I Want Him Back Too

Day used the garage opener to lift the door and coasted his Harley Sportster into the small space next to his SUV. He peeled his tired leg from over the seat and dragged his heavy body through the side entrance of his home. Day had ridden around for three hours after God had thrown him out like he was yesterday’s trash. It’d hurt him in a way that he never fathomed. He’d been caring for God's every need for two days, pretty much saved his life… and one mistake made, and God wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

Being partnered for four years, they’d had their share of disagreements, but nothing like this, and God had damn sure never put his hands on him in anger. Day didn’t want to, but his body wasn’t obeying his commands. He went straight to his room to plug in his cell phone that had died during his long ride. He had to see if God had called him. Day shucked his leather jacket and draped it over the La-Z-Boy in his bedroom. He plopped down on the edge of the bed and waited impatiently for the phone to boot up.

E-mail. He might have e-mailed me.

Day put the phone on the nightstand and made quick steps to his laptop and turned that on too. Day had one hand in his mouth, chewing relentlessly on a nail, while his left boot tapped an erratic rhythm on the hardwood floor. He logged into his e-mail account and saw that he had fifty-two e-mails… but not one from God. Dammit!

Day picked up his cell phone at the sound of the message notification beeping. He couldn’t believe he was actually nervous. He scrolled through his missed voice mails and then his texts… nothing.

“Son of a bitch!” he yelled, throwing his phone across the room.

Day dropped to his knees and cried out at the pain that action caused. He maneuvered until his back was against the bed and dropped his head into his hands. Day went over and over in his head what the hell happened today. How it started, why God got so angry. How could God hide this from him? But most of all, why had Genesis called God a murderer?

He stayed that way, trying to rationalize things in his head until his cell phone rang. Damn, I thought I broke it. Day jumped up and scrambled to get the phone from behind his dresser before it stopped ringing. He grabbed it and flipped it over to look at the display. Fuck.

“Hey, Jax,” he said, trying but failing to hide his disappointment.

“Leonidis, what the heck is going on?” Jax’s voice was not the usual cool and calm it always was.

“Why? What is it?” Day asked worriedly.

“I’m at God’s place and it’s empty. The door was unlocked as usual, but he’s gone and so is most of his stuff,” Jax said.

Day’s stomach dropped and his heart began to beat at a hysterical pace.

“Jax, is there any sign that there may have been a struggle or is there something like a note or object lying around that might suggest where he went?”

“You mean he’s not with you?” Jax asked.

“Yeah, Jaxson, he’s right here beside me, sipping a damn rum and Coke. I just wanted to ask you a completely asinine question that I already know the fucking answer to,” Day snapped.

“Leonidis,” his brother yelled in his reprimanding voice, “don’t you take that tone with me, and darn sure stop cursing at me! No, there doesn’t look like there was any type of foul play, and no there is no note that I can see. Now take a breath and tell me what is going on.”

“Long story short. I called Cash’s schizo brother on a hideaway phone that I wasn’t supposed to see or especially use. But I did. Bit-bam-boom. God’s angry brother is there yelling, hitting, scratching and clawing at God trying to kill him… and the fucker is built like a semi, so I couldn’t take him down. Then the thuggish neighbors burst in like the brute squad and all hell breaks loose. God points a fuckin’ cannon at everyone in turn, severely pissing off his neighbors. Last but not least, God throws me across the room and tells me to get the fuck out. Now I’m here and you’re telling me my partner is MIA again.”

“He hit you and then threw you out after all you’ve done!” Jax yelled.

“It was bad, Jaxson. I’ve never seen God look that defeated.”

“It couldn’t have been that bad that he had to hurt you, Leo.”

“Oh no, it was bad. It was the fucking first twenty minutes of Saving Private Ryan bad, Jax.” Day paced as he listened to his brother go on about God accepting responsibility for his own actions.

“Jax, don’t get me wrong, I’m highly pissed off with my partner. I’m pissed off to the highest of pisstivity. But I still have to know that he’s okay. That crazy brother of his really landed some hard blows on him and God didn’t fight back at all.”

“Because it’s his brother. That I do get,” Jax said softly. “But I can’t check on him, Leo, because believe me, there is nothing here to clue me in on where he went.” Jax paused before speaking again. “I must say I’m curious how he got all that heavy furniture out of here if he was in as bad a shape as you say.”

“Well, that wouldn’t be too hard to do. A lot of people owe God favors—both of us actually. If God called someone for help, they’d drop everything and come to help.” Day took a deep breath. “The same as I would if he had called me.” Day’s voice was strained from the ache in his chest and he had no doubt that Jax was picking up on it.

“That asshole,” Jax snapped.

“Whoa, big brother. Don’t go cursing away your do-gooder image. You know you’re not a vulgar-language type person… leave that for us heathens.” Day laughed humorlessly.

Day heard his brother's irritated chuckle at him for trying to lighten the situation.

“Fine. But, after he apologizes numerous times, I’m going to give him a piece of my mind,” Jax said.

Day did smile that time. He had no doubt his brother would do just that.

“Oh shit!” Day snapped his fingers at his recollection of something very critical. Why do I always forget about this? “I know exactly where he is… or at least I will in a second.” Day hung up without another word.

He pulled up his track-your-lover app on his phone. He never did tell God how he’d found him in that alley in Buckhead. It took a few seconds for the app to open fully before he saw the red dot beeping on the map of their city. You call yourself a detective, God. Pfft. He immediately called his brother back.

“Jax, he’s at the Fairfield Lodge in East Point. Please go check on him.” Day didn’t want to sound so pathetic. God had thrown him around and tossed him out like old leftovers, but Day loved him and would never want to see God hurt or in need of help but too proud to ask for it.

God was at the counter of the shady Fairfield Lodge hotel. It wasn’t the worst but it damn sure wasn’t the best. God pulled on his leather coat to try to conceal his weapons, not wanting to scare the clerk. It was almost ten at night, and all he had was one suitcase of clothing and one of his video games.

The clerk came from the back of the office and walked up to the counter, still not making eye contact with him.

“How much for a week?” God asked.

Maybe it was his deep voice or his drawl that caught the woman off guard because she jerked her head up from typing on the outdated computer to put a face with the rough-hewn voice. After taking in God’s appearance she quickly turned her nonchalant demeanor into one that suggested God could have some company in his room tonight if he preferred.

God had to work hard not to frown at the small lady. He was sure she was a nice enough woman and could probably provide him some decent entertainment, but his mind was somewhere else… on someone else.

She batted large brown eyes that were enhanced with a little too much makeup, her lips painted a deep shade of red. Her hair was in a classic bob cut and framed her blushed cheeks.

“That will be two hundred dollars for a week,” the clerk said around a wide smile.

God winced a little internally at the price. His payday was next week, but he had to make the three hundred and seventy-two dollars in his bank account last until then.

The clerk continued, “We have cable and Wi-Fi, there’s a small workout room on the first floor, there’s ice and vending machines on each floor, and a free continental breakfast on the weekends from six to eight in the morning.”

“I’ll take one with a king-size bed if you have it,” God responded drily.

“No problem. Are you checking in anyone? Are you sharing the room?” she questioned.

“Single, please, and first floor if you have one.” God didn’t want to lead this woman on, but he didn’t want to pay an extra charge either for checking in two people.

The clerk did a terrible job at concealing her excitement. She asked for his license and pecked away at the computer.

“You’ll be in room 165 on the bottom, around the back.”

“Anything on the front?” God asked. He liked to see who was coming and going.

“Anything for you.” She winked, and he had to restrain from sucking his teeth and rolling his eyes. Whatever happened to professionalism?

“Okay. How about room 114, it's right there.” She pointed out the window. He didn’t turn around to look. He signed the papers that said he’d be a good guest or else pay the consequences, and went for the key card in her outstretched hand. When he tried to extract it from her claws, she jerked it back toward her and asked in what she thought was a sexy voice, “How about I come turn down the bed for you? We offer that to our special guests.”

“Good thing I’m nothing special,” God grumbled and pulled the key card from her.

He heard her mumble on his way out the door. “Some motherfuckers are so blind; they can’t see a good thing when it’s staring them right in the face.”

God actually thought that was hilarious, but the irony was not lost on him. Day had been there in his face all along, and he’d missed it. Now he may have pushed Day out of his life for good… literally. God was still beating himself up for putting his hands on Day like that. But even worse was that Day had gotten up and still tried to help him.

He fit the card into the slot. When the light went from red to green he opened the door, entering the dark, damp room. He flicked the light on the wall and let the door slam shut and lock automatically behind him. Dropping the bag at the foot of the bed, he dug in his pocket for the pain pills Jax had left him and popped two in his mouth, swallowing them dry. He peeled off his coat and placed his holster and weapons in the one drawer in the bedside table right next to the Gideon Bible.

A hot shower and a little food might help how he felt. But he doubted anything could take away the vision he kept having of Day flying over the bed and slamming into his dresser. God squeezed his eyes shut. Fuck. I’m so sorry, sweetheart.

Too much happened in that room at once. God wasn’t seeing straight. Genesis was beating the hell out of him. Day had violated his trust. His hood-rat neighbors had barged into his home and choked his brother. God had so much medication coursing through him he’d reacted without thinking.

Now he wanted to call Day so badly, but he needed to let things cool off between them. Then he’d have to figure out how he was going to make it up to him.

God opened up the brown shopping bag and emptied the contents onto the small dining table. He’d stopped and picked up some orange juice, a few cans of soup since his throat was still a little sore, some paper utensils, and some snacks. He poured some soup in a bowl and popped it in a microwave that was small enough to pass as an Easy Bake Oven.

God dumped his toiletries bag on the bathroom sink and looked at himself in the mirror. He looked like day-old shit. His deep wavy hair was all over the place, his beard had no contour to it, and his eyes looked like he’d just smoked crack. He rubbed his hands over his face and blew an exasperated breath.

Please have somewhat decent water pressure.

God twisted the faucet handles on the stall shower and turned the water up as hot as he could stand it. He washed quickly and then stood still, letting the water beat on the back of his neck. It wasn’t as hard as he liked but it would do. He stood there until the water started to turn cool. He shaved his beard, leaving his goatee and a little bit of length under his chin. He combed his hair until there were no more tangles and left it down to dry. He felt better… physically.

With a small, scratchy towel wrapped around his waist, God went to retrieve his soup and sat in one of the small chairs at the two-person table. At least they were cushioned. His bed didn’t look as inviting, with the typical hotel comforter that always slid off the bed and onto the floor in the middle of the night. God hoped the sheets were changed regularly, but his gut told him they probably weren't. Thank the Lord I’m still on antibiotics. Could probably catch instant herpes in that bed. He snorted and downed his bowl of soup in three quick gulps. He hadn’t even realized how hungry he was until the bowl was dry and he immediately wanted more. So he popped open another can. Day’s soup was better.

God wiped off the table and just as he was about to peel the covers back on the bed there was a light tapping on the door. He quietly opened the nightstand drawer and pulled out his 9mm. He pulled the curtain back just enough to peak and saw the night clerk from the front desk at his door.

Shoot me.

God cracked open the door. “Yeah. What’s up?”

She smiled at the sliver of his chest she could see through the crack.

“Sorry to disturb you, but there’s a man at the front desk asking for you and we have a firm policy of not giving out our residents’ information.”

God’s stomach began to flutter. It had to be Day. Maybe he’d followed him there, God wasn’t sure. “Did he tell you his name?”

“Yes. He said his name is Day,” she replied, still craning her neck to get a better glimpse of his flesh.

“Give him the room number please, and thank you for checking first.” God shut the door, not needing a response.

God had just enough time to throw on some jeans when a loud bang sounded on the door. He frowned and yanked the door open. God looked into the angry eyes of the wrong Day. He wanted to see Detective Day, not Dr. Day. God huffed and stepped to the side to let Jax in.

“How did you find me, Jax?” God asked as his greeting.

“I didn’t, your partner did. He seems to be able to track his lover anywhere in the United States,” Jax said with zero humor.

His brow scrunched for a couple seconds before he realized what Jax was talking about. Track your lover. “He’s actually using that goddamn app on our phones. Sonofabitch.”

“If you weren’t still sick and so freakishly huge, I’d punch you in the jaw for hurting my brother,” Jax fumed.

God plopped down on the bed and hissed at the pain in his ribs.

“Jax, I don't make excuses. I fucked up and I admit it. I will fix this and soon. Leo means everything to me, and really, he’s all I’ve got.”

Jax dropped his large medical bag to the floor and looked God in his eyes. “But do you love him?”

God didn’t speak.

“You already know how he feels about you. I’ve never seen him care for anyone else the way he cared for you while you were sick. He was scared and worried. He’s still worried. He sent me here, wouldn’t take no for an answer. You may care about him, but if you can’t love him the way he wants you to, then let him know now… not after he’s too far in,” Jax said.

God knew Jax was telling the truth. He knew Day was important to him, but love? He’d never been in love before. It’d been even longer since he’d felt loved by another. What Day had done for him over these past few days must be what people in love did. He didn’t need to reveal his feeling to Jax—like he’d noted when he opened the door—it was the wrong Day.

“I’ll fix this, Jax. You know I’m a man of my word. It’s all I have. I won’t spill my feelings to you. But I promise you, I’ll never hurt him again,” God said seriously.

Jax stared him down for a few seconds and God never looked away. Not until Jax believed he was sincere.

“Fine. I’ll accept that for now. Now lie back and let me take a look.”

“I’m fine, Jax,” God groaned.

“Shut up and lie back. I’m not going back to Leonidis without an accurate report that you’re fine,” Jax said while pulling out his stethoscope.

God mumbled some curse words as he positioned himself on the bed. He answered all of Jax’s questions and let the man wrap his bruised ribs. Jax told him he was fine and his lungs sounded clear. He gave him some more pain pills and cough suppressant just in case. He also told God to rest over the weekend and he should be good to go to work on Monday.

He held the door for the short man. Jax and Leo were about the same height. His hair was in a simple buzz cut with neatly trimmed sideburns that stopped at the bottoms of his earlobes. God had a hard time looking into Jax’s beautiful hazel eyes, so similar to his partner’s. Jax shook his hand in a firm grip, surely firmer than needed, and God got the message. He quirked his lip up at Jax’s protectiveness over his little brother, he knew what that feeling was like.

As soon as Jax was gone, God grabbed his cell phone and texted his partner. He thought for a second on what to send, but only two words came to mind. He typed, I’m sorry, and pressed Send. God only had to wait a few seconds before his phone buzzed with a return message. God opened it, and Leo had two words, too. God read Leo’s response, Fuck you.

God laughed heartily as he stared at the two words with an angry-faced emoji symbol after it. Day was the only one that could make God laugh like that. Oh, you’re gonna make me work for this one, aren’t you, sweetheart? God climbed under the sheets, naked, and forced his mind to relax. He’d go get his man tomorrow.