I showed up at the club tonight to find out you’d quit.”

“Shit, really? I figured Barry would have told you sooner.”

“So it’s true?” He took a step toward me. “You quit?”

“Yeah. I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to talk to you. You weren’t around. It’s just something I felt I needed to do, Duncan.”

His eyes traveled over me, assessing my appearance. “Nice shirt. A little tight, don’t you think?”

I was taken aback. The comment was very un-Duncan-like. “Tight? After that forest creature costume you had me wearing? I don’t think so.”

“That was part of a theme. You’re walking down the street like this.”

I stepped forward, tilting my chin. “Like what?”

“Like you’re advertising your body.”

My brows shot up. I hadn’t thought Duncan possessed that Stengel sucker-punch like Corey. I hadn’t thought he could be mean. I was mistaken. “Did you just say I look like a whore? You, who dressed me up and called me your little wood nymph before you fucked me?”

“I never said little. And I don’t recall ever claiming you were mine. Though I was quite drunk the night I took you home, so I can’t be sure.”

“I see. Well, you didn’t seem that drunk. Didn’t affect your performance much.”

“I have a lot of experience fucking while intoxicated. It’s like muscle memory.”

Ouch. What the hell was happening? “Are you deliberately trying to hurt my feelings, Duncan?”

“Hurt your feelings?” He closed the distance until we were eye to eye. “You walked out on the job without a word to me. You just…left. With no explanation. That hurt my feelings, Zach. That hurt me a lot.”

“You’ve got my recipes. You can train someone else to run the garden bar.”

“I don’t care about the fucking recipes!”

I flinched. Duncan wasn’t much of a swearer. Those eyes that were usually dancing with teasing humor, now looked tight with anguish. “Do you want to go upstairs so we can talk without standing on the road and drawing attention to ourselves?”

He gave me a slight nod. “If you’re comfortable with that.”

“I’m not. My apartment is shitty and I’d rather not show it to you. But I do want to talk. I’m sorry I left the way I did. I had my reasons.”

He ran his fingers through his hair. “Reasons you opted not to share with me. I’m feeling a little blindsided, Zach.”

“Okay, I can understand that. You want to come upstairs and talk then? So I can explain?”

“Sure. I’ll come up for a minute.”

Duncan looked weird and out of place standing on my sidewalk in his nice outfit, and he’d likely look weirder still in my tiny apartment. But I was done playing the shame game with myself, so I unlocked the door and led him inside.

He said nothing as I trudged up the three flights of stairs, just followed quietly behind me. When I unlocked my apartment and led him inside, he paused for a moment, glancing around. Shit, at least I’d cleaned. But the surprise in his expression tried to activate my shame again. He’d clearly not expected my home to be quite this small.

I shook it off and tossed my keys on the counter. “The sofa’s kind of lumpy. You can just sit down on the bed.”

“I’ll stand.”

“Suit yourself. You want a drink or something.”

“I’m fine.”

Damn, he was being chilly. I kicked my shoes off and went and sat on the bed, propping pillows behind me and crossing my legs. Duncan strolled over and stood at the end. “What happened, Zach?”

I frowned. “I thought you’d know why I quit.”

Hesitantly, he sat down on the edge of the bed. “Well, you’re wrong. I thought you were happy.”

“Duncan.” I sighed. “I’ve worked long and hard to feel good about myself, the choices I make. I couldn’t keep working for you after what happened between us. The aftermath made me feel bad about myself.”

“The aftermath?” He shook his head, looking genuinely confused. “I don’t understand.”

“We had sex, Duncan.”

“Yes. I’m aware.”

“And you’re my employer.”

“Oh.” He nodded. “So this is a moral high ground thing.”

I laughed. “What? No. Duncan, you…you didn’t talk to me for a month after that. And after talking to Shaylin last night it seems like you were actively avoiding me. Maybe you don’t think it was a big deal, but you could have least contacted me and asked how I felt. When you disappeared for so long after, didn’t even pop in at work? I felt used. After all the conversations we had, where I opened up to you about my past, I figured you would have been more aware that was a possibility.”

He kept his gaze on me, brows pinched. He looked irritated and confused, but said nothing.

“I didn’t quit just because you didn’t call me and say sweet things or whatever. I would have been okay even if you’d dropped by the bar to talk about the weather. I quit because you pay my salary, so you ignoring me so completely made me feel like a prostitute. Because of that, I couldn’t enjoy the job anymore. I need to value myself, and this whole thing made me feel…devalued.”

“Zach, I do value you.” He growled and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Am I losing my mind here? Because I’m confused. You told me to stay away from you.”

I shook my head. “What are you talking about?”

“After our text exchange, where you said you wanted me to stay away, I didn’t want to crowd you. So I gave you space. I was afraid you’d thought I’d taken advantage of you.”

“Duncan, I never told you to stay away from me.”

Duncan muttered a curse then pulled his phone out. He scowled at it as he thumbed through. “Here.” He handed me his phone. “Right there.”

I stared at his phone, at the text exchange between us. The last entry…oh God.

‘I’ll talk to you eventually but give me some space, there’s a lot going on right now’.

“Oh my God.” I set his phone down and closed my eyes, rubbing my temples.

“Zach?”

I blinked my eyes open and winced. “Duncan…I’m sorry. I fucked up. That text was supposed to go to my mother.”

His brow cocked. “Your mother.” He sounded skeptical.

“Yes, I swear. She was bugging me to commit to dinner and we’re in an awful fight. I’d been texting with you earlier. I must have hit the wrong…shit, Duncan. That’s why I haven’t seen you at work?”

He chuckled, but it was soft and without warmth. “That’s why, Zach. After I got that text, I feared if I came around you’d think I was trying to force some arrangement between us. I thought if I called you or came around at work you’d think I was expecting something from you. Making you feel like a prostitute is exactly what I was trying to avoid. I didn’t want you to feel like that. So I stayed away. You went on working, so I suspected you were fine. But I was giving you space. I figured if you wanted to talk, you’d have contacted me. But I’ve heard nothing.”

“Shit Duncan.” I groaned. “Shit, I’m sorry. You didn’t think it was weird that I said that? After I’d just been being all friendly chatty?”

He shook his head, sighing. “I did think it was strange. But I had no reason to question it was authentic. I was worried I’d crossed the line. I’ve never slept with an employee before.”

Oh. That last sentence gave me a little charge, and I was incredibly relieved. “I guess it was a communication breakdown,” I said. “I’m really sorry.”

“Zach, why didn’t you contact me if you were feeling like this? If you were hurt?”

I flushed. “I’m sorry. I should have communicated better. I was trying to make sure you didn’t feel beholden to me.”

Duncan’s pretty eyes narrowed, and he shifted a few inches closer. “Why on earth would I feel beholden to you?”

Because I wanted more from you. I still do. “Forget it. We’re good. And I’m sorry about the misunderstanding, that’s my fault. But after all this, I’ve realized some things about myself. I don’t think I can work for you anymore.”

“But why? If we’ve cleared up this misunderstanding, why can’t you come back to work?”

I couldn’t tell him I was between a rock and a hard place. That I wanted to fuck him some more, but that I didn’t want to be fucking my boss. And even if he insisted there wouldn’t be any more fucking, I’d still be wanting it. And having to work for him would only make it worse. Last night was proof of that. But he didn’t seem to have the same reservations.

“You’d really want me to keep working for you? After all this?”

He shrugged, and his amused smirk appeared. I was happy to see its return. “Maybe I like having you around, Zach.”

Warmth spread through my belly at his comment, like I’d been drowning and he’d just tossed me a life preserver. But it wasn’t the job I wanted to save. “I like having you around too,” I said. “I like having you here right now. Sitting on my bed.”

Duncan stilled, and his gaze flicked over my body before meeting my eyes. “I’m certain there are many others you could have here on your bed in an instant. Especially dressed like that.”

“Stop hacking on my clothes. I worked at Immunity tonight. This is standard attire.”

His head jerked back. “You’ve got another job already?”

“Yeah. At the gay club down the street where I worked before.”

“I see.” A flash of hurt crossed over his expression. “You got another job already. Jesus.”

“I just…things came to a head and I just reacted, Duncan. I hadn’t heard from you when everyone else had. I thought you were ignoring me, especially after talking to Shaylin. And this guy came into the bar and was talking about kissing you, and I…I reacted.”

Duncan frowned. “What guy?”

“Dana? Said he met you at a party.”

“Oh. Him. I only met him briefly. I’m not dating him.”

“But you are dating. Right? Others?”

“What does who I date have to do with any of this?”

“Look, I get it, Duncan, you have a life, and we’ve only slept together once. But I work for you, at your club, where your friends come in. Your…lovers. And your life, it’ll all be there on display for me. I’m not good at stuff like this. If I didn’t work for you it wouldn’t be a huge issue. But I do. Did. So because of all that I just can’t work for you right now. Maybe that can change at some point but…I can’t right now.”

Duncan’s expression went from confusion to disappointment.

“I know it was my choice, going home with you,” I said. “I thought I could handle mixing business with pleasure. But I fucked up. I can’t.”

He nodded. “So that’s it.”

“Yeah. That’s it.”

“I understand.” He took in a deep breath, then he stood. “Well, I’ll miss you, Zach. I really will. But I wish you well.” He gave me a tight smile, nodded, then headed for the door.

I’d been hoping he’d read between the lines. That he’d see where I was going with this. Not the job thing. He seemed to understand that. But he didn’t understand that I still wanted to spend time with him…socially. Sexually. But why was I waiting for him to broach it? Keeping my mouth shut, waiting for him to come to me? That’s how I’d fucked this all up in the first place. If I’d not been so afraid of looking clingy. If I’d just talked to him, maybe I wouldn’t have made such a mess of things. I refused to make that same mistake now.

I bounded off the mattress, and as Duncan reached for the knob, I grasped his arm. “Don’t go.”

He paused. “Why not?”

My stomach trembled. I could smell his cologne, feel his body heat through his shirt, and I wanted him so bad it made me ache. I fought my nerves and slid my arm around his waist, leaning my chest into his back. “Because I missed you. And because I don’t want you to go.”

He turned around and leaned against the door, studying me as he took my hands in his. “This is what started all the trouble, Zach. The way you’re looking at me now.”

“I can’t help the way I look at you.”

He sighed, his expression conflicted. He appeared poised and calm, but I could see his pulse jumping in his neck. “You confuse me, Zach. You really do,” he said, but he tugged me closer and slid his arms around my waist. “I’m starting to understand why my nephew winces whenever your name is brought up.”

“Don’t talk about him,” I said, my heart banging in my chest. “Or I’ll have to gag you.”

A smile curved Duncan’s lips.

“You do remember saying that to me. Don’t you?”

“I remember everything,” he said, his voice dropping low. “Especially the way you taste.” He drew me into a kiss, tongue flicking mine. “There it is,” he breathed against my lips. “That sweet taste of you.”

My eyes closed and a groan escaped. I was lucky that’s all I did, because my cock was throbbing and I felt like I was about to melt into the floor. This man could undo me in a matter of seconds, and I wanted him so much I felt dizzy. “Stay,” I said. “Spend the night in my bed.”

“That’s really what you want? Me in your bed?”

“Yes. You can refuse me if you want. But I’ll be disappointed.”

“I don’t think I could refuse you anything,” he whispered, nibbling along my jawline. “I knew I was screwed the moment I met you.” He nuzzled my neck. “That if you asked, I’d give you anything you want.”

I shivered at his words. “I want more of you,” I whispered. “That’s what I want.”

“And I want more of you.” He tugged at the bottom of my shirt, trying to lift it up. “I told you this thing was too damn tight, I can’t even get it off you.”

I chuckled and stepped back, peeling my shirt off. Then I took his hand, leading him back to the bed. “I like that shirt you’re wearing tonight,” I said. “I like you in black.”

I dropped his hand and he began unbuttoning his shirt, gaze locked on mine. “Thank you. But it’s coming off now.”

“That’s fine. I like you in just skin better.”

Duncan grinned. “Likewise.”

I flicked off the lamp, and the moonlight coming down from the skylights made everything blue and shadowy as I watched Duncan slip his shirt off. I went to him and ran my fingers through the soft hair under his neck, gliding my palms over his firm chest. “My jeans are tight too,” I said. “You want me to take them off for you?”

“Please, allow me,” he said, then pushed me roughly onto the mattress.

My hips jerked as Duncan yanked my jeans open then made quick work of tugging them off me. Because they were so tight I’d worn a thong underneath, and Duncan leaned over and dragged it off with his teeth, so aggressive suddenly I was taken aback, but my erection liked it just fine, rising up off my belly.

I didn’t want to be passive, so I sat up and grabbed the hem of his pants. “Now you,” I said, unzipping his fly. Duncan kicked his shoes off, then rested a hand on my head as I slid his pants down. I quickly looked up when I realized he wasn’t wearing underwear, his cock thick and hard and definitely happy. “Well, look at you going freestyle.”

“It’s hot tonight,” he said and tackled me, dragging me up on the mattress. “And you’ve made me hotter still.”

“The window’s open, but I’m sorry, I don’t have air conditioning.”

Duncan wrestled me onto my back and pinned my wrists down on the mattress, brown hair hanging over his eyes. “Then I’ll have to buy you one,” he said and his hips shifted, gliding his cock against mine, making me close my eyes and moan.

“You don’t have to buy me things,” I said, my voice breathy.

“What if I want to buy you things?” He licked my bottom lip. “What if it would give me pleasure to give you everything you need?”

My chest ached at his words, because we’d already had the whole prostitution talk. He wouldn’t be walking that line with me, not after our argument. This felt like something else. I fought free of his grip and forced him onto his back, straddling him. “What if this is all I need?”

“Oh Christ.” His hips lifted and lids fluttered as his hands slapped down on my hips. “You feel good like this, on top of me.”

“Yeah?” I squeezed him with my thighs and moved my hips, sliding his cock between my ass cheeks. “You want me like this, Duncan?”

He sat up and grabbed me around the neck, easing me down with him. “Want your mouth first. Staring at it while we were talking was killing me because I thought I could never have it again.”

Duncan kissed me roughly. My mouth opened as his fingers gripped the sides of my face, tongue licking mine. I loved the urgent way he kissed me, like my mouth was something he couldn’t get enough of. Corey had been magic with his hands but he’d never kissed me like this. No one had ever kissed me like this, and I got lost in it, our mouths staying locked as he rolled me over and pinned me beneath him again.

We’d both started to sweat, but I didn’t mind, it added to the intimacy, the heated passion of silky naked flesh gliding together. While Duncan’s kiss grew more intense, he writhed on top of me and touched every bit of skin on my body he could reach. Suddenly, this felt real. This wasn’t a drunken hookup and it wasn’t a mistake. I allowed myself to believe, at least in that moment, that Duncan felt it too. I wanted him inside me, ached to be filled with him.

Wrapping my legs around him, I dug my heels into his ass and tore my lips from his. “Do you wanna fuck me?”

He smiled. “Yeah, I wanna fuck you.”

Duncan could move fast, I’d noticed it the last time we’d been in bed together. So I wasn’t too surprised when he shifted suddenly and rolled me onto my stomach. I was surprised, however, by the hard slap on my ass.

“Yow!” I jerked.

“That’s for quitting without telling me.”

I laughed into the pillow then lifted my head. “I’m sorry I quit without telling you.”

“Are you? Good.” He slapped my other cheek. “That’s for not talking to me, for not letting me know you were hurt so I could make it better.”

I smiled. “I’m sorry for that too.” The pleasant tingly feeling surprised me. I was usually dead set against anything too rough in bed, including spanking. I’d been hit with malice too many times and it had left a scar in my psyche. But something about Duncan slapping my ass now felt…comforting.

“You’re sorry?” he asked.

“Yes. I’m sorry.”

He gave me another hard slap.

I flinched, but couldn’t stop laughing. “What was that for?”

He chuckled. “That one’s just for fun. And because your ass is so slapable.”

“Okay but…oh my God. Oh damn, what are you doing…” Duncan’s tongue parted my cheeks and probed my entrance.

“Making it better,” he said softly, then blew on me. “Better late than never.” He licked again, sliding his tongue inside me. He repeated the action until my eyes rolled back. I panted, squirming, my hips circling as I tried to endure it, but that only made my cock slide against the sheet and the pleasure more intense.

“Duncan,” I gasped. “You’re killing me.”

He licked a line up my crack as he ran his hand up my spine. “Where are your supplies?”

“In the bathroom. Medicine cabinet.”

He slapped my ass, a bit more gently this time. “Do not move.”

I felt the mattress shift as he climbed off the bed. Hugging the pillow, I realized I was trembling. My ass still tingled, not just where he’d slapped it, but inside where his tongue had lit all my nerves up like a switchboard.

I looked over my shoulder when I heard Duncan return, admiring his naked form in the moonlight. He was fit and beautiful, but I really liked that his body wasn’t plastic perfect like the young men I’d served drinks to all night. I loved the small brush of hair on his chest, and I loved his face, especially the way his eyes met mine as he climbed onto the mattress. His cock was still erect and sheathed in a condom now.

“You didn’t move.” He smiled and ran his hand up my back, then leaned down and kissed my neck.

“You told me not to. I was afraid I’d get spanked again.”

He slid down beside me and stroked fingers down my spine, then over my ass. “I want you to move now,” he whispered. “Get on top of me like you were before. I want to watch your body move while we fuck.”

I rose up and slung my leg over as he rolled onto his back. His gaze was intense when I lined his cock up, hovering over his hips. “This what you want?”

His fingers drifted over my stomach, then both hands grasped my cock. His eyes stayed locked on mine. “This is exactly what I want, Zach,” he said. “What I’ve been wanting. I missed you too.”

My heart fluttered. I slid down onto him and he hissed, his grip tightening on my cock, and pleasure stole through me from all sides. I rested my hands on his chest and stared down at him as I rose up and took him in again. “This is exactly what I want too.”

One hand reached up and touched my face, the other continued to stroke me. “Then take it. It’s yours.”

I rode Duncan hard but slow, watching his eyes, loving the way his brows pinched and he hissed when I got the angle just right. He seemed mesmerized by the sight of me, his gaze roaming over my body. His hips lifted and met mine, trying to match my rhythm, or maybe because he couldn’t help himself.

“I thought about this,” he said in that silky, husky voice that drove me crazy. “Before I ever kissed you, I thought about this.”

“When?” I asked, my breathing heavy as my prostate lit up, sweat dripping down my back. “When did you think about this?”

His fist slowed on my cock, running his thumb over the head and making me catch my breath. “I was watching you work in the main bar one day. You climbed onto a stool to get a bottle that was too high up. I looked at the muscles in your legs and thought…damn he looks strong. Bet he could ride me all night.”

I grinned and put more work into those very leg muscles, increasing my rhythm as I rode him. “Like this?” His head fell back, that neck I’d been lusting over exposed. I leaned down and sucked it, tasting his salty sweat, inhaling his cologne. “This how you imagined it?” I whispered.

He released my cock and caught my face in his hands, pulling me in for a quick kiss. “Better. You feel so good, Zachary.”

I straightened and went back to pressing my palms against his chest. “Told you not to call me that.”

“Why can’t I? It’s a beautiful name.”

I didn’t answer. He stopped my hips with his hands.

“Why can’t I call you Zachary?”

“Because Corey always did.”

Duncan went still. Damn it, what was wrong with me? Talk about ruining the mood. I shouldn’t have said anything. But every time I heard the name I thought of Corey. Even my mother didn’t call me Zachary, Corey was the only one.

“And it makes you miss him?”

I scowled down at him. “No! I don’t miss him at all. He always called me that when he was losing patience with me. It makes me think of his annoyance and that reminds me of all the stupid things I did back then.”

“Oh. Well we can fix that.”

Duncan dove up, grabbed me, and flipped me over. His cock slipped out of me, but he quickly spread my legs with his knees, lifted one of them, then guided himself back in. I laughed, then moaned when he started thrusting against me. “This is fixing it?” I gasped.

“Zachary,” he whispered. “Remember this instead.”

He pinned my arms over my head and I gasped as he started humping me so hard my entire body jerked. I loved it, a little rough but blasting all the right places inside me.

“I won’t call you that in the future if you don’t like it,” he huffed as his hips snapped. “But tonight I want to say it. Zachary. I want you to come, Zachary.” He rose to his knees and held my leg up, then gripped my cock and started pumping into me even harder, his neck muscles straining with the effort, and my orgasm hit me like a bomb had detonated.

“Oh, fuck, Duncan!”

“That’s it, Zachary. Come hard for me.”

I think my eyes crossed, his voice pulling the climax out of me harder as ecstasy traveled up my ass and out my cock. I think I even felt it in my feet, and my toes curled as I whimpered, edging over the peak and tumbling down the other side.

“Oh fuck,” Duncan whispered, then collapsed on top of me, our sweaty skin gliding together, his head dropping onto the pillow beside mine.

“Oh fuck is right,” I said, my heart drumming. “I came so hard.”

“Good.” His fingers stroked my face. “Remember that, Zachary.”

I chuckled, because holy shit, mission accomplished. I doubted I’d ever again hear my full name without thinking about this.

Duncan jolted up and went to the bathroom. He returned moments later and cleaned me up with a hot towel. “You okay there?”

“That was…holy hell,” I said as I caught my breath. “That wasn’t sex, that was like therapy.”

Duncan chuckled and slid down onto the mattress, lying on his back. “Therapy never worked that way for me, I must not have been paying enough.”

I turned my head to look at him. “I can’t imagine you ever needing therapy.”

“No?”

“You’re weird, but you’re also pretty much the most together person I know.”

“Thank you. But I’ve gone through my lost periods. Back when I was your age.” He shifted onto his side, brown hair sweat-soaked, eyes drowsy. “When I didn’t know where my life was going.”

“Ah. I can relate to that.”

“I thought you might. Speaking of unexpected directions, this is not how I expected this night to go when I showed up here.”

I smiled, and that’s when something dawned on me for the first time. “Hey. You trucked ass over here to find me after Barry told you I quit. You did that instead of just calling.”

“I wanted to look you in the eye. I buzzed your apartment. When you weren’t here I waited outside for an hour.”

I sat up. “An hour you waited for me?”

Duncan sat up and eased back against the wall. “That’s right. So I apologize for being rude to you out on the street, but I’d been stewing for a while.” He chuckled. “I was angry but I was also worried. Trying to figure out what your motivation was for quitting.”

“Okay.” I studied his eyes. “Can’t say that explains why you accused me of advertising my body.”

“Oh. That.” He winced. “Like I said, I apologize.”

“Why did you say that? About my shirt being too tight. Were you just lashing out at me? Because you know how I feel about being treated like…like there’s something shameful about me.”

Duncan groaned and rubbed his eyes. “I know. I shouldn’t have said that, Zach. I didn’t mean it. It wasn’t about you.”

“You called me confusing before. You’re confusing too, for the record.”

He dropped his hands in his lap. “I don’t want you to think I’m this creepy older guy chasing after you.”

“I don’t. You’re not creepy, and you sure as shit haven’t been chasing after me. Quite the opposite.”

“I didn’t know you got a new job, and that you were dressed for work, all right? When you were out so late then came home dressed like that, I figured you were off with some man. I was already worked up, so I just added that to the list of things bothering me. Again, I’m sorry.”

I shifted so we were facing each other. “You saying it would bother you if I was with another man?”

“It was a kneejerk reaction, I have no claim on you, Zach. No right to jealousy. I’ve had someone else in my bed since I was with you.”

My heart sank, then an old, familiar companion bubbled up, and its name was anger, its sidekick jealousy close behind. “Who? Who was in your bed after me?”

“It doesn’t matter who.”

“What happened to ‘I have nothing to hide’ and all honesty, Duncan?”

“Things are different now.”

“It was Greg, right? Did you sleep with Greg?”

“Zachary…”

“Don’t call me that, we’re not fucking right now.”

His eyebrow cocked, and he smirked at me.

“Oh, you’re amused?”

“Yes.” He reached out and gripped my chin. “Extremely amused.”

I tried to resist the Stengel smirk, but a grin was trying to curve my lips. “It isn’t funny.”

“You jealous over me? Trust me. It’s funny.” He rolled his eyes and a laugh escaped me before I could stop it. “See? It’s funny,” he said. “You’re laughing.”

“I’m laughing because of your face, Duncan.”

Duncan’s head fell back and he laughed long and hard. “Thanks, Zach.”

“You’re right. I’m jealous. Who was in your bed after me?”

He laughed harder and shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. I only mentioned it to make the point that I had no right to behave the way I did when I saw you dressed that way. I’ve got no business acting like I have a say in what you do.”

“You wouldn’t be laughing if your nephew had told you what a nightmare I can be when I’m jealous. I’m both annoying and pathetic, but I’m tenacious.”

Duncan grabbed my hands and tugged me closer, leaning his face into mine. “You want to feel less pathetic?” he asked in a whisper, like we were sharing a secret.

“Yeah, if that’s possible.”

“I, am jealous of…” He poked my chest with his finger. “You, and my nephew. I wish I’d met you first.”

I tried to hide my grin but a chuckle escaped.

“Try not to look so pleased, I’ve just prostrated myself and shown you one of my flaws.”

“You realize you have no reason to be jealous of him.”

“When has jealousy had anything to do with reason? I have no reason to be messing around with someone your age either, but here I am.”

“You’ve never been with someone younger?”

“Not more than a few years younger. Have you ever been with someone this much older?”

I shook my head. “No.” I grinned. “But I like it.”

He pulled me in so my legs were resting on his thighs. “I like it too.”

“Can we see each other again after this?”

His lips parted and his eyes flicked over my face. “Do you want to?”

“Yeah. I really do.”

He smirked. “You could come back to work.”

“We talked about that already.”

Duncan sighed. “All right. But the job is open for you indefinitely.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.” He grabbed my face and kissed me. “You can return any time, that’s a promise. And I hope you will.”

“Thank you, I’ll think about it. But I wasn’t talking about seeing you at work.”

“What did you mean then?”

I gave him a pointed glare. “Come on, Duncan. You know what I mean.”

“Are you saying you want to date me?” His crow’s feet wrinkled as his expression became disbelieving.

“Wow. Is it that bad an idea?”

“I just hadn’t imagined you’d ever want that with me.”

“Why?”

Duncan shrugged. “Well, you told me about how long it’s been since you dated, and the last person I’d expect you to break your fast on is me.”

“You knew you were the first person I’d had sex with in ages, you mentioned my celibacy that night in the pool.”

“So you mean you want to fuck me more.”

“Yeah. But also…date you.”

“Well.” His brows rose. “This is unexpected.”

“Hey, listen, I’m not gonna beg. My begging days are behind me. If you don’t want to, just say no. I can handle it.”

“Bring the energy down a notch, Zachary, I’m taking a moment to catch up. I’m old, remember?”

I grinned with my lips pressed together, enjoying the banter but nervous now that I had laid it out there. “Do you not enjoy spending time with me, talking, when your cock’s not in my ass?”

He chuckled. “I enjoy that very much. I’ve enjoyed your company from the moment we met, when you were swearing and sassing Corey. I like you.”

I shrugged. “I like you too. I want to hang out more.”

“If I date you it would be more than just ‘hanging out’. I do know how to romance someone, Zach, so don’t let my recent fumbling make you think otherwise.”

“Then romance me,” I said, leaning in and giving him a quick kiss.

He pinched my chin, smiling. “People will talk.”

“Probably.”

“You don’t care?”

I shook my head. “Nope. We’re both adults, and I don’t work for you anymore.”

“We have…connections.”

“You’re worried about Corey.”

He shrugged. “A little. Are you worried about him?”

“Please. He’s getting married. And there’s no rule saying you can’t date a relative of your ex. If you think someone should talk to him, that should be you. I’ve been out of his life a long time.”

I felt like we were negotiating a diplomatic contract here. I supposed it was the grownup way to handle it. But it kind of took the wind out of my sails, that he had these reservations. I went back and forth between thinking Duncan wanted me even more than I imagined, and thinking he felt cornered now and wanted to flee. And yeah, I was still thinking about who had been in his bed last, but I tried not to. We weren’t pledging monogamy here. I had to reel this fish in carefully.

“All right.” Duncan slid his arms around my back and pressed his forehead to mine. “In that case, I’m going to date the fuck out of you, Zachary.”

A soft laugh huffed out of me, but I was swooning inside. “That sounds great.”

“But now I have to go to sleep.”

“Because you’re old?”

“Yes, Zach. Because I’m old.” He hit me with a pillow. “I’m assuming I can spend the night here?”

I peeled the sheet back and held it up for him to climb under. He sidled up next to me and I gave him my back, letting him spoon me. “Good night, Duncan.”

He squeezed me tight, then relaxed. “Good night.”

Duncan’s body was comforting against mine, but sleep didn’t come easily. I was happy, but I took a moment to acknowledge the strangeness of it. The agony of the past month, not knowing what the hell was going on. Culminating in this, the man I wanted, right here in my bed. I was going to be dating Corey’s uncle, and that almost made a giggle erupt. I tried to imagine Corey’s reaction if Duncan told him. Corey would make that face like he’d smelled something bad. He might even try to talk Duncan out of me, thinking I’d be as big a problem for his uncle as I had been for him.

But I didn’t think that would deter Duncan. I’d been forthcoming about myself, my past mistakes, and my efforts to correct them. Shit, at least I hoped Duncan didn’t let anyone talk him out of it. I hoped he didn’t talk himself out of it.

Because I had a feeling dating the fuck out of Duncan Stengel was gonna be a wild ride.