The movies are full of shit.

Have you ever tried to slip out of bed and not wake the person sleeping soundly besides you, all while trying to yank the top sheet off the bed so you can toga it around you to maintain post-naked modesty?

Let me tell you, it’s not easy.

I huff and puff and curse a right fuss in my mind. My momma would have turned blue had she been here to witness it.

When you see actresses, and they wake wrapped in a crisp white sheet (plus flawless makeup. Yeah, right) and she effortlessly glided from the bed with the sheet around her, you forget she’s done that before the bitch climbed into it with the equally covered actor.

That’s not the case for me.

I fell asleep naked and woke dying for a pee. Like really, my bladder was about to burst. But I didn’t fancy scurrying across the floor buck-ass naked, so I tried in vain to grab anything to cover tits and ass. I’d made it out of the bed, and half the sheet was off.

Success!

In the process of at least covering some of my bits I didn’t hear the stirring behind me until.

“What are you doing, kitten?” The gravel in his sleep voice hit me in several places at once. All of them happy he’s awake.

I whirled to see Noah leaning up on an elbow. The comforter pushed right down to his carved hips. His sleep face kind of scrunched as he rubbed his eyes. And yet so damn gorgeous I lost the spit on my tongue.

His heavy-lidded eyes trailed over me. The rush of heat as I desperately tried to get the rest of the blasted sheet from the bed filled my veins.

What, was it stapled to the mattress? Dammit.

“I eh, was going to the bathroom. I tried to get the sheet off. Sorry if I woke you.”

He smiled then. A dark, smirk-filled smile, guessing my embarrassment.

He had no such emotion when he moved himself across the mattress, swung his legs out and prowled towards me. A jaguar in fluid motion.

Holy Jesus from Heaven.

It’s hot as hell.

Plus, he’s naked. Which is always a bonus.

I try in vain not to scan his body. I failed miserably and ended up averting my eyes quickly in hopes he didn’t see.

He cupped my cheek. Kissed me softly after he lifted my head. Holding me there so I had no choice but to look at blues. I couldn’t knock his hand away, what with me having a death grip on the top sheet.

“You’re shy? Now?” He murmured incredulously, running his thumb against my heated cheek. “You weren’t shy at seven this morning, kitten, when you were crushing my head between your thighs.”

Bless.

My.

Soul.

A series of awakenings flashed inside me.

His stroking thumb on my cheek stirred my skin until I sizzled.

The way he moved his body into my space until his radiating heat made my insides curl and pulse. It’s a wave of longing.

He’s not wrong. I did do that.

But to be fair, he woke me with licks and sucks. I was mid-orgasm, with my knees pressed tightly to his ears before I even realized what was going on. Still in a pleasure induced daze he’d crawled up my body, kissed the hell out of me and then —and I’m not proud of this— but I fell on his dick with my mouth like a starving woman and didn’t stop my suction until Noah poured down my throat.

We fell right back to sleep wrapped in each other.

Until now I’d thought it was a smutty dream. I’ve had plenty of those.

Noah tipped my blazing face up and seemed to look at me for a long time, his thumb nonstop caressing on my cheek. “Do you need a reminder of how not shy you are?” He asked.

For the life of me I don’t know what my answer would have been because morning sickness didn’t attack like normal nausea. At least with that you get some icky warning, your belly rumbling, juicy mouth and the urge to die.

This came on like it hated me.

Before I threw up on the bedroom floor, I dropped the sheet, all modesty forgotten. I saw Noah’s eyes widen, all smoke and sex. Not now, buddy.

I pushed him aside and sprinted for the bathroom, my knees met the tiled floor, I’d register the pain of that later, but right then I’m too busy hurling into the bowl.

Oh, god. It just doesn’t stop. Minute after minute.

Big, strong, comforting hands coasted up and down my back as I emptied the contents of my belly into the toilet. I wanted to cry at Noah to leave me alone with my impending death, that I didn’t want him to see me like this.

Turned out, puking takes precedence, all the while he crouched down behind me, rubbed my back, telling me it’ll be okay and held my hair.

He seriously held my hair back.

“Don’t look at me,” I whined during the interval of my death.

I felt like utter crap.

I shook and muttered for Jesus to not only take the wheel but to drag me to the afterlife already, so I could welcome sweet relief. I can’t face this for weeks, months even. It’s only been a few days and already I feel ninety pounds lighter. Win. But ten thousand percent like crap. Lose. “I’m hideous.” I cried, laying my cheek against the ceramic bowl.

Noah ignored me and continued to soothe the back of my neck. It was so nice and distracted me for a minute.

“Do you need anything?” Rub. Rub. Whimper.

I think my stomach finally settled down, but the nausea remained in the background with every swallow. It’s debilitating to know I can’t get off the bathroom floor. I suddenly have a lot more pride in my sex doing this, multiple times over after knowing how bad the sickness was.

Bravo, women, we are goddesses with giant balls.

“Remove my internal organs.”

He chuckled and kissed the crown of my head.

I don’t know how he can stand to watch me puke, the bathroom doesn’t smell all that fresh either, but he stayed and then he helped me into the shower. Waited outside the stall then wrapped me in a giant fluffy towel when I was done.

He informed me we had an appointment with his doctor in the city.

He’d been busy while I showered.

With a bottle of ginger ale and salt crackers we left in his car.

A few hours later it’s confirmed. I’m so completely pregnant. With my 12-week ultrasound appointment and prenatal vitamins in my purse it all began to feel very real suddenly.

We spent the rest of the day in Noah’s penthouse. There’s no point going back to the Hamptons. I could tell he wanted to ask if I’ve made any decisions, but he gave me the space to think as I laid on the sofa with my head on his lap while we watched a Marvel movie.

Later he ran me a bath even though my own legs worked perfectly fine.

I observed the meticulous way he prepared my bath, a little more in love with him.

When it was time for bed he tucked me into his without a word of me going down to my own apartment.

There’s something so magical about Noah taking care of me.

It washed through me, warm and beautiful.

We slept spooned.

He found me in his kitchen just after 2am rummaging through the fridge.

“I thought we had burglars or a very hungry bear on the loose.” He announced amused.

I looked up in time to watch his sexy stride. Bare feet. The infamous pale blue sleep pants that shaped his hips and showcased his body like a fucking Greek statue.

Good god, my ovaries clutched.

Good thing I’m starving, or I might have drooled. I went back to filling my arms with goodies, so I only needed one trip to the island counter.

Noah scooped everything out of my arms before I could protest. “Someone found their appetite. Sit down, Sena. I got this.”

“I can do it.” I huffed tiredly but slid onto the island stool anyway. If he wanted to help who was I to complain.

“I know you’re capable of making a sandwich,” he explained winking my way as he began to assemble bread and cheese for me. I pointed to the salted ham and he slapped four slices on. “Just let me take care of you.” He sounded so earnest my heart squeezed.

Could we do this?

Build a future, a real one as boyfriend and girlfriend?

I want it so badly it’s an ache in the back of my throat.

I’ve wanted him from the moment we met, and I want him even more now. Watching as his strong hands put together my sandwich, and the tightness of his abs and his chest that is— Jesus, I’m totally objectifying him.

I inhaled, focusing on my own hands for a second until my raging hormones have calmed the frick down. Or else I feared I might crawl across the counter and make him my snack.

“Apple slices?”

“Yes, please.”

“Ginger ale?”

“Please.”

To and from the fridge I covertly watched his body move in sleek, coordinated moves. He kissed the side of my head and placed a heaping plate in front of me. We didn’t talk much while I nibbled my way through the sandwich. I made the most of not feeling crappy by eating everything on the plate. He took the dishes from me before I could rise to clear them away.

He bent over to toss them in the dishwasher.

I swallowed a groan looking at his tight ass.

If he caught me he didn’t mention it. Rounding the island, bare feet silent on the floor, he slipped a hand on my waist.

“Ready for bed or want more to eat?”

I shook my head. “I had enough.”

Lacing my fingers, he helped me down from the stool just like a Prince would. It’s ridiculous but I am utterly charmed by his chivalry, and we walked silently back towards his bedroom. It felt very domesticated and nice. Yeah, it felt nice.

“Why haven’t you asked what I want to do?” I queried as we reached the bedroom door. We paused feet from the bed. “I thought you would once we had the positive result about the baby.”

I was aware his chest inflated against my shoulder. His head sort-of cranked down so we’re looking eye to eye. “I want you for you, not because of our baby. Is that what you think?”

Shaking my head, I gave him the truth. “No.” We’d be partners for our kid regardless of being together. I’d just expected him to push the issue now we are to be parents.

“I’ll wait for however long it takes you to choose us. I want you to want me for me and not because we’re going to be parents together,” his hand dropped mine but slid around to the curved dip of my back, holding me, not pulling me closer, but the magnetic force urged my feet to close the gap and cuddle into his torso.

“What about everyone else? Our families for starters.” I can only imagine what they’d say

My brain was so crowded.

Here’s something I know; trying to anticipate someone’s reaction was exhausting.

I bounced between elation and confusion and dread.

I don’t want to be constantly fighting battles of people who can’t accept me being with a man who is only straight for me.

“I’m dating you, not them.”

What am I supposed to do, invite them into our bedroom so they can see how queer he isn’t when he’s fucking me?

He kissed my forehead and urged me into the bedroom. “There’s no rush. You’ll know when you know.” That’s the thing. I do know! I know now I want him, and I craved us. I crave us so bad I tasted it, it beat through my heart and as romance book corny as it sounded I know my soul was meant to always be with Noah.

I’m just afraid of everything else that comes with it.

Fingers, soft and loving stroked the length of my side. “I’m right where I want to be, Sena.”

A storm of butterflies took off in my stomach. I burrowed closer.

He never missed a thing.

Even behind a wall of silence, he saw my insecurities and tried to alleviate them. It’s easy to convince yourself of something when your heart wanted it so very badly. My heart has a dog in this fight, so it naturally steered me to what it felt was correct.

Drawing in air I curled into his body and he wrapped both arms around me and teased his fingertips down my spine. I’m only wearing a thin cotton shirt, so every touch was fireworks over my skin when he inched underneath.

It’s his way of silently showing me what we have between us already when I shivered, not from cold, but from the need he exacts in me.

I turned my head and kissed his pec.

When I felt him grow hard on my hip I groaned and kissed him again, open mouthed and scraping teeth.

“Okay,” I husked.

As soon as I said it I became light.

 “I want us, too. Noah. So much. I want us to be togeth—” My sentence abruptly cut off when he swooped down and crushed my mouth in a wet, commanding kiss.

We parted and breathed the same wisp of air. In and out. Him then me.

And Noah smiled. God, he smiled, and it lit me alive.

Why did I take so long to agree?

This is my dream. My fantasy. He’s everything to me.

His eyes on me were everything.

They made me feel and say things. The way he looked at me all these weeks ago came flooding back and I understood he wasn’t looking at me as a best friend would but as a lover. Was I so blind? Was I so adamant in what we were doing was just a passing fancy that I didn’t see all those clues he threw out? I must have been.

He sees me, and I see Noah finally.

Finally.

I’ll wonder later why I didn’t say the three little words that have been in my heart for years.

But Noah angled his shaved head down and I met him part-way, eager for his taste in my mouth. He kissed me back, deeply and thoroughly, as if I’ve woken him from a long sleep, and he was hungry to taste what’s on offer.

His kiss was desperate, or maybe it’s mine that’s desperate.

My hands move over him, claiming.

Stroking down his sides, up over his chest, across his hard belly.

He tasted of mint and sleepy man and something underneath that was all Noah, completely rustic masculinity I’m addicted to.

My tongue flicked into his mouth at a rapid rate.

We groaned in sync, his fingers tightened as he lifted me by the ass. “Legs around me.” He issued in a timber so low only my lady parts recognized it.

I had no need to appear calm and collected. He sees the torrent of my need clearly and it’s mirrored back.

It captured my breath, completely losing me in the feel of his skilled mouth driving mine open deeper. I could only cup the side of his face, to wrap my limbs around Noah and fall deeper into his kiss. He’s so damn capable he moved us across the room while we were attached at the lips without crashing us into any bedroom furniture.

And I reached for more, pressing my tender breasts into his chest.

I ached so badly.  

He must feel how wet I was. How drenched as I ride my pelvis against his belly.

I’m too frantic. I can’t get purchase on what I feel and thank god for Noah being in control, he recognized what I needed long before I do by slipping a hand between us and grinded the heel to my pussy.

Oh, god. I bucked, moaning into his lips.

I gripped the back of his neck, he reacted with a grunt, his mouth widened to let me in.

“How do you know to please a woman so good, Noah?” I moaned, my neck hanging down as pleasure warm as sunshine filled my belly.

He chuckled and kept right on tormenting me. “I’m gifted,” his teeth nipped the side of my throat. “Or I just know how to make my woman pop.”

His woman.

I was gonna pop so hard.

Breathless, and more than befuddled, I giggled when he landed us on top of the messy bed, my legs still wrapped around him, he gave one lazy drive of his hips to remind me what’s between my legs. A very hard man.

Kisses brushed over my nose and cheeks, down to my lips. “You taste like addiction.”

He didn’t give me room to reply, good thing, since I blushed to the roots of my hair, he angled down and kissed me again, rougher, more insistent this time.

I loved it.

“Please,” I begged, licking him from my lips. “Please.”

If I was his addiction. What was he to me?

My eternal obsession.

I swear all the blood in my body gathered between my legs, making my clit pulse. It’s an actual throb by the time Noah streaked a hand down there sliding his fingers into my sleep pants and cupped me possessively.

We had a lot of questions between us, but I can’t rally the brain time to care right then. Not when I’m floating in Noah’s masculine scent.

I moaned without shame and bumped his hand for more.

“Needy, kitten.”

“Yessss. Make your woman pop, show what you know about pleasing me.” I whimpered with a smile into his mouth and he laughed just as a teasing monster would, his fingers worked my clit ruthlessly.

Tender then frantic, urging me to the edge yet bringing me back down cruelly.

He truly was a natural. Thank you, god.

I was going to come quickly at this rate.

“I've thought of so many ways I wanted to fuck you.” He groaned with sexual longing in his voice, licking the curve of my throat. He dipped his fingers deep inside me, finding my spot instantly. Oh, god. I need it. I needed that friction right there.

He tortured it. He owned it. He owned me.

“So many fucking ways I want to make you come apart for me, Sena. Every way I can imagine, every position I can fold you into, to drench this pussy for me. I hope you don’t mind the sleep we’re gonna lose.”

Noah didn't warm me up, didn’t get me prepared.

He didn't need to, I was flagrantly ready.

There was no time at all.

He went right for the kill, resolute on making me come hard and reckless.

And I did.

Fast, hard, so hard I couldn't stop my back from turning hollow, pushing myself into his hand.

The wet sound of his fingers drilling me was dirty music along with Noah’s rough directions. “That’s my good kitten, see how I make you pop,” he rumbled into my mouth, licking at my tongue. Sonic ripples of pleasure flowed through my body.

He released me and sat back on his heels to anchor his arm around my hips, pulling me down to him, he wrenched my already open legs wider to fit his form in between. Already reaching into his sleep pants, he pulled out his thick cock, the tip wet with pre-come.

I hadn’t even recovered when he notched himself to my entrance.

This kind of passion I understood. It made perfect sense we’re this in tune with one another. It’s Sena and Noah, no obstacles or misgivings.

When he breathed. I breathed.

When he moved down. I moved up.

He stroked fingers along my neck and I shivered.

We’re in sync and so in need.

“God. Noah. Fuck me.” I can’t wait any longer.

His eyes burned and when he inhaled he entered me swiftly, all hard, heavy cock and unshakable purpose. The action so unexpected, so good, I caught my breath as he crashed our lips together. Fingers flexed around my nape as he held me.

“Shhhh. There we go, kitten.” He coaxed in his roughened voice slowly moving until I was full of Noah inches. My legs spread wider. I have no shame when it came to him. I want him so hungrily my focus narrowed to a tunnel and I would open my legs in the middle of the street for him.

“Fuck. There. Right there. Oh, Noah. God.” I was a superfluous conductor. Noah didn’t need telling how to touch me. He knew how hard, how deep, how completely to fuck me.

And he did.

He grunted when he pushed, like he was having to work hard to make his thick cock fit inside me. I waited for that sound, it’s a sound that told me he’s enjoying the flow and the way my pussy squeezed him tightly.

He’s what I wanted.

In the dimmed light he was beautiful above me, all sharp shoulders and rasping ecstasy on his face.

His lips brushed mine. The puff of air tickled as he worked me. “I’ve never felt this before, Sena. This isn’t an experiment to me. This isn’t me trying to be normal, whatever the fuck that is. This is the best feeling I’ve ever had.” One heavy thrust and I cried against his shoulder, I couldn’t hold onto the momentum as his weighty cock tunnelled me faster over the edge.

I couldn’t stop coming.

I shouted his name with wild abandon.

My heart pounded.

He reached the center of me. Not only with his cock, not just sex, but everything he is, filled me.

I’m rammed full of Noah and I’m euphoric.

“You get me so worked up, kitten, until I can’t think of anything but this. Of pumping my cock into you again and again. Only you matter.” Voice strangled. Sweat slicked along the ridges of his back, my fingers clung to him, helping him to pump me. “Only this,” he repeated. “Us. Us, kitten, tell me you understand.”

He’s right. I haven’t ever felt this devastating gale of steamed lust before.

Noah’s never told me a lie, ever, and I must trust in what he’s feeling.

I need to place faith in what we have, to know it’s more than enough and has room to grow as we do as a couple and not just friends. That we don’t need answers to everything that we feel. Emotions aren’t logical after all.

Nothing about Noah and I made sense and yet we make perfect sense at the same time. We fit in ways I’ve never fit with anyone before. We’re entering new ground and while I’m slightly terrified I could lose him one day, I’m also wildly excited.

My dream is this man.

His sweat slick chest crushed mine, my fingers dig into his taut ass as he continues to move languidly as if we’re in water.

He’s poetry in sexual motion.

My hormones are so amped up I can hardly stand it.

“Us, lion. Just us. Please.” I kissed feverishly along his collarbone, up his neck to his 5 o’clock shadow.

We met in the middle and let our kiss take us away as he continued to pound into me.

He groaned. “Fuck. That’s it, kitten, fuck me back, move that sweet little ass up and take it all. Let me make you feel good.”

He chuffed air like it was going out of fashion. I’m no different, we’re hot and sweaty, writhing together towards that ultimate finish, it feels so good I don’t even know how long we fucked for until I came again.

Trembling. Convulsing beneath him, the pleasure made me moan with my teeth embedded in his shoulder. He rode out our climaxes with a satisfied smile on his face. I love him so completely, tears gather at the corner of my eyes.

It’s Noah. It will always be Noah for me.

Noah slowed, but didn’t come to a complete halt, not yet.

He looked between us at himself sliding into me, stretching my core, the sound of our mess clear to hear. My face flushed with desire and embarrassment when I realized what he’s doing. My legs twitched to close, only there’s a huge-as-fuck man between them so that’s not happening.

“You look beautiful on my dick.” He pulled out and we groaned losing the friction, but he only palmed the base of his cock, the veins protruding on the back of his hand drew my eyes. “I’m addicted to this wetness.” He continued to pull through my too-sensitive pussy, right up to my clit and down to my well-used entrance. “Does this feel good?”

I laid there well-tended to, my bones shaking, my legs useless.

I was a sweaty, flushed and very satisfied woman.

Each stroked had my belly shuddering. Blue eyes meet mine and I smiled nodding. I leaned up on my hands with the last ounce of energy I possessed and kissed him softly.

We kissed like that for minutes until he dropped at my side.

We continued to touch. His mouth found my neck as he whispered hoarsely.

“Baby. I’ve missed you so fucking badly.”

Same, Noah. So much the fucking same.

I could barely stand being without him. I finally felt like a whole human again.

While I peed and cleaned up in the bathroom a few minutes later I tried to gather my thoughts into order.

We have zero plan in place for my pregnancy.

Where we will live?

What do I do about my job?

There’s schools to discuss and what religion we want our baby to be raised with and every other mundane detail that comes with being a parent.

That’s for tomorrow, because right now, I need this and him more than ever.

It’s selfish maybe, but I agree with Noah. I’ve missed him so much too and all that’s on my mind is reconnecting to the friend I love.

I finished in the bathroom and paused in the bedroom doorway watching him sprawled out on the bed against the pillows.

His eyes were lazily hooded. Sexy as hell.

He found me eye-stalking him and smirked in return, beckoning me over to him with just a look.

Of course, I went.

“You’ve turned from beautiful to sinful. Now get the fuck in my bed.” He issued. I giggled and crawled across the bed until I’m close enough he roped me in with an arm.

Without giving it a second thought my head dipped over Noah’s lap and my mouth captured his half-hard cock in a tight suction between my lips pulling him against the roof of my mouth.

“Oh, fuck.” He groaned with a startled turned-on noise rattling his chest. Hardening ridiculously quick against my tongue.

I could do this for decades, admire his body, make him moan and roll his eyes to the back of his head. Pleasuring Noah was one of my life’s greatest joys, making him lift his hips, wanting a tighter stroke from me was a dream come true and I relished every powerful, erotic minute of it.

I held off his climax until he spat out curses, fingers drilled into my hair.

Noah being the control freak, he got his revenge by making me set his length free. Unhurriedly stroking his cock, his eyes darkened after ever pass knowing just how he’s teasing me as he knee-walked across the bed.

 “You have plans for that?” I asked. From the way my body heated I couldn’t be sure if the air conditioning had turned up.

“Mmhm.” All he answered, knowing he’s caught my attention when his next stroke was extra rough. Good god.

I couldn't think in words any longer. Can't think in terms of rational details.

He’s glorious.

So beautiful to look at. Even in the dim darkness of night, with only the light of Manhattan below us streaming through the glass wall, Noah was utterly spellbinding to look at.

I've already had two massive orgasms, and at the sight of him, all control and sexy, I tried to pull him down, aching for him to be inside me again.

This time he taunted me. Instead of plunging inside me like I begged for, he stared at me, his eyes glazed and filled with lust.

Then he smiled and kissed me lightly.

Another tease.

We needed this time to reacquaint ourselves and reconnect.

There’s lots of time tomorrow for words.

Noah was right.

We didn’t sleep much at all the rest of the night.