Chapter 5
Marnie laid in bed, thinking about the date she had with Nathan. Everything in her made her wish he had stayed. She knew they made the right decision to end their evening but couldn’t help feeling like they had somehow cheated each other out of some kind of fulfillment they had been missing. What’s to say if they had slept together it wouldn’t have finally solidified what they were, or at least set it stone what they were hoping to be?
She got up out of bed and opened her window to the sunlight of the morning. She had no plans for the day and decided she might as well get up and get out the house. It had been a long time since she visited her goddaughter and her family. Actually, she hadn’t been back to see them since she helped birth their first child.
After a quick shower and tossing on some clothes, her phone notified her she had gotten a message. She picked it up from the nightstand in her bedroom to see it was from Nathan:
Good Morning, beautiful.
Marnie had to smile at those words. Even though she knew Nathan wasn’t like the men she had been involved with before, she was worried since she didn’t sleep with him maybe he would do as others had; drift away from her. She responded.
Good morning handsome ;)
On her way out the door, she read one more message he sent her shortly after her own that stopped her dead in her tracks:
I couldn’t stop thinking about you last night. Can we meet again, tonight maybe?
Marnie’s grin widened on her face as she replied, letting him know she’d love that. On the way to her car, the sun never seemed brighter and she never felt lighter at heart.
*****
Nathan had finally received correspondence back from his lawyers as well as Hilary’s that their divorce had been finalized and all assets settled. Hilary would receive spousal support for the next five years at Nathan’s request—in spite of his lawyers’ protest—but he didn’t feel bitter about the separation. From the beginning, he found ways to make peace with what he knew was his hand in driving the two of them apart. The divorce after that became just a definite expectation. What Nathan wasn’t expecting was for his phone to ring that morning as he lay in bed.
He saw it was Hilary. His brow furrowed as he answered it. “Hilary?”
“Good morning, Nathan.” Her voice had a peaceful softness to it that he hadn’t heard in several years; maybe fifteen or more to be honest. “How are you this morning?”
“Doing good,” he responded hesitantly. “What about you?” There was a long pause, then a sigh came from the other end of the phone.
“We’re finally free, aren’t we,” Hilary said solemnly.
Nathan reflected on her words for a moment before responding. “Yeah, Hil. Yeah, we are.”
“I just wanted to let you know,” she said. “I am grateful and thankful you signed the divorce papers. It took some time for me to assure myself once I reached Colorado that it was the best choice.”
Nathan listened, wondering where this conversation was leading. He never figured she was having a hard time with their marriage being over, at least not by the way she had planned everything and put the wheels for the divorce in motion. Then again, she was always the planner in their relationship and the one who would then execute said plan, whether it was a barbecue, a holiday event, or just a night out.
“I’m glad we went through with it, too,” he said into the phone. In saying these words, his mind instantly went to Marnie.
“I also called to let you know, after my lawyer received the signed papers, and I saw your signature, this huge amount of release and peace came over me. I took it as a sign that you are going to be ok, and me too.”
Nathan could tell by her voice that she must be smiling on the other end of the phone. He hadn’t heard her sound so calm and so…happy. He couldn’t help but smile too now that he could see what she was getting at.
“Yeah, we’re going to be okay, Hil.” He smiled. Part of Nathan wondered did part of this innate knowing she spoke of come from seeing him on some leaked video or paparazzi photo with Marnie? He could easily see Hilary laughing at the sight of him dancing or frolicking like a kid and being glad for it. She always fussed at him playfully that he was so serious and not nearly as fun as when they first dated back in college.
“Just…” she began. “Be good, Nathan. Be good, and be happy. If you need anything, I’m just a phone call away.”
“Same here, Hil. You take care there in Colorado. Be careful, okay?”
Their phone calls ended with heartfelt well-wishing and even optimism. Nathan couldn’t have ever predicted that. It brought back to his mind the tarot reading that Marnie had done for him. He thought of the two of cups, with the two people working together as a team and with full cooperation. It was in the placement of the card spread that indicated it was someone that was unforeseen or at least would be unexpected to help or care. Nathan had to laugh at the thought and possible accuracy of that reading. Then, his thought went to the other card across from it: The Lovers. If the previous card represented his friendship with Hilary, then that one was no one other than Marnie.
This sudden realization made Nathan practically leap out of bed and began planning their date for the night. He was still in Kingston in a hotel, but a definite five-star one that had all the amenities and things he could use for a romantic night. His mind was made up without question that he wanted to express to Marnie that she meant more to him than someone he could wine and dine, or someone simply to sleep with. He would give her as much of his affection and time as he could and prove to her his intentions from that point on were sincere.
*****
Marnie returned from her visit with Dominique and her extended family. Their daughter was growing so big it seemed already, but there was a big change in this experience than last time. Marnie hadn’t left feeling unfulfilled in her own personal life like she often had before. No. She was almost home with a sense of joy. Rather than feeling like others had attained a sense of completion in family life and romance that she hadn’t, she was driving back to her own home looking forward to seeing Nathan again, and that brought her a huge amount of happiness. She may not have what others feel a woman should have at her age as it pertains to relationships, but she had something to look forward.
It wasn’t that she didn’t feel Nathan cared. He had made it obvious over nearly two months now that he did. Even after their date last night, she felt reassured that there was an element of caring there despite their agreeing to not be intimate so soon. That decision itself meant they valued what they had. That was something Marnie could never say of her previous relationships. None of them.
As she pulled up to her home and got to the front door, she saw something kind of wedged in the edge of it. It was an envelope. She reached and opened it. It was a card with a lace motif on the front and the words “sweetheart” in a cursive font. Marnie felt her whole face light up. She couldn’t help but wonder if he was going to hand deliver it and just found she wasn’t there. Was he disappointed or glad, so he could leave it as a surprise? She opened and read his handwriting:
Can’t wait to see you tonight! Have a lot of special things planned, but definitely more private.
Sincerely,
Nathan
She giggled aloud and went inside. Soon as she got in the door, she took out her phone and proceeded to message Dominique about what she found. Dominique immediately messaged her back that it sounded fun, with a winking emoticon. Marnie laughed and sent her a winking emoticon back in reply. Marnie had told her friend about the night’s previous events, and Dominique reassured her during their visit at her niece’s home that it still sounding promising that Nathan and herself were being more mindful of each other’s hearts as well as their own and that was a very good thing.
Marnie had to admit, if it weren’t for the support Dominique had given her from the start she would have either given up on Nathan a long time ago and been headed right for another train wreck of a relationship with someone else, or she would have jumped head first into bed with Nathan and regretted it. She had never been more thankful for her friendship with Dominique at this point in her life.
After a quick message to Nathan that she thought his card was cute and sweet—with him responding with an equally sweeter message—Marnie proceeded to start looking through her wardrobe for something to wear. Any other time she would pick something flashy and provocative, but she felt differently about tonight.
The paparazzi hype of her involvement had died down and she didn’t feel the need to go too overboard in her attire anymore. She had to laugh at her own realization that she had always been about turning heads, and her involvement with Nathan kicked that sense of “diva-ness” into overdrive. Now, she just simply wanted to wear something romantic and restrained but still flattering. She wanted her clothes tonight to reflect that it was about her and Nathan, and not anyone else’s perceptions about them. He hadn’t exactly given the details earlier of what their date would consist of but made it clear in his message it would be in a more private setting. She hoped to show her appreciation more than she had last night.
When Nathan arrived later that night, he was dressed in a simple black short-sleeved men’s shirt that buttoned down the front, and black slacks. When Marnie opened her front door, she had to laugh as she had settled on a black form fitting thigh-length dress, with matching black heels.
“We look like we’re going to a funeral,” she chuckled.
“Do we?” Nathan asked with a grin.
Marnie nodded and gave Nathan a quick kiss on the lips. Rather than having on her standout red lipstick, she went with a tinted gloss. She wore her hair down, and although her dress was tame, her hoop earrings were a bright red as was her beaded necklace.
They got on their way back to Nathan’s hotel, talking on the ride about what their day had been like thus far and how they both agreed they needed this time together after last night. They made the kind of small talk and jokes you hear comfortable couples make and neither one of them thought anything of it.
As they pulled up, a chauffeur took Nathan’s car to park and the two of them made their way inside the five-star resort hotel. The lobby had a bar full of people who seemed like the type Nathan would be more familiar with than Marnie. Although she made note of it, she didn’t feel like she and Dominique had felt coming to places like this before. She barely thought of anyone’s perceptions of her and Nathan together or any judgments anyone could have of who this “mystery” woman was on the arm of Nathan Gladwell. In fact, there were no cameras out hoping to capture a glimpse of the two of them as they crossed the immense lobby to the nearest elevator, and they both were glad of it. There hadn’t been a lot of that lately, and that was the irony of this date being a “private affair.”
On the way up to Nathan’s floor, he reached over and held her hand, stepping closer to her and giving her playful kiss on the cheek. After that kiss, she turned her face to him and they snuck in another peck on the lips, before the elevator sounded that they had reached their destination. What the elevator opened up to was the biggest shock that Marnie did not see coming. Instead of it opening up as she would expect to the floor that led to Nathan’s room, it opened up into what looked like an entire luxurious living space. It was then that it dawned on Marnie that Nathan had taken her up to the very top suite of the hotel!
“Nathan,” she said in awe. “What on Earth? Are you staying here?!”
He rubbed her across her back and chuckled. “I am tonight. I had them upgrade my room earlier this morning so we could have the presidential suite for tonight.”
Marnie turned to look at him wide-eyed and surprised, and all she could do was burst into excited giggles. She began letting her eyes go back to scanning the suite as they stepped out of the elevator. The floor was white marble with black and silver elements in its imperfections.
The décor was a fusion of contemporary and modern, with stainless steel appliances in the kitchen on the immediate left, that overlooked a massive black marble bar top. Their barstools were black leather with chrome finish on the legs. It was an entirely open floor plan with the exception of a short hall that lead to a master retreat that seemed like it was the size of Marnie’s entire house. The bedroom had its own seating arrangement and a California king sized bed that still left more than enough room in the massive space.
As Nathan guided her from one space to another showing her all the many luxuries that they had to themselves, her eyes went back out to expansive pool area beyond the main living room space. He kindly opened the glass door and made a gesture for her to step out before himself.
Marnie’s eyes sparkled at the view of the city lights of metropolitan Kingston. The huge pool was lit so it gave a dreamy blue glow to the terrace and next to it was a table with a white tablecloth, perfectly set for two. She turned to Nathan who was now standing directly behind her. His face said it all, that he had planned everything for this night to be special for the two of them. She threw her arms around him.
“Oh Nathan, it’s beautiful,” she exclaimed. He tightened his hug around her.
“I'm glad you like it. I definitely wanted to make up for the other night, and unfortunately, I’m not that great at planning so everything is always kind of last minute,” he laughed.
She took her arms from around his neck and looked into his eyes. “Oh no, it's perfect, last minute or not,” she assured him. He gave her a relieved grin and another kiss. Their whole night had been filled with kisses so far, and Marnie could only hope there were more to come.
Shortly after Nathan received a notification on his phone that the room service he ordered was on its way to their suite. When it arrived, the attendant had them both sit at the table and began unveiling a meal of roasted quail with rose sauce, and corresponding side dishes that were equally aromatic and unique. Neither one of them had had any of the dishes presented and were delighted at the variety. Their love for food had always been present over the nearly two months they had come to know one another, so this was a perfect addition to this evening of surprises.
During their meal to which they oohed and awed over each taste, Marnie couldn’t help but wonder if this was what she had been missing all the times she settled in her previous relationships. It wasn’t the question of if she had missed out on the decadence of expensive dining and luxuries locales, but just someone treating her with respect and showing her that they felt she was worthy of good experiences that didn’t always involve taking off her clothes.
“You know,” she began, “I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone put forth this much effort or time for me before.”
Nathan looked up from his plate. “Never? I mean, I know it’s a bit extravagant but—“.
She shook her head. She could still feel Nathan’s eyes on her as she continued eating. What did he think about her in that regard? Did he feel a sense of pity she had maybe not valued herself more in her past or was it regret that maybe they hadn’t met earlier in life in some way? When she looked back up to at him, his eyes were back looking down again. The awkwardness went away when he spoke again.
“Well, I’m glad that I could be the one to treat you better than the others,” he said as he looked up to her again across the table. “I’m actually glad to share special things like this with you than with any of the women in my past,” he added. With that, they decided to lift their glasses of champagne with a toast to their present lives and to well-worn pasts that brought them together.
After dinner, Nathan had another surprise. He had left Marnie in the living room of the suite while arranged some things in the master retreat. She was excited but patient as she sipped on some more champagne. It wasn’t long after that Nathan returned to the living room, a white terry cloth robe draped over his arm and a sneaky grin on his handsome face.
Marnie raised an eyebrow as she looked over her glass. She lowered it after a sip and asked, “What’s that for?”
“You’re massage awaits, madam,” Nathan said taking an exaggerated bow.
She burst into surprised laughter, and then stood up to make her way to the bedroom.
When she entered the bedroom, Nathan closed the door behind the two of them and she looked over her shoulder giving him a coy smile. He smiled, handed her the robe, and turned his back to let her disrobe. After she had taken off everything and replaced her nudity with the soft robe, she let him know he could turn around.
“If I would’ve been thinking,” he nervously chuckled, “I would have given you a towel instead. I need that to be more wrapped around your chest than on your arms.”
“Oh,” she replied. With that said, she shimmied the robe down enough to slide her arms out and hold the robe around her chest, her eyes locked on Nathan all the while.
Marnie was more excited than she was letting on. The thoughts of what was put on pause between them the last time they were alone together at her house came back to her mind. She laid across the bed, resting her head on her left arm across a pillow.
She noticed Nathan’s smile as he approached her. On the nightstand to left of the bed appeared to be a container of scented massage oil. Goosebumps of excitement rippled across Marnie exposed back. She heard what sounded like Nathan removing his buttoned up shirt. It was confirmed when she saw it land beside the bed onto the floor. He was careful to not put his full weight atop her as he slightly straddled across her legs. This wasn’t the most romantic positioning for a massage but would do.
Marnie watched as his arm reached just above her head to grab the bottle of scented oil from the night stand. The anticipation was making her feel everything but relaxed. The sudden sensation of warm oil hitting her bare naked back didn’t help either. It only intensified her already heightened emotions. He noticed her jump a little.
“Was that alright? It’s not too hot or cold is it?” he asked concerned.
Marnie couldn’t help but laugh. “No! It’s fine.”
Nathan sat the bottle back on the nightstand, and begin gently spreading the oil across Marnie’s skin in wide sweeping motions. He massaged it into her shoulders and then down the center of her back. She let out a comfortable sigh and soon found herself closing her eyes.
She couldn’t believe they just met a few months ago, were two strangers trying to figure out what to do concerning themselves, love, life. Now here there were in a beautiful space, close, intimate, and so comfortable with one another. She realized it really had been so long since she allowed that type of vulnerability with anyone. It was long overdue, and she was glad it was with someone like Nathan. He was soft at heart, and even though his appearance was quite the contrary he was very apt to be broken by someone like Marnie. She couldn’t fathom that now.
While Marnie’s thoughts were reflecting on everything that had led her and Nathan to this place in their relationship, Nathan had been massaging her lower back with an attentiveness and skill that showed deep care for her, even appreciation. She could almost feel his eyes watching not only her reaction but admiring all that made her who she was. Nathan wasn’t one for flattery, even though he always found ways to pay her sweet compliments. This was probably the best way for him to express how he truly felt; by using very few words at all.
“I hope I’m not doing this too hard,” he said, letting his hands glide back up to her neck and carefully knead there a while.”
Marnie’s approving sigh told him all he needed to know.
The more she relaxed, Marnie was almost certain she could fall asleep right there on the spot. She hadn’t been pampered before, at least not like this. Her thoughts kept going back to how she had never imagined someone as good looking, kind, or from such a different walk of life than her own would ever see any value in her, considering how few men in her own neck of the woods had.
Her train of thought was quickly broken when she felt Nathan lean forward and bring his lips close to her left ear.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more beautiful sight than you trusting me.”
Marnie giggled at his words. “What do you mean?”
“There’s been a lot of times I felt like you maybe didn’t trust me,” he explained. “Times where I could tell you might be inside your own mind about the past.”
Marnie had no real answer to that. Although it was true, she knew there were times her thoughts weren’t on whether she trusted Nathan or not, but whether they were falling love or not. How would things turn out if they fell in love but the trust wasn’t there?
“Well, I guess the biggest question is do we trust each other?” she mumbled.
She felt Nathan’s hands pause, then Nathan let out a deep sigh. “I trust you, Marnie, maybe more than I should.” He laughed. “Do you trust me?”
She thought about it for a moment. She did. She did truly trust Nathan. Rather than just tell him, she decided showing him was a much better move. She shimmied a little underneath him and he finally got the impression she wanted to reposition herself. It was obvious he was a bit confused seeing she hadn’t answered his question, but when he realized she was trying to turn over to face him without holding on to the robe to cover herself, he understood.
Marnie looked up into Nathan’s eyes, and for a moment he just stared back. Then his eyes quickly glanced at her bare breasts, and back up gazing at her again. She smiled, and then slowly began moving her legs to slide them from underneath Nathan to around him one by one. He was more than happy to allow her to get more comfortable as a coy grin came across his lips.
The robe still covered her lower half despite Nathan being between her legs. Her breasts were high, nipples erect and pointing upward. She could see in his eyes he wasn’t just admiring the view beneath him but the woman it was all attached to. He looked at her eyes again as if searching for approval or reassurance that it was okay, that all walls were removed between them. Marnie gave him another one of her sweet, soft smiles. She wanted him closer and no words were necessary to make that point clearer.
Nathan watched as his own hand tentatively glided between Marnie’s breasts and right above her heart. She was almost certain he could feel it beating wildly beneath his fingers. His eyes met hers again as her chest rose and fell, her breathing steady but her lips parted in anticipation. All Marnie could think of was his hand gliding up to her neck and caressing her there, how he was being so soft, so observant of her reaction to his touch. His hand slowly made it's way back down her chest, his eyes following as if he were admiring a marble statue and its smoothness.
He finally had made his way to her left breast and his fingers gently brushed across her taut nipple. The sudden sensation of his touch on that sensitive tip sent a rush of heat throughout Marnie. It was like flipping on a switch jettisoning electricity all over her skin. She let a small gasp and her breathing sped up.
He grabbed her whole breast carefully in his right hand and massaged it. Marnie’s eyes slowly closed and her breathing became a deep close-mouthed moan. The next thing she felt was the rush of cool air across her stomach and thighs as Nathan removed the robe from across her; the only barrier between them. She looked up at his face and in the short moment, her eyes had been shut, his expression changed from one of fascination to utter desire.
Nathan laid himself completely on her and kissed her with far more tenderness than she expected. His lips felt like they were discovering and navigating just a much as his hand had been. The thought of exploring her whole body with that much attention sent her desire to heights she’d never known. She’d never had anyone appreciate her, not even in the sexual sense.
His tongue didn’t swish and flash back and forth with hers, it danced, tasted. His lips were feeling for hers as their hands worked together to remove Nathan’s pants. They were not rushing to this lovemaking, they were swimming toward it.
The pants and his boxers were far down enough that Nathan leaned to the side and further remove them. He broke his kiss with her but only for a moment, then his lips eagerly returned as quickly as his hips did to their place between her thighs.
They were now skin on skin completely, with the exception of his undershirt. She wanted no boundaries. None. She had built up so many emotional walls and if they were crashing down all others had to fall. That thought caused her to nearly snatch his undershirt up and over his head with so much ferocity it was in complete contrast with the rest of the movement.
“I trust you, Nathan. I do.” She breathed against his lips between kisses. “I do.”
Face-to-face, their eyes were all they could see. Marnie did not want to blink. She wanted that connection to be implicit and unshaken between them. Their eyes remained watching as she felt Nathan shift his weight forward and perfectly slide inside of her. He was hard as stone and she could tell he was taking the time to just feel that initial rush of feeling her. Their mouths touched but did not kiss. They breathed into one another, and Nathan rolled his hips forward finally letting his complete length crash into Marnie.
Marnie’s eyelashes fluttered as she inhaled sharply. She could not have imagined how good he would feel. No fantasy she had did him justice. On her exhale, he moved his hips back then forward again. He was still taking his time but with an intensity and intention. It was then she knew he wanted their boundaries out of the way as much as she did. He wanted her to know him and feel him with as much depth physically as he had to give emotionally.
He leaned down to her left ear letting his whole body rest carefully on hers, his chin above her shoulder. As she listened to his breathing, his hips kept the tempo like a dance. With every motion of him inside her and then away again, she felt herself falling deeper and deeper for him. She had been holding back so much for so long out of fear. She had played the role of the lone fox to protect herself from the next man that came along. But she wanted love, always. And tonight Nathan was giving it to her.
She found her hips now rocking along with his. She had never felt so warm, so wet and throbbing with anyone. Even with others, she held back everything, but with Nathan, she was letting go, and she loved it. He paid attention and started to roll hips into her faster.
Lifting his chest slightly and moving ‘til her eyes level with his chin, he was giving her the whole length of himself over and over again. He was no longer selfishly enjoying her for his own pleasure but making it crystal that he was all hers.
His moans matched her own. They were vulnerable, unhinged sighs of delight, and Marnie couldn’t hold them back. Neither could Nathan. The throbbing and tightening around his hard, solid cock inside her sent her crashing into an orgasm. She was nearly in tears it felt so good, but he didn’t stop. He lifted his chest higher, hooking his right arm under left leg and leaning his body just slightly more left. He plunged deeper and harder, over and over. Marnie heard her own voice shout “yes.”
His continuous moans in her ear at his own orgasm sent her spinning into her second one. The aching felt so good it was almost torturous. Her skin felt like the whole ocean had swept over her. Every cell seemed to scream aloud from every pore. When Nathan collapsed on her and released her leg from his grip, she finally realized she had a tear gliding down to her ear. What on Earth had she been doing all these years with lovers in the past? How much emotion had she held back in bed and outside of it?
She felt Nathan deliver little wispy kisses on her left shoulder, then on her neck. He nuzzled his nose there for a moment then let out one big huff of a breath. With her arms wrapped around him, she too let out a deep sigh. They laid there for a few more minutes, then Nathan must have realized he was probably pretty heavy and practically squishing her. He slid himself from between her thighs and carefully laid to her left in the bed.
The sensation of her bare skin being exposed to the room caused her to get up and pull back the covers. Nathan followed suit. Once under covers, she felt him wrap his arm around her and spoon up close. She heard him inhale deeply. Maybe he was smelling her hair, or maybe he just was winded from the way they made love. Neither reason mattered as far as she was concerned. What mattered was they finally made that huge divide between them go away. It wasn’t the sex alone but what they brought to bed that night that would make the difference in where they went from there.