Audrey
After Enzo left my place last night, I could barely focus on what had happened. I kept wanting to pinch myself—it all seemed like a dream, like a really incredible, unbelievable dream. He’d actually been here, inside, with me! We’d had sex! It had been amazing. I couldn’t think about what we’d done without feeling blood rush to my face and my nipples tingle with arousal. I never imagined that I’d be the kind of woman someone like Enzo would want, but if last night had proved anything, our chemistry was undeniable.
When he’d gone, I put some water on to boil for tea and wrapped up in cozy sweatpants. Amazingly, Pepper was very well-behaved: she showed absolutely no sign of being upset with me. I’d have thought she would have spent all of her time growling at Enzo, but she’d stayed in the living room the whole time we were in bed.
I blushed and bit my lip as I waited for the water to boil. My body felt different, older somehow, and I shifted my weight from one foot to the other. Enzo’s words kept playing out in my head. How he’d made me call him ‘sir’, how he’d looked at me with an intense, lusty fire in his gray eyes. I’d never seen that side of him before.
When I’d first met Enzo, everything about him seemed so carefully controlled. Even though I’d caught him sleeping with Karen on the first day, it had seemed… well, different from how Enzo had acted with me. When we’d been together, it had seemed like we were alone in the universe. When he was fucking Karen over his desk, though, it almost seemed like he was showing off.
I shuddered as the water began to boil, dropped in a bag of green tea, and took a deep breath. What was going to happen now? Was I going to lose my job? Was Enzo going to get bored with me and find another woman to sleep with?
Part of me wished now that I’d spent more time in college trying to make female friends. Growing up, it hadn’t exactly felt fair—all girls in school cared about was whether or not you were wearing the latest trends. Everyone, at least everyone who cared about me, told me that everything would change in college. I’d pinned all my hopes on that mantra. Hell, I’d even scribbled it in dry-erase marker on the mirror in my family’s tiny, grubby bathroom.
But it hadn’t felt true, at least not at first. In retrospect, I’d been expecting too much to happen overnight. In college, I wasn’t instantly popular or beautiful or more well-liked. If anything, at first, I felt more invisible than ever. My crush on Peter had given me something to obsess over, but I kept waiting in vain for the pack of girlfriends that would never come.
“Your roommate is probably going to be your new best friend,” Mom had warned me as I was packing the small trunk full of my belongings. “Don’t tell her too much about our family.” Mom had crossed her arms over her chest, almost afraid.
I remembered laughing in response. “Yeah, right, Mom, she’s not gonna wanna be friends with me.”
Sadly, I’d been more correct than my mother. My roommate was a girl named Melissa and very unhappy with me. She’d been blonde and tan and gorgeous, with a wardrobe full of Lilly Pulitzer and monogrammed everything, and definitely wasn’t on scholarship. I’d tried being nice to her, then leaving her alone. But every new thing I did seemed to disgust her more than the last.
Suddenly, Pepper barked and growled, startling me out of my reverie. She padded over to me and whined, butting at my thigh with her big, blocky head.
“I know, girl,” I said, leaning down to rub her ears. As I moved, a gust of warm air came out of my collar, and Enzo’s scent mingled with mine once again. My cheeks flushed, and my skin seemed to tingle, like he was right back in the room with me.
Pepper whined, leaning against me and sliding down to the floor on her belly.
“I wish I had other girlfriends,” I mused out loud as I rubbed her soft head. “I wish I had someone to talk about Enzo with.” I swallowed hard. “I have no idea what I’m doing here, Pep. What if he hates me? What if he never wants to see me again?” Tears came to my eyes, and I brushed them away with one hand. “If he liked me, don’t you think he would have stayed? Isn’t that what men are supposed to do if they like you a lot? They only leave if they don’t want to sleep with you, right?”
Pepper made an uneasy sound in her throat and closed her eyes. I got the feeling she was sick of hearing so much about Enzo, but I couldn’t stop talking about him. He was magical to me—even the mere mention of his name sent my heart fluttering around in my chest like a bird on steroids.
“I’m sorry, girl, I know you’re sick of hearing that name,” I murmured as I took a sip of my green tea. It was spicy and piquant, and comforting. I loved the taste of green tea, even though I’d once hated it. Carl had given me a big box for Christmas last year, and now the taste was something familiar and homey, almost like spending time with him. “I can’t stop thinking about him though,” I muttered as I lowered myself into a rickety kitchen chair with my steaming mug of tea. “He’s incredible.”
Pepper whined and burrowed her face underneath her front paws. She rolled around on her back, sticking her legs up in the air and gazing at my face.
“I bet someone wants a belly rub,” I said affectionately as I reached over and rubbed my hand through her short, greasy fur. “And maybe a bath this weekend! You stink, Pep.”
Pepper barked once more.
“I know, I know, you’re not crazy about baths.” I leaned down and nuzzled her. “And I’m not crazy about talking about Enzo all the time, but here we are.”
Pepper growled and got to her feet, sauntering off towards the living room.
I stared into my mug of tea, wondering just how lost I was.
In the morning, I didn’t exactly feel better about my situation. I tugged on the first thing that my hand hit in the dresser. Some girls may have changed the way they looked after sleeping with someone like Enzo, but I didn’t want him to think that I was becoming obsessed with him.
Except you are becoming obsessed with him, a little voice said in the back of my head. You’re totally obsessed with him, and you know there’s no going back from this point on.
Rolling my eyes, I tugged on my bright pink parka and snow boots. It had snowed again overnight, and the sidewalks were an icy, slushy mess. I shivered inside my coat, wrapping my arms around myself as I walked to the “L” station. I hated winters in Chicago, and part of me wondered why I hadn’t looked for a job in Florida after graduating from college. But I knew the real reason without having to even question myself: because I couldn’t have left my parents.
I hadn’t exactly expected Enzo to ask about my folks. He’d seemed so shocked when I admitted to sending them money. Wasn’t that actually kind of normal? Well, maybe not for people like Enzo. But growing up, I’d always vowed to repay the people who had raised me.
Even though my parents hadn’t exactly kept me out of poverty, I never wanted them to worry about food the way we had when I was growing up. After all, I was their daughter, and children took care of their parents in old age. It was something that I would have felt horrible giving up.
# # #
Now, I was perched in Enzo’s office, going through scads of old emails. He’d handed me a stack of printouts as large as my head, and my head had begun to swim when he’d told me what to do. What do you mean, look for anything weird? This all looks weird! I don’t even know this guy! But after staring at the paperwork for ten minutes, I knew that I couldn’t just keep doing that. Eventually, I’d have to start reading and try to figure some of this shit out on my own.
Enzo was sitting behind his giant desk, scrolling through something on his computer. Occasionally, I’d glance up and find that his attention was completely on his screen. I could study him without him even being aware. As I stared at him, I was only slightly aware of my own reaction: increased heartbeat, dry mouth, nervous pangs in my chest every time he moved.
Enzo was the most beautiful man I’d ever seen, but now when I looked at him, I was reminded of the artful ways in which he’d seduced me the previous night. I couldn’t look at his luscious mouth without thinking about how it had felt on my body, or look at his sculpted jaw and think about the strong way that we’d kissed.
Before I knew it, I was blushing from head to toe.
“Audrey?” Enzo’s voice was strained. “Are you finding anything?”
My blush deepened, and I dropped my gaze immediately to the paper in my lap. I was ready to lie when I actually did notice something weird—the same expression that I’d seen in the last three emails.
“Actually, yeah,” I replied, biting my lip. “Um, he keeps using a certain phrase. Or rather, he keeps referring to what he’s calling a shoe store. But I don’t think it’s an actual store, or maybe it’s code for something?” I gave him a puzzled look. “Did you guys ever buy a store together? Or did he talk about shoes a lot?”
Enzo frowned. “No.” He shook his head and stood up. “No, I can’t think of a shoe store.”
I glanced down at the papers. “See, this email mentions it three times,” I said, shoving the piece of paper under Enzo’s nose. “Isn’t that unusual?”
Enzo took the paper from me and circled something with a red pen. “Thanks, Audrey,” he said in the same strained voice that he’d used before. “This means a lot. Thanks for your help.”
“Oh, I’m not done with the papers,” I said quickly. There was still a stack over two feet high on the table.
Enzo nodded. “Why don’t you look for other mentions of the shoe store?” He rubbed his chin with his thumb and forefinger, and a flash of lust gripped me. “I think that’s definitely unusual.”
I nodded. “Got it. Will do, Enzo. Thank you.”
Enzo grinned, and my heart slammed against my ribs. “Thank you,” he purred in a silky voice. “I appreciate your help, Audrey.”
With that, he sauntered out of his office, and I was left alone, with my own desire and uncontrollable emotions.