Chapter 12

I’m ready to test out a theory. Come here and let’s see how hard my fist can hit your face.

-Max to Gabe

Ember

“Do my thighs look like they touch in these pants?”  I asked Gabe as he was walking out to the living room to start the coffee.

 

He stopped and turned, regarding my cautiously.  I was standing with my back to him in my new Rock Revival jeans.  They were a little tight in the thighs since I’d ordered a size smaller than I normally wear, especially in the thighs.  I’m sure he was trying to decide if he should answer honestly or not.

 

He still had the streak marks from the pillow creased on his face, and I had to try hard not to laugh.  He was wearing boxer briefs and a pair of socks.  He did weird things like that.  He said he didn’t like the feel of the sheets on his feet, so he always wore socks to bed.  His dog tags were dangling between his solid pecs.  His hair was an absolute mess.  My man could definitely pull off the sleepy look.

 

Reaching into my shirt, I pulled out my iPhone and snapped a quick picture.  He didn’t say anything though.  He must be thinking hard on what to say.

 

“Honestly, I could give a fuck if your thighs touch or not.  Mostly, I just care about your thighs when my head’s between them sucking you, or when my thighs are wedged between them and my cock is inside you.” 

 

Holy.  Shit.

 

 I think I just had a mini orgasm.

 

 “Good answer, baby,” I said to him.

 

He smiled and exited the room, going for the coffee that was his life force in the mornings.  I went ahead and finished getting ready, putting on shoes, a shirt, and throwing my hair up in a messy ponytail at the top of my head.  That was about all I could expend today.  My side was throbbing in tune with my heartbeats, and I really had no desire to put any more effort in than jeans and a t-shirt.  It was a deodorant only kind of day.

 

“How’re you feeling?”  Gabe asked from directly behind me, making me jump and then cringe.

 

“Sorry, baby,” he said before kissing the side of my head and shuffling to the bathroom.

 

I followed him in and watched him strip.  His backside looked like it was sculpted out of granite.  Smooth hard lines ran down his back, ass, and thighs.  He bent over to take his underwear off and I had a clear view of his balls hanging between his legs and his half-hard cock.

 

My mouth watered.  Damn the fact that I had such an early appointment time.  I was running late as it was, otherwise I would join him in the shower.

 

I watched as the muscles in his forearm, bicep, and shoulder flexed and relaxed with each forward and back motion as he brushed his teeth.  His eyes watched me in the mirror as I watched him.  Spitting and rinsing, he turned the shower on and stepped in without checking the temperature.

 

I shivered, but not because he didn’t check the temperature, but because of the water running down his defined chest and abs.  He was beautiful.

 

“If you don’t knock it the fuck off, I’m gonna have you on your knees with my cock in your mouth,” Gabe ground out.

 

My eyes went wide, but not in indignation.  I actually wanted to do it. 

 

He finished washing the soap out of his hair and off his body, turned off the water, and then stepped out.  All the while, his eyes were on me.  He was no longer half-hard.  No, he was completely hard.  His skin stretched over his cock tightly.  The veins that ran along his penis stood out starkly.  The head was slightly purple in color, and I longed to have him in my mouth. 

 

He stalked towards me and took my mouth in a rough kiss.  His large hand curled around the bottom of my jaw, cupping my chin, and held my face in place while he devoured my mouth.  He backed me up against the wall, and I took that as my cue and dropped to my knees in front of him. 

 

Reaching up with my hand, I gently cupped his balls.  His sharp indrawn breath made me smile right before I took him in my mouth.  I went as deep as I could go before withdrawing.  I worked him like an ice-cream cone.  Traced the veins on his cock with my tongue.  He lost the struggle with his hands and one went to the ponytail that gathered my hair, and the other went to the wall behind me.

 

Guiding his cock back into my mouth, he used his grip on my hair to set the pace that would get him off the quickest.  In and out, he thrust, trying to keep it shallow so he didn’t gag me.  I was having none of that though.  Grabbing a hold of his thighs, I pulled him forward, harder, until he hit the back of my throat.  I swallowed, and heard him hiss.  This was turning me on beyond belief, so I unsnapped the buttons of my jeans and snuck my hands into my panties.

 

Finding my clit, I started rubbing it in circles.  I looked up and caught Gabe watching my progress down below.  His eyes were like blue fire as he watched me rub my clit, as well as his cock tunneling into my mouth.  His eyes made contact with mine and I lost it. 

 

My orgasm burst forth and I moaned around his cock, which set him off too.  Come splashed into my mouth, and I swallowed convulsively.  He eased from my mouth with a soft pop, and I licked my lips and smiled at him.

 

“Fuck that was hot,” Gabe panted.

 

I smiled, and reached my hands out for him to help me up.  He obliged, and then buttoned my pants for me. 

 

“I’ve got to go, I’m super late.  Max is taking me, right?”  I asked him as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

 

“Yeah, baby.  I’m sorry I’m not going, but we have a small amount of time left to finish this bike and get it registered, or the bike won’t make it to auction.  Call me when you’re leaving, I love you, Em,” he said before letting me go.

 

“Love you, more,” I said and then walked quickly out the door.

 

Max was on his cell phone, but quickly hung up when he saw me.  Helping me into the truck, he started it up and then took off towards the doctor’s office.  We parked in the parking garage and walked at a fast clip to the office, all the while not saying a word.  He hooked an arm around me once we reached the elevator doors and kissed me on the forehead.

 

“We’re lucky you made all the lights or we would’ve been late,” I said idly.

 

“That’s ‘cause I’m the man.”

 

“I’m sure that’s it,” I said, dryly, as I opened the doors to the office.

 

“I wasn’t here but a year ago with Cheyenne.  These nurses probably think I get around a lot,” Max whispered beside me.

 

“Don’t you?”  I asked sweetly.

 

“Well, yeah, but I don’t leave any evidence behind.”

 

“Ewww.  That’s just nasty.” 

 

“You know what’s nasty?  Hearing your sister have sex while you were innocently trying to play a war game.  That’s nasty.”

 

My face flamed and the receptionist watched us with curiosity after overhearing Max’s comment.

 

Rolling my eyes at her, we went to sit down.  Max being the ass he is sat two seats away from me.  He liked his elbowroom, and we’d played this game before, many times.  There was a TLC program on about giving birth, and I watched Max watch it with revulsion in his eyes.

 

His horror-filled eyes turned to me and said, “Don’t expect me to be in there with you.” 

 

“Of course I do.  You’re my only family.  I need you,” I stated simply.

 

I didn’t really, but there was no way I was letting him know that.  Terrorizing him was my favorite past time.  When he was in Iraq, I missed teasing him like crazy.  I felt empty without him, and very alone. 

 

When he was hurt, I went to pieces.  I cried for three days straight.  I couldn’t even go see him because they couldn’t tell me where they took him.  They didn’t know if he was all right, they only knew that the Humvee tripped an IED, and that Max sustained injuries.  It was truly the worst experience of my life.

 

Watching him now, you would never know he was ever even hurt.  He looked perfect.  Although, he’d go into his zones where he’d draw into himself.  Those times were hard because he would never tell me what was wrong.  We told each other everything, and it was tough when he didn’t trust me with those aspects of his life. 

 

“I really do need you, you know,” I whispered, so only he could hear.

 

His eyes went soft, and he moved to the seat beside me.  “I owe you an apology.  I know you’ve had it hard since mom and dad died.  I wanted to apologize for leaving you, and then for making you feel like shit after I came home.”

 

His words made my heart swell.  I hadn’t let myself contemplate it, but I needed to hear that he was sorry.  Sorry for leaving me alone when I our parents died.  Sorry for making me grow up so fast when I needed him so much.  He’d left me broken, and I’d never healed.

 

“That was a shitty thing to do.  Why’d you leave me when I needed you so much?”

 

“I was hurting, too.  I didn’t even think about you, to be honest.  I was in so much pain myself, that I buried myself in my career.  Took all that pain out on the enemies.  I should’ve come back, but I couldn’t forgive myself after I’d realized what I’d done.  Gabe succeeded where I couldn’t.  It was only after I got hurt in that Humvee that I let myself think about what I was doing.  I love you, Emmie.  Please forgive me.”

 

Everything he said was true, and who was I to judge for how he coped with losing our parents?  Everyone grieves a different way. 

 

Tears pricked my eyes, and I blinked rapidly to dislodge them.  “I know, Maxie.  I never held it against you.  I forgive you.  Will you buy me a new car to make up for it?”

 

He laughed, and the spell of sadness was broken. 

 

Thirty minutes later, I found myself on the scale.  I was two pounds lighter since yesterday.  Which didn’t surprise me since I ran on adrenaline and a prayer for a few hours yesterday afternoon.  The nurse showed us to a room, and I sat on the table while Max took the only available chair.  He surveyed the room, and quickly turned away from the model that showed a baby passing through a birth canal.

 

“I can’t wait for you to have a kid of your own.  You’re gonna end up having to deliver the baby all by yourself.  You’ll have to watch your wife’s vag stretch to the size of a melon.  It’s gonna be awesome.  I’ll video your reaction.”

 

“That’s absolutely disgusting.”

 

The appointment went about as expected.  We talked about risks, can-dos and can’t-dos.  He told me I wasn’t allowed to have sex in water.  No more than two cokes a day (that was one of the worst), and limited amounts of mercury.  While I listened with half an ear, Max looked like he was taking everything the doctor said to heart, memorizing it, and then storing it in the vault he called a mind.  Some of the things were so obvious that I wondered what type of person wouldn’t know that you shouldn’t chain smoke or drink whiskey.  Um, duh?

 

“Any questions?”  Dr.  Robinson questioned.

 

“Nope,” I answered.

 

We were out the door by 10:30 which meant I could still make it to McDonald’s before they stopped serving breakfast.  Score!

 

“I want an Egg McMuffin.”  I informed Max.

 

He nodded but didn’t answer, just pulled up into the nearest McDonald’s.  He ordered me a number one with a sweet tea, and himself a number one with two extra sandwiches.  The boy probably could down about two more, but he had a rule that he didn’t eat unhealthy if he could help it.  I, on the other hand, had a rule that I didn’t eat healthy if I could help it.

 

We’d just pulled up in front of the shop when I noticed the Audi.  It seemed vaguely familiar, but didn’t register who exactly it was until I heard her obnoxious voice.  It reminded me of nails on a chalkboard.  Just one of those voices that made you want to cringe.  She was standing toe to toe with Gabe, while Sam, James, and Elliott looked on.  It was apparent she’d been going at it for a while because all of the guys had beers in their hands that were half full.

 

Did I mention it was just past 10:30?

 

“You need to withdraw the suit.  Cora may be yours by blood, but you’re not her father.  Never were.”

 

Uh-oh.  Them’s fighting words.

 

Gabe’s face remained blank, but his words were anything but because they shot out of him like a whip.

 

“You better pray that your lawyer’s good.  I guaran-damn-tee you I’ll get her.  If you’re nice, you’ll still get to see her.  Have a nice day, Mrs. Moran,” Gabe said coldly.

  

Her face paled, and I was glad he’d never spoken to me like that or I would have broken down and cried.  Pulling my Egg McMuffin out of the bag, I sat down at Sam’s desk, propped my feet up, and started eating my food.  I watched, head turning back and forth like a cartoon listening to Gabe and Sidney argue.

 

“You can’t do this!”  She screeched.

 

“I can and will.  You cost me a year and a half of her life.  I don’t even know her fucking birthday.  I missed her first steps. Her first tooth.  Her first time crawling.  I’ve missed everything thanks to you.  How do you even live with yourself?”  He seethed.

 

“You were never even home.  How was I supposed to know you’d want her?”

 

“I bought a fucking cradle for her before I even deployed the last time!  How does that say that I’m not interested?”  He yelled.

 

“You’re going to ruin everything if you pursue this.  He’ll leave me, and I won’t have any way to put a roof over your baby’s head,” she sneered.

 

“Good, because I have a roof.  She won’t need you anymore.  She’s gonna have my wife.  You’re gonna be nothing to her.  Do you hear me?  Nothing.”

 

“You can’t take her away from me!  I’ll leave the country before I allow you to have her.”

 

“Try it.  I dare you.”

 

Chills slithered like a snake down my spine when I heard Gabe’s tone of voice.  He was one scary motherfucker when he wanted to be.  She took two large steps back, so she was closer to my chair, and I heard what she probably meant for nobody to hear.

 

“I fucking told him this wouldn’t work.  You have ways of ruining everything.  That stupid prick,” Sidney muttered under her breath.

 

My brows slashed down in question.  What they heck did she mean that?  Who was this, her husband, or someone else?

 

“I think it’s time for you to leave.  We’re supposed to have the results from the DNA test in a few hours.  My lawyer’s drawn up papers to put into motion my visitation rights.  I’ll be having Cora with me by the weekend.”

 

That was news to me, but it also excited me.  I did feel that maybe he needed to spend some alone time with her, and I went through my plans for the weekend in my head.  I didn’t have anything planned.  Maybe Max and I could go and stay at the cabin.

 

The cabin was my parent’s favorite getaway.  When they needed some time to unwind, they would all go up to Hainseville, and stay in the cabin.  It was primitive.  There was no running water, nor working lights unless you had the generator running.  There were some 4-wheelers there last time I checked, but I hadn’t been on them in well over eight years.  The weekend before my parents died.

 

Deciding that would be a good plan, I typed up a text on my phone asking Max if he would go with me.

 

Me:  Can we go to the cabin sometime and stay for the weekend?

 

Max:  Sure.  I just got some lights and indoor plumbing installed. 

 

Me:  Since when?

 

Max:  Why are we talking like this when we are sitting next to each other?

 

Me:  Because we’re awesome.

 

Me:  You aren’t talking.

 

I saw Max glance at his phone, roll his eyes, and then lay the phone back in his lap.

 

Me:  Max

 

Me:  Maxie Poo.

 

Me:  Maximillian Horatio Tremaine.

 

Max:  Where did you get Horatio?  That’s not my middle name.

 

Me:  This is getting good.  What do you think he’s gonna do?

 

It was getting good too.  So good, I decided to tape it.  Good thing I did too, because she used that moment in time to slap the shit out of Gabe.  I was so stunned that she’d done it that it took me a few seconds to react.  One second I was leaning back in the chair and watching the drama unfold, and the next, I was grabbing the bitch by the hair.  I pulled my arm back, and propelled it forward, knocking her square in the eye.  She crumpled to the ground on her hands and knees. 

 

Yanking her by the hair, I very nearly dragged her until she got back on her feet and followed me out the door.  I let my grip on her hair loosen as I got to her car.  Leaning away from her, I watched as she straightened.

 

“I don’t care how upset you are.  You do not hit him again. EVER.  I swear to God, if I see or hear that you did that again you won’t eat solid food for a month.  Got it?”

 

She opened her mouth to say something, but then thought better of it.  Yanking open her door, she folded inside and slammed it behind her.  She did a pretty impressive burn out once she was in the street, and I wondered if I could ever do one of those in my POS car.  Probably not.

 

I turned around, startled to see the men of Free lined up behind me.  Every last one of them was wearing a shit-eating grin on their face.

 

“Excuse me while I finish my hash brown,” I said squeezing in between James and Sam.

 

Sam ruffled my hair as I walked past.  Everyone came back in except for Gabe, who I saw walk into the direction of his house.  I’d go check on him in a few minutes, but my guess was that he needed some time to calm down.

 

“I gotta say, Ember, it’s completely awesome when you do that hair-dragging thing.  Last year with Sam’s psycho, and then again with Gabe’s; it’s just truly a pleasure to witness,” Elliott said delightfully.

 

We shot the breeze for another twenty minutes before I deemed it safe to go in search of my soon to be hubby.  Ditching the boys, I walked into the garage and stopped dead when I saw the bike that was going up for auction.  It was absolutely stunning.  The motorcycle was polished.  The wheels gleamed.  The paint job was an American flag.  It looked like it’d been through one hell of a war with tatters swaying in the wind.  A hand reached up from beneath the ground as if seeking the flag to lie with him in his final resting place.  Written on the side in a beautiful script the words:  For Kayla.

 

My heart squeezed.

 

At the one-year mark of Dougie’s death, we went to the Arlington cemetery and decorated his headstone with flowers and flags.  Kayla drew a picture of her daddy in the sky with a stick figure Kayla blowing kisses at him.  She was very intelligent at the age of four, although, very quiet when you compared her to Janie.  We had a memorial service/wake for him at a local pub since that’s what he would have wanted.   

 

Everyone was having a good time when the idea to make a bike and auction it off at one of the biggest motorcycle rallies in the South came about.  Although, never in my wildest dreams would I have guessed it would look like this!  It was magnificent.  Fat tears splashed down my eyes when I thought about the reason this bike was made in the first place. 

 

At first, I was skeptical that a bike would be able to portray a person as fine as Dougie, but this bike resembled everything that he believed in and more. 

 

Two strong arms wrapped around my waist, and I sank back against the chest of the man I loved. 

 

“It’s beautiful.”  I told him.

 

“I think it turned out nice.  No one knew what we all planned.  Everyone just built off the previous man’s work.  When I got it, it was already a piece of art.  I just polished it up a bit.”  Gabe whispered against my hair.

 

We stood like that for a long while.  We stopped only when my side started to protest.

 

“I think I’m gonna go take a nap.  I’m exhausted.  I’m not going to do any laundry today, by the way,” I supplied before blowing him a kiss and walking towards the back door.

 

His laughter followed me out the door.

 

Cheyenne intercepted me on the way to Gabe’s, and she ended up coming over to keep me company.  Nevertheless, what we really did was both fall asleep in Gabe’s bed, and sleep the afternoon and evening away.

 

I woke disoriented.  I heard the murmur of men’s voices, but was too comfy to move.  I had my arms wrapped around Gabe’s pillow, and my face buried in it breathing deep before I felt movement at my back.  Looking down I noticed a skinny arm wrapped around my stomach, and snoring happening right behind my head.

 

“This is hilarious.,” Gabe whispered.

 

A soft chuckle followed this statement and Sam snorted, “Cheyenne’s drooling on Ember’s hair.” 

 

That wasn’t the first time it’d happened, and probably wouldn’t be the last.  I’d slept over at Cheyenne’s place, at least once a week, since we were sixteen.  Only recently had that slowed down.  Every single one of those times, I would wake up in this position.

 

“It’s like the snoring wars, Texas edition.”

 

Indignation flooded my body and I raised my finger and flipped both of them the bird.  Chuckles escaped them as I untangled myself from Cheyenne’s death clutch.  Gabe reached down and hefted me to my feet, and I made my way, groggily, into the bathroom.  I made quick work and zombie walked into the living room to find them both playing Call of Duty.  Rolling my eyes, I walked up beside Gabe and plopped down next to him.  I curled into his body, making it hard for him to work the controller.

 

He didn’t shrug me off though.  I stayed like this for ten minutes before they set the controllers down and started talking about dinner.

 

“Pizza.”  I muttered into Gabe’s arm.

 

Just then, Cheyenne walked into the room and made herself comfortable in Sam’s lap.

 

I must’ve fallen asleep again but I woke when the front door closed quietly, and the lovely aroma of Italian spices and pizza sauce filled the air.

   

Sitting up, I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and glanced at the clock.  Yikes.  It was already eight at night.  We’d slept the day away.  Cheyenne was knocked out on the couch so I threw a pillow at her and hit her in the face.

 

Grinning when she threw the pillow back at me blindly I said, “Wake up, homie.  Pizza’s here.” 

 

Walking into the kitchen, I sat at the table and started eating pizza directly from the box.  I had no clue where Sam and Gabe were, but it wasn’t long before Cheyenne joined me.  She grabbed us both a coke and we devoured an entire pizza between the two of us.  I let out a large belch that was followed shortly by Cheyenne’s slightly shorter one.  I beat her by at least three points.

 

“That was attractive,” Sam grunted as he walked in the door.

 

Her answer was to let another one rip, and I laughed.  Gabe followed behind Sam and started laughing when he heard her burp. 

 

“I’m good as long as she doesn’t fart.  Then I might be a little grossed out.”

 

“What, you haven’t farted in front of each other yet?”  Cheyenne asked.

 

Gabe glanced at me and said, “Not intentionally.”

 

 “What’s ‘not intentionally’ supposed to mean?”  I asked quizzically.

 

“Nothing,” he muttered and opened the pizza box.

 

I decided to let this slide for now.  It struck me as being one of those things you don’t want to hear in front of others.

 

“What happened to all the pizza?  Did y’all already put it in the fridge?”  Gabe asked.

 

“What do you mean?  We ate it all.  Wasn’t it ours?”  Cheyenne asked.

  

I concurred by nodding my head.

 

“No.  That was an extra-large!  How could y’all eat all that?  We only went outside for more beer.  Are y’all being serious?”  Sam asked.

 

“What did you want us to do?  We thought y’all took the other box outside, or wherever y’all went!”  Cheyenne squirmed uncomfortably.

 

“Oops,” I said.

 

Rolling their eyes, they sat back and drank their beers.  They were much better sports than we would have been.

 

“What time are we leaving this weekend?”  I asked them.

 

The rally in Tulsa started this weekend, and I couldn’t wait.  We’d never been to a rally before; we were excited to experience something new that our men loved so much.

 

“Probably Friday morning.  It’s going to take a while to haul the bike on the trailer.  So we’re gonna just go early so we’re not trying to rush,” Gabe explained.

 

Nodding my head, I made a note to myself to call the hotel to see if they could add one more day on to our stay.

 

Standing up, I went about making them a sandwich.  If I thought about it, I might feel somewhat bad that we ate an entire extra-large that could’ve fed two full-grown men.  Who was I kidding?  Why would they think an extra-large would be enough for four people?  Then again, it’s not their fault Cheyenne and I could eat like men.  Cheyenne got up and helped, seeing as I didn’t know what Sam liked. 

 

I wasn’t sure what Gabe liked either, but I took a wild guess that he would eat anything.  Therefore, I made him two huge sandwiches with turkey, ham, two kinds of cheeses, lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, mustard, and finally mayo.  My mouth watered as I looked at the finish product, how I could still eat was beyond me, but I’ve always been like this.  I can eat a full meal, and two hours later eat another.  My family called me a bottomless pit, and I had a feeling this pregnancy wasn’t going to be good for my figure.

 

I did pretty well on the sandwich.  The only thing he took off was the tomatoes.  Good to know.  Just as the last bite cleared his mouth, his phone rang.  Chewing quickly, he reached into his pocket and dug it out.  His expression tensed as he saw who was calling, and we all held our breath as we waited for the news.

 

“Hello?”  Gabe answered, licking the tips of his fingers free of mayonnaise.

 

He listened for a few minutes as expressions came and went on his face.  Nervousness, indecision, anticipation, hope, and finally savage joy.  A bright smile lit his face as he heard what I was assuming the lawyer, told him.

 

“That sounds wonderful.  When do I get to pick her up?”  He asked.

 

Nodding his head he said, “Okay.  Neutral is probably better.  How long do I get to keep her?”

 

“Okay, thanks for everything.  I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”

 

We all watched him as he processed the information he was given. 

 

Making eye contact with me he said, “She’s mine.  Not that we had any doubt.  We have to go pick her up Friday evening at her daycare parking lot.  They feel it’s best that we meet somewhere neutral for the first time.  I’ll get her until Monday morning, and then I’ll take her to her daycare.”

 

A smile broke out on my face when I jumped up and clapped my hands.  “That’s fucking great!  Cheyenne, we need to go shopping.  Like now.  That’s two days away.  WAIT!  We’re going to a bike rally on Friday!  Can we take a baby to a bike rally?”

 

We all sat silently thinking when Cheyenne said, “Well, we’re taking the twins.  They’re the same age, so what’s the problem here?”

 

That was true.  We were planning to ride there, but that would be out of the question when there was a baby involved. 

 

“Cheyenne and I can ride in the car with the kids.”

 

“Y’all don’t know how to drive a trailer.  James was going to drive it with the kids.  One more kid won’t make a difference.  I bet he’ll enjoy the shit out of this trip,” Gabe grinned evilly.

 

I ran into the bedroom, grabbed my tennis shoes, and then came back out. 

“Alright, let’s get going.  We have two hours until Target closes.”

 

Sam decided it was in his best interest to stay here.  Something about being allergic to Target.  On impulse, I grabbed my coupon binder before I headed out the door.  I wasn’t sure I would need it, but I brought it anyway.  Who could go to Target just for what you came for?

 

I think Gabe was secretly excited.  He didn’t out-right say it, but you could tell he was eager to buy something for her.  He didn’t let out one argument about not wanting to go shopping.  He was silent on the trip there, and only said something when asked a question.  When we actually got to the baby section, it was a different story.  He started piling crap in by the bucket load. 

 

“Gabe!  Why are you getting newborn?  We don’t even know what size she is.  Let’s focus on the main essentials like a bed, car seat, and some accessories.”

 

He gave me an “are you kidding me” look and continued to toss anything he liked in the buggy.  I didn’t interrupt him.  He looked like he was on a mission.  Not that he ever lost sight of me or let me get more than four feet away from him.  While he was busy buying junk, I was getting baby wash, towels, diapers, blankets, wipes, and on and on.  By the time we were finished and I pried the shopinator away from the baby section, we had two buggies full of baby stuff.  As well as tickets to get a crib and changing table, dressers, and a jungle gym.

  

We got up to the checkout and I started pulling out the coupons, my Cartwheel app, and bringing up my mobile coupons.  There was a line behind us, and they were all gawking at the price and the massive amount of shit we got.  Cheyenne walked off, because she hated being with me when I started arguing with the cashiers.  

 

The total rang up to nearly three thousand, and then I handed her the coupons.  One and two dollar coupons don’t seem like they would add up, but they most certainly do.  Especially when you combine them with store coupons.  The total went down nearly two hundred bucks.  Then I went to the mobile coupons, which brought it down another thirty dollars.  By this time, we had a crowd watching to see how much I could bring it down.

 

Gabe stood by fascinated.  Once all the manufacturer and store coupons and Cartwheel coupons were subtracted, the total was brought down by nearly five hundred dollars.  Now, tell me again, why does everyone bitch and complain when I just saved five hundred bucks just by being a couponer? 

 

There were a shit load of people behind us watching; they even clapped as we left.  It was wonderful to have someone be aware of my awesomeness.

 

“That was pretty fuckin’ awesome.  Do you do that all the time?”  Gabe asked as we made our way out to his truck. 

 

Cheyenne was knocked back in the front seat reading on her phone.  We started putting the junk into the truck, and I’d just loaded the last box of diapers when a Blue older model Chevy turned slowly into the parking lot.  The bass on the truck was thumping so hard the entire car was shaking.  It sounded awful, and I would’ve loved to make a comment to them but I was sure Gabe wouldn’t like that too much.

 

It was when I was getting into the truck that Gabe’s body covered my own.  He’d stepped in front of me and backed me up hard against the truck.  The car passed us though without incident.  My heart was pounding so hard I thought it was going to pop out of my chest.  Gabe herded me to the backseat and got me in without any further ado.  He took off out of the parking lot and we were on the highway in no time. 

 

Gabe clenched the steering wheel with one fist.  His knuckles were white; the veins pulsed on his arm and neck.  He was severely pissed, but I didn’t really understand why.  Nothing happened, and it seemed like a coincidence that they were even in the same parking lot as us. 

 

“Gabe, what’s the big deal?”  I asked.

 

He ignored me, so I tried again.

 

“They didn’t even see me.  Nothing happened.”

 

Still no answer, so I shut up.

 

We drove home in silence.  Cheyenne must have sensed the tension in the air, because she didn’t say a word either.  Gabe stopped in front of Cheyenne’s door and helped her out, walking her to the front door.  I decided to go drop in on Max.  I was thinking that Gabe needed a minute, so I’d let him unload all the shit since he decided to ignore me the entire way home.

 

Walking in Max’s front door, I closed it with a bang, not looking back to see if Gabe noticed or not.  Max was on the floor, back up against the couch.  He had the remote in one hand and a beer in the other.  In front of him on the coffee table was a slice of cake.  My mouth watered, and I looked at him.  He didn’t acknowledge me, but he knew who it was.  Plopping down next to him, I grabbed the fork and ate half of his cake. 

 

I longed for the other half, but I wasn’t going to eat all of his cake.  I knew how much he loved his sweets.

 

“What’s wrong, babydoll?”  Max asked finally.

 

“Gabe’s mad about seeing a skull in the parking lot of Target.  He ignored me all the way home, so I’m gonna ignore him for a while.  I’m letting him unload the truck while I sit here and ignore him.”

 

Giving me a sideways glance he said, “Sounds like a solid plan.  Let me know how it works out for you.”

 

It ended up working out better than I anticipated.  I sat there for three hours before falling asleep around one in the morning.  Max covered me up at some point, and I slept the rest of the night on the couch before waking up somewhere around five in the morning, with a bladder that was about to burst.  Once taking care of the awkward morning moments, I walked out into the cool morning air and headed to Gabe’s place.

 

Something must be wrong for him not to come get me.  I twisted the front knob and opened the door.  I found him sitting on the couch.  He was staring at the dark flat screen that hung on the wall.  His head turned and watched me cross the floor until I took up a seat across from him.  He stared into my eyes for long moments before he spoke.

 

“This isn’t going to work.  How do I do this with my little girl?  How do I put her into danger?  There’s no way to protect her with all this shit swirling around her.  Something’s got to give,” he said quietly.

 

My stomach sank as his meaning filtered through my brain.  He wanted me to leave.

 

“I understand.  You do what you have to do.”  My voice quivered.

 

He stood and stared down at me for a few long moments.

 

Walking towards the door he said, “I will.  I’m going for a ride to clear my head.  I’ll see you when I get back.”

 

He didn’t even give me a kiss.

 

The roar of his bike broke the silence of the morning.  He rode out of the back lot, and then around to the front.  I could track him in my mind.  In my mind’s eye, I saw him turn into the parking lot of the garage.  Stop at the front gate and put the code in.  Then he roared off down the street, taking my heart with him.

 

I knew what I had to do. 

 

Going to his bedroom, I packed all my things and loaded them into the car.  If I weren’t here anymore, he wouldn’t have to worry about his baby.  If I weren’t here, she wouldn’t be in danger.

 

I decided the best thing to do was to go to the cabin.  Once I got there, I would figure out my next move.  I knew I had to get out of Kilgore though.  This wasn’t going to work anymore, and I would have to pick somewhere that the Blue Skulls didn’t have any affiliation with, maybe somewhere up North.

 

Once all my stuff was loaded, I gave a last glance around the living room.  I took the ring off my finger, laid it down on the coffee table, and wrote a quick note.

 

After the note was written, I tucked the ring on top of it, and stared for a few seconds.  A lone tear rolled out of my eyes and dropped to the paper, splashing onto it and making a small watermark.  That was my cue to go before I was crying too hard to see.

 

I got into my car, started her up, and took off out of the driveway.  Luckily, Free had an automatic gate for those who had the tag reader in the window.  If not, I might have ran the thing down in my haste to leave.  I drove for nearly an hour before I pulled up into the old driveway.  The last time I’d seen it, the road was nearly washed out where the creek ran under.  Max must have had it fixed recently because a brand new road was poured, and a shiny huge pipe ran under the road to allow the creek to flow under it without causing any damage.

 

I drove up and passed the pond, wondering if there were any fish after all these years.  Most likely there wasn’t.  Years ago, we used the pond as a shooting range.  Daddy would toss bottles and cans and we would practice shooting, or just shoot for fun.  Mom would sit back and take pictures while I shot to my heart’s desire.  That had to be the thing I missed the most about them. 

 

I spent more time with my dad.  It wasn’t that I didn’t get along with my mom; it was because my father did the things that I loved doing.  Hunting, fishing, riding 4-wheelers, and shooting guns were my hobbies back then.  When he died, all of that was a distant memory, along with my parents. 

 

Seeing this cabin brought back bittersweet memories.  As I made it up the steps, a smile crossed my face as I remembered the time my uncle fell through the railing when he was drunk.  Then I passed the window that my dad’s best friend shot a hole in while he was cleaning his gun.  Using the key on my keychain, I breathed a sigh of relief when it opened the door.  It never occurred to me, until right then, that Max might have changed the locks.

 

The cabin still had the smell of the old wood burning stove that took up the majority of the living room.  The kitchen and living room had an open floor plan with vaulted ceilings.  Two bedrooms sat across from each other, and a bathroom in the middle of the two.  A small, quaint retreat held many loving memories.  Today was a good day to remember those loving times, because, if I didn’t have those to think about, I would be remembering the smell of Gabe’s skin, or the deep timber of his voice.

 

The longing for Gabe was too powerful to ignore, unfortunately, because it wasn’t two seconds later that I started bawling and didn’t stop.  Laying down in my parent’s old bedroom, I saw that Max hadn’t changed a thing since they left.  The candle still sat at the bedside.  The same comforter adorned their bed.  My dad had had an old green plaid one for years before he met my mother, and they brought it out here as soon as they bought the cabin.  It’d been washed so many times that it was smooth and soft just like a t-shirt that had been worn a million times.

 

Burying my face into the comforter, I cried.  I cried for my parents, for Gabe, for Gabe’s situation, and, finally, for the baby that I was carrying, because I had no clue whether the baby would live or die.  This has turned out to be one hell of a week, and I didn’t think I could handle anymore.  I just wanted to lay here and sleep forever.  Sleep didn’t come easily; I must have cried for nearly two hours before it finally caught up to me.

 

Maybe everything would look better after a nap.