Chapter Two
Axel didn’t want to push things but neither could he help his alpha instinct to stay close after Joe’s near-drowning. His arm hovered, ready to catch the beta if his legs failed him. When Joe wobbled, almost losing his footing in the loose sand, Axel didn’t hesitate to wrap that arm around his waist, steadying him. Joe gave him a grateful smile that he couldn’t help returning.
When they reached the top of the path down to the beach, Axel went to go right while Joe tried to walk left.
“Aren’t we going back to the pack house?”
“We are,” Axel explained. “I just left some stuff on the cliff, need to swing by and grab it before it rains. If the walk is too much, you could wait here.”
“No, I can manage,” Joe assured him.
They kept a leisurely pace, neither saying much of anything. Axel felt he’d said enough already. More might feel like he was pushing. When they reached the spot he’d been sitting at, he let go of Joe for just long enough to crouch and sweep everything back into his bag.
“Wait, is that your sketchpad?”
Axel had been hoping Joe hadn’t noticed. “Yeah.”
He swung the bag over his shoulder and turned to head back toward the house. Joe suddenly went pale. “I think I need to sit.”
Axel reached for him as his knees gave out, helping him sink to sit in the grass and taking a seat beside him.
“I really think I should get someone. You’re sick or something.”
“Or something,” Joe agreed. “I’ll be okay, I just need a minute.”
He closed his eyes and Axel watched the muscles of his face twitch.
“Are you in pain again?” he asked, trying to work out what the problem might be.
“It’s like little muscle spasms everywhere. Not as bad as before.” Joe made a face and shuffled around on the grass. “Could I see your sketchpad?”
“Um…” He wanted to say no but it wasn’t so easy as all that. Joe had seen it before, he hadn’t hidden it from him. It would look weird if he started to now.
“Sure.”
Taking it out, he handed it over, his hands brushing against Joe’s as the beta took it from him.
Joe flipped through it in silence while Axel watched, trying to quash his anxiety. It was almost filled, only two blank pages left. He’d been slow to fill them, not wanting a reason to leave this sketchpad behind and start a new one. Joe found the sketches Axel had done of him. He skipped past the ones he’d seen before, from when they’d been together, but lingered on the newer ones. They were ones Axel had done from memory, from snatches of time they’d had together.
There was one of Joe at the clinic in the den, bandaging a wound on Max’s arm. Axel liked to think he’d captured another side to Joe, one his pack had tried to curtail; Joe’s healing nature, his love of helping people who were hurt and of bringing new life into the world.
The next picture was Joe holding one of Dara and Hunter’s kids. Axel wasn’t sure but he thought it was Lily. It was one of his favorite sketches of Joe, the beta looked so beautiful.
There was one other picture Joe dwelled on and it wasn’t one of him or one of the very occasional self-portraits Axel did. It was from the Red Fang’s arena, reflecting the violence and chaos of those few hours of his life. He hadn’t been able to forget and he knew he wasn’t the only one. One look at Max told him that the arena wasn’t easily forgotten.
“I can’t imagine what it was like in there.”
“I wish I didn’t know. But I’m glad I was there to help. It’s what you do for family, for the people you love. It was the moment I realized that I wanted more than what my father had in mind for me. That I wanted you.”
Inwardly, he was cursing. This was exactly what he’d promised himself he wouldn’t do; put more pressure on Joe.
“I thought I was getting over you. Until you came back to the den, injured, and all the feelings were still there.”
Joe handed him back the sketchpad, wincing again.
“Okay, now we really need to get you back,” Axel said. “Whatever this is, it doesn’t seem to be getting better.”
He was relieved when the beta didn’t argue, letting Axel help him to his feet and sling an arm around his waist to support him as they walked.
“Axel? Joe?” They met Seth before they reached the house, the alpha running toward them. “What’s wrong?”
“He’s sick or something. Almost drowned.”
Joe straightened up but was still leaning heavily against Axel. “It’s just some muscle cramps.”
Seth paused. “You’ve been back what, nearly a month now?”
“Nearly,” Joe agreed. Axel wasn’t sure what the alpha was getting at.
“I guess that’s about how long it takes,” Seth continued.
“How long what takes?” Axel demanded. Next to him, Joe shuddered.
“Regaining the ability to shift. I know it didn’t happen for you in the den, Joe. But we’re your pack, which makes me your alpha leader. Congrats. The pain will totally go once you actually shift for the first time. It’s just your body getting ready.”
“And you didn’t think to warn him? Seth, he almost drowned.”
Seth winced at the accusation Axel leveled at him. “Sorry about that, Joe. Honestly, it hadn’t even occurred to me.”
“You’ve had your hands full,” Joe said, sounding much more reasonable than Axel felt about the whole thing.
With Seth’s help, they got Joe inside and sitting down in the living room. Axel kept a hand on Joe’s shoulder as the other man rocked back and forth, rubbing his hands up and down his arms.
“Okay, so how do I do this?” Joe was looking to Seth and Dara for help, a good thing too as Axel was in no position to give advice. Everything he knew about shifting was from watching Seth and his pack and trying not to turn green with envy.
“Relax and let it happen,” Dara offered, Seth nodding.
Joe looked around the room before commenting wryly. “Yeah and that’ll happen with a bunch of people watching my every move.”
Seth snorted. “I’ll make some coffee.”
“I’ll help,” Dara offered and the two of them disappeared toward the kitchen.
“Do you want me to go?” Axel asked. Joe’s hand grabbed his arm. “No. Stay. Please?”
“Sure, if that’s what you want. Just try and do as Dara suggested, yeah? Relax.”
Joe scoffed at that but leaned back into his seat and closed his eyes. Axel watched him try to slow his breathing, the slow rise and fall of his chest mesmerizing.
“It’s rude to stare,” Joe murmured.
“I’m keeping you under observation. Have to make sure you don’t end up in trouble.”
Joe shuddered again, arms and legs curling inward.
“You’re never going to change huddled on the couch like that,” Axel said. “Come here.”
Joe reluctantly moved into his arms, letting Axel tug him into his lap. By the time they’d settled, Joe was sitting in between Axel’s legs, his back pressed to Axel’s chest. Joe relaxed back into his embrace with a groan.
“I’m scared,” he whispered, so low that only Axel would hear.
“Nothing to be scared of,” Axel countered just as softly. “You were born a shifter. Your body was made to do this.”
Taking Joe’s hands in his, he turned them over, using his thumbs to rub firm circles across Joe’s palms. Joe sagged against him with a low moan.
“That’s it,” Axel encouraged softly. “Just relax and let your body do what it needs to. All those muscles aren’t trying to cause you pain. They’re trying to do something. Trying to bring your wolf forth. All you have to do is let them.”
Joe’s breathing was growing deeper and Axel knew without looking that his eyes were closed. When the next spasm hit, he could feel Joe move with it instead of fighting it, his whole body relaxing, the change coming over him in one huge wave.
Axel moved swiftly, rolling them both to the floor, giving Joe the space he needed and watching the magic unfold.
Joe’s nose and eyes were hidden behind his paws, giving Axel the chance to drink in what he was seeing, pushing away the flash of envy that came with seeing someone having something he wanted so much.
“You’re not hiding from me, are you?” he teased.
There was a whine before Joe’s wolf lifted his head and looked at him. Axel found himself caught in the gaze of Joe’s yellow eyes. Even so different, there was no denying who he was looking at.
“You’re stunning,” he whispered as Joe got his paws under him and stood. He reached out a hand, letting his fingers run through Joe’s fur. Joe padded closer, scenting him before nuzzling his nose against Axel’s neck. Axel sighed and leaned forward, burying his face in Joe’s soft fur.
“I’m so happy for you, Joe. You’re complete.”
The high whine was unexpected and Axel jerked his head up. Clearly, Joe didn’t agree with his assessment. Axel guessed he was right. If he gained the ability to shift, would he be complete? And if he had to choose between having the ability to shift and having Joe?
“You complete me,” he murmured. “The ability to shift wouldn’t mean anything in comparison.”
The look in Joe’s wolf eyes said the beta didn’t quite believe him. Axel knew he’d have his work cut out for him proving he meant what he was saying. But he was never one to turn down a challenge.