“To passing the GED exam!” I hold up a glass of sparkling wine that Ethan left in the fridge and toast Andy on his accomplishment.

“It’s not a big deal.” He laughs as he clinks his glass against mine. “But I’m glad it’s over with.”

We each take a sip of the sweet wine and settle back on the couch. Out of habit, I glance at the baby monitor on the peninsula that separates the kitchen from the living room. Colby is sound asleep, and we can hear the very soft intake of each breath he takes. It’s a sound I’ve gotten so accustomed to over this past month, that when I don’t hear it, I practically panic.

I turn my attention back to Andy and give him his moment. “So, what’s next? Did you talk to Naheed’s brother-in-law about a job?”

Andy twirls the skinny glass between his fingers as he nods. “Yep. I start working at Café Om on Monday. It’s the one to nine thirty shift, so I won’t be around for dinner most nights, but he said the tips are usually decent in the evening, so I’m happy about that.”

“That’s great!” I lean forward, balancing on my crossed knees to give him a quick hug. “I’m proud of you.”

Andy takes another sip then looks back at me and sighs. “I’m glad it’s the late shift so I don’t have to wake up at five in the morning for work.”

I cringe at that thought. I’m definitely not a morning person. Of course, I’m usually awake at four or five on most days, but I’ve come to appreciate sleep in a way I never did before. Colby sleeps a lot, but in short bursts. I can only get a shower in or one chore done before he’s awake again and needing to be fed, changed, and prepped for his next nap. That’s why I’m often sleeping at random times throughout the day just to keep up with him.

“What about you? Didn’t you say Naheed called the other day?”

“Actually, I was going to tell you I talked to him this morning. Sean’s classes are kicking his ass, and he needs more time to study. As soon as the doctor says I’m good, which I’m hoping will be at my appointment next week, I’ll have a paid job waiting for me at Omega House.”

“Will they be able to watch Colby?” Andy sets his glass on the table and puts on his serious face. The one he wears way too often, especially when Colby is the topic. He’s such a little worrywart. “Because he can stay with me in the morning and I can drop him off at Omega House on my way to work.”

He’s really too good to us. “Don’t be silly. We’ll be fine. I really appreciate all the sacrifices you’ve made for us more than you could possibly know. I don’t think I would’ve survived the last few weeks without you at my side… And your brother.” I pause for just a beat to appreciate the flash of Ethan’s image across my brain. He’s been traveling for the past month but is due home next week for four nights. I’m more than a little anxious to refresh the images in my mind with the real thing. “Colby and I are doing great, and you are too. I want you to focus on yourself for now and don’t you worry about us. Now we focus on getting you ready for college in the fall.”

Ethan and Andy Skype every night, and I would be lying if I said I didn’t strategically place myself behind Andy in such a way that I could catch glimpses of Ethan while they talked. He’s so handsome and when he’s helping Andy strategize on college applications and financial aid options, he’s just so sincere and sexy. He truly cares about others and will do anything to help his brother succeed in life.

Colby sneezes and Andy and I both turn to face the monitor. When my beautiful son just twitches his nose and lets out a heavy sigh, we both smile and turn back to each other.

“He’s such a good baby.” I’m so lucky he’s not colicky. He likes to be in arms more often than the baby books recommend, but he’s just so cuddly that it’s hard to ever put him down. “I hope he behaves when Ethan’s home. I’ll feel terrible if we keep him up all night on the few days he’s home. It’s bad enough he doesn’t get his own room to sleep in.”

“If it’s an issue, Ethan can sleep in my room when he’s home. I’ll take the couch. I pass out here half the time anyway.” Andy shrugs off my concerns and a slow grin creeps across his face. “Besides, I think he’ll be fine out here.”

I raise a suspicious eyebrow. “What does that mean?”

“Nothing.” Freddie just smiles and reaches for his glass again, shifting his weight so he’s facing the TV. “Let’s see if there’s anything good on.”

* * *

“Thanks, Dr. Michaels. I really appreciate the tips.” Dr. Michaels has been wonderful these past few weeks. She is always available when I call with questions and had some great suggestions for getting Colby to sleep for longer than two or three hours at a time. She also gave me the go ahead to resume all normal physical activity. Her list included exercise, working, and sex. Of those things, the only one I expect to be a realistic option in my foreseeable future is working.

So, Colby and I will officially start working at Omega House in two weeks. Well, I’ll be working and he’ll be in the infant day care room, but having him close by will make it much easier to focus throughout the day. If I had to drop him off with strangers, I’d be a worried mess. He’s only six weeks old right now, and the transition is going to be tough as it is. The only thing easing my mind is knowing there’s a video baby monitor set up in the infant room, so I can check on him throughout the day. It might be a little distracting at first, but I think it’ll help me function in the long run.

Andy drops us off at home before heading to the coffee shop he’s been working at for the last few days. He said it’s a little overwhelming when the line gets long and people get impatient for their drinks, but I can tell he loves it. Having a purpose and contributing to the household is important to him. This opportunity is a great way for him to earn some money for college and help out with some expenses around the house.

That’s the biggest reason I’m going back to work so soon. Both Andy and Ethan told me a hundred times that I can wait a few more months, but I hate feeling like a leech. I need to get used to supporting myself and Colby, so as much as I’ve appreciated this six-week break from reality, it’s time to start earning my keep.

Colby doesn’t wake up when I move him from the car carrier to his crib, so I take advantage of the time and hop into a hot shower. He’s wearing his monitor and the bathroom door is open so if he wakes up, I can peek out of the shower door and see across the apartment to the screen that displays a video of his crib. It’s not the most relaxing way to bathe, but the hot water pelting my back and head makes it worth the preplanning involved.

I check on the baby a few times but he’s down for the count, so I linger in the shower longer than usual. It doesn’t take long to scrub my body, paying extra attention to my cock. For the past few weeks, I’ve given in to my baser instincts and allowed my fantasies of a certain alpha with hazel eyes and dimples I could fall into to satisfy my physical needs. I’ve never been particularly interested in sex outside of my heats, and since I’ve been pregnant almost constantly for the last few years, this is the first time I can take my own pleasure from sex.

And it’s the first time I’ve ever truly felt desire for someone.