Luke
The girl was impressive. She had barely whimpered when I splinted that foot. And deep down I knew I’d made the right decision. It was better that we waited out the darkness and left in the morning.
“If we’re staying the night,” I told her, “then I’m going to move you over by the bluff. It will act as a reflector for the fire and keep us warm enough. Besides, the ground is softer over there.”
She gritted her teeth as she nodded. God, she must be racked with pain. My heart went out to her. She reminded me of an injured calf. All big eyes and soul tearing innocence.
“I’m sorry if this hurts,” I said as I slipped an arm under her knees and another beneath her shoulders. She shook her head, but I could tell by the set of her jaw that she was fighting back a scream of pain.
Lifting her up, I pulled her to my chest. The girl was all soft curves and weighed less than a breath of air. Her arms wrapped themselves around my neck as she buried her head in my shoulder. I held her there for a moment, letting her rest. A protectiveness flashed through me. Nothing would be allowed to hurt this girl ever again.
Suddenly I realized what I had really missed over the last two years. Before, it had all been a hazy need. Now, here it was, live and real in my arms. Connectedness.
As I settled her down with her back to the sandy bluff, I made sure to be gentle with her leg. When I pulled back, her arms continued to hold me around my neck. For just the briefest of seconds, our eyes locked and we became lost as our world disappeared.
Blushing, she let go and looked away. I swallowed hard and told her I needed to get some firewood before it got dark. That was my excuse. But deep down I knew I was running away. Amy Jensen was not in my future. She deserved so much more.
Shaking my head at stupid thoughts, I set off.
One of the beautiful things about a Northwest forest is that there is a ton of wood within a few steps so I didn’t have to leave Amy alone for long. It only took a few minutes and I had more than enough to last us the night.
Once I had it all set up, I removed a storm match from a secret compartment of my pocket knife. A memory of Dad giving me the knife for my tenth birthday flashed through my mind. He had shown me the secret compartment that kept the wooden match.
“Anyone who can’t start a fire with only one match doesn’t know what they are doing,” he had told me on one of our camping trips. And since then, it had always been a point of pride with me.
In no time, I had a nice blaze going. I glanced over at Amy. She smiled back at me through her pain.
“Aren’t you cold?” she said nodding at my now sleeveless shirt and holding up my jacket.
“I’m fine,” I told her as a strange feeling filled me. I wasn’t used to having people worry about me. Mom and Jenny, sure. But, anyone else. No, not in a long time.
Amy shrugged as she snuggled back down under my jacket.
Nellie laid next to her good leg, helping to keep her warm. I smile and nodded to my dog, silently thanking her and letting her know she was doing good. Nellie cocked an eyebrow at me, telling me that of course, she was taking care of Amy. Amy was family.
My insides turned over as I thought of just how true that was. The feel of her in my arms wouldn’t go away though. Those curves. That softness and the way she looked at me. As if she trusted me. As if she believed in me. It was enough to make a guy’s guts twist themselves into knots.
What now? I wondered as I squatted down next to the fire to feed it some larger sticks and give it a quick stir.
“Will we be okay?” Amy asked through gritted teeth. “I mean the cougar and stuff.”
I nodded, “Between the fire and Nellie. We’ll be fine.”
Amy tried to smile but it came out more like a grimace. Her face was white even in the glow of the yellow firelight. Was she going into shock? For the thousandth time, I second-guessed the decision to stay the night.
Between her leg and that bump on her head, she needed to be in a hospital. Not sitting next to a stream in the forest.
“Thank you,” she said. “For coming to get me.”
All I could do was nod. “Jenny would kill me if I let anything happen to you.”
She laughed then quickly grimaced again when another wave of pain shot through her.
“I’m thirsty,” she said as she licked her lips.
I swallowed hard and shook my head. “I’m sorry Amy. But the streams around here are filled with giardia. The last thing you need right now is a bad stomach bug.” A wave of guilt washed over me. I knew technically it wasn’t my fault but still, I hated not being able to solve her problems.
She frowned as she took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
I studied her in the firelight. She really was pretty. Even now, with tangled hair, grime and blood on her forehead, and a brow knotted in pain. Even then, she was beautiful.
Sighing, I turned to focus on the fire.
“I was driving a car a few hours ago,” she said with a shake of her head. “Listening to satellite radio. I had a device in my pocket that gave me access to all the knowledge of the human race.”
She paused for a moment. “Now, we are no better than cavemen. Sitting around a fire, scared of the wild animals in the night. We can’t even boil water.”
I nodded as I continued to stare into the fire.
“I never realized,” she continued, “just how close we were to losing it all.”
She was right. The difference was, I had always known just how close to the edge we were.
A small whimper that she quickly shut down caught my attention. I studied her for a moment and saw her shiver. Keeping her warm was going to be the challenge I realized. The fire helped, but it wasn’t enough.
“Here,” I said as I arranged branched that could be fed into the fire. “Scoot forward.”
She frowned up at me, her eyes examining me for a moment.
I ignored her as I restacked the firewood closer to her then moved to get behind her. She looked up, her neck craning to figure out what I was doing.
“I’m freezing,” I told her hoping she’d believe me and let me keep her warm.
A quick look of guilt passed behind her eyes before she wiggled away from the bluff, giving me room to slip in behind her. Nellie got out of the way as my legs nestled in next to Amy’s.
I felt her body tense up as I sat down behind her and put my arms around her, pulling her back to me.
“Relax Amy,” I said with a small laugh. “I promise to keep my hands where they belong.”
“I don’t know,” she said. “You just got out of jail. It’s dark. We are alone in the woods. Every book I have ever read tells me this is not a smart idea.”
I laughed. “Don’t forget, you’re Jenny’s best friend. That means I have to pretend to be a nice guy. At least for tonight.”
She laughed, her body shaking under my hand. “You a nice guy? I don’t think so.”
“What?” I said sarcastically. “I save the damsel in distress. Keep the wild animals away. And here I thought I was being a knight in shining armor.”
Again, she laughed. “You might be a knight. Probably even a hero at heart. But, you’re not the shining armor type. More the dark, brooding warrior type.”
“That hurts.”
“No,” she said. “Deep down, when there is danger. The warrior type of hero is so much better.”
I smiled to myself and relaxed. My eyes closed for a moment as I let her soft warmth wash through me. A guy could get used to this, I thought.
The two of us sat there, her back resting against my chest. Her head nestled up just under my chin. A whiff of her perfume and shampoo washed over me. Honeysuckle and Jasmine, a sweet mixture of heaven and spring.
An easy peace settled over us as the stars crawled by overhead. Just the two of us. Alone in our own world. She had been right, I realized. When you got down to it. When everything is taken away. All we have is each other.
“Talk to me, Luke,” she said. “It helps keep my mind off my leg.”
I cringed inside. She must be in agony. Most people would have been whining and crying. But not her, she just bit down and put up with it the best she could.
“What do you want to talk about?”
“I don’t know,” she said as she pulled my jacket up to her chin.
My stomach turned over. What could I talk about to this girl? We had absolutely nothing in common.
“What do you want to be when you grow up is always a good place to start,” she said with a small chuckle.
I laughed. “I don’t know. I just know it has to be outside. I’d go crazy working in an office all day. Actually, anywhere surrounded by four walls.”
She nodded as if she understood.
“Besides,” I continued, “a lot of things are sort of closed off now.”
A heavy awkwardness hung in the air around us. I knew she was thinking about my moral character as she called it. Or lack thereof.
My history flashed through my mind. For the first time, I felt embarrassed. Except for mom. I had never worried what people thought. But now. Suddenly. It seemed important.
“What would you do if you could do anything? No money worries. No … History. What would it be?” she asked softly.
I paused for a moment as my stomach turned over. We were getting into deep territory. The kind of things that I didn’t like talking about. Things that were out of reach and to be forgotten.
Delaying, I tossed a stick onto the fire and used another one to move it into a better position.
Amy twisted to look at me over her shoulder. Her eyebrow rising in question.
I sighed heavily. “I guess if I could do anything. I’d be a veterinarian. Large stock mostly. Cows. Horses.”
“What? You?”
My insides clenched up. I knew I shouldn’t have said anything.
Amy’s shoulder’s slumped. “I’m sorry. That came out wrong. … I think you’d make a good vet. Jenny always said you were great with animals. And we know you can splint a leg like an expert.”
I nodded, surprised at how her surprise had hurt.
“Luke,” she said as she turned around to look at me. “Really, I am sorry.”
I smiled back at her. “Don’t worry about it. Even if I didn’t have a record. We could never afford it. Mom’s barely holding onto the farm as it is. Me being gone for two years sure didn’t help.”
She nodded then turned back to stare at the fire. Once again, an awkward silence fell over us.
“What about you?” I asked. “What are your dreams?”
She sighed heavily. “I don’t know. Dad wants me to be a doctor of course. But I just don’t know. I’ve volunteered at the hospital. But something doesn’t fit me. All those sick people. I get frustrated that sometimes they can’t be helped. You know?”
I nodded, then realized she couldn’t see me. “Sure, I understand.”
She took a deep breath and settled into me as a comfortable silence fell around us. The two of us sat there. My arms around her, the cool night air tickling, reminding us of where we were and that we were alone.
The yellow firelight cast everything in mellow shadows. Holding the darkness at bay.
I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling. Something about a girl. Soft, sweet, fresh, so perfect.
Yes, I thought. This might be Jenny’s best friend and she would kill me if she ever knew what I was thinking at the moment. But I couldn’t have stopped myself If I tried. The thoughts wouldn’t leave me alone.