“Alicia? You here?”

I smiled at the sound of Ryder’s voice before the smell of food drifted down the hallway.

“By the fireplace,” I said. “Bring that food with you. It smells phenomenal.”

“I’m telling you, bulgogi is the best. Over some white rice? I could eat pounds of it all day.”

“Well let’s not do that,” I said, grinning. “But I figured we could eat in here. Or maybe out by the pool?”

“I could get behind eating by the pool. Any particular reason?”

“I don’t know. I guess I don’t fear going out there anymore.”

I looked back at Ryder and found his eyes connected heavily with mine.

“What?” I asked.

“I didn’t know you were scared of going out there,” he said.

“I don’t think ‘scared’ is the right word. But I’ve been hesitant.”

“Do you want to talk about it.”

“Not really. I just want to reclaim it. It’s the last thing that reminds me of him, and I don’t want this beautiful place of your home to do that to me anymore.”

“Then I’ll go get us some drinks,” he said.

I watched Ryder set down the food before he backtracked into the kitchen. As I stared out the window into the backyard, my mind drifted back to that day. The day I had taken a nap and Langley had found us. How easily he could’ve killed me. Smothered me or taken me as I laid there on that lounge chair by the pool. I still looked out there and shivered at the mere thought of how close I had come. How vulnerable I had been without knowing it. But his pool and his hot tub beckoned to me. Whispered its relaxing tune and called for me to sink my body into its watery depths.

It was the last bond Langley had over me, and I was ready to break it.

I was ready to finally break free.

“Got us some drinks,” Ryder said.

“Do we need plates?” I asked.

“Do you have anything against eating from takeout trays?”

“Nope. Not one bit. Come on. I’ll get the food.”

I picked up the plastic bag and the two of us headed outside. The breeze was nice and the hot tub was steaming and I already felt better about things. The two of us headed over to the lounge chairs at the far side of the pool, and I watched Ryder get comfortable. He tossed his jacket over the back of his chair and loosened a few buttons on his shirt. He slipped out of his shoes and took off his socks, and for a moment I thought he was going to take off his pants.

“You’re staring,” he said with a grin.

“I’ve never known you to complain about that,” I said. “Which one’s yours?”

“They’re both the same.”

“So I have four pounds of food just for me?”

“Ha. Ha. Ha,” he said mockingly.

“You know you love it.”

I relaxed back into the lounge chair and opened up the steaming food. It smelled delicious and looked even better, and the first bite of bulgogi melted in my mouth. I moaned and groaned. Closed my eyes so I could properly savor all of the flavors bursting on my tongue. I’d never had bulgogi before, and I wasn’t sure what to expect.

But whatever I was expecting, I didn’t think it would be this good.

“I’ll have to take a few pointers from my dinner,” Ryder said.

“Shut up,” I said with a grin. “Tell me how your first day back at work went.”

“It was what it was. I hate paperwork. I got reminded of how much I hate paperwork.”

“Did you get any paper cuts?”

“You’re just full of jokes, aren’t you?”

“Hey! It’s a logical question. I got one on my tongue once.”

“You know they have envelopes you don’t have to lick closed anymore. And they also have this thing called ‘email’.”

“Who said I was licking an envelope closed?” I asked.

Scott panned his gaze over towards me and I threw my head back and laughed.

“Now I need to know.”

“You shall never know,” I said in a deep voice.

“How do you get a papercut on your tongue without licking an envelope.”

“Maybe one day I’ll let you in on the secret.”

“Yeah, that’s a secret you can keep to yourself,” he said, chuckling.

“You know, I actually think this is one meal I wouldn’t be able to replicate in the kitchen.”

“That’s the only kind of takeout I eat. The kind I can’t make myself.”

“Then you won’t be eating much takeout with me around. I’ve got multiple tricks up my sleeve when it comes to the kitchen.”

“Then I can’t wait to figure them all out,” he said.

It was nice to joke around with Ryder. To unwind with him after everything we had been through. I had been nervous about him going back to work so soon, but the second his doctor informed us he was good to go Ryder couldn’t get out the door fast enough. And I understood. He was cooped up and ready to get back to his life. But I knew we were dancing around an important topic that needed to be discussed.

Now that Ryder had openly admitted he didn’t want me leaving, it was time for me to tell him I didn’t want to leave, either. Which meant we would have to have a conversation about how the dynamic of us living together was going to go.

Which meant defining what we were.

“Ryder?”

“Hmm?”

“Did you mean what you said this afternoon?”

“You’ll have to be a little more specific,” he said.

“When you told me you didn’t want me to leave. Did you mean that?” I asked.

I watched him set his food on hip lap before he wiped his mouth with a napkin.

“I did,” he said. “But just because I enjoy you being here doesn’t mean you want to stay.”

“I do,” I said.

“You do?”

“Mhm.”

“So, then you’re not leaving.”

“But I don’t want you to think I don’t want to leave because I have nowhere else to go. I have places I could go,” I said.

“But you don’t want to.”

“No.”

“Can I ask why not?”

I set my food off to the side and swung my feet around the edge of the lounge chair. My eyes connected with his and I watched him match my movements. I wanted him to hear me when I said this, because it had taken me all day to build up the courage. My hands were shaking as I slid them along my thighs, then I perched my elbows on my knees.

“I enjoy spending time with you,” I said.

“I like having you around, too.”

“No, no. Just… just listen. I like it here. I enjoy it here. These past few weeks with you, in this place? It feels like home, Ryder. It makes me feel safe.”

I watched him reach for my hands and the warmth of his skin made me sigh.

“I’m glad you feel that way here,” he said. “But I want you to know that I don’t expect you to take care of me.”

“What?” I asked.

“What I don’t want to do is watch you fall back into those old routines. Cooking breakfast. Always having something ready to eat. Sitting around and waiting for me to get home. Grocery shopping. I don’t want you to think you have to do those things for me, Alicia. Now, if you want to do them, that’s a different story. But you aren’t required to do any of that for me.”

“I know,” I said.

“But I want you to hear it. I want you to know it’s a thing instead of always wondering. I’m not the kind of man that expects you to keep this house put together or dress in outstanding clothes all the time or have makeup plastered on for me when you get home. I’m a big boy. I can pick up my own clothes and do my own damn laundry.”

I giggled and shook my head as I brought his hand to my lips to kiss.

“Then I guess we should talk about what the hell I’m going to do with the rest of my life,” I said.

“There’s no hurry for you to figure it out,” he said. “As long as you’re here, I’ll take care of you in any way I can. But I want you to do what you want to do with your life. Everyone else gets that option. It’s time you had it, too.”

I felt tears crest my eyes as a smile crossed my cheeks.

“I’d have to go back to school if I wanted to do something with my degree.”

“Then go back to school,” he said. “Get your Master’s. Open your own practice or work with Social Services. I’ll help you in any way I can.”

“Or I could get a job with the degree I have now. As a school counselor or something.”

“You’d be a wonderful asset to them.”

“Or I could go back to school and get an entirely different degree. Like in English or I.T.”

“I didn’t know you enjoyed computers like that,” he said.

“I don’t,” I said with a shrug. “But the option’s there.”

“Yes,” he said with a smile. “Yes it is. And I can’t wait to help you figure out whatever it is you want to do.”

“Do you know what I want to do right now, though?” I asked.

I pulled his hands towards me and watched as his lips fell to mine. His hand came up to cup my cheek, his thumb gracing the swell of my skin. I sighed into his warmth as his hand fell to my waist, and I scooted to the edge of the lounge chair just to get closer to him.

“Mmm, that was nice,” Ryder said.

“You know what would be even nicer, though?” I asked.

“What’s that?”

“A dip in the hot tub.”

“I like the sound of that.”

“Naked.”

Ryder’s eyes widened and giggles fell from my lips. I was feeling reckless. Spontaneous. A little more like myself. Sitting in the lounge chair I had once felt so vulnerable in made me feel stronger. More capable. It reminded me of all the things I’d weathered and all of the things I had pulled through. But as I stood to my feet and watched Ryder’s shocked stare follow my body, it reminded me of something else.

It reminded me that I was still standing after everything that had happened.

I stood and stripped my clothes away, feeling freer than I ever had before. With each piece that fell to the concrete I could feel Ryder’s eyes on me. Sweeping across my legs and up my ass. Studying my back as I turned around to look at him. His tongue darted out to lick his lips and I could see his cock tenting his pants. He stood and removed his clothing, the fabric falling from his sculpted form. Gracing me with a perfect view of his marvelous strength as the sunset cast a warm glow over his edges.

Then I held my hand out for his and guided him to the hot water.

The two of us dipped in and the warmth was soothing. I sank all the way to my chin and let my body float around in the steaming water. Ryder sat on the side, his cock throbbing for attention and his eyes never looking away from me. I went under and felt the warmth encompass the whole of me, and I felt the last of my chains falling from my body. The last of Langley’s conditioning slipping from my mind.

For the first time since I was sixteen years old, I finally felt free.

I came up and stood to my feet, smoothing my hair back from my face. I felt Ryder’s hands grasp my hips, and he tugged my body over to him. I straddled his hips and giggled as our foreheads fell together, and the water dripping down my neck caught his eyes. He watched it fall all the way to my breasts before it disappeared over the tip of my nipple.

Then his hand came up to massage my breast.

My head fell back and I allowed myself to let loose. To allow Ryder’s motions to guide my body. The water was sloshing against my skin and the steam was pulling sweat down my brow, and I could feel Ryder’s dick throbbing against my thigh.

“Whatever you want, Alicia-- whatever you need-- you have it from me.”

He slipped into me, pulling a gasp from my throat as his hands rushed up my back. He pulled me to him as he slid in, inch by inch, until not even the heated water separated it. My breasts fell to his chiseled chest, blanketing the strong divots of his muscles. I filled every crevice of him and he cloaked me with his strength as our lips joined together.

“I love you,” I said with a whisper.

My eyes fluttered open and I found him staring back at me as his hands dropped to my hips. He rolled me, causing me to shiver as my knees planted beside him. His cock pulsed. His grip tightening. My hands slid up the back of his neck and twirled into the thick tresses of his hair.

Then his nose nuzzled against mine as he stopped my movements.

“I love you too, Alicia.”

And suddenly, like they should have all those years ago, things fell into their rightful spot.