Chapter Eighteen
Jeremy
“I’m so excited, I might pee my pants,” Melissa squeals as I steer the car onto the highway.
“Let’s leave that to C.J. okay? Only one family member gets to piss themselves at a time.”
It’s been a little over a month since everything went down. The remaining True Life leaders are being held awaiting trial, but there is no chance they’ll get off. Considering they were charged as terrorists, they’re lucky they’re getting a trial at all.
All that takes a back seat today though, because our son is finally coming home.
Melissa and I have hopped back and forth between staying at her place and mine, but I know I’ll be staying with her now. If everything goes right, I hope we’ll be finding our own place together soon.
“I’m just going to hold him all night,” she says.
Look at her. The sun reflects off her black hair, making it look almost purple, and it’s a sharp contrast to those blue eyes that glow with happiness. She fidgets like a toddler when we pull into the hospital parking lot, hopefully for the last time.
I grab her hand and we make our way inside. It seems surreal to actually get to carry him out those glass doors a few minutes later, like they’re going to rush out and find a reason he has to stay. But, of course, that doesn’t happen.
C.J. sleeps the whole drive home, but he’s bright eyed and aware once we get inside. Melissa sits on the couch with him cradled on her lap, and I take a seat beside them. I don’t know how long we stay like that, just watching him, but I don’t think I could ever tire of it.
He’s still tiny, just short of five pounds, but he’s gaining steadily, and the boy is an eater. He has also developed a set of lungs and is not shy about letting us know when he’s hungry or unhappy.
He starts to fuss and Melissa hands him to me. “I’ll heat up a bottle if you want to change him.”
“Okay, buddy,” I say, taking him back to the nursery. “Here’s the deal. I’m going to change your wet butt, and then you get the food. Sorry, but you’re stuck with a bottle because I’ve reclaimed your mom’s boobs.”
“Jeremy,” Melissa calls out with a laugh. “I can hear you on the monitor.”
Shit. I forgot about that. “Well, stop eavesdropping. This is a father son conversation.”
Bright blue eyes gaze up at me like I’m the most fascinating thing they’ve ever seen while I undo his sleeper. Why do they make these things so confusing? It buttons up one leg. Why don’t they just make human clothing for babies? I’ve never owned a pair of pants that button up one leg.
I manage to get the sleeper off him, and he starts crying again. “Someday, you’re going to appreciate how great it feels to be naked.” After I started in the hospital, talking to him just became a habit. I know he doesn’t understand, but he seems to like the sound of my voice.
I unfasten the diaper, happy to see he hasn’t shit as well. Baby shit is a whole new level of disgusting. Green or yellow and runny. Ugh.
I take off the diaper and grab a wipe to clean him up. Before I get a chance to touch him, I get hit right in the eye with a surprisingly powerful stream of baby piss. It burns like fire so of course, I yell, which just allows it to get in my mouth too.
“What?” Melissa steps in the room.
“He pissed on me.”
She bursts into laughter as I spit and sputter. She grabs a diaper and lays it over the top of him in case he goes again. “Where are you going?”
“To rinse my mouth! It hit my tongue.”
When I come back from the bathroom, she’s still laughing, and C.J. is dressed in his sleeper. “Why did you strip him? Babies pee when they get cold.”
None of the books warned me of that.
“I had to get the diaper off,” I defend.
“Look.” She patiently shows me how to remove only the bottom part of his sleeper. “That’s why they’re made like this, to make diaper changes easier.”
Well, I’ll be damned. “There’s a real learning curve to this.”
Cuddling him close, she drops a kiss on my lips. “We’ll figure it out together.”
A knock on the door reminds me I’m waiting for a delivery. “Yeah,” the guy says, when I open the door. “Delivery for Jeremy Martin. The note on the porch next door said to come over here.”
“Thank you. The front door is unlocked. If you could just leave it in the foyer, I’d really appreciate it.” I hand him a sizable tip.
“Sure, no problem. Have a good day.”
Mel looks out the front window and asks, “Why is there a Lindon Gallery truck here? I’m not having anything picked up today.”
“I’m having something delivered.” She stares at me as I sit on the couch. “I bought a painting from this incredibly talented artist during an exhibition a few months ago. I would’ve bought more, but they’d all sold out, except for one.”
Her mouth falls open, and she puts Calvin in his bassinette. “You bought Mistake?”
“I did.” I look up at her as she stands in front of me. “And I hope that title isn’t true anymore.”
Her face softens, and she sits down beside me. “You weren’t the mistake, Jeremy. That morning after you thought we slept together, the way you looked at me and how that made me feel, that’s what produced that painting. I was the mistake.”
I’ll never be able to look at that painting again without it tearing my heart out. I pull her into my arms. “You could never be a mistake. I’m so sorry. I was real messed up.”
“I know. I forgave you for that a long time ago.” Her deep blue eyes connect with mine. “I’m glad you bought it. I didn’t want to let it go to a stranger.”
We cuddle for a bit, then Melissa makes dinner while C.J. sleeps on my chest. He’s going to be spoiled with us always holding him, but if anyone deserves some extra love and spoiling, it’s him, after all he went through.
He sleeps in the bassinette beside the couch while we eat, then get ready to watch the newest episode of Dark and Unsolved.
Mel throws her legs over mine, and lays back on the couch. “I’ve been thinking about something.”
“Hmm?” I rub my hand up and down her smooth leg.
“I know we agreed to move in together, but we didn’t decide where. I think we should move to Indianapolis.”
I’ve been trying to find a way to suggest that, but I know she loves this house, and that she has a connection with the Lindon Gallery. “I didn’t think you’d want to leave here.”
She tilts her head against the back of the couch. “The only other friend I had here was Agnes, and she moved to Florida. Your family is in Indiana, and I want Calvin to have family around him.”
I rub her feet, and she groans with pleasure. “They’re your family too. And I’d love to move back if that’s what you want. What about your sister?”
Kelly was due to transition out of the psych ward this week, but we got the news a few days ago that she ran. The cult really screwed her up, and therapy wasn’t successful in convincing her they were wrong. She needs long term help, but she’s an adult, and was found not to be a danger to herself or others so it’s nothing we can force.
Melissa sighs, and runs a hand across her forehead. “We don’t know where she is, and she doesn’t trust me. I’ll make sure my information is always public, so she can find me. And I thought maybe I could hire a private detective to find her, just to see if she’s all right, if she doesn’t turn up soon. That doesn’t mean I need to stay here.”
“We’ll find her. When were you thinking of making the move?”
“Does a few months sound good? I’d like Calvin to keep the doctors he’s had for a few more months. And it’d give us time to find a house.” She smiles. “I love the lake, but if we could find a place with any kind of nature around it, I’d be happy. Fields, a forest, whatever. I know we’d have to look outside the city, but—”
“I know a place. Tucker and Leah live on a farm and the land adjoining it has been up for sale for a while. It’s wooded and peaceful. We could build our dream home, and you’d have Leah right next door.”
Melissa squeals and vaults into my lap. “That’s perfect!”
Calvin isn’t a fan of her loud enthusiasm and lets out a wail.
“Aw, I’m sorry Cal-bear. Mommy scared you, huh?” She comforts him, then scoops him up. “He’s wet.”
“I’ve got him.”
She hands him over. “Are you sure? Better keep your mouth closed this time.”
“Uh-huh, keep running your smart mouth and I’m going to put it to good use.”
“You know that’s a reward, not a threat, right?”
I’m going to marry this woman. That is, if the next few hours go right.
I have no trouble getting his diaper changed this time and he doesn’t even fuss as I grab a nearby marker. I write a message on his little white undershirt and button him back up. I know she’s going to give him a bath soon, and my nerves are shot to hell.
After an agonizing hour, she finally throws a towel over the dining table, and fills his plastic baby bath with warm water. She’s not paying any attention to me as I walk around to stand behind her.
She unbuttons his sleeper and gasps. When she turns around, I’m on one knee, and hopefully she can’t see I’m shaking.
“Melissa, I know we haven’t been together long, but I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life. I’m not good at speeches and stuff like that, so all I can say is I love you and I want to be with you forever. Will you marry me?”
Tears spill over her cheeks. “Yes. I’ve never been so sure of anything either. I’d love to be your wife.”
I slip the ring on her finger and pull her into my arms, kissing her for what seems like forever.
“I love you,” she murmurs, when we break apart.
“I love you too.”
C.J. gives out an indignant wail. He doesn’t appreciate being forgotten half-naked on the towel. Melissa and I laugh, and she turns to him.
“Someday, I’m going to tell you about all of this,” she promises him.