Doe
He was coming for me. I knew he would. It was only a matter of time. Antonio had tried his best to reassure me I was safe here, with him. And by the amount of muscle constantly around us—around me—I was certain he was trying his best. But Antonio didn’t know Master V. He didn’t know the cruelty and the pure evil that pulsed through that man’s veins. Not a day went by that I didn’t think of him, fear the hour when he would finally reclaim me. But for the sake of my own sanity, I chose to live in the moment the best I could. It was hard adjusting from prisoner to welcome guest, and I often failed in acting as though I were no longer a slave girl who had no choice or rights when it came to anything. Even after our night at the beach, the promise Antonio made me to avenge my ruin, I still couldn’t let go of the past. All this time spent with the Valenti family, I still found myself wanting and needing Antonio’s permission for everything I did.
Why? Why, when Antonio encouraged me to be my own person, did I still want his approval, like a fucking dog with is owner? But luckily, Antonio understood. He knew it was difficult for me to switch off the slave after it had been beaten and abused into me. Whenever we sat at the dinner table with the rest of the family, I would glance at him, and he would give me a subtle nod, granting me permission to eat. Not because he demanded it, but because I still needed it. I wondered if I would ever be able to let go of the slave girl I had become so I could live a normal life.
Normal. I had never known…normal. And I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be able to pull off normal.
After dinner, Antonio insisted we take another stroll through the garden. He knew how much I loved to be outside in the fresh air, free. For most of my life, I had been caged, imprisoned between four walls. Now I wanted to grasp every opportunity to roam free without the shackles of slavery around my feet. And while I strolled through the garden, smelling the scented air in the evening breeze, I tried to forget about my past, and about the threat still hanging like a scarlet letter around my neck.
“Are you sure you ate enough?”
I smiled when I saw the concern in his eyes. “Karina kept on filling my plate. I couldn’t eat any more, even if I wanted to.”
Antonio shrugged. “My sister has made it her life’s mission to mother you.”
“She’s been very kind to me.”
He snorted. “Consider yourself lucky.”
“She likes giving you a hard time, huh?”
“There is no end to the attitude in that tiny packet of Italian dynamite.”
I let out a laugh but then swallowed when I heard the shrill sound.
Antonio stepped closer and gently touched my cheek, causing my heart to pick up pace. “You have a beautiful laugh, Doe.”
I smiled, my cheeks burning. “I like that you call me that.”
“Doe?”
“Yes.”
His thumb brushed across my lower lip. “Alessia is a beautiful name, but I can’t get myself to call you that.” He leaned down, pressing his mouth softly against mine. “You’re my Doe.”
I sucked in a breath, still tasting his lips. “I like being your Doe. I have no desire to be Alessia. She died a long time ago.”
His face hardened, his dark eyes suddenly turning black. “They killed Alessia. I got rid of Nessuno,” he wrapped his hand around the back of my neck, pulling me closer, “and no one will take Doe away from me. No one.” With a hard, desperate kiss, he sealed his vow, his tongue sweeping through my mouth with vigor. I felt it spread through the marrow of my bones, the power of his promise filling me to the brim.
He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me against him, our bodies molding together so perfectly. I’d never had the opportunity to travel, seeing the world, or been given the option to choose my favorite places to be, but there was no other place in this entire universe I’d rather be than in Antonio’s arms. Being so close to him, in his embrace, was my idea of Heaven. The comfort, the security, the sense of feeling cared for was so foreign to me, yet it was something I had quickly gotten used to. I wanted to be lost in him for the rest of my days.
With a deep rumble in the back of his throat, he moaned as he reluctantly pulled his lips from mine. “I have no idea what you’re doing to me, Doe.” Dark eyes stared down into mine. “All I know is that you’ve ruined me in the best possible way.”
I stilled. “Ruined?”
He traced his fingers over my hip, his hand finding mine. “You ruined me by taking my entire existence and making it yours.”
Our fingers twined together, and I bit my lower lip. “Is that a bad thing?”
A grin tugged at the edges of his mouth. “We’ll see.”
We walked up to the house. I leaned deeper into him, wanting more of his heat to spread through me. I wanted to breathe in his scent as much as I could to chase away the uncertainty that was currently burning a hole inside my chest.
We reached the top of the stairs when Lucio approached us. “You ready, cous?”
Antonio nodded. “Just give me ten.”
Lucio nodded, and I noticed the knowing glances they gave each other, the temperature around us dropping by twenty degrees. Antonio’s demeanor changed, hardened, and I could see the mask of his role as boss slip over his features as he turned to face me. “I have something I need to take care of.”
“You’re leaving me?” Panic started to claw at my lungs. I hated when he wasn’t with me. Without him, I felt vulnerable, weak…alone. I’d been alone for so long, and now that I finally had someone who made me feel secure like he did, I never wanted him to leave.
He brushed the back of his hand down my cheek. “I already know what you’re thinking. Don’t. I’m coming back. You know I always do.”
“I know.” I glanced at him from under my lashes. “Are you—?”
“Don’t. You’re not ready yet.”
I bit my bottom lip, my mind willing me to ask a thousand questions. But it wasn’t my place to ask…not yet.
“Come,” he took my hand, “I’ll take you up to our room.”
In silence, we walked up to the bedroom we shared. It still felt surreal, the fact that he wanted me to share his bed, in his arms. Master V never allowed me the comfort of a soft mattress and silk sheets. The only place he gave me in his chambers were the cold, hard floor, and if I behaved well, maybe a pillow. But nothing more.
I closed my eyes and tried to force the memories back into their compartments. If only they would stay there, hidden away and unable to hurt me anymore.
Antonio opened the bedroom door and allowed me to walk in first. He came up behind me and placed his hands on my shoulders. “I don’t know how long I’ll be. But I promise I’ll come back.”
I swallowed hard, hating that he had to leave.
I turned to face him. “I know it’s not my place—”
“Stop.” He reached out and touched my chin, his gaze focused on mine. “This is your place. Here. With me. You are no longer a slave, Doe. You’re not a nomad. You belong here, with this family.”
His heartfelt words spread through my veins, numbing all my uncertainty. All I could do was to lean closer so I could steal a kiss. A soft, gentle, simple kiss. Then, with my eyes closed and my head against his chin, I whispered, “Thank you.”
Strong arms wrapped around my shoulders, his warm breath coating the skin of my neck. The silence around us spoke volumes. He knew my thanks wasn’t for what he said. It wasn’t because he gave me a place to call home, or the kind of respect I had always longed for. My thanks was for what he was about to do—what he had been doing for the last few weeks.
With his nose pressed deeper into my hair, I heard him inhale as one hand reached behind my neck. “You are mine, Doe. And not even the devil himself will stop me from righting all the wrongs you suffered.”
I closed my eyes, pushing back the tears. They weren’t tears of sorrow or pain. They were tears of gratitude, of gratefulness and appreciation. No one had ever shown me such kindness, such devotion, and for that, I would give this man my soul if he demanded it.