WYATT
I hadn’t expected that stopping myself from looking at Marissa would be such a hardship, but it was. I used to want to bite her head off whenever she was near my adoptive family, but now I couldn’t help the damn need for her whenever she was around, burying herself deeper into my life even though it would undoubtedly bite us in the ass.
I glared at the BBQ and the meat grilling and widened my stance while my father talked about his job. I didn’t hear a single word he said. I was too busy straining to hear Marissa’s voice as she regaled Mom and Ava with tales from InkSpired.
Dad’s hand on my shoulder brought me back to him, and my glare on the BBQ eased off. I glanced at him in silent question, but one look told me I wouldn’t like what he’d say next.
“Son, I thought you were fine with Marissa coming for lunch today.’’ There was no judgment in his voice, and that made it worse. Danny Burton had always been understanding, ready to do everything for me to feel good and give me the happiness that had lacked my childhood before I came to live with the Burtons. What sucked was that he jumped to that conclusion, but I knew I couldn’t be pissed off about it. I had been a total asshole when Marissa made her appearance in our lives. I had to prove that my disposition had changed… But without letting on how much my disposition toward her had indeed changed.
I sighed and let my eyes wander to Marissa. Her face, so open and laughing did something in my chest, something so fucking weird I couldn’t place a word on it, but I savored it. It was nothing like my usual darkness or the pain I couldn’t shake off.
Then, I stared back at my dad and shook my head. “I’m fine with it.’’
“Doesn’t look like it.’’ He patted my shoulder before he scratched his shaved cheek. “I’m sure it’s not easy for you, but your mother appreciates that you’re making an effort. It means a lot, Wyatt.’’
I pressed my lips together harder when a cringe threatened to slip out. I hated the lie hanging there between my family and me. I wasn’t one to lie like this, not to the people who had never failed me ever since they took me in when I was an angry kid.
“It’s nothing,’’ I mumbled and put all my attention on the BBQ. I carefully grabbed the empty plate next to the blazing heat and with the clamp, placed the grilled meat on it.
Before I turned back to the table, my dad stopped me with a strong hand on my shoulder. When my eyes met his soft chocolate ones, he smiled at me.
“Whenever you need to talk, I’m here. I won’t tell your mom. Don’t keep things bottled up like you always do.’’
“I won’t, but I’m really fine, Dad.’’
***
MARISSA
Since I had met Wyatt, I had known that even when he hurt me and I hated him, I couldn’t help the magnetic force that tethered me to him, always drawing us nearer and nearer. But now that we were in a good place, sharing something I had never had with anyone before, it was harder to fight that force. It was a necessity, of course, but it made me feel like my skin was too tight, like my flushing was telling, that my eyes roving over him every once in a while, were sending lustful messages for everyone to see.
In one word I was paranoid.
“I want you to tattoo me,’’ Ava announced at the table as she finished the last bite of her apple pie. Her big brown eyes on me were so serious and determined that my mouth stretched wider into a smile so big my cheeks ached. It’s been going like this all lunch even if the lie by omission Wyatt and I trapped ourselves in sat heavily on my shoulders. It was difficult not to fall for the Burtons.
“You’re a little too young for that, pumpkin,’’ Lydia said with a laugh as she gathered our empty plate. Her eyes went from her daughter to me, and once again her violet-blue eyes, so bright with happiness, tugged at my heart and warmed me all at once.
“No, I’m not!’’
“Legally, you need to be a lot older for a tattoo,’’ I supplied gently and rubbed her tiny shoulder as she started to glare at her parents. It was the cutest thing when her plump lower lip poked out, and her thin eyebrows slammed over her soft eyes.
“I don’t see why I should wait so long.’’
“Because you need to be sure about what you want, peanut,’’ Wyatt said in a gruff voice as he suppressed a smile. “A tattoo is for life.’’
“But I want one!’’ She crossed her tiny arms. Her eyes were now on her big brother. “You have many, and Marissa has some too. Why can’t I?’’
“You can,’’ Danny started and at his daughter’s hopeful look he went on. “But not before you’re eighteen.’’
“It’s not fair,’’ Ava blurted and looked away when Lydia stood up to get the plates inside.
I didn’t like to see her like this, and I felt guilty. She was only ten and hearing her newfound half-sister talking about tattoos and how amazing they are, it wasn’t surprising that she asked for one. I rubbed at the flock behind my ear and leaned closer to her.
“Tell you what, if you have a pen or something that's easily washable, I can draw on you whatever you want. It’ll give you some thinking to do until you can have a real tattoo because your brother’s right. A tattoo isn’t a joke. It’s something you keep with you forever, a piece of you that you advertise to the world, a part of your life and dreams.’’
She nodded and then risked a look at Danny who immediately nodded with a tender smile on his face that erased the marks of exhaustion he sported. Ava jumped to her feet and ran inside the house without another word.
“I hope it’s okay. I should have asked first.’’ I bit down on my lip, but at Danny’s laugh, I relaxed.
“She’s a stubborn kid. She’d still be arguing if you hadn’t offered this solution.’’
“You’re going to suffer in a few years,’’ Wyatt noticed with a smile as he took another sip of his beer and outright laughed when his father groaned dramatically. That got Danny and Lydia’s attention as they froze at the table and near the door for Lydia. I, on the other hand, marveled at the light that shone inside of him, a light too rarely there that it never ceased to breathe fresh air into my lungs, pulling me closer to him as if an invisible link tugged me.
Wyatt’s eyes locked with mine a moment and nothing was faked or hidden right then. I saw lust, pleasure, happiness, peace and a whole lot of other things that knocked the wind out of me before they breathed life inside of me again, making me feel more alive than I ever had been before Wyatt.
He was everything, breathtaking and a danger to me and my heart that never ceased to beat for him way too hard and fast.
Someone cleared their throat, cutting through the moment. I blinked and looked away as my cheeks burned up.
“I’ve got a black one! Is that okay?’’ Ava ran up to me and effectively put an end to the awkward silence that heavily hung as Lydia sat down and put a fresh beer in front of her husband. Denny's eyes kept traveling between Wyatt and me. The only ones unaware that something was amiss were Lydia and Ava.
“The black is perfect. Sit on your chair and tell me what you want.’’ I snatched the pen from her hand and took a deep breath to steady my hands while silently thanking Ava for her impeccable timing.
***
WYATT
My fucking heart exploded. Or maybe imploded. The result was the same; my heart wasn’t the same anymore, but a mushy mess in my chest that beat out of order while I watched Marissa working on a detailed temporary tattoo for Ava on her forearm. Her hair shone in the sunlight, making it that much harder to look away. Her pink tongue appeared once in a while when she licked her delicious lips, and her cheeks had kept that deep red on them that didn’t come from the heat, but from the insane tension that went off a few minutes ago when our eyes locked not to let go until my dad cleared his throat.
I still mourned that moment because at that moment nothing had seemed messy or impossible. Nothing had been fucked up. Everything was utterly perfect in an imperfect world.
“I see now why you’re fine with Marissa here,’’ Dad whispered near my ear as he grabbed his beer for a sip.
My eyes left Marissa and Ava to focus on Dad, but the knowing look and the worry I saw in there had me dropping my gaze to the empty beer bottle in my hand.
“Alright, you’re all done. What do you think?’’ Marissa said as she capped the pen and eyed Ava with a soft smile I wanted to see again, but when she wore fewer clothes. The thought alone popping in my head accompanied by R-rated images made me twitch in my pants.
“Wow!’’ Ava’s voice rose as she squealed. “You’re so good! Look, Wyatt!’’ She held out her tiny arm, and I couldn’t lie. With just a black pen, Marissa managed to draw a kickass butterfly that suited my sweet little sister well.
“It’s great. Marissa’s talented,’’ I said and put down the beer bottle, jaw tensed when I felt the calculating look of my father.
“It’s beautiful,’’ Mom approved, and she sent a big smile to Marissa. At that moment it was the replica of the kind of smile she gave Ava and me. It was a maternal smile that warmed even the coldest places inside you, and I felt no jealousy, no fear either. All that was gone the moment I let Marissa in, burying her deep inside of me.
“Thank you,’’ Marissa said and beamed at us, but avoided making eye contact with me. It was safer this way, but it sucked. I gritted my teeth harder. “It’s getting late. I have plans later, so I better get going.’’
“But it’s early!’’ Ava protested, and I’d have echoed her in my head if only Marissa’s plans hadn’t involved me and a few drinks with Ralph at the bar in Atlanta that Marissa had made me discover that day when I met her at InkSpired.
“Ava,’’ Dad said sternly, and her answering theatrical sigh had all of us fighting a smile.
“Will you come back soon then?’’ Ava asked Marissa, pleading with her eyes.
“Of course.’’ She bent and kissed Ava’s temple before standing up. We all followed her. “I’ll call next week and see what we can plan.’’
Ava nodded and wrapped her arms around Marissa’s. If I hadn’t been convinced already that I made the right choice when I encouraged Marissa to get closer to my mom and Ava, that sight would have. Both of my girls’ faces were worth it at that moment.
***
MARISSA
“I swear Ava is going to steal my heart,’’ I said to Wyatt as I walked inside the house after bidding my goodbyes to Danny and Lydia once I extricated myself from the huge hug Ava gave me.
“She’s the best kid.’’ He towered over me and stopped me before I opened the front door to leave. His big hand wrapped around my forearm before it glided down to grab my hand. That touch on my skin said more than any words he could have muttered. It was tender and a testament to his affection, something he had a hard time letting out. It called out to me, making me crave his arms around me and his heat to sip into me from head to toes. It went beyond the sex for me, and a part of me worried that I was way over my head, but I was too weak to stop the inevitable.
“Do you think they suspect something?’’ I asked, voicing my worries in a whisper as I linked my fingers with his.
“Nah, don’t worry.’’
“I’d be more convinced if you weren’t frowning right now.’’
“I always frown.’’ He pressed a kiss to my forehead and squeezed my hand. “Everything is fine. Meet you at the bar with Ralph later?’’
“Okay, but I think—’’
“Don’t say we need to avoid each other when we’re with my family.’’
“Wyatt…’’
He sighed and nodded. “We’ll talk about this later. Go before I grab you and kiss you against that stupid door.’’
A smile broke free on my face, and I escaped him as his dark eyes turned molten with the kind of lust I knew we had a hard time containing.
But once I was out of the house and walked to my beat-up car, my worries came back, both from the fear of the Burtons finding out about Wyatt and me and for myself as I seemed to give to Wyatt more and more of myself without protecting my heart. It could be crushed so easily.
I didn’t have a choice. I had launched myself head first in this mess, and I needed to trust that Wyatt would respect his vow of not hurting me again, not willingly at least.