Chapter Seven
Maverick
You know that moment when self-doubt takes over and you start second guessing everything, wondering what the hell you were thinking? Yeah, that was me as I stood outside of the auditorium doors, waiting for my turn to go in and audition in front of Mr. Lee, the band director, and the choir teacher for the role of the Beast.
I had chickened out Monday and didn’t even go to the performing arts building. Tuesday, I had gone to the building, but never went inside. Thanks to Sarah, who pushed me to suck it up—literally, she pushed me and dragged me here—I was now signed in on the roster and waiting for my name to be called.
I held a songbook from Les Miserables, one that had the piano accompaniment, so that the pianist helping with the auditions would be able to play the song I wanted. Having the sheet music had basically been the only requirement.
“Ohmygosh, sweetcakes,” Sarah said, fanning me. “Breathe. It’ll be okay. The worst that can happen is they don’t like you and give the part to someone else.”
She had already auditioned with “Think of Me” from Phantom of the Opera, and it was pretty much guaranteed she got the part.
“Thanks. That makes me feel so much better.” The level of sarcasm in my voice was affected by my nerves as I put my ear to the door and listened to the guy on stage before me. So instead of sounding like a smartass, I sounded exactly how I felt.
“Peter is gonna be tough to beat,” Sarah said, touching the middle of my back as she leaned forward to hear too. She really sucked with pep talks. “He’s been taking voice lessons for like two years.”
“I’m doomed,” I said, accepting my fate.
And even worse? Peter had chosen a song from Les Miserables as well. And only the most awesome and hard as hell to sing one too: “Bring Him Home.”
I’d debated on doing that one, but my voice cracked way too much on the high notes. I was no Hugh Jackman. That was for sure.
“I think I’m gonna puke,” I said as Peter’s voice drifted to my ears.
Dang. The guy could really sing. As he got to the section at the end, when the song reached its peak of excellence and he sang of dying if it meant the boy could live, I kissed my role as the Beast goodbye.
“Hey, Maverick.”
I flipped around to see Avery.
He held a book to his chest in that introverted way, but the smile on his face was warm and full of the encouragement he’d given me the night by the train tracks. His straight black hair angled down his face, and his pale blue eyes were made even more so by the dark eyeliner surrounding them.
“Hey!” I said, stepping away from the door toward him. “What are you doing here? Are you goin’ to audition after all?”
The auditions were held after school, so not many people were around. Only the drama kids, and the football guys—who I could see through the window practicing in the small field across the road—were there.
If I’d chosen a different path that year, I would’ve been out there practicing plays with them, instead of nearly pissing myself in the performing arts building.
“Um, no,” Avery answered, and his smile turned shy. “I wanted to come wish you good luck. Or break a foot, or whatever it’s called in the theater world.”
I snorted. He was too cute.
“Break a leg,” Sarah corrected him with a giggle. “But aww, that’s so sweet of you to be here for Mav.” I didn’t miss the way she gave me side-eye, either, as if she suspected something between us. “I’m Sarah, by the way. I know you know that, but we haven’t officially introduced ourselves.” She held out her hand to him.
He hesitated before taking it. “Cool. I’m Avery.”
“Thanks for showing up for me,” I said, not sure why the action touched me so much. My own boyfriend couldn’t even bother to return my calls or texts the past few days when I told him about the audition, and yet, Avery—a guy I barely knew but wanted to know better—had gone out of his way to wish me luck.
“Well, I remembered how nervous you said you were,” Avery said, dropping his gaze to his ragged Converse shoes.
“Oh! I have an idea,” Sarah exclaimed. “How about we go out to dinner after this? You aren’t working tonight, are you Mavy?”
I shook my head. “Not tonight. Dinner would be great.” My eyes instantly flashed to Avery. “You’re coming too, right?”
His eyes widened, as if he’d assumed he wasn’t part of the invitation. But then something else flitted across his face, reminding me of the look he’d given me the night I dropped him off at home. Embarrassment.
“Not sure I can tonight,” he answered, a bit sad.
“It’s my treat,” I said, getting the impression money was the issue. “It can either be a celebration of an amazing audition, or a pick-me-up after I bomb it.”
“Thanks. Sounds fun,” Avery said with a small smile. “And you’ll do great.”
The auditorium doors opened, and I jumped at the sudden sound. Peter came walking out, giving me a smug grin. His small frame, perfectly styled auburn hair, and greater than thou strut only added to his obvious arrogance.
“Your turn, jock boy,” he said in a honeyed voice. “Fat chance of topping that performance.”
Since he was in choir instead of drama, I didn’t know him that well, but from his attitude, I was glad for that.
“Er, thanks,” I said, ignoring his jabs. I didn’t want to sink to his level. “Awesome job in there.”
“I know,” he said before giving me the up-down. Of course, his gaze landed on the book in my hands. “You’re seriously doing a song from Les Mis? How convenient, seeing as your audition will reflect the musical. Miserable.”
Without another word, he turned his back to me and left.
“He is a total diva,” Sarah stated the obvious and looked at me. “Ignore him. He’s just trying to throw you off your game.”
The doors creaked opened and Mr. Lee appeared. “Hey, guys. Mav, you ready?”
For some reason, I looked at Avery, and he offered me an encouraging smile. I tried to take from that confidence. Sarah gave me a quick hug before stepping back and putting her hands to her mouth in an excited way as she bounced.
I nodded to Mr. Lee and walked inside, fighting the jelly feeling in my legs.
The room was quiet as I neared the stage, the only sounds being my footsteps and the slight scraping of chairs as the judges shifted in their seats. My head buzzed as I ran through the lyrics, and I said a silent prayer that I wouldn’t forget any of the words.
Adrenaline made my body tremble a bit, and it reminded me of how I felt before a big game. The roar of the crowd usually helped pump me up, but in that auditorium, there was no chanting crowd or cheerleaders; there was only the racing of my heart and the soft exhales escaping my lips.
“Good afternoon,” I said once I took my spot on the stage. The lights were dimmed in the audience, but I could see the judges in the center, surrounded by all the empty chairs. “I’m Maverick, and I’m auditioning for the role of the Beast.”
Mrs. Higgins, the choir teacher, had a kind of intimidating quality to her. She was in her mid-forties, and had one of those faces where she always looked like she was mad, even when she was just sitting there.
“What are you singing today?” Mr. Lopez, the band director, asked, nodding to the book I held.
That’s when an idea struck me. When it came to vocal talent, Peter beat me. And while “Stars,” the song I’d originally picked, was pretty and showed a good vocal range, I was certain it would fall flat compared to the one that came before it.
Sometimes an amazing vocal performance wasn’t just how high you could sing or how long you could hold out said high notes… sometimes it was purely emotional. Something that grips your heart, keeps you on the edge of your seat, and makes you feel.
“I’ll be singing “Empty Chairs at Empty Tables” from Les Miserables,” I answered before walking over to the pianist and handing her the songbook.
This song was one that hit me right in the chest, and it was the one part while watching the movie that really made me tear up. It took place after a battle, when a guy’s friends had all died, and he’s looking at the places they used to sit and talk, knowing they’d never do so again and questioning what their sacrifice was for.
I might not have been the best singer, but I hoped my emotional performance could score me some extra points.
“Begin when you’re ready,” Mrs. Higgins said, her face expressionless.
The first few measures of the song were vocal only, and the piano would come in afterward, softly.
One moment passed, then another, as I steadied my nerves and deeply inhaled and exhaled. I looked up and focused on the back of the auditorium, seeing a light come through the slightly ajar door.
Sarah and Avery must’ve been on the other side, waiting. Listening.
I pictured them there, and the image gave me confidence, knowing I had their support even though I couldn’t see them. My hands shook, as did my breaths, but I mustered up courage, and tried to put myself in the headspace of the song.
And then I started singing.
As the beginning words escaped my lips, it was so quiet I was sure they could hear the frantic beating of my heart. But something kind of magical happened. Once the piano came in, I relaxed a considerable amount.
War. Men dying for a cause they believed in, but one that shouldn’t have even happened in the first place. The pain that’s left behind from the survivors and loved ones. I put myself in that mindset and not only sang the words, but I felt them deep in my soul.
Toward the end of the song, there’s an intense part as the character’s anger at such a tragedy takes him over, but I didn’t overthink it or worry about hitting the higher, more powerful notes. I sang through the anger and grief.
When I sang the last word, letting the note linger in the air a short moment before cutting it off, nothing but silence followed.
And then applause.
Noise from the back of the room drew my attention, where I then saw Sarah jumping up and down, clapping and squealing like a crazy woman. Avery was there too, but he wasn’t being as loud as Sarah. He clapped and stared down at me.
Mr. Lee stood and applauded. “Wow. Well done, Mav.”
Yeah, I knew it wasn’t a perfect performance, but I’d done my best. And when it came down to it, that’s what mattered. I’d given it my all, and regardless of what happened after that, at least I could hold my head up high and be proud.
After thanking the judges for their time and leaving the stage, I approached my friends in the very back. Avery stepped back a little once I was in front of them, and I guessed it was because he had a thing with personal space. Which wasn’t bad or anything; it just made me wonder what had happened to make him so timid.
Sarah attacked me with excited hugs. “Ohmygosh! That was amazing. You made me cry.”
“Is that a good thing?”
She slapped my arm like what I’d asked was the most stupid question ever. We eventually made it back out into the lobby area, where we passed the next girl awaiting her turn. Sarah offered her a few words of encouragement, which made the other girl liven up some.
“So.” I faced Avery and a still exuberant Sarah. “Where are we eating?”
***
After deciding on a Mexican restaurant, we drove there in my car. It was a nice place right smack dab in the center of town, with decent prices and delicious food. Sarah and I’d eaten there together a handful of times, but Avery hadn’t.
“You haven’t lived until you’ve eaten a chimichanga smothered in cheese sauce,” I said to Avery as we got out of the car and walked toward the entrance. “It’s deep fried amazingness stuffed with chicken or you can have pork if you want.”
Avery stayed silent, holding onto that awkwardness, but the corner of his mouth lifted.
Once we were inside and seated at a booth in the back of the room, a waiter came to take our drink orders before leaving again. I didn’t bother looking at the menu, already knowing what I wanted, but Sarah and Avery grabbed one to look over.
“So, Avery,” Sarah said, peering up from her menu to study him. “What’s your story?”
Sarah was sitting beside me in the booth and Avery was across from us.
“My story?” he asked.
“Yeah, like, where did you move from, do you have any siblings, in particular, an older brother?” She winked at the last part, and I suppressed a laugh. “Also, do you like it here?”
Rightly so, Avery was taken aback by the onrush of questions. “Um. I have a brother, and he’s fourteen.”
“Darn it!” Sarah said, playfully banging her fist on the table. “I guess in a few years when he’s at least eighteen, I could be a cougar.”
The waiter walked up to the table at that exact moment, clearly hearing the end of her statement by the way his eyebrows shot up. “Have you decided on dinner?”
Sarah, who was blushing furiously, ducked her head and coughed before holding the menu up. “I’ll have a beef taco with cheese sauce, and a side of red rice and beans.”
“I’ll have the chimichanga with chicken and extra cheese sauce, and a side of rice and beans too,” I said before looking at Avery. His shoulders were stiff and the poor guy looked so lost. I couldn’t determine if he was just undecided about what he wanted to order or if there was another reason. When he looked at me, I asked, “Do you want what I’m having?”
Relief flickered across his face, and he nodded. “Yes, please.”
The waiter wrote the order and left.
“Mavy, I still can’t get over how great you were today,” Sarah said after taking a drink of her soda. “What were you thinking about during it?”
“I don’t know,” I said, shrugging. “I think I just put myself in his position. Thinking of war and how senseless it is sometimes.”
“They’d be idiots not to give you the part,” she said. “Plus, I’m like ninety-nine percent sure I got Belle, so you have to be my Beast.”
“I agree,” Avery said, and I met his gaze from across the table. “You may not be a pro, but that was one hell of a performance.”
One heartbeat turned to two and neither of us looked away. It was hard to describe, but it was like we were both magnets and the eye contact triggered the forces to start pulling us together. I even gripped the edge of the table to try to keep myself from moving. It was weird.
Then, he looked away, and the energy sizzling between us was broken.
“Do you need to call your parents and let them know you won’t be home until later?” I asked Avery.
“No, it’s okay,” he answered. “I told Declan I was staying after school, so he’ll tell our mom. Is it okay if you give me a ride home, though? I can walk if not.”
“Hell no, you’re not walking home.” He lived literally on the other side of town, and it’d take him forever to get home. Not to mention, I’d kind of like the extra time with him after dropping Sarah off. “It’s no problem at all.”
He responded with a shy smile. “Thanks.”
Sarah looked between us, clearly not missing the way I stared at Avery just a bit longer than necessary.